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Experts say as social morales ease, more youths are trying anal sex .
Dec . 10, 2008 — -- Carry -- a Colorado college student who had been in a steady relationship for months -- was recently cajoled by her boyfriend into some sexual experimentation .
He wanted to try anal sex, and even though the 20-year-old said she was "OK with the idea," she nervously downed several drinks before their lovemaking began .
Within 15 seconds, Carry -- not her real name -- said she was "crying and asking him to stop ."
They never did it again . But experts say that as social mores ease, more young heterosexuals are engaging in anal sex, a behavior once rarely mentioned in polite circles . And the experimentation, they worry, may be linked to the current increase in sexually transmitted diseases .
Recently, researchers at the Bradley Hasbro Children's Research Center in Rhode Island suggested that anal sex is on the rise among teens and young adults, particularly those who have unprotected vaginal sex .
Experts say girls and young women like Carry are often persuaded to try such sexual behavior for the wrong reasons -- to please a partner, to have sex without the risk of pregnancy or to preserve their virginity . But many don't understand the health consequences .
"It really is shocking how many myths young people have about anal sex," said Judy Kuriansky, a Columbia University professor and author of "Sexuality Education: Past Present and Future ."
"They don't think you can get a disease from it because you're not having intercourse," she told ABCNews .com . "They can actually recite by rote how you get AIDS, but it doesn't transfer to their personal behavior ."
The study included a comprehensive questionnaire about adolescent sexual and other risk behaviors . The participants self-reported their answers, which scientists say can skew the results in this type of study . To compensate, researchers used audio computer-assisted self -interview technology, allowing participants to enter their responses directly into a computer, rather than having to report to an interviewer .
"Given the subject matter, it is likely that the numbers reported may actually be an underestimate of the prevalence of these behaviors," said Celia Lescano of Brown University, the Bradley Hasbro study's lead author .
More than one-third of new HIV infections in the United States occur among people between the ages of 13 and 29 and can be attributed to the mind-set among youth that they are not at risk of contracting the virus, according to the Kaiser Foundation .
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention also report that young women, especially those of minority races or ethnicities, are increasingly at risk for HIV infection through heterosexual contact . They are biologically vulnerable, don't recognize their partners' risk factors and are often unequal in relationships .
And when women engage in anal sex, tissue may tear, more readily causing direct blood exposure to infected fluids .
"There is no doubt that teens lack information about STDs and the safety of different behaviors and they they are engaging in more sexual experimentation," Lescano told ABCNews .com .
"That is why studies like these are so important to conduct," she said . "We need to know what teens do and do not know, what behaviors they are engaging in, and what information we need to provide to them so that they can make decisions that will help protect their sexual health ."
Even though the topic of anal sex is often considered taboo, Lescano urges "open discussion" of its consequences in doctor's offices, within sexual relationships and with parents .
Anecdotally, young adults confirm the reports of a rise in anal sex, including the perception that it is safe .
"I know some teens who did it just to try, and some who didn't have a condom available," said one 18-year-old Californian who did not want her name used .
"I think that it's less taboo simply because people are more open to trying new things," said her 23-year-old sister . "The younger crowd might be scared by the idea of getting pregnant, so they assume it's safer ."
"It takes a great amount of trust to try something new with somebody that you may or may not like," she said . "I'd consider it if there was a ring on my finger . Otherwise, I feel I'd be losing some of my dignity as a woman ."
One recent graduate of a New England college said one of her classmates was a "hard-core" Catholic who was rumored to have engaged in risky behavior .
"She only had anal sex with her boyfriend until they were married because that technically kept her a virgin," said the 25-year-old who wanted to remain anonymous .
Indeed, another well-publicized 2005 study using data from the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health found that teenagers who take "virginity pledges" were more likely to engage in oral or anal sex than nonpledging teens and less likely to use condoms once they became sexually active .
