Pee Spitting

Pee Spitting
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It’s Thursday. It’s 7.56pm and you’ve gone to the Berkeley Bar & Terrace after work with a handful of handsome (ish) work colleagues and James Middleton’s therapy dog. You’ve bought a round of White Negronis, enjoying a couple yourself, and now, guess what? Your bladder feels like the bloated, rotting carcass of a blue whale floating amid the plastic and sewagy sludge that is the Pacific Ocean. That stinging sensation… no, not the STIs you never had zapped, rather it’s time for a pee. So you metaphorically stub out your Juul in your Saint Laurent car coat pocket, sink the last of whatever is in front of you in a crystal tumbler and head to the plush bathrooms, legs swinging like Liam Gallagher exiting an Easyjet flight to Ibiza.
Now, some men, apparently, don’t like peeing standing at urinals – at all. These men probably have really small penises. Either that or they like sitting down to do their tinkle business, which, quite frankly, is a separate House Rules column altogether. Anyway, for the sake of our time here, let’s pretend you’re confident enough to stand up. So, you assume the position at the urinal bank, undo your zipper, shake your legs as if you’ve been hit by a stun gun, give the old todger a little shimmy shake and…
Hang on. What did you just do? Did you just… spit? Huh? OK. It wasn’t some long, throat-clearing goblet of phlegm, but still, you definitely just spat. Yuk!
Have you ever asked: WTAF? Why do men spit before they pee while stood at a public urinal? Oh, you don’t, do you? Well, I’m sure – much like Sir Ian McKellen and Sir Cliff Richard and Tom Brady – when it comes to water closet etiquette you couldn’t be more… sterile. Yet, at a social engagement last month – admittedly after several tumblers of Yamazaki 12 – when I asked those men in attendance if they too spat briefly before peeing, pretty much all of them admitted to it, though most, it seemed, do it almost unconsciously.
So what’s that all about? Well, it seems House Rules isn’t the only Investigative Bureau Of Modern Aesthetic Sensibilities that has been looking in to such a puzzling but prominent phenomena, with theories about the pre-pee spit abounding across all modern platforms, both on the surface web and in darker digital echelons. Some feel it’s something to do with the pong of a public loo: the distaste one feels in one’s mouth prompting men (and some women, apparently) to spit rather than, erm, swallow their saliva. Others feel it is more to do with the acidity of one’s stomach while drinking alcohol, the idea that spitting will get rid of particular enzymes and so on, just keeping the tummy well balanced. Some myth busters also feel it’s simply something more animalistic, like marking one’s territory from both ends.
Here at House Rules, however, we like to think that this odd tradition is indicative of a little old-school machismo flex. Although gone are the days when men have to “man up” by sitting at a bar with a stiff upper lip, unemotional and unflinching, while the world burns around us, the uncouth, utterly revolting and unsophisticated act of spitting into the place where we are about to urinate is about as beastly as any of us should get any more. It’s a nod to our fathers, our grandfathers and our ancient, hairier forefathers. I am a man. I spit. I pee.
Now all we need to do, finally, is learn how to shake off any excess before tucking back in. Remember: when in doubt, dab. And that’s an instruction to use the paper provided, not perform the dance move.

