Phone Sex With Real People

Phone Sex With Real People
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Set up a phone date. While it's true that, as with any other kind of sex, phone sex can "just happen", the session is more likely to go well if you've planned ahead, especially if it's your first time doing it together.

Pick a time when you're both alone and free to let your inhibitions loose . Your plan won’t work if you're rolling around in bed, feeling hot and heavy, while your partner is shivering in the rain outside the library.
If your partner is new to phone sex or feeling unsure, consider sending them this article, or reading it together.
Don't forget that you can always discuss what you'd like to do during phone sex before you start.

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Let loose and get in the mood . It will be difficult for you to enjoy yourself if you feel tense or silly, so before you call, do whatever you need to do to get yourself comfortable and feeling sexy.

Let loose: Lie in bed for a while, browse the internet, have a glass of wine , jog on the spot, do a silly song and dance in front of the mirror -- anything that will allow you to release the tension from your body.

Get in the mood: Setting up a sexy atmosphere can help put you in the right frame of mind, so consider doing whatever you'd do to prepare for any other kind of sex. Here are some ideas:

Tidy up your room and make the bed

Dim the lights, perhaps set up some candles
Play soft music

Have a bath or shower (and a shave, if you like)
Think of a role play to spice up the call (you two skinny dipping, etc.) [1]
X
Expert Source

Nicole Moore Love & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.

Put on (or take off!) your favorite, sexiest clothes, and underwear
Set out some sex toys
Turn yourself on by gently caressing your body, or thinking about your lover, or imagining sexual encounters you've had or would like to have... but don't let yourself get too turned on just yet -- that's what the phone call is for!

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Begin the call. Once you have your partner on the phone, take things at a speed you're both comfortable with. There's no "correct" way to have phone sex.

If it helps you relax, spend a few minutes chatting before you get started... just don't let yourselves get distracted from your sexy goal.
A low, soft tone of voice or heavy breathing can help set the mood, but don't force it if doing so is unnatural for you: speaking and breathing comfortably in your normal tone of voice will be sexier than an awkwardly forced attempt at sounding sexy.

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Introduce a casual topic that will segue nicely into sexy talk. Getting started is possibly the hardest part, especially if it's your first time! Pick a topic that's easy for you to bring up, but which has the potential to spiral into steamier territory. Examples:

How much you miss them, or wish they were with you
What you would like to do if they were with you
What you're wearing and how you look in it
What you're doing
How you're feeling
Ask your partner to describe any of the above to you

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Escalate into sexy talk. Once you have the ball rolling and you're feeling comfortable, try getting bolder with your descriptions, or bring up new, sexier topics. A good approach is to describe or ask your partner to describe, the following three things:

What you're doing : Describe how you look and the way you're touching yourself. Be as coy or as raunchy as you like!

Ask for "advice" -- for example, "should I start playing with my underwear?"
Tell them what you'd like them to do if they're willing.
Don't feel bad if you're not comfortable with touching yourself -- you can still let them know that you're enjoying simply listening to them.

What you're imagining : This could be, for example, what you'd like to be doing with your partner, a moment from great sex the two of you have had in the past, or a mental image of what they're describing to you. [2]
X
Expert Source

Nicole Moore Love & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.

You might want to start out slow: begin with tame descriptions like "first, I'd stroke your hair" or "I really like the way your chest looks in a T-shirt", before moving on to steamier things like "then I'd kiss your neck" or "remember when you did that thing to me in the shower?"
As always, how explicit you get, and how quickly, is entirely up to you.

How you're feeling : Describe the physical and emotional feelings you're experiencing as a result of what you're doing and/or what they're saying.

Moaning is a great way to communicate how good you're feeling. However, there's no need to do this if you're not comfortable with it. You can start with just letting your breath go at first, to help bring out little moans into louder moans.
Let them know when they've described or done something you really enjoyed . Likewise, don't be afraid to tell them when you don't enjoy something -- it'll allow the two of you to move on to something else that you'll both find enjoyable.