Conducted by researchers at Yale and Columbia universities, the study found that although teens who made the pledges had sex later than those who had not pledged and had fewer partners overall, both groups had similar rates of sexually transmitted diseases .
In the Hasbro study, females who had anal sex were more likely to be living with their partners, to have two or more sexual partners and to have previously experienced coerced intercourse . Males who engaged in this behavior were more likely to identify themselves as being homosexual, bisexual or undecided .
"These findings suggest that the factors associated with anal intercourse among females in the study relate to the context and power balance of sexual relationships," Lescano said . "We must teach teen girls and young women how to be assertive in sexual relationships, such as refusing unwanted sexual acts and negotiating for safer sex, whether it's anal or vaginal ."
Megan Carpentier, who writes about politics and women for Jezebel .com, said girls negotiating with boys for their attention is as old as time .
"Young women are concerned as much about being liked and loved as getting pleasure out of sex," Carpentier, 31, told ABCNews .com . "It certainly was going on when I was in high school: 'Do this if you love me .'"
"Putting it out there -- either oral or anal -- is not a consolation prize," she said . "You are giving up something ."
Carpentier said the dismantling of comprehensive sex education programs in the public schools is to blame for teen ignorance about the hazards of anal sex . And it is unrealistic to expect doctors to talk to teens about this touchy topic .
"How many times do teens go to a pediatrician, not a gynecologist?" she said . "And when I was 18, my mother was still in the room ."
According to the Journal of Adolescent Health, rising rates of anal sex among teens is reflected in the general adult population where anal sex rates have doubled since 1995 .
"Somewhere around 2004-2005 an overused, initially funny and hard-to-attribute quote proclaimed that 'anal sex is the new black,'" wrote sexuality educator Cory Silverberg on About .com .
Anal sex statistics indicate that a generational change has occurred, where people born in the 1980s and later may be more comfortable admitting to or showing interest in anal sex . Silverberg attributes interest in the behavior among heterosexuals, in part, to the proliferation of pornography in the 1990s .
"I have been having sex for only 12 years, so I don't know if it was just something I didn't talk about when younger," said Tracie Egan, 29, who writes about sex and pop culture for Jezebel .com .
As with other sex trends, girls are more open to experimentation because pornography has become so easily accessible on Web sites like XTube and YouPorn, she said .
"Porn makes people more adventurous with their sex acts," Egan said . "Anal sex is sort of always considered the last frontier, pushing the envelope ."
Raised in the 1990s, Egan was exposed to sex-laden MTV, documentaries on gay lifestyles and television shows like "Sex and the City ."
"We were raised in a different way," she said . Girls of her generation, the so-called third wave of feminism, she said, were able to have sex with multiple partners and could detach themselves "socially and emotionally ."
Still, Egan said that when she had anal sex with a boyfriend for the first time at 26, she was drunk, used no condom -- they were monogamous -- and didn't even know how to clean herself .
"Lack of sex education in school is really bothersome to me," she said . "Even I don't know about a lot of the biological issues ."
Columbia's Kuriansky, author of "Generation Sex," has been hearing questions about anal sex from her college students for at least a decade . "Is anything wrong with having anal sex?" is the most common one .
"No," she tells them . "Except if you're forced into it or can't enjoy sex any other way ."
Another question she often hears is: "If I want it, or like it, does it mean I'm gay?"
What's changed in this decade is girls are now expressing an interest . "On college campuses it's escalated," Kuriansky said . "There's more talk, more books, more videos ."
One speaker on the college circuit -- Tristan Taormino, author of "The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women" -- is gaining new ground with young women .
But, Kuriansky said, with fewer educational media outlets and less sex education, young girls are clueless about hygiene, possible bladder or vaginal infections and life-threatening diseases like AIDS .
"We are more open, but there's less information," Kuriansky said . "There are real myths and real efforts to be cool and people running around saying how great it is ."
"But it's not just rubbing elbows," she said . "Anal sex is a serious public problem ."
