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As we’ve previously noted , it’s difficult to get consistent answers on the alleged dangers of pornography. Scientific research on the subject varies widely.
It’s safe to say that Kevin Majeres, a psychiatrist specializing in cognitive-behavioral therapy and a faculty member of Harvard Medical School, is among those who view pornography as harmful.
Writing on the blog Purity is Possible , Majeres explains how the brain works and what happens to the brain during repeated exposure to pornography. He begins with mating patterns discovered in rats:
Scientists have discovered that if you place a male rat in a cage with a receptive female, they will mate; but once done, the male rat will not mate more times, even if the female is still receptive. He loses all sexual interest. But if, right after he finishes with the first female, you put in a second receptive female, he will immediately mate again; and again a third, and so on, until he nearly dies. This effect has been found in every animal studied. This is called the Coolidge effect.
Okay. The stuff about the rats having sex is disgusting and a little creepy. But what does that have to do with us?
Pornography’s power comes from the way it tricks the man’s lower brain; one of the drawbacks of this region is that it can’t tell the difference between an image and reality. Pornography offers a man an unlimited number of seemingly willing females; every time he sees the new partner, with each click, it gears up his sex drive again.
The brain hack thing is definitely creepy, still not exactly terrifying though. But take a look at Majeres has to say about dopamine.
Dopamine is the drug of desire – when you see something desirable, your brain pours out dopamine, saying “Go for it! Do whatever it takes!” Dopamine fixes your attention on that desirable object, giving you your power of concentration…
So when someone clicks and sees a new pornographic image, his lower brain thinks this is the real thing, this is the lady he must win over with all his might, and so he gets an enormous dopamine flood in his upper brain, causing a wild amount of electrical energy.
This first exposure to a new female who is a potential mate wasn’t something that happened a lot to our ancestors; maybe only once in their lives; so the brain thinks this is a big deal. It doesn’t know that now the game has completely changed: it doesn’t understand that these are virtual females only; so with each new one it causes another flood of dopamine, time after time, click after click, as long as he continues. It’s a dopamine binge.
I’m not a scientist. But this is beginning to sound, er, not healthy. Majeres continues:
This is why pornography causes a vicious circle. When someone views pornography, he gets overstimulated by dopamine; so his brain destroys some dopamine receptors. This makes him feel depleted, so he goes back to pornography, but, having fewer dopamine receptors, this time it requires more to get the same dopamine thrill; but this causes his brain to destroy more receptors; so he feels an even greater need for pornography to stimulate him.
So as guys keep gaming the dopamine system, they start to find that they have to use pornography for longer and longer periods to have the same effect, and they have to visit more and more sites.
But even more porn sites eventually don’t cut it. What then?
You have to stimulate another emotion: fear or disgust or shock or surprise. For porn use, you need to start moving to kinkier things, things that make you afraid or make you feel a bit sick; and so you start experimenting with various perversions.
I recommend Majeres’ article in full. The science may yet be unclear on the physical side effects of porn, but he makes a strong case, at the very least, that pornography is 1) highly addictive 2) harmful to relationships.
Regardless of how one feels on the morality of pornography, those reasons alone—if one values self-control and healthy relationships—should cause alarm.
Jon Miltimore is the Senior Editor of Intellectual Takeout . Follow him on Facebook .
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https://www.elmbrookcenter.org/about-elmbrook/ Science or religion ??? I report , you decide .
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Much like your love life doesn’t resemble a Nicholas Sparks movie, your sex life is probably a far cry from what you see in porn. And while it’s fine to use it to help spice things up—both solo and with your partner—it’s crucial to remember that these X-rated clips aren’t the real deal. Check out some of the most unlikely, unrealistic, and sometimes laughable sexpectations we get from porn below!
1. Everyone has an orgasm…every time.
So you don’t always climax, and that’s totally fine. You can still have awesome sex without an orgasm. But if you’re looking to up your chances, try these positions that practically guarantee an orgasm .
2. You always clock at least 30 scripted minutes in bed.
Hey, quickies happen, and they can be great. Other times, you may keep the action going for hours. As long as your needs are being met, who needs a time frame?
3. You’re perfectly groomed below the belt before every single hookup.
Unless you’ve got a waxing specialist on standby, you’re probably not super-smooth all month long. Plus, we’re willing to bet you don’t let a few stray hairs stand in the way of a good time.
4. And your guy’s skin is as smooth and soft as Channing Tatum’s.
Manscaping may be required in porn, but it’s not always the norm in real life.
