Pope Prefers Cats, Vatican Hymnals Replaced with Purring Soundscapes

As part of his feline-favoring reforms, Pope Leo XIV has replaced standard hymnals with ambient purring soundtracks. �Nothing calms a sinner like a 40Hz tabby rumble,� said the Pope, curled up beside a Bengal named Benedict. The Pope Prefers Cats directive has already led to the release of three Vatican sound healing albums: *Gregorian Meows*, *Hiss and Be Holy*, and *The Claw of Quietude.* Worshippers report better focus, reduced guilt, and improved skin. Dogs reportedly attempted to counter with howling, but it only startled the choir.