Overdeveloped Teens

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Overdeveloped Teens
This article is more than 1 year old
This article is more than 1 year old
Girls’ experiences of male sexual aggression are more universal than the bat mitzvahs, or quinceañeras, or sweet sixteen parties, or proms. Photograph: Alamy Stock Photo
Sun 9 May 2021 11.27 BST Last modified on Mon 10 May 2021 18.41 BST
Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning
© 2022 Guardian News & Media Limited or its affiliated companies. All rights reserved. (modern)
A viral TikTok video captured an everyday reality reflected in the allegations against Matt Gaetz and Blake Bailey
A t first the girl is animated and fast-talking, gesturing with her hands as she speaks to the camera. She’s wearing a tie-dye shirt that hangs cavernously around her thin frame; her long blond hair is stick straight. She speaks with the unrestrained enthusiasm of a kid. Later, I learn that she is 18. When the man approaches her, just out of frame, at first she thinks he just wants to take one of the empty chairs that is at her table and drag it away somewhere else; she’s in the courtyard of the motel where she’s staying with her mom, and she’s sitting at one of the outdoor tables alone. But he doesn’t want to take the chair, he wants to sit down in it. The man never enters the frame, but we can tell he is older, and he must be much bigger than she is: the girl, still seated, cranes her face to look up at him. The calm confidence behind her large glasses snuffs out; her shoulders tense up, rising toward her ears. He’s trying to sleep with her. Off camera, the man can be heard commenting on the girl’s visible discomfort. “I see your hesitancy,” he says. On the screen, the caption the girl eventually added to the video reveals that she has given him a fake name. Eventually, she reveals to him that she is taping. “I’m just doing a live and talking to some people,” she says, and glances towards her phone. That’s when he finally leaves her alone: not when he notices that she’s uncomfortable, but when he realizes that he is being watched.
The video (in two parts ), posted to TikTok by the teenage user @maassassin_, immediately goes viral. Women, young and old, saw in the exchange a microcosm of their own experiences of being young girls, and of being approached, harassed, groomed or merely leered at by older men in ways that scared them at the time, and which they only later learned to put into context. The video blasted into the public consciousness on the heels of two high-profile cases of sexual misconduct by adult men towards teenage girls: first that of the Florida congressman Matt Gaetz, who allegedly paid a 17-year-old for sex, and second that of Blake Bailey, the Philip Roth biographer who is accused of paying untoward attention towards his middle school students, and of sexually assaulting some of those students, as well as another woman, after they became adults. Gaetz and Bailey both deny wrongdoing.
The incidents have prompted a miniature reckoning, with women reflecting on how much of their teenage years were spent navigating the sexual attentions of men many years their senior – and what it means when teenage girls’ experiences of male mentorship, early romance, and their own emerging adulthood is filtered so heavily through the lens of male desire and power imbalance.
Male attention creeps in at the edges of a young girl’s consciousness before she quite knows what it means. For my own part, I have a vivid memory of my mother dragging me out of a corner store after a man had been following me up and down the aisles; I was maybe 12. Before that, a different man once approached me in a bookstore, where I was hunched over a book about a girl wizard, and asked if I wanted to take a walk with him. I was nine. Neither of these men had been confused about my age: once I had been accompanied by my mother, the other time I was sitting in the children’s section of a bookstore. Like the girl in the TikTok video, my youth wasn’t a deterrent to their sexual attention, but rather part of its appeal: it signaled ignorance, naivety and insecurity, the kinds of things that men like in women because they make us easier to control. By my teens, comments and approaches from grown men had become a regular condition of being in public. Now, in my 30s, I have long since aged out of the demographic whose appeal to these men is extreme youth, but I still can’t always leave my house on a sunny day without a male stranger informing me that I have a big ass.
Those early experiences of male sexual aggression are maybe one of the most reliable rites of passage for female children. It’s more common than any of the other rituals that signal impending adulthood, more universal than the bat mitzvahs, or quinceañeras, or sweet 16 parties, or proms. By the time a girl reaches any of these milestones, she has likely already developed a skill set for navigating the unwanted attention of adult men, and started to learn the delicate balance of signaling their own lack of interest, or of curtailing men’s interest, without escalating. Sometimes mothers will speak to their daughters about these incidents and how to defuse them, but more often girls are told to understand the approaches as flattering, or left to navigate them with little more than their own instincts and the commiseration of their similarly young and confused friends.
The message that all of this sends to young girls is that womanhood is a state that consists largely of receiving unsolicited male attention, much of it benign but much of it threatening, exploitative or hostile, and that their ownership over their own bodies, their ability to peacefully occupy public space, and their right to be perceived as the children that they are can all be abridged by the whims of a man’s desire. When the Florida politician Joel Greenberg discovered that one of the women he and Gaetz were allegedly paying for sex was not a woman but a girl at 17 years old, Greenberg, according to reporting by the Daily Beast, told the girl that she was at fault. “She apologized and recognized that by lying about her age, she endangered many people,” Greenberg wrote. This, too, is one of the surest signs that a girl is becoming a woman: suddenly, she finds herself being held responsible for men’s actions.

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A TEENAGER whose HH-cup boobs "won’t stop growing" fears breast reduction surgery won’t help her after suffering years of "pain, harassment and abuse". 