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I am considering trying anal for the first time . My boyfriend of 2 years (we're both 17) and I have been tossing the idea around for a while, but first, I have a few questions!
C'mon, its my BUTT . Will anal smell nasty? Will my bf end up getting crap on his penis? (Ew .) I've also heard you can really mess yourself up like this . . . like . . . having the squirts for a while and such . Last question! why are guys so intrigued by this anal fad? It's my bum!! I'm trying to have an open mind, because maybe, just MAYBE this could be something I'll enjoy . . . but seriously - what is so appealing about being up my ass? I just dont want to get into something i'm not sure about! (Hence the reason i'm asking lots of questions .) Help!
P .S . We are not considering anal as an alternative to vaginal intercourse . neither of us are avoiding sex because we are virgins; we lost it to each other . (We're still planning on using a condom with anal though . . . yuckie . . .)
originally written 06 .10 .2007 • updated 12 .14 .2021 •
Happy birthday, Scarleteen! We're 23!
I think it's sage to listen to yourself when you say that maybe you don't want to get into something you're both not sure about and are not sure you'll like . If only one partner has any interest in doing an activity, and the other either has none, or is opposed to it, it's generally best to just decline .
Starting anal play with penis -to- anus intercourse full-stop isn't the best idea, anyway, on both those counts and more .
So, for starters, to figure out if you even have any interest in this yourself, and enjoy this at all, rather than starting with something so much larger -- and in some ways, less easy to control -- instead, if you (emphasis on YOU) want to experiment with anal play, the way to start is with something much smaller and more gradual, like his or your own gloved, lubed pinky finger . If playing like that isn't compelling for you both, or if that doesn't feel good, anal intercourse isn't likely to feel good either .
That said, here's the lowdown on your other questions here:
Smells/Feces : The anus and rectum aren't the bowel, where feces is stored . They're passages through which fecal matter passes . So, while there can be trace amounts of feces in there, and yes, that may have a scent, that's all that's there . And yes, some of those traces may sometimes show up on a condom /penis/fingers/toys when engaging in anal play . Consider it about the same level of matter/scent that you'd find when you have intercourse at the very end of your menstrual period .
Damage/Injury : Gradual, mindful anal sex of any kind should not, and usually does not, cause injury . What does that mean? Well, for starters, it means always always using plenty of latex-safe lubricant and a latex barrier with anal play -- anal sex of any kind carries STI risks at the level vaginal intercourse does, as well as additional bacterial infection risks, and the anus and rectum don't self-lubricate like the vagina does, so both are vital to safe play with such delicate tissue . That also includes never going back and forth between anal intercourse and vaginal intercourse with the same condom, hand, or unwashed/uncovered toy: if you're ever going to do that, each activity needs a new barrier . Using a condom with anal sex isn't about putting a barrier up because the anus and rectum are gross: it's important to keep everyone healthy .
That also means a partner (or yourself, if you're adding anal stimulus to masturbation ), being very slow and very gradual with any kind of anal sex . Like the vagina -- but often even more noticeable sometimes because it's a tighter orifice -- someone playing with someone else's anus can often feel the anus sort of open up and pull whatever is going inside it in in small increments, and they should go with that flow: forcing anything into the anus roughly can cause fissures and injury . But to toss some mythos aside, because -- again -- the anus and rectum aren't the bowel, anal sex can't and doesn't cause bowel problems .
Appeal of Anal Sex : Lately, it's pretty clear that teenage and college age men and boys wanting to engage in non-receptive (as in, not them receiving -- more on that in a sec) anal sex is most likely just because it's something seen in porn a lot, and also because it's seen as a sort of acceptable kink, much like occurred with oral sex a couple decades ago .
