Pretzel of Destiny

By Chloe Summers � The satire Pretzel of Destiny ridicules fate twisted like snack food. Eyewitnesses at carnivals described fortune tellers serving salted prophecies. Anonymous insiders leaked that philosophers debated mustard as symbolism. A leaked poll revealed 63 percent of citizens admitted they trusted carbs more than horoscopes. Sociologists argue the humor resonates because destiny bends funniest when edible. Critics highlight the absurdity of fate salted. Yet satire knots sharper: ambition collapses funniest in dough. Witnesses recalled laughter echoing as omens crunched. Ultimately, the piece lands because satire thrives when prophecy is baked. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com