Positions For Threesome
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Positions For Threesome
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Zachary Zane
Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, and culture. He was formerly the digital associate editor at OUT Magazine and currently has a queer cannabis column, Puff Puff YASS, at Civilized.
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At some point in your life, you’ve likely fantasized about having a threesome. You’re not alone, my friend. When Men's Health advisory board member Justin Lehmiller, Ph.D., host of the Sex and Psychology Podcast , author of Tell Me What You Want , surveyed over 4,000 people on their sexual fantasies, he found that having a threesome is the most common sexual fantasy among Americans. Ninety-five percent of men and 87% of women said they had fantasized about sex with multiple partners.
We're here to talk about the best threesome sex positions—and we'll get there, we promise! But before you jump into bed with a third person, there are a few important threesome tips to keep in mind. First, if you’re still looking for a third, you should check out our list of the best threesome apps . (And don’t assume just because a woman is bisexual, she’ll want to have a threesome with you. Bi women are often harassed on dating apps, constantly asked if they’d be down to have a threesome, and they’re tired of it !)
Once you know who you'll be getting down with, you should talk to everyone involved before stripping naked, setting clear boundaries and clarifying expectations. Quite a few things can go wrong during a threesome , but by talking it out with all members beforehand, you'll up the chances of everyone coming away sexually satisfied.
Now, onto those threesome sex positions we promised! It can be complicated trying to fit everyone's bodies together. Six is a lot of limbs! That's why we're here to talk about the best threesome sex positions, including options for bi threesomes, where everyone is into each other, and "devil's" threesomes , where two of the participants aren't playing with each other.
So without further ado, here are 10 threesome sex positions that are super hot and totally doable. (For more sexy ways to switch up your bedroom routine, check out our list of the all-time best sex positions .)
How to do it: While one partner straddles your waist and junk in a traditional cowgirl position, the other straddles your face allowing you to go down on them.
Pro tip: The person sitting on your face can straddle you either way, but it’s typically better if they straddle you while facing the other partner, so they, too, can kiss and touch each other if they want.
How to do it: You’re the “caboose” of this train, penetrating your partner doggy style. The middle partner is then either digitally penetrating or eating out the head of the train, who’s also on their knees, bent forward in a classic doggy style position.
How to do it: Your two partners are on their knees in front of you, both blowing you at the same time.
Pro tip: It’s best if one blower focuses on you balls while the other focuses on your penis. Depending on if you’re into it, one partner could actually be on their knees, rimming you from behind while the other person goes down on you from the front.
How to do it: You’re having sex with the first partner doggy style. The third partner is lying on their back positioned in a manner that allows the middle person to go down on them.
How to do it: Everyone is lying on their sides in a circular position eating out/blowing one another.
Pro tip: I wouldn’t do this if the people you’re with aren’t roughly your size. If you’re a foot taller than the other partners, this may be difficult to navigate.
How to do it: The partner in the middle gets penetrated from behind and performs a BJ at the same time.
Pro tip: I'm personally not into touching both hands at the top to create the appearance of the Eiffel Tower, but if you feel the urge, I’m not going yuck your yum.
How to do it: One person lies on their back underneath the vulva-owning partner, who's also on their back. The other partner penetrates them in the missionary position.
Pro tip: Porn stars deserve a raise because they make this look so easy, when in fact, it’s quite difficult. But here are some tips that can help: Have the person with the bigger penis be in the backdoor, because the angle makes it’s more likely he’s going to slip out. Both penis-owners should not attempt to thrust at the same time, because if you do, one of you will slip out almost immediately.
How to do it: This is the same as the Doggy Deluxe, except with two penis-owners. One of them is having sex with the vulva-owning partner in doggy style. The other person lies on their back to easily receive oral.
How to do it: Everyone lies on their sides and penetrates the person in front of them either anally or vaginally.
Pro Tip: Really squish yourselves together for this position. If you have too much space between you, someone is going to slip out.
How to do it: It's like the 2009 horror movie...except actually good. In this position, all three people are on their knees, rimming the person in front of them.
Pro Tip: Despite the awful (but hilarious) name, this is amazing for guys who are into analingus. It’s also a great position to start in, because from there, it’s easy to seamlessly move into a number of the more penetrative sex positions listed above, like the Doggy Train or Doggy Deluxe.
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Paisley Gilmour
Sex & Relationships Editor
Paisley is sex & relationships editor at Cosmopolitan UK, and covers everything from sex toys, how to masturbate and sex positions, to all things LGBTQ.
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I wonder how The Tower Bridge got its name...
Having a threesome appears on so many people's sex bucket lists and in their sexual fantasies . And, according to a survey from Illicit Encounters, it is the third most common fantasy in the UK. So if a threesome is something you want to try - whether that's three strangers, as part of a couple with a third or 'unicorn', or if you're the individual joining another couple - here are some threesome positions to guide you. While enacting this fantasy IRL may not be possible right now due to the pandemic and depending on the restrictions where you live, a person can still dream/plan/have something to look forward to, right?!