Tell me about your sexual fantasies: Describing your sexual fantasies allows you to paint a picture of their fantasies. [3]
X
Expert Source

Nicole Moore Love & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.

Let your partner speak out loud about their fantasies and you can do the same. [4]
X
Expert Source

Nicole Moore Love & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.

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Masturbate and orgasm (optional). Mutual masturbation and orgasm are excellent additions to phone sex, but they're not a requirement by any means.

Don't feel bad if your partner doesn't join you in masturbating. If you don't want to masturbate alone, ask them before you start if they'd be interested in joining you. Likewise, don't get anxious if they start masturbating and you don't want to -- you're not obligated to join them. Just enjoy listening to them pleasure themselves. Talk about your feelings about their father or mother and see if they agree. This can create a good bond before cumming.
Don't worry if one or both of you fail to reach orgasm . Think of it as the icing on the cake, rather than the goal of the exercise.
If you reach orgasm before your partner is ready to stop, don't go quiet! Continue talking to them, describing what you're feeling and imagining.

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Finish having phone sex. The point at which you decide to stop is up to you. There's no need to wait for orgasm -- or, indeed, to stop just because you've both come.

There's no rule as to how quickly you should end the call after finishing. Some people prefer ending the call as soon as their breathing has gone back to normal, whereas others prefer to stay on the line and chat.
Let your partner know how much you enjoyed yourself before you end the call.

How can I arouse a girl over the phone?

Nicole Moore

Love & Relationship Coach

Don't be afraid to use your imagination! Dial up the fun by asking something like: "If nothing was off-limits and it would be great no matter what, what would you want to do with me sexually that we haven't before?"

Is there any harm in having phone sex every day?

Not really, no. Since it's over the phone, there is obviously no chance of pregnancy or STDs. Just make sure you (and your partner) are not feeling pressured to do anything you/they don't want to do.

Why would couples do this in the first place? Why can't they just do this in real life?

Maybe if the husband/boyfriend or wife/girlfriend is away somewhere and the person they are dating wants to do it with them but can't. In this case, phone sex might might feel like they are being intimate from afar. There are many potential reasons why though, it's personal and between the consenting partners.

Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.

What to Say When a Guy Asks What You like in Bed

This article was co-authored by Nicole Moore . Nicole Moore is a Love and Relationship Coach and the Founder and CEO of Love Works Method, a private coaching and digital course service for women looking to find the right partner. With over a decade of experience, she specializes in body language and helping others take control of their dating life, attract a partner, and build a strong relationship. Nicole has been featured in numerous publications such as Cosmopolitan, Forbes, and USA Today. She also hosts Love Works with Nicole Moore, a podcast for modern women wanting love, dating, and relationship advice. Nicole holds a BA in Public Relations and Spanish from Syracuse University and a Certificate in Personal Coaching from New York University. This article has been viewed 5,037,432 times.

"This was a great guide and I will definitely be using it again."

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% of people told us that this article helped them.

"This was a great guide and I will definitely be using it again."

"I am new to this, as is my partner, and the article made us feel really relaxed and comfortable. It never came across as seedy and disgusting as we first thought and as some sites we looked at made it out to be. So thank you for a magical night." ..." more

"Gave me an idea of what to do when my partner wants to have phone sex. I never did that, didn't know what to do or how to do it, but now I understand that you feel silly. I do understand now that I need to relax." ..." more

"I just needed to know how to do phone sex. I mean, our last sex he didn't even know how to do. I was taking my clothes off, and he shut his eyes. I think this will make him a bit more comfortable." ..." more

"I'm kind of new to this. Recently, my boyfriend asked if we could participate in this activity, and I had to tell him I was uncomfortable because I had never done it before. This helped!" ..." more

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This article was co-authored by Nicole Moore . Nicole Moore is a Love and Relationship Coach and the Founder and CEO of Love Works Method, a private coaching and digital course service for women looking to find the right partner. With over a decade of experience, she specializes in body language and helping others take control of their dating life, attract a partner, and build a strong relationship. Nicole has been featured in numerous publications such as Cosmopolitan, Forbes, and USA Today. She also hosts Love Works with Nicole Moore, a podcast for modern women wanting love, dating, and relationship advice. Nicole holds a BA in Public Relations and Spanish from Syracuse University and a Certificate in Personal Coaching from New York University.

wikiHow marks an article as reader-approved once it receives enough positive feedback. This article has 18 testimonials from our readers, earning it our reader-approved status.

