Pregnant Trap

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Many a man has been snared by an announcement that a woman is pregnant with his child. How can you tell whether an “accidental” pregnancy is a trap or legit? How can you catch someone faking a pregnancy? 
I've heard so many baby trap stories that I often ask couples that I'm counseling whether their children were planned. If the answer is "no", then I can ask more questions to get a sense of whether the pregnancies were just accidents or they were purposeful manipulations. 
A pregnancy may be accidental-on-purpose. Like the one a woman was working on when her boyfriend walked in on her inseminating herself with semen from his used condom. (She had retrieved the condom out of the garbage can!)
Women intent on baby trapping a man may not let the fact that they haven’t gotten pregnant get in their way. They may fake it until they can make it.
Accidents do happen. Sometimes the best-laid plans run amuck and create offspring.
Other times, women use pregnancy to trap their man or his money.
It can be very difficult to figure out if a surprise pregnancy was truly accidental or secretly planned.
I’m going to give you 8 pregnancy trap red flags and tell you how to protect yourself from being trapped by a pregnancy.
Trap Red Flag #1. The pregnancy pulled you back from the brink.
If you were thinking about breaking up with her—the pregnancy might be a trap.
It may be more than a coincidence that your girlfriend or wife announced she was pregnant right after you broke up with her. You might not have actually made the declaration that you were breaking up out loud yet but she was getting the break-up vibe from you.
The pregnancy may be a preemptive move to cut off your chance of getting away.
Trap Red Flag #2. You’ve made it clear you don’t want kids now.
If you told her you don’t want kids now—the pregnancy might be a trap.
She may not care what your thoughts/feelings are about fatherhood, or she may have convinced herself that you’re going to be OK with having a child if it is flung on you, you’re just apprehensive about committing. So she decides to take the decision away from you and make it happen. She then says it was an accident, but it was actually the result of a well-conceived plan (figuratively and literally).
This trap may be direct or indirect. A direct trap would be that the pregnancy is intended to secure your relationship or financial support. An indirect trap would be that the primary objective is motherhood, you’re being trapped into fatherhood may be extraneous to that objective. Your seed is necessary for her motherhood but beyond that, you may or may not be relevant to her.
Trap Red Flag #3. She has something to gain from being your baby momma.
If she will benefit in some way from the pregnancy—the pregnancy might be a trap.
A woman who has decided on her own that having your baby has some payoff for her and that that payoff trumps your desire to not have children right now is ripe for becoming your baby momma whether you’re up for it or not.
There are many potential pregnancy benefits that might motivate a woman to get pregnant accidentally-on-purpose. She may want to:
seal the deal on your relationship (even if Red Flag #1 doesn’t apply and things seem to be going well),
get you to support her directly or through child support,
This red flag could be in play even if she presents herself as disappointed that she is pregnant. The disappointment could be a show to cover her tracks.
Of course, not every pregnancy that has some benefit to the mother, such as fulfilling her dream to be a mom, was conceived in a devious way. Each red flag is intended to get your attention and help you pause to consider the possibilities.
Trap Red Flag #4. She has a lame excuse for going off birth control.
If she says she went off of her birth control for a reason other than getting pregnant and she suddenly got pregnant—the pregnancy might be a trap.
There are legitimate reasons for going off of birth control pills. The hormones in the pills make some women feel sick (though this is usually evident when a woman starts taking the pills, not usually something that suddenly happens later).
Similarly, a woman’s IUD (Intrauterine Device) may come out on its own, but when this does happen it is usually in the first few months of use.
However, the most common reason for going off of birth control pills or getting an IUD removed is—drum roll please—to get pregnant.
It is particularly suspicious when she failed to tell you that she was no longer protected by her customary birth control until after “oops, I’m pregnant.” Why didn’t she give you a heads-up that she had pulled the goalie?
Trap Red Flag #5. She seduced you.
Trap Red Flag #6. She convinced you to “go ahead, I can’t get pregnant today.”
Trap Red Flag #7. She’s not really pregnant.
Trap Red Flag #8. She has a conveniently timed miscarriage.
 If she suddenly isn’t pregnant anymore—the “pregnancy” might have been a trap. A miscarriage may be a cover story for a pregnancy that never was. Eventually, the lie is going to catch up with her. There is only so much time to run with a false pregnancy story. Something eventually has to happen. Either she has to start looking pregnant or she needs to end the “pregnancy.” Women have been known to manufacture a bulging belly to keep the fake pregnancy story alive long enough to secure the trap on her man, but even that extreme measure can only take them so far. The most common time for a pretend miscarriage to end a pretend pregnancy is after marriage or other commitment markers. You then may think you shouldn’da put a ring on it, but it’s now a much more difficult proposition to get away from her. But then again, lots of real pregnancies end in miscarriage.
