Pooped Panty

Pooped Panty
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So You Pooped Your Pants: 7 Steps to Cleaning Up You just shat yourself - don't worry, we've all been there before.
by KC Jayfree | May 12, 2011
Points in Case is a daily literary humor publication featuring enlightening and irreverent comedy from seasoned writers and fresh voices, since 1999.
E ven though nobody is going to admit it, we've all been there. Maybe you're alone, in class, or on national television; maybe you thought there'd be enough time to run to the crapper; or maybe you deemed that fart “safe.” Unfortunately for you, your underpants (if you're wearing them), and those around you (if there are people around), you just shat yourself.
You may not need this guide right now, but you will later. So take note. Maybe even bookmark it. But listen and learn, people.

Uhoh, that's not a lumpy wallet… This is beyond important. Sometimes, a fart turns into a shit. Sometimes something that FEELS like a slimy turd is just a horrifically vile cloud of gas that SEEMS to be either solid or liquid. You need to be sure, because hopefully, this is a no-shit situation.

You can have your shame, just don't eat it too. Understandably, you feel embarrassed. Only babies, old people, Michael Moore, Internet trolls , and Jersey Shore cast members doodoo in their drawers. And now you're included in that list.
Now that you're finished shaming yourself, take off your soiled underroos. Actually, if you still want to shame yourself, go ahead. I mean, who the fuck craps their pants? Gross!
Some people zip past this stage, others take their time. I prefer to use a case-by-case basis. You've got big questions to ask yourself, starting with, “Should I throw out these underwear or not?”

JUST A WEDGIE, NOTHING TO SEE HERE. Female readers may be wondering, “Hmm, the glorious KC Freeman didn't say anything about if I, a woman, brown myself.” That's true, but as everybody knows, girls don't poop, so there's no logical reason to believe they could actually poop themselves. I hope I cleared that up.
Now you need to find out WHY you shit your pants, and HOW you can avoid this tragedy yet again. Because if we don't learn from our messy, poop-related mistakes, we're bound to make them again. And let me tell you, that's a lesson best learned once—one which saves you from buying underwear all the time.
You've finally de-shitted yourself. Now you need to come up with a great reason why you promptly left your girlfriend's mother's funeral, your class, your office job, or your dentist appointment.
You're probably still weirded out that you crapped while standing. It's okay, it happens to the best of us. Even Obama, Babe Ruth, Ted Koppel, Kanye, Kenny Rogers, Barbara Streisand and “The Macho Man” Randy Savage all pooped their pants at one time or another. You're going to be alright.
Sometimes, all the care in the world won't stop you from crapping yourself. In that case, you can buy those adult diapers. They work really well and are fashionable and comfortable to boot. Plus, you can wash them after you poop in them, kind of like underwear.
So, good luck to you all. Make sure you email this guide to anybody you think has shit themselves or will shit themselves in the future. Use this article as a finger to the nose and show that person, “I'm so much better than you. I don't poop my pants like you do.”
ENDNOTE 1: Or you can do what I did: print this article and put it into the backpack of every dude with a hot girlfriend. Then text, Facebook, or tell the girlfriend, “Your boyfriend was walking weird. Do you think he's into guy-on-guy anal, or did he shit himself?” Then point to this very article and convince her to dump him for you.
ENDNOTE 2: If you do this endnote thing, make sure you use a scissors and cut off the endnote part. You don't want the girl to know that you've framed her boyfriend. Or for the boyfriend to discover your evil plot.
ENDNOTE 3: I've since reread this piece, and realized that it may come across like I've actually crapped my pants past the age of 17 (like normal people), but that's simply not true. I've never pooped my butt. Ever.
KC was born in Oregon, raised in the Dakotas, educated in Colorado, groomed in NYC, and now teaches in Seoul, South Korea. He misses sleeping until noon, drinking nightly, and... See full profile »
Once I get to the income bracket where tax evasion seems like a feasible idea, that’s when I know I’ve made it.

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anyone want to chat or have a groupchat to talk about pantypooping?
Story and some notes from my last mess (22F)
anyone want to share pantypooping fantasies?
Any girls that live close to Kentucky
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Looking for someone to do a panty poop ddlg roleplay with me, I'll be playing the little, dm for plot.
Heyooo just a few notes and story about this mess.
So yes, these are boxer briefs, and no, I’m not a man. If you’ve been following my on here for a while you’ll know that I usually poop in male underwear, but recently I’ve admitted to myself that I really enjoy crossdressing. I have for years now but I didn’t really think about it too much. I like wearing men’s underwear, shirts, pants, etc. I do still enjoy dressing more feminine from time to time, but not as often. So anyways, onto how this mess happened. I’ve been rather sick lately and while I was watching TV the urge to fart came along, so I pushed a few out. They were loud, but short and airy. I didn’t think much of it, but when I sneezed a few moments after I felt a bit of liquid shit force its way out of me. I quickly got up and went to the bathroom, but I thought “fuck it, I’m already horny, I’ve already got poop in my pants, might as well finish the job”, so I hopped into the bathtub and let loose. I first felt a bit more fudge pour out of me before a much more solid bit (which you may be able to spot in the second picture) plopped out, followed by lots of diarrhea which sprayed out and mostly fell out of my pants and into the hot tub. Oh boooy being sick never felt so good. While most of the mess fell out, my underwear was still pretty coated in crap, so I did have to throw them out.
That’s it for this mess, but I do have a bit more to add unrelated to that.
First of all, was there ever another panty pooping Reddit that got deleted? I remember having a lot more posts but they seem to have disappeared, which is a shame because there were pictures of some of my messes that I won’t be able to get back now.
Additionally, and it’s annoying really that I have to say this, please do not ask for pictures of me or “suggest” that I post them. I get very turned on by shitting myself, and very turned on by the thought of others enjoying my messes. However, the thought of strangers on the internet seeing my body does not arouse me and makes me pretty uncomfortable, so I don’t think I’ll ever be revealing my body or showing pictures of my messy underwear while it’s still on.
If you’ve read all this, thank you so much, and I hope you enjoy the mess I made!
It's about time-I shat something firm, for a change.

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