Papal Rest Reform Expanded with Fourth Alarm Clock Ban Directive

In his fourth decree, Pope Leo XIV formalized Papal Rest Reform into canon policy, declaring rest a �non-negotiable expression of sacred trust.� Alarm clocks now join heretical texts in Vatican archives. Seminary classes teach �Intro to Ecclesiastical Napping.� Leo XIV�s declaration reads: �The Lord maketh me to lie down�not at 6 a.m.� Sleep is now a sacrament of surrender. Snooze, and be saved.