This article has been viewed 5,037,432 times.

Phone sex is a great way to spice up your sex life, whether you're doing it because your partner is far away, because you're not ready to have other kinds of sex yet, because you just want to try something new, or for any other reason! To have great phone sex, you need to let loose, stop being self-conscious , and be ready to get turned on, no matter how silly you may feel at first.

If you want to spice up a call with phone sex, start slowly by speaking in a low, soft tone and talk about something that will segue into steamier territory. For example, tell your partner how much you wish they were there with you or describe what you’re wearing. Once you get the ball rolling and you both feel comfortable, start to describe what you’re doing and get as raunchy as you want. You can even ask your partner for “advice,” like “Should I start playing with my underwear?” As the conversation continues to heat up, try masturbating together. However, don’t feel pressured about reaching orgasm, since that's the icing on the cake, rather than the goal of the exercise. For more advice, like how to set up a sexy atmosphere to get in the mood for phone sex, scroll down.
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Published October 27, 2015 1:44am EDT

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Even when you're close to home, phone sex can fire things up.
Phone sex has gotten a bad rap. It has sadly been relegated to 900 numbers and the desperately lonely and separated. But it’s time that phone sex was brought back to its rightful glory. It’s a great way to connect with a partner even if you both are in town and live in the very same home.
It might sound crazy, but it makes sense if you think about it. Most of us spend the majority of our days away from our partners. And then when we are back together, it’s after a long, stressful day at work with dinner waiting to be cooked, kids waiting to be bathed and dogs waiting to be walked.
It’s hard to bring the sexy back when that’s what you come back home to every day. That’s where phone sex comes in.
You see, part of the problem with not being able to connect with your partner after a long day is that you have not only been physically separated, but also mentally separated. If you do talk on the phone, it’s likely about who’s going to pick up the dry cleaning or where you should make dinner reservations for the weekend.
But when you’re apart, it's actually the ideal time to connect. Stay with me now. It can be hard to jump right into “Come on, baby, light my fire” the minute you walk in the door. Even with a partner you adore, it can feel a little scary or silly. But on the phone, freedom reigns. And it doesn’t necessarily have to be talking on the phone; it could be texting, IMing or e-mailing.
But, be aware, e-mail never dies and texts and voice messages have a way of popping back into your life at the least opportune times – ask Tiger Woods or Jesse James . Even if it’s your partner you’re whispering not-so-sweet nothings to, you still don’t want them broadcast to the whole universe – or even just your own family and friends, for that matter.
So ... my weapon of choice is the telephone, talking directly to my partner, where the only risk is someone overhearing and there is usually somewhere to be found that’s out of earshot of any nosy neighbors. Now here’s where the fun starts. Phone sex can be anything from, “I can’t wait to get my hands on you tonight” to “Right now, I’m using my tongue to find my way from your knees to your nose.”
You can play out entire scenarios or you can just tease your partner about what’s awaiting him or her at home that night. Entire scenarios can be especially fun when you’re home with total freedom to do and say as you please and your partner is squirming in his or her seat at work just hoping no one can hear the naughty nurse on the line.
“I’ve been a very bad nurse today, baby.”
“Uh, huh. I haven’t been paying any attention to my patients today.”
“Nope. I’ve only been paying attention to myself.”
“Well, right now I’m naked in front of the mirror examining my…”
You get the idea. So, while y
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