For some, there's also an element of power or even social status in it, as in, my girlfriend LET me do this thing to her (sometimes -- but not always -- with the affixed notion that she let them do something she doesn't even like) . But for others, it may just be a curiosity about yet another way to have sex, the same way anyone is curious about the multitude of ways to be sexual . Some people have interest because of the "ew" factor you're having right now: because it's somewhat taboo, or because the assumed "dirtiness" of it is sexy to them . For those who have engaged in it before and want to again, it may be about enjoying that particular sensation: the anus tends to have a tighter "grip" than the vagina because it is a smaller orifice .
And some people with vaginas DO enjoy receptive anal intercourse, even though they, unlike people with penises, don't have a prostate gland tucked in there (the prostate is the equivalent to the g-spot) to really up the ante . Because people with penises DO have that, one suggestion I often make to cis women with cis male partners who want to try anal play -- if you're interested - is to suggest to the male partner that you BOTH try it . Not as a "if you do this awful thing to me, you're getting it, too, " but because sometimes men are interested in anal sex because they enjoy their OWN anuses, and because they are ashamed or afraid to ask for THAT play, receptively, for themselves . Also, because it usually IS very enjoyable for most people with penises, and because it's always a plus with any sexual activity when partners have the same bits to learn about, and when any given person can be (and want to be) both giver and receiver, it makes for a pretty great learning curve: people with penises who have also been on the receiving end tend to have a much better idea of how sensitive the anus and rectum can be, of what can feel good and what just plain hurts, and tend to be more patient, gentle partners when their partners are receiving .
If you ARE interested, for yourself, in some anal play, start slow and see if you even like anal stimulus in general before pulling out the big guns, as it were .
And if you find you aren't, or you just don't even have that interest at all, then it's no big deal to have any given sexual thing that just isn't something you want to do: most partners you'll have will have at least one thing they don't want to do, too .
Information on this site is provided for educational purposes . It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional . The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication . You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition .
© 1998 - 2022 Scarleteen/Heather Corinna . All Rights Reserved . | Privacy Policy & User Guidelines
Part of HuffPost News . ©2022 BuzzFeed, Inc . All rights reserved .
01/06/2012 04:29pm EST | Updated February 2, 2016
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Though its practice is frequently assumed to be confined to the gay male population, anal intercourse appears to be more popular than possibly expected among heterosexual couples under 45, according to a Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) report .
The report, titled " Sexual Behavior, Sexual Attraction and Sexual Identity in the United States ," which reportedly polled thousands of people between the ages of 15 and 44 from 2006 through 2008, found that 44 percent of straight men and 36 percent of straight women admitted to having had anal sex at least once in their lives .
When it came to experimenting with same-sex love, however, women were considerably more fluid: 12 percent said they'd had sex with another woman, compared to a mere 5 .8 percent of men . Of course, as The New Civil Rights Movement notes, it's possible that the rates for heterosexual men and women experiencing anal sex as well as those experimenting with same-sex partners may actually be slightly higher in 2012 .
There have been several published theories as to the reason for a rise in popularity (and we can hopefully assume it's not an increase in the number of people Googling Rick Santorum ) . A Dec . 22, 2011 piece by Hugo Schwyzer , a professor of gender studies and history at Pasadena City College, implied that anal sex (which he calls "the most selfless of common sexual acts" given the amount of pain the "bottoming" partner endures in its practice) could be on the rise due to its frequent appearance in both heterosexual porn and mainstream media as well as an increased pressure from heterosexual male partners . He also cited several sources who seemed to cast doubt on how pleasurable the act was for women .
Though there's no telling what he'd say about the implications of the practice between heterosexual partners, Paul Angelo, a Miami-based "gay matchmaker," reportedly called for a 60-day moratorium on anal sex among gay couples last month, saying the act diminishes self-confidence and self-esteem while causing relationship confusion among partners . "The worse part about this destruction of self-esteem is that it's on the subconscious level . A person will not feel anything during the act," he writes . "And the pleasure derived from the act will override the logic necessary to correct the behavior . In addition, there is a delay between the act of anal intercourse and the reduction of self-esteem of the person ."
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