Prince Sidon Rule 34

Prince Sidon Rule 34
Prince Sidon is a charmer, apparently
Let’s talk about the word ‘elasmobranchophilia’. Elasmobranchophilia is the term for a sexual attraction to sharks, and other similar elasmobranchs like rays and skates. The very existence of the word elasmobranchophilia is fucking terrifying.
Now let’s talk about The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild , the recently released entry in the wildly popular Nintendo series. Breath of the Wild is the first proper landmark game for the new Nintendo Switch console, and in the new game is a ‘Zora’ (shark) character called Prince Sidon.
Since the game’s release, Zelda and elasmobranchophilia have improbably collided, in scenes that Twitter at large is quite happily encouraging. Zelda players are sharing tweets, memes, and… other demonstrations of their attraction to Prince Sidon: elasmobranchophilia in motion. And, because we thought you should know, we’re going to look at some examples now.
Motivation quote of the day pic.twitter.com/f0Egx0SI90
— Motivational Sidon (@BotW_Sidon) March 8, 2017
wow find someone who looks @ u the way link looks at prince sidon pic.twitter.com/4ohZ2Zks0a
— lui (@peterparkered) March 11, 2017
— ????? ? (@nonixnil) March 12, 2017
— adrienette ♡ QoN void ♡ watch miraculous?? (@feysandarling) March 12, 2017
https://twitter.com/Veedramon/status/837895024176205824
— ? Ros ?@ post lads depression (@BlGFROGS) March 10, 2017
I don't know about anyone else but but in my copy of BTOW THEY GOT ENGAGED!? THERE WAS A WEDDING AT THE END AND EVERYTHING #Sidon #link #LOZ pic.twitter.com/m12dykHbur
— Bloatedcrayon (@BLOATEDCRAYON) March 9, 2017
I'm sorry I have so many feels about these two//mainly Sidon. Plz excuse mistakes I made this too quick;;;; pic.twitter.com/s8jtHOCpR4
— ⭐️✨Prom✨⭐️ (@Promsienn) March 13, 2017
https://twitter.com/FIGHTBEAST_/status/840543419298697216?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
Is the shark prince man going to be the thing that finally gets me to play Zelda
— Keezy Young ?? It's Ghost Time (@KeezyBees) March 13, 2017
NSFW as usual I guess, been playing a whole lotta Breath of the Wild and uh… wow, Sidon is pretty hot. I couldn't resist. >w>; pic.twitter.com/dnATOJfjKR
— ? See pinned tweet please! ? ?️‍⚧️ (@SPELLBL4DE) March 7, 2017
Forgive me just this once pic.twitter.com/GUGoIGfhyD
— Kimo Force | Mao Mao EP02 (@KimoForce) March 11, 2017
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Posted
4 years ago by
CJ Andriessen

Just what the internet needs: yet another white guy writing about video games.

