Passed Out And Undressed
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Passed Out And Undressed
My daughter’s friend was passed out drunk and I felt her up [remorse]
My daughter’s friend was passed out drunk and I felt her up [remorse]
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Throw away for obvious reasons. My daughter Irene (21) invited her friend Emily (22F) to a party at our house that my wife and I had for the holidays. By 1am the last guest left, my wife went to bed (drunk) and I was cleaning up the house. Irene and Emily had drank a lot and were in the basement watching TV when Irene called me down. Emily was passed out on the bathroom floor, having puked several times. We carried Emily to the couch and then Irene went into the bathroom and I heard her puking too. Just great. I helped Irene upstairs to her bedroom where she flopped on the bed and fell asleep almost instantly. When I went back down to the basement Emily was back on the bathroom floor. She missed the toilet and was laying in her own vomit. I was at a loss for what to do. I obviously couldn’t leave her there in her vomit but my wife and daughter were of no use to me. I got Emily into the show stall (no tub) and tugged and with a lot of difficulty pulled off her shirt and pants and then cleaned her up with a wash cloth. She was a mess. I half carried her back to the couch and left her laying in her wet bra and panties while I, now quite out of breath, went up to find clothes for her. I came back with some of my daughter’s gym shorts and a T-shirt. As I looked at Emily and tried to figure out the best way to dress her, I suddenly couldn’t resist the temptation and I touched her breasts. The idea to do it hit me and an instant later I was doing it. Like no filter. And I felt them quite a bit, over and under the bra. I got hard. Emily stirred and I snapped to reality, backing out the room. She didn’t wake and I went back in and dressed her, this time having the urge to stroke her ass but fighting it off. Then I went to bed. The next morning all the ladies slept late and Emily left the house after having breakfast. She and Irene were embarrassed about being drunk and getting sick. Otherwise no weird vibes. I feel so confused about what I did. I’m not that kind of creep! But the urge to touch her was really overwhelming. It was like a right and wrong switch in my head got jammed and I did what I totally knew was wrong, wrong, wrong. Like assault wrong. Bad, bad! I know what I did was horrible and I do feel genuine [remorse]. But I am afraid that if the situation happened again, I wouldn't be able to resist temptation. What the hell is wrong with me? Should I seek help?
Everything about this is just disgusting. You should be protecting them from predators not being one. I would strongly suggest you no longer allow yourself to be alone with your daughters friends-sober or drunk.
Calm down, Jenny. He knows he crossed a line. He's not making a habit of it. Life happens.
Ah, but clearly you are, in fact, that kind of creep.
Every fondle story starts with "i undressed her to clean her up"
He knew what he was doing from the start.
Honestly, if I were Emily I would not have wanted to be undressed and cleaned up. I would appreciate being cleaned up just with a washcloth on the parts that are exposed and maybe get the chunks off my shirt. Then being laid out on a towel on the bathroom floor would be fine.
I just wouldn't want some adult man undressing me while I'm unconscious for any reason. Maybe you could do this for a close friend (MAYBE). You could definitely do this for your wife. But I think you bulldozed through some boundaries with this girl before you touched her boobs. Don't do that again, please.
Yes, undressing her was a huge mistake. She got way more wet in the shower than I intended. There were a lot of chunks and sticky bile and I ended up spraying her with the shower head because it grossed me out to wipe it off. So her shirt go soaking wet. And I couldn't leave her passed out, soaking wet and all pukey -- well I felt I couldn't. In retrospect, I guess I should have.
You need to learn boundaries. Who undresses their child's friend, for any reason??
Don't undress other people without their consent, regardless of your initial good intentions. If emily was awake, she wouldn't have been cool with you stripping her naked, so you shouldn't have done it.
As for the groping, get some therapy and avoid going anywhere near your daughters friends, for their sake. You took advantage of a person you were supposed to protect and keep safe. I know it may have been tempting, but your a fucking adult. grow up and be responsible.
You sexually assaulted her when she was vulnerable. Maybe you find that too harsh a term. Maybe you're thinking "It wasn't ASSAULT, I just touched her breasts! It was just LIKE assault!" Maybe you'll consider what you'd say if another man had done the same to your passed out daughter. You had no business touching her, removing clothes or anything else. What you did was disgusting. I hope you take into account how badly you feel about it now the next time you have such an "overwhelming" urge. Because yes, it does make you a creep, and making excuses for yourself about how you're not just means you need some help. Be a man, accept that you presently ARE that kind of person and go to a therapist.
someone once spiked a drink of mine, without me knowing...i wasnt messed up before, but i ended up in a condition ive never, ever been in..not before and not since..
luckily i had 2 great friends who got me home, before the guy who did it had a chance to do anything..unluckily for me, they had to leave and they left me in the care of someone i thought was a really good friend..someone i trusted..a friend who was pisssssed that i let myself get into that situation..a friend who, in the patchy moments i do remember, seemed so concerned and so pissed off, and so full of lectures..i remember things off and on, i remember sex wasnt even on the table at that time..i remember, after all his bitching, he tried to kiss me and i told him to leave....then i remember the world going black...and then i remember waking up, i know i lost a lot of time, it was probably hours later..but i woke up to this concerned friend, the same friend my other friends trusted leaving me with, fucking me...doing the same damn thing 2 people had already tried to save me from...
you were well on your way to being that asshole..creep doesnt even begin to cover it, neither does asshole but im being civil...i call my rapist an "opportunist", because he saw an opportunity and took it..just like you did..
you could have easily been him...what you were doing to her could have easily turned into what he did to me...you started going that route, with someone who trusted you..you had people drinking in your home, people who had an expectation of being safe and secure and you took advantage of that..