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I do it. I don't know why I do it, but I do it.
It just seems like the one good time and place to spit.
Are you the weirdo motherfuckers who spit in urinals on the mint? That's just nasty.
I cannot begin to understand this habit. But if you must, then for gods sake please wait till you're alone. It's disgusting to have to listen to you hocking up your loogies.
I usually fart as well. Let er all all hangoutgirl!
Were you raised in a trailer park, OP?
No R8, but I'll admit to being white trash.
Could be blockage. Mine's a steady stream.
[quote]I do it. I don't know why I do it, but I do it.
straights LOVE LOVE LOVE to spit, and I really don't know why.
I sit when I pee.%0D %0D And still am able to blow a big loogy at the stall door.
R12, I'm most definitely NOT straight!
I spit like a straight boy. It is odd to admit even, but I do. I was outside in the parking lot at work talking to some friends on the way into work and I spit in the shrubs. I ALWAYS spit when I pee. I also spit when I'm hanging out on our patio, having a glass of wine and toking a bit.
I'm tougher and straighter than most real straight guys. But being gay, I never spit, and can't even when commanded. Guys who do and claim to be guy make me suspicious.
I'm self conscious about spitting because sometimes when I try and look tough and spit, I get spittle and that ain't hot.
Spitting in public is so low-class.
When my dick is out I swallow. It's just my instinct I guess
I never spit when I pee, but I spit when I cum. Some guys seem to get upset when it hits their face.
OP, if you're a woman, I'm quite impressed with your marksmanship.
The effeminates never do this. They can't relate.
I spit when I'm pissing at a public urinal. However, I rarely spit when I'm pissing at home or elesewhere. Don't know why. I just spit when at the public urinal.%0D %0D I peek at other guys' dicks too. I have to. I just can't resist. (Damn those places with urinal dividers. They take the joy out of taking a piss.)
You guys sound hot. I like them rough and redneck. By honestly I know of no gays who spit
i have a fetish for pissing in sinks. i am like a dog, once i piss in a sink once i feel no need to piss in the same sink for a couple weeks that is until my stench wears off. should i seek help for this condition?
I do this. I do this at work. Guys at my job take major dumps. I mean huge, explosive dumps. You can hear them from the hall.
I spit all year long. I'm in my car most of the day and I have either a bag of cherries or globe grapes. Both have pits/seeds and I spit them out through my sunroof. I have great command for distance and am able to hit the car behind me. Once in a while I'll just spit these seeds out the window, but I really enjoy spitting them out the sunroof; toilet spitting is a sympathetic reaction for me. If someone spits and catches my eye while taking a leak I will almost always spit too. I think it's like yawning.
Spit all you want. Just back up enough at the urinal so that I can see your dick without having severe eye strain. Size doesn't matter; I just want to see your dick pissing--turns me on.
This thread is giving me the vapors! Oh my heavens!
Sure, sometimes; often, even. I don't hock up stuff from the depths of rheumy lungs, or make a great commotion in doing, so if you've noticed, it's because you're paying too much attention.%0D %0D A public toilet may be a public place, but it has a different set of rules, such as not taking undue interest in what others with whom you may share the space are doing.%0D
R31. Honestly dude, I'm not trying to watch you spit. I'm just tyring discretely check out your dick at the urinal. Pay no attention to me, but don't make it impossible for me to see your little willy, and we won't have to even make eye contact.
[quote]Honestly dude, I'm not trying to watch you spit. I'm just tyring discretely check out your dick at the urinal. Pay no attention to me, but don't make it impossible for me to see your little willy, and we won't have to even make eye contact.%0D %0D Why I use stalls.
I thought this was a 'straight guy thing'. I don't get it. I don't understand it. It makes no sense.%0D %0D I never ever see it in gay bars.%0D %0D Go into any straight bar though, and every guy seems to slid up to the urinal, unzip, spit, and then pee.%0D %0D WTF?%0D %0D Where did they learn this? And why the fuck would any self-respecting gay person do this?%0D
R34. Gay men often spit when they piss. They may just not do it in front of other gay men at the urinal at the gay bar to the same degree as straight guys. But straight men have less inhibitions about spitting and pissing in front of each other. But trust me, gay men spit too. We're men--just like straight guys.
We've had this thread before so we can assume this is commonplace. I do this too, and have no idea why I do it. But it is satisfying to spit before you piss.
Maybe it goes back to when we were all monkeys? Hmmm...
Yet why spit in the first place, R35?
[quote]R34, Gay men often spit when they piss.%0D %0D I have NEVER seen it or witnessed it.%0D %0D Meanwhile, I've seen it almost CONSTANTLY with straight guys.%0D %0D Therefore, it's clear there's a huge, huge difference here. That a few gay men are stupid and classeless enough to do this, doesn't mean it's "all guys doing it".%0D %0D It's even more weird that straight guys seem to do it ALL THE TIME, EVERY TIME. %0D %0D It's even more weird that you're defending this bizarre and inexplicable practice.%0D %0D Also, this seems something "new", not something going back to the dawn of man. I never ever saw this ten years ago. I see it all the time the last few years though.%0D %0D It's a strange, strange habit.%0D %0D Seriously, just stop it.%0D
I sit when I pee too, it's just neater. Sometimes my stream splits in two, with one stream veering off in an unpredictable angle. Sitting down keeps it from making a mess. And even if your stream doesn't split in two, you're most likely spraying small fine drops on the toilet rim and on the floor if you pee while standing up.
R39, we're talking about URINALS. None of that applies.%0D
I even spit when sit to pee sometimes. Although I spit more often when I pee standing. When my aim is off, I have spat on my dick when sitting, but that is rare.
Now that is a problem...standing at the urinal and having to piss. Just as you begin to release your piss--you fart. Kind of embarrassing.