2017 was the year fishmen suddenly became sexy. Not just among the weeaboo anime-tentacle-monster crowd, but among mainstream audiences too. It started with rule 34 star Prince Sidon from The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild last March but really caught fire when the first trailer for The Shape of Water – the movie everybody on Twitter claimed to invent the phrase “Grinding Nemo” for – debuted online. Don’t know how, don’t know why, but last year ended on a weird note with women across the internet fantasizing about a scaly, salinated South American sea creature that wooed Sally Hawkins out of her clothes and into a sex scene that guaranteed she lost the deposit on her apartment.
Women got hot and heavy over these guys like Troy McClure at an aquarium, prompting articles like this , this , and this . The dildo inspired by Guillermo Del Toro’s creature straight up sold out over Oscar weekend. I guess after a year of learning every man on the planet is a sex monster, a sea monster suddenly didn’t look so bad. Women took one look at Doug Jones’ creepily spread out eyes and decided they, like Kanye, love fish sticks.
You know what ladies? Go ahead. Enjoy your fishmen with their fibroelastic penises and their all-egg-and-cat-head diet. I’m sure that will make for some lovely morning breath. Go ahead and run off into the ocean with your creatures from the lame lagoon because I also learned something from the movies in 2017: we don’t need you anymore. Between Kofi Siriboe with two grapefruits in Girls Trip and Timothée Chalamet going to town on that peach in Call Me By Your Name , it seems to me men can just get by just fine with a nice ripe piece of fruit.
So while you’re still thinking of how fun it would be to have an overgrown Murloch go down on you while signing fewer words than Koko, I’ve compiled this list of the absolute best video game fruit to fuck.
According to Call Me By Your Name , a peach is a viable substitute for Armie Hammer’s butthole, and there are no better peaches in gaming than the ones that grow in your Animal Crossing town. So shake a tree, pop out the seed, and go to town pretending that piece of fruit is a young Billy Graham. Or, use two at a time and just tell yourself it’s the Winklevoss Twins.
According to legend, “If two people share a Paopu Fruit, their destinies become intertwined. They’ll remain a part of each other’s lives no matter what.” Well, according to a different legend, if two guys share a Paopu Fruit using their dicks, they’ll finally understand the entirety of the Kingdom Hearts storyline.
The Bubble Bobble series has a wide array of food a drunk fraternity pledge would shove his dick into as part of hazing ritual that his brothers tell him builds character and strengthens their bonds somehow, but this list is only focusing on fruit so suck it cakes. Diehard fans of the series know a regular orange is only worth 700 points, but a giant orange is worth a whopping 20,000 points, making it 28 times more worthy of your dick than the smaller variety. That’s science.
It’s everything you need for you, Sully, and Karl Schäfer to have yourself a lemon party.
Super Mario’s vacation to Delfino Island was a bright and cheery adventure full of surf, sand, and succulent fruit just waiting to have your dick stuck in them. But not all fruit in this tropical paradise is created equal. In fact, some of it can be quite dangerous. So, to save you some pain, I’ve created this handy-dandy infographic to let you know which fruits are okay to fuck, and which ones you should avoid.
You might be asking yourself “Why Dr. Peelgood? Why not Nanaman or Sea of Thieves ‘ whole bananas or any of the bananas from the Donkey Kong franchise?” Why? I’ll tell you why. Because this is Destructoid goddammit, and if there is one thing we have an affinity towards here, it’s giant purple things from games you stick in your ass.
Wumpa Fruit has been a mainstay of the Crash Bandicoot series since the original games all the way back on the PlayStation. It’s Crash’s favorite fruit and if he collects 100 of them, he earns an extra life. Little known fact, if he puts his dick in 100 of them, he earns two extra lives. That’s why when you’re at your local farmers market this weekend, you need to make sure you put your dick in every Wumpa Fruit you can find. That way you’ll live forever.
Perhaps you’re one of the 37 people who remember the scene from 8 Days a Week or maybe you’ve lingered too long in the produce section of your local grocery store while gently tapping watermelons looking for that perfect, almost-hollow sound, but putting your junk in a watermelon is the most obvious example of fruit fucking there is, or so I’ve been told. And there is no more famous a watermelon than the one from Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island .
But guess what, this is a trick entry. That’s right, you should not stick yo dick in the Yoshi’s Island watermelon because it is chock full of seeds. That’s dangerous from what I understand and certainly not from one lonely night two years ago. So unless you want to explain to an emergency room nurse how a big black seed got stuck in your urethra, do not try to have sex with the Yoshi’s Island watermelon. Also, avoid the Fruit Ninja watermelons cause they got seeds in them too.
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A major reason why Breath Of The Wild is so beloved is because of its characters. Here are some details fans may have missed about them.
With a massive fanbase ranging from newcomers to veterans of gaming, Breath Of The Wild is truly one of those special games that defines an era. It's full of beautiful little details and weaves a story that's both introspective and engaging, one that leaves players thinking about it long after they've played.
However, some fans may have missed some key details about the main cast of characters. Although these characters are certainly memorable in their own right, the game is fairly lonesome, primarily following Link's own journey through Hyrule. Many things about these characters may have flown under the radar - here they are compiled in one list. Please note that heights and ages are extrapolated in most cases from available series information.