These threesome sex positions work regardless of gender identity or sexuality. Penetrating partners can wear a strap-on dildo , and receiving partners can be penetrated anally, vaginally or orally.
"The Chain Link works because two levels of rear-entry penetration are more fun than one," says Jessica Leoni, sex and relationship expert at IllicitEncounters.com . "The penetration can be vaginal or anal, depending on your gender/anatomy breakdown and the preference of those involved."
The penetrating partner lies down on their back with their head resting on a pillow. "The first woman [or receiving partner] straddles them with their head pointed towards their partner's head and lowers themselves onto the penis/strap-on dildo," Jessica explains. "The second woman [or receiving partner] kneels over the penetrating partner's face with their head pointed towards their feet. The penetrating partner performs oral on them."
Jessica says this threesome position is great for intimacy because you are all close together and can all play. "The women [or two receiving partners] can kiss and touch each other while being simultaneously pleasured by the penetrating partner. Both have the option of turning around and facing the other direction for a different angle of stimulation."
"This is a great oral threesome position," Jessica says. "Each participant lies on their side with their face at their neighbour’s midriff, forming a circle or inter-connecting human daisy chain. Each person performs and receives oral sex at the same time."
The Tag Team is very simple to do and just requires the three of you to figure out who wants to receive and who wants to receive and give oral sex at the same time, Jessica explains.
Jessica says, "No prizes for guessing how the most popular threesome position got its name - the formation looks just like one of London’s most famous landmarks. The Tower Bridge is also known as the classic 'Spit Roast' where the woman [or receiving partner] is penetrated from behind while giving the second male [or penetrating partner] oral sex."
She adds, "You need to be careful with this one. The penetrating partner should not thrust too hard because that can impact on the person giving oral to the second penetrating partner".
"Lots of people get off on the idea of a threesome but would rather watch than actually join in. That is fine," she says. "Luckily, it can be fun to masturbate while the other two are having sex - so don’t forget that voyeurism IS participation. You can always take it in turns so another one of you becomes the voyeur by swapping positions."
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For many of us, threesomes are the kind of sexploits that only happen in the movies. But they don’t have to be permanently relegated to the realm of fantasy. With a little forethought and planning, you can make a three-way tryst a very sexy reality. Here's how.
If you're a single woman, Morse suggests dating sites, like Plenty of Fish , where couples may be looking for a third. The same goes for CraigsList—although she warns that you might find lots of weirdos, so you'll want to FaceTime or, better yet, meet them in a public place in person first. Other sites like FetLife and 3nder are also worth checking out. Another option is to go to your local sex toy store and talk to someone there, says Morse. You can ask the owners or clerks about what goes on in the community and probably find some fliers for parties or clubs.
Keep in mind that whether it's two women and a man or two men and a woman is entirely up to you as an individual or as a couple, although female-female-male is more common because guys tend to be less open-minded about including another man. That being said, a woman should never cave in just because her partner is pushing his preference. "It should never be a quid pro quo," says Morse. "You should want to do it."
Watch men and women spill the honest truth about exactly what they think about cheating:
If that goes well, then you can think about making a more direct ask. "Keep it light, and keep it fun," says Morse. A simple, "Hey, my partner and I think you're fun and you're cool. We want to have a threesome, and we think you'd be a good time. Is that something you'd be open to?" should do the trick. If you know the person, make it clear that you don't want the friendship to change. If it's a stranger or someone you connected with online, take some time to get to know each other first. Hang out to see if you're attracted to the person and could trust them.
But don't worry too much about making the big ask. The person on the receiving end will be flattered, no matter what.
(And don’t think making a certain activity off-limits will make your threesome worse, says Morse. "It can be really thrilling to have a threesome without penetration.")
If you’re in a relationship, you and your partner may also want to designate a safe word or phrase you can use in case things veer off course. "I need to get some water" or "I'm thirsty" are both good options. You should also tell the third person to speak up if he or she is ever uncomfortable.
Massage is also a great gateway to intimacy. Emily & Tony massage candles turn into a luxurious oil when blown out. You can use them to give a relaxing body rub that will seamlessly set the mood.
As for good positions to try, Morse suggests the guy lie on his back and enjoy oral sex from one woman while the other woman straddles his face so he can perform oral on her. Or have one woman lie on her back as the other woman lies on top of her. Then, the guy can enter the woman on top doggy style while the women touch one another. Another option: Arrange yourselves in a circle, and go down on each other.
"There are so many places to put our hands, our genitals, our mouths,” says Morse. “If you have a free hand or tongue, just get in there.”
If it ever seems like one party is left out, reach over and start playing with that person. This will help them get back in on the action.
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