I sometimes piss on my shoes, that is more of a problem.
Confused female here. Do you spit in the urinal/toilet or on the floor?
I spit on my dick, it lubes it up nice
you don't know why you do it?%0D %0D would a "multiple choice" selection help?%0D %0D You do it because:%0D %0D a) it gives you some sexual thrill that would elude most people, a kind of fetish%0D %0D b) the behavior is automatic and you should see a neurologist about it%0D %0D c) you one saw an older male do it and you modelled the behavior subconsciously%0D %0D d) you recently visited a very bizarre hypnotist who programmed you to do this%0D %0D e) you salivate when you see yourself urinate and project the excess saliva%0D %0D f) some people need the sound of running water to help them become more urgent, for you that's too intense so you dial it down to the sound of a spit stream%0D %0D g) you are just fucking with us%0D %0D
Gay men spit when they pee at the urinal. We just don't spit in front of each other such as at a gay bar, etc. As a result, gay men think that only straight men spit when peeing. But it's not true. When gay men pee with straight men, many men of both sexual orientations spit. Men spit. Gay men are just more prissy about it in front of each other.
I don't know if you spitters realize it, but it's against the law in many states to spit in a public venue.%0D %0D And besides that, spitting is disgusting and can easily spread disease.
[quote]And besides that, spitting is disgusting and can easily spread disease.%0D %0D R50. Spitting into the urinal is not going to cause anymore disease than pissing into the urinal. Regarding breaking the law--arrest me. %0D %0D Sick to the subject. We're talking about spitting into a men's room urinal when you're taking a piss with other guys--not spitting on your grandmother's dining room table.
R52 is not me, R50.%0D %0D Bite me, R51.
Here is the most convincing theory i have come across: Spitting before urinating is coded into our habits by Evolution. For thousands of years men used to spit on the grass, or bushes before peeing to make sure there as no insect, snakes or other creatures that would attack them and bite their penis. The combination of sound produced by spitting, and the force of spit hitting the bush would make the creature move, signalling the man that its unsafe to pee at the place. It is mostly a safety precaution that is hard wired into us by evolution.
I shudder when I piss...as in shiver. Why is that?
I spit and breakout into show tunes when I take a piss. I believe this happens due to my tinnitus which has a heavy brass and percussion sound and tends to echo within tiled enclosures. Once in a great while I will also do a follies type kick and fart to be expressive and territorial.
Here in the South, out in public, some black mens like to catch the eye of a white man and then spit.
It's a black power "thang." In slave times, they be whipped for doing it.
An' inna baffroom, I see more black mens spitting than white mens.
I sit to pee at night, it's a lot easier and less 'awakening'.
Spitting? Never while peeing. I do like to pull up some phlegm and blow a hocker while I am running outdoors...when nobody is around.
R59, if you're a "sitzpinkler," as we say in German, where would you be spitting?
Mainly, I spit when pissing into a urinal when I'm away from home. However, I rarely spit into the toilet when pissing at home.
I can't create threads or polls here, but you should create a poll, OP. Make these the options:
1) I don't spit and don't smoke 2) I spit and don't smoke 3) I don't spit but I do smoke 4) I spit and smoke
I think the "spitting when pissing thing" is physical and psychological with all men. When pising, we are eliminating waste liquid from our bodies--and at the same time when spitting, we are eliminating any other liquid through our mouths.
We're getting rid of all liquid at the same time. In other words, killing two birds with one stone.
I mean 95% of the spitters will be #4.
I spit when I piss, sometimes (and I piss at a urinal rather than sit/squat like some prisspots.)
Do guys who fart in front of you in the bathroom, do they get embarrassed because it's in front of you? I worked with a guy who ripped one right next to me when I was at the stall and his face turned bright red and he couldn't talk to me or make eye contact with me for a month.
you take after your dad/brothers; it's low class.
OK, R54 -- if this is some instinct that men have because they're afraid bugs might bite their penii, why don't women spit when they piss? Believe me, when I piss on the ground, my pussy is a lot closer to the grass than your tiny dick will EVER be.
I've seen it done -- often -- but thankfully none of the menfolk in my illustrious family expectorate with they urinate.
Maybe, R69, you have an aromatic barrier.
I just saw someone standing barefoot at a urinal. Yuck! Every urinal I've seen has a puddle of urine and saliva underneath it.

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Why this strange symptom might spell double trouble

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You take a bathroom break and find your urine stream has — quite unexpectedly — divided in two. It might sound like a college fraternity party trick, but a split stream is no joke.

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Several underlying problems can cause this symptom, which is much more common in men than in women, says urologist Neel Parekh, MD . If you’re suddenly having trouble aiming, read on to find out what could be going on.
If your urine stream suddenly parts like the Red Sea, there’s no need to panic. These conditions can be treated with medications or surgery, depending on the cause, says Dr. Parekh. Still, some can be serious.
“The most worrisome thing is that the obstruction might prevent you from completely emptying your bladder ,” he says. “That can cause downstream problems for the bladder and kidneys.”
If a divided pee stream returns to normal within a day or so, it was probably a temporary blockage and not cause for concern. But if you continue to see double, a urologist can help you get back in the flow.
A split urine stream can occur for a variety of reasons. Find out what causes this surprising symptom — and whether you should worry.

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