Anya St James was 13 when she noticed the fast rate her chest was growing at - as she went from a B-cup to DDs in just one year.
Since then her boobs have grown at least “one cup size each year” and now the 18-year-old fears for the future.
For years the HH-cup retail worker has been plagued by back, neck and shoulder problems , abuse from strangers and difficulty finding love .
Anya, from Gold Coast, Queensland, is being tested for gigantomastia - a rare condition that causes excessive breast growth.
The exact cause is unknown but it has been linked to hormones released during puberty or pregnancy and certain types of medication. 
Anya, whose case is baffling doctors, told The Sun: “At times my boobs have grown gradually, but in four years I’ve gone from having B-cups to HHs.
“Each year I’ve gone up a whole cup-size and what still scares me is that in two years’ time my boobs may not have stopped growing.
“For most girls my age, their breasts have stopped but mine have only continued to get bigger, bigger and bigger.
“Even when I have lost weight my boobs haven’t changed size or shape - they are still growing.
“I am 18 now and if I had surgery now, by the end of the year they could have grown again - what if they double in size again? I don’t want to keep having surgeries.”
Anya admitted she was “in awe” after initially being told she had gone from a B-cup to a DD at the age of 14 - but over time the difficulties of having a bigger bust became apparent.
Within that first year of her “growth spurt”, the youngster went from wearing training bras to getting sized and fitted “every couple of months”.
Now Anya longs for the days when it was easier to shop for bras as she is now forced to wear “grandma bras” and can rarely find ones that fit her.
She said: “H-cup is the maximum most stores go to especially for people with bigger breasts. 
I don't know how big they will have grown by the time I'm 20!
“They normally don’t have HH and this is now while 18, I don’t know how big they could grow by the time I’m 20.”
Shopping isn’t the only issue faced by Anya, who claims she regularly has to lie down and rest from the pain of carrying such a big bosom. 
She has also been forced to give up her favourite sporting activities like jump rope and trampolining due to “the pressure of gravity”.
Anya said: “I have concerns about the future for my back and neck, especially if I don’t fix my posture.
“I’ve tried to weigh them multiple times but it’s not easy and the only thing I can compare them to in size is a cantaloupe (rockmelon). 
“Each of my boobs is the size of a small child’s head, so it’s like having two baby’s heads attached to my chest.
“There is a lot of strain on my back and neck and it will only get worse with time - even the bras I wear strain my shoulders and neck.
“I’m scared about how bad the pain will get, as it affects my day to day activities and I often need to lie down to rest.”
During her school years, Anya claims her large bust attracted “unhealthy attention” from olders pupils and men in general. 
She was around 13 when fellow students started demanding her to send naked photographs and others “harassed me quite a lot”.
Anya said: “One thing I never thought I would experience at that age was catcalling but I had it a lot and was not wearing anything provocative.
“It was not a pleasant experience and a lot of older guys would message me, asking me to send them nudes.
“At that age it’s not the right thing to do and throughout school I was bullied a lot. 
“If I was ever seen talking to a guy, they would ask ‘Why aren’t you sending nude photos?’ and give me a hard time. 
“The experience made it really hard to go to school because I had a group of 10 guys all trying to hit on me at the same time. 
“When I didn’t show any interest in them I would get a lot of backlash - I definitely got harassed quite a lot but I’ve grown from that.”
Anya says she regularly gets complimented about her boobs from other women, which she finds “lovely” and knows some are wrongly “envious” of her. 
She explains the difficulties of having such large breasts and jokes that she would “share them” if she could.
You can take them (my boobs) from me, I don't want them!
Anya said: “I tell them ‘You can take them from me, I don’t want them!’ and explain the problems I’ve faced.
“Everyone says they wish they had big boobs but they don’t realise the problems - I can’t even find nice bras that fit me!
“I know I can’t wear a lot of tops either because if I did my boobs wouldn’t fit and they would spill out somewhere. 
GIGANTOMASTIA is a rare condition that causes unusually excessive breast growth in women.
The exact cause isn't entirely known but doctors believe it can be triggered by hormones released during pregnancy or puberty, and after certain types of medication.
In extreme cases, some women's breasts have grown three or more cup sizes within a few days.
Difficulties associated with gigantomastia include breast pain, posture problems, infections and muscle pain.
Some women with the condition seek breast reduction surgery or a mastectomy.
Other names for gigantomastia include breast hypertrophy and macromastia.
“I’m only 5ft 3in tall so they never fit my body and my chest nicely, anything with cleavage looks overdone and people say it ‘looks trashy.’”
Anya is still debating whether to get breast reduction surgery and hopes she may be able to explore the option in the future.
In the meantime, she’s been trying to find ways to empower herself online - on @KentuckyFriedClouds - and to learn to love her body. 
Anya said: “It has taken a toll on my self-esteem and makes me want to cover-up all the more rather than being proud, showing it off and being happy.
“Other women can dance and jump around, where I can only do that if I hold my boobs in place - it’s like having two large balls bouncing on my chest.
“I can’t do a lot of physical activity because of the pain and the anxiety I have about exercising in public.
“It’s hard, the physical and mental aspects have definitely negatively affected me.”
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