"like assault wrong" you said..it wasnt like assault, it WAS assault..just because she may not remember it doesnt clear you of that..you violated her trust, your daughters trust and your wifes as well..even if they dont know what happened, you still proved you cant be trusted..and you dont even trust yourself
on the plus side, youre concerned..you recognize that you did a really shitty thing, and you question if it may happen again..you DO need to get help before you hurt someone else, tho nothing you do can make what you did right...you need to get a handle on this, you need to think/talk about why you did this..and above all else, you damn sure dont need people getting wasted at your house if you feel you cant control yourself...
I could never understand the fulfilment a person gets from a non-responsive 'partner'
If you felt that bad, it would be out of the question that you'd do it again. The fact that you're thinking "if it happens again what if I can't resist" shows that you need to honestly ask yourself if you feel THAT bad. Go to a counselor and talk about it because this is worrying and 100% not normal. Not t mention any girl's worst nightmare.
You should probably talk to someone about this as what you did is sexual assault plain and simple. The fact that you knew it was wrong and did it anyways concerns me. I am also concerned about the part where some how you think undressing a unconscious girl by yourself is a good idea. You should have waken your wife up to help her, not you. I'd be pretty pissed if I was left alone to be showered and changed by one of my friends Dads regardless if his intentions were good. Op I don't think your intentions were good from the start or you would have woken your wife up to get her help. Undressing an unconscious girl wtf OP? It sound like you have a decent life with your family yet you were willing to risk your marriage and family just to grope some girl? The only hope for you is a therapist what you did is not normal. Seek help. And for the meantime you should not be alone or drinking with women, don't put your self in a situation that you will take advantage of again... for all you know this girl remembers everything and is deeply hurt by your actions. Seek help Op your creepy.
Maybe don't let young 20 year olds get blackout drunk and teach them about drinking responsibly and knowing their limits.
Even then these are kids that trust you. Honor that and manage your emotions, you're the adult and the example for them.
manage your emotions, you're the adult and the example for them.
Emotions? How about actions? He's a RAPIST.
It's been said more viscerally in the other comments so I won't go into it too much beyond to say I hope you seek counseling for these urges. Even if you were intoxicated the decision to undress a girl probably half your age and wipe her down was a poor one and I bet you know not made with pure intentions.
You need to talk with someone or at the very least proceed with the understanding that basically anything beyond cleaning her up a little and making sure she's not in medical danger was too far. There must be aspects of you that have trouble resisting the urge to physically act on subconcious thoughts and it should trouble you.
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I think someone had sex with me while I was passed out
friend
husband
sex
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I have gotten drunk many time with just my husband and never woke up sore and swollen. I have even passed out before once at my own b day party. My husband took care of me. He locked me in our room and would not let anyone near it. I woke up fine. This was his party and he got drunk as well. His friend said he put my husband to bed. All I know is its the first time I woke up like that and if I go to hospital surely they will find my husbands semen. Hell we had sex 2 days before party.
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I have gotten drunk many time with just my husband and never woke up sore and swollen. I have even passed out before once at my own b day party. My husband took care of me. He locked me in our room and would not let anyone near it. I woke up fine. This was his party and he got drunk as well. His friend said he put my husband to bed. All I know is its the first time I woke up like that and if I go to hospital surely they will find my husbands semen. Hell we had sex 2 days before party.
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I hate that people are commenting on how friends don't rape friends. Yes they do. All the time. Her husband was smart to lock the door if she was passed out. People suck. So don't be shaming her right now telling her that she must not have very good friends...because it happens all the freaking time. We need to teach men not to feel entitled to women's bodies, not shame women more. Jeebus.
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I hate that people are commenting on how friends don't rape friends. Yes they do. All the time. Her husband was smart to lock the door if she was passed out. People suck. So don't be shaming her right now telling her that she must not have very good friends...because it happens all the freaking time. We need to teach men not to feel entitled to women's bodies, not shame women more. Jeebus.
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I'm pretty sure we all agree with you. The best way to stop rape is to stop the people doing the action. That doesn't mean it is the only way to safeguard yourself. This behavior could easily lead to the couple being robbed. It is also dangerous to be passed out drunk without either resident coherent in case of a fire, which is much more likely during a party. I'm all for anti rape culture education in schools. But there is nothing wrong with promoting behavior to protect oneself.
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By
Azriel78 ,
May 7, 2017 in Emotions and Feelings
I had a birthday party for my husband. He had a couple friends show up. I got so drunk I passed out my husband said he and one of his friends had to put me to bed. Apparently a couple hours later his friend had to put him to bed cause he passed out. Idk what happened but I woke up the next morning and my vagina was sore and swollen. Later that day I told my husband and he flipped out was ready to kill his friend. Idk if he did anything to me or not. But I believe he did.
You should go to the hospital and have a rape kit done. I'm sorry this happened to you
That's a powerful allegation, the evidence for which you should be pursuing through a rape kit, not the internet. Drinking, particularly to the extent you're passing out, can cause dryness, swelling, irritation, and is a big shock to the immune system, which invites a plethora of conditions and symptoms. A physician would be in a much better position to help discern whether it's a physiological reaction from excess alcohol (or an underlying predisposition exacerbated by it) or whether there was indeed physical trauma.
Wishing you the best. Please don't delay.
I have gotten drunk many time with just my husband and never woke up sore and swollen. I have even passed out before once at my own b day party. My husband took care of me. He locked me in our room and would not let anyone near it. I woke up fine. This was his party and he got drunk as well. His fri
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