To recap, here are the 8 Pregnancy Trap Red Flags
#1. The pregnancy pulled you back from the brink.
#2. You’ve made it clear you don’t want kids now.
#3. She has something to gain from being your baby momma.
#4. She has a lame excuse for going off birth control.
#6 . She convinced you to “go ahead, I can’t get pregnant today.”
#8. She has a conveniently timed miscarriage.
Trapping a man with a pregnancy and other forms of taking his reproductive rights away is partner sexual abuse. If you are being tricked into fatherhood, chances are you are vulnerable to other ways women abuse men, y ou need my books: 



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Cara you are a piece of garbage. Just remember you reap what you sow. Dont go crying to a forum or anyone else when you get used and manipulated like you have done. Actually, when you do, make sure you post the entire story of what you did to him so everyone can burn you with “serves you right”.
I’m sorry that you got trapped by this sick woman but glad that I was able to provide you with a forum for getting to share your story. Hopefully, you feel somewhat lighter. Your story now has the chance of helping others.
A bright light in your story is that it sounds like the kids saw reality and you have a strong relationship with them. (It doesn’t always happen that way. Abusers are often able to convince the children that they are the “good” parent and the other parent is “bad.”)
I’ve started over several times in my life. You may not know yet how great life is going to be for you now that she isn’t able to distract your mind, sap your energy, and undermine your efforts.
Again — thanks for sharing your story,
I’m a 47 yo man. I was trapped 23 years ago.
I was dating her for about 2 years before I went off to Marine Boot Camp. I had decided to break off the relationship as soon as I got back home. That way she would already be getting used to me not being around. I didn’t love her and she had multiple issues I couldn’t deal with anymore. A few months after I got home I got a call from her crazy sister asking me if I wanted to come see my 2 mo daughter. Shocker!!!!
A few weeks later I spent the night to stay with my daughter. I found the birth control pills that she stopped using a few months before I left for Boot Camp. Confronted her… she denied it it, just like everything else, for years. She was a compulsive lire, drug addict, schizophrenic, and drank fairly often. I stuck with it and put up with shit for 18 years. I worked my ass off, did most of the cooking, cleaning, chores and helped with the kids homework every night while running a business. She was useless! And a horrible mother. I put up with her crap because I know how fathers are treated in our sorry ass court system. I even took care of her for the sake of the kids. She had health problems too. Mostly the symptoms from her very poor lifestyle.
Finally after 18 years I kicked her ass out. I wasn’t dumb enough to marry her.
A year and a half later she died. She drank and smoked herself to death. Plus she got her Doctors to give her all the pain pill prescriptions they could write.
I had kept her pain meds locked up and had to give her the doses. BTW, she didn’t need them. I got her off of them twice.
She was such a horrible person that we didn’t even go to the funeral.
She hijacked and altered the course of my entire life. I had to pass up a lot of opportunities.
She cost me a lot of money. Even stole money from me, her daughter, and my business many times.
I’m glad she’s dead.
Hi flabergasted. It sure looks like the woman’s story fits as a fake pregnancy trap: (1) announcing she was pregnant after the break-up (2) the dates not adding up (3) the “miscarriage.” There’s no point in trying to get her to admit it. That’s not going to happen. You also may not be able to get your husband to admit to himself or you that he was fooled by her, but hopefully he’s done fooling around on you.