5. Missionary is out. Whips and chains are in.
We’re all for experimenting in bed, but that doesn’t mean you need to try something new every single night. Porn tends to hint that ‘vanilla sex’ is bad and that you need to be wild and crazy all the time, says sex therapist Brandy Engler, Ph.D., author of The Men on My Couch . The bottom line: Do what feels good.
6. Who needs condoms when his biceps are that huge!?
The guy might look like Ryan Gosling and have a list of reasons why protection isn’t necessary, but you should never have sex with a stranger without a condom. Plus, they’re not all that bad, we promise.
7. Your reactions are always Oscar-worthy in bed.
When something feels good, definitely let your partner know. But that doesn’t mean moaning so loud your neighbors hear it. Women tend to see things in porn they think they need to mimic, “like false or over-exaggerated enthusiasm instead of just your natural response,” says Engler. Don’t go overboard—your partner will see right through it.
8. Every guy you sleep with will be very well endowed.
So this is why guys are so concerned about their penis sizes. And even though a recent study found that some women have an easier time climaxing with a bigger guy, it’s definitely not a requirement for great sex. In fact, experts say that your connection with your partner is a much bigger factor.
9. You never have sex on your period…period.
In porn world, period sex just isn’t on the agenda. But a recent MensHealth.com survey found that more than three-quarters of guys say they’re down for it. If you’re in, here are the tips and positions to make it even better .
10. Having a mid-day hookup at the office is totally acceptable.
What soundproof office building do these people work in? (See also: having sex in a restaurant, park, or gym.) Use these tips for out-of-the-bedroom sex ideas that won’t get you arrested.
11. Uncircumcised guys are a thing of the past.
You may not see it on screen, but there are still a ton of guys sporting penis sleeves. Here’s what you need to know about sex with an uncircumcised guy .
12. Every guy wants to have a threesome/role play/dominate you/etc.
Just like you’re not into everything you see online, your guy isn’t either, says Engler. So don’t assume he wants to act out every fantasy listed in his browser history.
13. What a coincidence—you both want to have sex all the time.
There are a number of reasons you’re just not in the mood. And a ton of men have issues with erectile dysfunction—even guys under 40. So don’t worry if one or both of you isn’t raring to go 24/7. That’s normal!
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More stories to check out before you go
These 3 Zodiac Signs Are Feeling Extremely Powerful...
Mars Retrograde Will Force These 4 Zodiac Signs to...
Who Were You In a Past Life? Here's What Your South...
Here's the “Halloweentown” Character You Are, According...
Your Tarot Horoscope Says You're Ready to Party, But...
Much like your love life doesn’t resemble a Nicholas Sparks movie, your sex life is probably a far cry from what you see in porn. And while it’s fine to use it to help spice things up—both solo and with your partner—it’s crucial to remember that these X-rated clips aren’t the real deal. Check out some of the most unlikely, unrealistic, and sometimes laughable sexpectations we get from porn below!
1. Everyone has an orgasm…every time.
So you don’t always climax, and that’s totally fine. You can still have awesome sex without an orgasm. But if you’re looking to up your chances, try these positions that practically guarantee an orgasm .
2. You always clock at least 30 scripted minutes in bed.
Hey, quickies happen, and they can be great. Other times, you may keep the action going for hours. As long as your needs are being met, who needs a time frame?
3. You’re perfectly groomed below the belt before every single hookup.
Unless you’ve got a waxing specialist on standby, you’re probably not super-smooth all month long. Plus, we’re willing to bet you don’t let a few stray hairs stand in the way of a good time.
4. And your guy’s skin is as smooth and soft as Channing Tatum’s.
Manscaping may be required in porn, but it’s not always the norm in real life.
5. Missionary is out. Whips and chains are in.
We’re all for experimenting in bed, but that doesn’t mean you need to try something new every single night. Porn tends to hint that ‘vanilla sex’ is bad and that you need to be wild and crazy all the time, says sex therapist Brandy Engler, Ph.D., author of The Men on My Couch . The bottom line: Do what feels good.
6. Who needs condoms when his biceps are that huge!?
The guy might look like Ryan Gosling and have a list of reasons why protection isn’t necessary, but you should never have sex with a stranger without a condom. Plus, they’re not all that bad, we promise.
7. Your reactions are always Oscar-worthy in bed.
When something feels good, definitely let your partner know. But that doesn’t mean moaning so loud your neighbors hear it. Women tend to see things in porn they think they need to mimic, “like false or over-exaggerated enthusiasm instead of just your natural response,” says Engler. Don’t go overboard—your partner will see right through it.
8. Every guy you sleep with will be very well endowed.
So this is why guys are so concerned about their penis sizes. And even t
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