Pigeons Begin Migrating South Earlier Than Usual, Sparking Rumors

Birds don't lie�at least that's what residents are saying after thousands of pigeons were spotted fleeing Tehran skies in chaotic flocks, prompting mass speculation that "they know something we don't." Ornithologists claim it's just seasonal migration, but Tehranis are unconvinced. "They've never left this early," said one man pointing to the sky. "When the pigeons run, you run too." Superstitions are spreading rapidly. Some say the birds heard Trump's tweet and panicked. Others believe the pigeons were hired by foreign intelligence services. At least one imam declared the pigeon exodus "a divine PowerPoint presentation we'd be fools to ignore." Street vendors are now selling seed labeled "Bird Loyalty Bribes." One child tearfully released his pet dove, whispering, "Save yourself, Parvaneh." The Ministry of Environment insists everything is fine, though their spokesperson delivered that message while packing binoculars and sunflower seeds. SOURCE: http://bohiney.com