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“Since then, our relationship as father and son has blossomed into something more beautiful than anything I could have ever imagined.”
This article contains affiliate links. Fight the New Drug may receive financial support from purchases made using affiliate links.
Many people contact Fight the New Drug to share their personal stories about how porn has affected their life or the life of a loved one. We consider these personal accounts very valuable because, while the science and research is powerful within its own right, personal accounts from real people seem to really hit home about the damage that pornography does to real lives.
In our digitized world, it’s not a question of if kids will access porn, but when .
It’s a sad fact, but parents can be ready for when it happens. This end of post is by our affiliate partners at Bark, who have amazing tech solutions for monitoring devices while building trust— read on for more info .
My son came forward on his own about six weeks ago pleading…begging…to “make it stop Daddy!”
His “friend” introduced him to porn videos and even knew when to “shut it off” before his Mom made her way down the hall to “check on them.”
We find ourselves lucky and even grateful because he came to us…we didn’t have to catch him. Truth is he showed ZERO signs that anything was off, so had he not come forward, I don’t think we would have ever known! He hid his pain well.
That said… your little angel you think isn’t struggling probably is, or has some heavy thoughts, images, and emotions they don’t quite know how to process.
Now, that’s not always the case for most kids, so if you catch your kid in the act, pull them aside lovingly. They’re in enough pain—believe it or not—already, and it’s killing them inside despite what you might think. As enticing as porn is, they want out. They don’t know how to break the barriers of shame, guilt, and embarrassment. It’s too much for their minds to handle between the ages of five and 17 years old, in my opinion. My son is ten years old, and his battle is fierce.
Since then, our relationship as father and son has blossomed into something more beautiful than anything I could have ever imagined. In our first big talk, I explained to him that when an alcoholic seeks help to stop alcoholism, they find a sponsor, a life coach. I said, “Son, what if I was your sponsor. Your life coach?” He replied, “Yes, Daddy, I want you as my sponsor.”
For the last six weeks or more, we have been “cleaning out the closet” every morning or evening for about an hour. We talk about anything he wants. It mostly boils down to understanding just how normal he actually is for the thoughts, images, and feelings that have been provoked due to the introduction of porn and understanding where to draw the line and where there is personal accountability. There is no shame, here, only love and honesty.
We talk about anything and everything you can imagine now in a way that builds confidence again, self-respect, self-awareness, self-care, and self-love.
Our talks will continue daily and it’s no longer awkward to talk about sex. It’s just a normal conversation between father and son. He knows that because porn opened his eyes to a world he wishes didn’t exist, he knows it’s his battle for the rest of his life—to choose in or out—and he’s accepted that challenge.
His healing process has been amazing. Heartbreaking, but amazing.
Whether we like it or not, children today will be exposed to pornography. It’s not a matter of if , but when . Preparing yourself now instead of waiting until it happens will help you get ahead of the situation. And remember,
One resource that can help? Introducing Bark, advanced monitoring software that helps parents understand what their children are talking about online with their friends and posting across social media. After all, as a busy parent, reading every text message, post, and email just isn’t realistic.
Bark was created by parents, for parents to offer a better, easier, and more effective way to keep children safe online. With it, you receive alerts when potentially harmful or dangerous issues arise and links to resources to help you naturally bring up conversations in response.
Created in collaboration with child psychologists, youth advisors, digital media experts, and law enforcement professionals, Bark delivers a research-backed, kid-friendly solution for safeguarding families as technology changes how and where we communicate. Over 3,000,000 homes and schools are using it now.
We’ve partnered with FTND to offer a free, one-month trial for interested parents. Check it out, and keep your family safe, today.
Matt McKee is Vice President of Strategic Partnerships at Bark , and the author of Parent Chat: The Technology Talk for Every Family . He’s passionate about helping families navigate the world of technology, and enabling kids to thrive throughout a digital adolescence.
Are you with us? Join the movement!
©Fight the New Drug, Inc. 2021, All rights Reserved. Fight the New Drug, Inc. is a US 501(c)(3) public charity, EIN 26-3550143.
The smart way to keep kids safer online.
Quit porn for good with science-based support.


08 Aug 2018 01:03PM
(Updated: 03 Feb 2021 05:22PM)

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SINGAPORE: A 17-year-old boy who had sex with his younger sister after frequenting pornographic websites was on Wednesday (Aug 8) sentenced to 21 months' probation and 180 hours of community service.
The teenager - who cannot be named to protect the identity of the victim - sexually assaulted his sister in 2013, when she was 10. The boy was 12 years old at the time of the crime.
The court heard that the boy was exposed to pornography in 2013. Although he was initially disgusted by it, he soon became more interested and began surfing pornographic websites, court documents said. He eventually felt the urge to simulate what he saw on those websites.
In September 2013, the boy became aroused after watching a television show with a bedroom scene.
He summoned his sister, who was alone with him in the flat, and told her he wanted to "try something with her". 
He threatened to tell their parents about her mobile phone usage if she did not comply. He proceeded to penetrate her without a condom, stopping only when she complained of pain.
Their parents subsequently found out that the boy had touched his sister’s private parts on several occasions. They did not lodge a police report, but since 2014, both children had been seeing a counsellor from the Counselling and Care Centre. 
BOY MOVED TO STAY WITH GRANDPARENTS
Arrangements were also made for the boy to move to his grandparents’ home so as to keep him away from his sister. After six months of counselling, he was assessed to have reintegrated well and allowed to move back home.
However, in August 2016, the boy started watching pornography again "due to the stress he felt over his studies". He asked his sister, then 13, into his bedroom and molested her.
That same month, his mother told the counsellor that her son had continued to commit sexual offences against her daughter.
The matter was referred to the Child Protective Service of the Ministry of Social and Family Development, and a police report was made in April 2017.
The boy pleaded guilty in June to one charge of sexual penetration of a minor under 16 and one charge of outrage of modesty.
Six other charges of molesting and having sex with his sister were taken into consideration for sentencing.
PROSECUTOR ASKS JUDGE NOT TO ALLOW ACCUSED TO STAY IN HOME WITH YOUNG GIRLS
District Judge May Mesenas sentenced the teenager to 21 months' probation. He also has to perform 180 hours of community service and undergo counselling and psychological treatment.
Additionally, an Internet filter service must be installed on mobile communication devices used by the accused, so as to allow his parents to monitor his Internet usage.
Deputy Public Prosecutor Marshall Lim also asked the judge to include in the court order that the boy should not live in a household with any females under the age of 16.
"The offences he committed against his sister - she was a ready and available target," said Mr Lim. "We have to cut off the availability of any victims for him to prey on."
The judge agreed. She also ordered that any future contact between the teenager and his sister be supervised by an adult.
When asked if he had anything to say, the accused, who was unrepresented, said he was very regretful and asked for a second chance.
"Do you really understand and treasure this chance? Because you have committed a very serious offence against your only sister, your younger sister, and threatened her," said the judge. "I really hope that she can heal from this. The parents are in a most difficult situation."
Speaking to the boy's parents, the judge said that they would need to go for counselling as a family.
Turning to the boy, she said: "You have to respect women. And I think you have to respect your mother as well, (judging from) the way you speak to her."
For sexual penetration of a minor under 16, the teenager could have been jailed up to 20 years and fined or caned.
For molesting his sister, he could have been jailed for up to five years, fined, caned, or given any combination of these punishments.

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https://fightthenewdrug.org/my-10-year-old-son-confessed-to-watching-porn/
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