I need to know how I can get this woman to admit she got pregnant on purpose. the facts my Husband brought the stupid woman to a hotel with in walking distance of the house, I confronted her and told her that he was my husband. after a long conversation. I don’t want to hear about his cheating. but He decided to Call her May 8th to tell her he could no longer speak with her. She said ok she didn’t care and then 10 to 11 days later she supposedly Got pregnant. He fessed up that we have a big problem and that she is pregnant with his child on June 18. I asked him, since he went with her to confirm the pregnancy, Did you see a sonogram? if so How far along is she. He said about 5 weeks. so I did the math over and over again to possibly show him that she may have been sleeping around. and now Sept 22 she tells him that she lost the baby. that would put her at about 21 to 22 weeks pregnant. I really want to know if she really was pregnant or got pregnant on purpose or tried to pawn the baby off on him. Because it just too coincidental that she got pregnant right after he said he couldn’t talk to her anymore. I know he is feeling bad for her story and is too embarrassed of himself to admit that he fell for it. I want to find out some how if she did it on purpose. not to shame him, but to open his eyes that not all but some woman will do this. because I guess of how he is feeling about me telling him she did it on purpose that he tried to tell me i got pregnant on purpose Because I am more experienced with Motherhood and older then him, that I should have know better. when He knew I was not on BC. there was no declaration from either of us we didn’t want any kids right now. We both understood that pregnancy could happen. I never told him to not worry about me getting pregnant. In fact when I told him I was pregnant I said I am telling you because you deserve to know. He was free to choose whatever he wanted. (It would hurt) but I told him I was fine if he wanted to leave. I was not trying to tie him down.
I think that’s what emma roberts did to garrett hedlund.
Kat Cook: Thanks for adding these stories of a woman using the pregnancy trap multiple times. I’ve seen another case of a woman using it a couple of times. Each attempt lets her hone her skills until she finally snares a guy.
This is a valuable and interesting article. I know a woman who “accidentally” got pregnant 3 times, trying to trap 3 different men. Are we do stupid to believe these are accidents. Only the 3rd man married her, but I’m not so sure that will stop her from looking for a 4th man to trap. Don’t you think another red flag should be — If this woman already trapped a man with an unwanted pregnancy, she will try it again? I feel sorry for trapped daddy #2 and #3, but it seems like they could have used common sense to not get trapped like the 1st daddy. Also, another red flag when she says, “I’m a devout Catholic!”, nothing against Catholics, but that should tell you that although she can’t keep her legs shut (which is a sin to Catholics, too), she’s not about start using birth control because that’s also supposedly a sin…..smh.
Stuart: Sorry to hear the pain that you are carrying. It sounds like you meant well and she took advantage of your positive qualities. You are not alone if having had that experience. Many other nice guys have been manipulated in a similar way. Hopefully, you can find happiness in other parts of your life even as you deal with missing your daughter.
I believe I got trapped years ago wanting to get away from her but easing away doing it nice, thinking about not hurting peoples feelings, it has gone on to wreck my life having a daughter who I love, now with a new family. I spend every day 13 years later thinking I messed up badly
Sean: Thanks for sharing your story. Hopefully it will help someone else. Unfortunately, you are in a bad situation in a marriage with someone who is dedicated to her manipulative patterns.
A polygraph doesn’t sound helpful. I have talked to many men in similar situations. I encourage you to get my book, Abuse OF Men BY Women: It Happens, It Hurts, And It’s Time to Get Real About It either on my website (https://annsilvers.com/collections/books/products/abuse-of-men-by-women-it-happens-it-hurts ) or from online retailers like Amazon ( https://www.amazon.com/Abuse-men-women-happens-hurts/dp/0983433879 .)
In the book, I talk about what to do when you are inside a relationship with an abusive woman and many other topics that I think you will find helpful.
Hi Ann,
Thank you for putting this together. I wish I had found this in 2008. I have always believed this happened to me. The following are the details, is there anything I can do to help protect myself, my children and bring her to justice? Polygraph?
I was ‘dating’ (if you want to call it that – sex and partying) a single mother that had a victim story about her, son and his father and I bought it. I fell in love with her son, but over time realized that she and I were very different and so was in the process of saving money to move out. A week before I was ready to go she told me she was pregnant. I asked what about the birth control and she informed me she had stopped taking it. Shocked and scared (26y/o), I didn’t know what to do so I proposed and almost sick to my stomach said “I do”. I did everything I could think of to provide, protect, pastor, love over the years – up to and including marriage counseling spending thousands, but she never engaged in any of it. Believing God to work a miracle in her heart and confess (and out of fear He may squish my soul if I divorced) I stayed with her and we now have two more children (a girl and two boys). However, she has done nothing but cause contention, be deceptive with finances and last year she out of the blue asked if I was the beneficiary for my parents’ assets. After I caught her layering financial transactions (essentially stealing money from our family) I confronted her and she apologized. I felt like she needed a skillset since being a SAHM for 10years and paid for her to
https://annsilvers.com/blogs/news/8-red-flags-the-pregnancy-is-a-trap
https://millenniallifecrisis.org/2019/11/25/getting-pregnant-to-trap-a-man-is-the-worst-idea-ever/
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