The franchise's beloved hero is solidly average in the height department, standing at 5'7 in BOTW . This seems to be typical for Hylians, as he's generally as tall as most other Hylian men in the game. Age-wise, he's about 17 or 18 - the age Hylians consider to be the start of adulthood .
As for his relationship status...well, that is the question, isn't it? There are multiple opportunities to suggest Link returns the feelings of either Mipha or Zelda, both of whom he is already close to. There's also some moments that suggest he's as romantically oblivious as most boys his age. Perhaps the sequel will finally give some closure on this subject!
Similar to Link, Zelda is fairly average in height, standing slightly shorter than him at 5'6. She also explicitly states that she is 17 in Memory 10, where she explains to Link that she is finally old enough to climb Mt. Lanayru and seek guidance from its Spring of Wisdom.
Something fans enjoyed about her character was her burgeoning relationship with Link, who she comes to care for far beyond his role as her bodyguard. And while many NPCs comment on her beauty, it's Link's attention she seeks the most - will she finally get her chance to confess in the sequel?
Although Impa was quite tall in Age of Calamity , she has aged quite a bit since her bodyguard days and has seemingly shrunk in size from 5'9 to 4'5. Hylians also live quite a long time, so by the time Link wakes up 100 years after the Calamity, Impa is about 121 years old.
And since she has a granddaughter, Paya, it's implied that at some point, she settled down with another Sheikah in Kakariko Village. Sadly, he seems to have passed on, along with Paya's parents. Thankfully, she still has her granddaughter, at the very least.
The shy young Sheikah seems to have inherited her grandmother's height, standing fairly tall for a Sheikah girl at 5'9. It's also implied that she's around Link's age, 18 or so, since her crush on him is such a focal point of her character.
Speaking of which: although fans were delighted by how hard she crushed on Link, she was always too shy to act on it. Players could bear witness to her thoughts and feelings in her journal, but that's about as far as it ever went. Who knows what could happen, though!
Like her younger sister Impa, Purah shrunk in size over the years, but for a wildly different reason. After experimenting with age-reversing technology to keep the Sheikah elders alive, so they may aid Link when he awakens, Purah went from an average height to physically child-sized - about 3'8, specifically.
However, she remained the older sister, being around 125 years old in total. Yet even during her "normal" years, Purah never saw the need to marry, as evidenced by her bachelorette lifestyle and devotion to her craft. She seems perfectly happy doing her own thing.
The Zora in general tend to stand taller than Hylians , but Prince Sidon is definitely bigger than average, standing at a whopping 6'9. As well as this, Zora tend to age slowly by comparison, so by their standards, he's an energetic young man at the spritely age of 135.
Fans are continuously delighted by Sidon, both because of his looks and his personality, so they (and the Zora girls who always comment on him) will be happy to know he's still available! However, some fans believe he should end up with Link in the end because of their chemistry. Regardless of what lies in store for the two, it cannot be denied that they share a strong bond.
While the Zora are generally tall, their little princess is shorter than even some Hylian women , standing at barely 5'2. However, she's roughly the same age as Link and Zelda, albeit in Zora years, making her about 55 years old.
As one of the most tragic characters in the game, fans were saddened that she never got the chance to tell Link just how much she loved him. However, she is technically engaged to him: Link's Zora armor was crafted by her, and in Zora culture, crafting armor is akin to making an engagement ring. Whether this will actually go anywhere remains to be seen.
Lady Dimitrescu isn't the only tall woman in gaming to admire - Urbosa stands tall and proud at 6'7. This seems to be the standard for Gerudo adults, yet her confidence makes her seem even taller. As for her age, Gerudo seem to age at the same rate as Hylians, so she's likely in her forties, around 47.
Since the present-day Gerudo Chief, Riju, is a descendant of Urbosa, it can be assumed that she found a partner and had a child with them. However, this partner did not seem significant enough to be mentioned even in passing, so either Urbosa was very private about her romantic life, or this partner was simply the father of her child and nothing more.
Gorons are easily the tallest beings in Hyrule, so that puts Daruk at a whopping 7'2, towering over the other Champions. And considering Link's modern ally, Yunobo, is a descendant of Daruk, the Goron Champion was probably middle-aged, around 50 or so.
Out of all the canonical courtships in the Zelda franchise, Goron families are some of the most interesting , since Goron pairs will take a chunk of rock from Death Mountain and ask for a heavenly blessing to bring their rock-baby to life. Like Urbosa, Daruk's partner is a mystery - although he may not have even had one!
The Rito are descendants of the Zora, so they are around the same height on average. Revali in particular is about 6'3, not exactly looming over Link, but still a fair amount taller. And however arrogant he may be, he also has a touch of maturity about him, making him slightly older at 21.
That said, the Rito seem to be a people who take their passions seriously, and Revali is no different. It seems he never formed strong bonds with anyone in his village and instead dedicated his life to being the best warrior he could be. And although he had so much to be proud of, it was implied in his journals he was a bit lonely at times.

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Prince Sidon Rule 34

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