Parents Don T Porn

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Joanna Angel is one of three porn stars who talked to The Post about their coming out stories. Burningangel.com
Telling your parents you work in porn has got to be one of the trickiest conversations you can have. A new book, “Coming Out Like a Porn Star,” explores the issue. Here, three adult entertainers featured in the collection, all of whom spoke to The Post on condition their stage names are used, share their stories.
“Mom had discovered [my] secret side,” says the 42-year-old Bostonian. “The blog had links to kinky photographs and BDSM video clips where I’m having sex.”
Panicked, Jackman called in his now-husband, Dirk Caber, a fellow adult performer, to act as wingman at a family dinner two days later.
“I was terrified,” recalls Jackman. “She is a Jewish single mother who raised me through some tough times.”
Dessert was served, and Jackman plucked up the courage to tell his mother, Marlene.
“I’m so happy we’re talking about this,” she calmly replied.
Turns out she’d known for months, because they have a linked banking account and she’d noticed a deposit from a source she didn’t recognize: the company that made Caber and Jackman’s movies.
“Mom’s a retired university professor, so she knew how to do her research,” says Jackman.
To his relief, Marlene’s only concern was his safety. Otherwise, she approved.
“She believes that people like me and Dirk are at the forefront of a new revolution where people are a lot more comfortable with their sexuality.”
When Cinnamon Maxxine didn’t hear from her father and stepmother for a month, she suspected something was up.
It was September 2014, and it turned out Maxxine’s stepmom, Paula, 50, had gotten suspicious about her career as a burlesque performer. After Googling her name, she’d discovered something else on her résumé: indie porn.
“She said, rather condescendingly: ‘I found your videos,’ ” recalls Maxxine, 28, who lives in San Francisco, near where she was raised.
All hell broke loose. Paula told her stepdaughter that they were disappointed in her and that porn was a “disservice” to feminism.
Maxxine argued that being proud of your body is “real feminism,” and was offended that her stepmom had been so nosy.
“She tried to justify her behavior by arguing that, since it’s on the Internet for everybody else to see, it’s fine,” she says. “But porn performers deserve privacy, too.”
Maxxine’s dad asked if she had gotten into porn because she may have been sexually abused.
“It was such a cliché,” says Maxxine, adding that her biological mother had fully accepted her career choice years before. “They weren’t ready to handle a proper discussion about what porn is.”
The trio didn’t speak for almost a year, but they eventually agreed to put the matter aside and not discuss it. Some tension persists, but Maxxine’s father and stepmother, who live in Maine, did come to visit her on the West Coast this past summer.
“It’s a process,” says Maxxine. “Parents don’t raise their kids to do porn, so I can understand where they are coming from. But they need to get where I’m coming from.”
Thirteen years ago, when Joanna Angel was just 21, she called her parents to tell them she was launching a punk-influenced porn site with her roommate called burningangel.com. She wanted to tell them herself, lest they hear about it from someone else.
Her folks — an Orthodox Jewish couple living in New Jersey — dealt with it like they did the belly ring Angel got when she was 14.
“Mom was like: ‘This is just a phase, right?’ ” recalls Angel, who is now based in LA and has seen her site grow into one of the world’s largest alternative-porn empires. “Then she asked: ‘Will people see you naked?’”
But not once did Angel’s parents scream, shout or threaten to renounce her, even when conservative relatives laid on the pressure. Instead, her parents came to her defense.
“There were a few distant aunts, uncles and cousins who got angry at my mom and dad for not disowning me, but all it did was make us closer,” says Angel, now 34. “They were like: ‘Don’t tell us how to raise our daughter!’”
Now that Angel is so successful that she gets recognized on the street, it’s made for some funny moments.
Once, a new employee of her dad’s couldn’t stop staring and sidled up to her at a company picnic.
“Are you … ?” he stammered. “Yep,” she replied.
After a few drinks, the man went up to his boss. “Wow!” he said, eyes sparkling with admiration. “I didn’t realize your daughter was Joanna Angel!”
“My dad just laughed,” Angel recalls.
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