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Thread starter
Hectic
Start date
Apr 2, 2009
Joined
Jun 8, 2006
Messages
75,149
Supports
30fps
Joined
Jul 24, 2007
Messages
11,531
Hectic I thoroughly enjoyed your 'test thread' and tried to post 'hello!' to feck it up. Alas, it was not to be.
Joined
Jul 14, 2008
Messages
18,060
Location
I may be the devil, but i'm not a monster
You: -_ You are connecting with an Omegle Chat Operator. Please wait a few moments while we connect you _ -
You: -_Connected_-
You: Hello Stranger! I am Dave, one of the Omegle Chat Staff, is there anything I can help you with?
Stranger: woww
Stranger: is this for real? are you really working omegle?
You: Yes I am, there's a group of us who regulate the Omegle chats after security concerns were raised several months ago.
You: Have you heard of chatroulette?
Stranger: lol yah of course
You: Well, this is why we are here. It's become a risk to allow all chats to go unsupervised, we just can't be sure the content and direction of the chats are safe.
Stranger: that makes sense actually. alot of weirdos here
Stranger: not as bad as the other place but still
You: Is English your first language?
Stranger: no no but i think i speak very well
You: Have you had any problems or issues with any recent conversations?
Stranger: yes! I had a racist guy abuse me for about 5 mins
You: May I ask when this was, I can bring up the log and ban his IP Address so he can not make that mistake again.
Stranger: awesome!!!! i think it was about 2 nights ago maybe
You: Okay, I'm going to bring up the chat and review it now.
Stranger: i told him i would have the last laugh hahaa
You: Okay, I have seen the chat, and have banned him as a consequence, please bare with me.
Stranger: no problems man thanks for all of this too
You: I've just checked a few of your older chats, it appears you aren't that innocent either.
Stranger: what?!!? when?! no i never do bad on here
You: I can see you've called yourself John in many of these chats, we do not encourage or allow users to post links to pornographic content, or insulting minorities
Stranger: wow! no please listen you got it all wrong here, im minority
Stranger: my names not john though and i never done any of that i swear it
You: John, I can see your chats as clear as day, you can't complain of racism one day, then insult an entire continent the next.
Stranger: no no i dont even know what that is!!
Stranger: he was the racist not me, i just said i would laugh is all
You: Not laughing now though are you John?
Stranger: not anymore no
You: John, by Omegles rules I have to report your IP Address to both your ISP and the ISPACT (Internet Security Protocols & Anonymous Counter-Threat)
Stranger: wait wait wait please i dont know what these means
You: This means your recent activity on Omegle and your internet in general will come under review. Your ISP will build a case, and if ISPACT act on it, then you will be in severe trouble with the law.
Stranger: honestly please i only mess around on here a little bit, cyber and insults is all
Stranger: i have never in my life sent pornographic stuff, and im not a racist please dont do this
You: John, why should I believe you? You couldn't even admit this is your name.
Stranger: i admit it i do. its john alright
You: Alright John. I'm going to put you on a probation period.
Stranger: what does this mean for me
You: This means all of your internet usage will be under temporary review, this doesn't just mean Omegle, but everything.
Stranger: oh my god why is this happening
You: I strongly recommend you stay off the porn sites, as I can see you use them alot, and focus on contributing something sensible to the internet.
You: Do I have your word?
Stranger: you do, you do. word. its not me who uses the porn stuff, my sister also uses computer so i dont know
Stranger: i will contribute just please dont do anything
You: This is your last warning John, okay?
Stranger: yes i am sorry, no more!
You: No more.
Stranger: no.
You: I'll be watching you John. Now get out of here.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Joined
Mar 10, 2010
Messages
2,022
Location
Plymouth
Pat_Mustard
I'm so gorgeous they want to put me under arrest!
Joined
Jan 17, 2008
Messages
12,609
Location
A never-nude? I thought he just liked cut-offs.
You: Well, hello there, may I ask, male or female?
Stranger: hey. female here!
You: Wonderful to speak to you, miss stranger. Are you well?
Stranger: yes lol...a bit posh for omegle
You: Well, as they say, politeness is next to godliness.
Stranger: do they say that?
You: I do. I used to follow a different philosophy, but my life changed.
Stranger: ok sounds a bit serious
You: You could say it was an awakening of sorts.
You: Would you be up for acting out a little role play?
Stranger: sexual ??
You: That's entirely upto you, my sweet.
Stranger: ok yeah but i want you to lead
You: Not an issue. I turn on some music, pavarotti's voice circles the room, creating a warmth inside both of us. I take your hand and place a gentle kiss on the surface.
Stranger: oooo, i let out a moan
You: I survey the view from my balcony, life is good, I remove my pipe and my monacle, and let of a rich, hearty laugh.
Stranger: what are you laughing at?
You: I turn around, slowly, I can almost hear your heart thumping against your chest.
You: My mask slips off slowly, I see your mouth open in shock, as I say,
You: I'M ONLY DANNY DYER AINT I!!
You: feckin ell love, its me DANNY LIVE UNTIL I DYER.
Stranger: danny dyer? omg not again
You: AGAIN?
You: NAH
You: NAH. ITS ME. THE feckING BUSINESS.
You: FORGET ROSS KEMP, IM THE REAL GANG WHISPERER
Stranger: well this was a big turn off
Stranger: feck off
Stranger: did you see what i said?
You: I SAID NICE 1 BRUVVVAAAAAAAA!!!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Joined
Jan 13, 2008
Messages
32,781
Location
Kebab Shop
Hectic, this is brilliant. Each one, fecking funny. Mad Props G.
Joined
Mar 17, 2008
Messages
43,792
Location
The CL is a glorified FA Cup set to music
Supports
orderly disembarking on planes
Joined
Nov 8, 2009
Messages
10,766
Just read the whole thread, and my stomach hurts from laughing.
Joined
Jun 8, 2006
Messages
75,149
Supports
30fps
Xander45
Know-It-All Champion May 2009
Joined
Mar 31, 2006
Messages
20,313
Location
Fratton Park, play up Pompey!
I never fully understood that reply.
Zarlak
my face causes global warming
Joined
Apr 30, 2010
Messages
45,236
Location
Truth like rain don't give a feck who it falls on.
Epic. Puts 'wizard hat and robe' to shame.
Joined
Jun 8, 2006
Messages
75,149
Supports
30fps
Isn't that the what the /b/ forum lot call themselves?
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
13,041
Location
Stop paying attention to this a while ago
You: -_ You are connecting with an Omegle Chat Operator. Please wait a few moments while we connect you _ -
You: -_Connected_-
You: Hello Stranger! I am Dave, one of the Omegle Chat Staff, is there anything I can help you with?
Stranger: woww
Stranger: is this for real? are you really working omegle?
You: Yes I am, there's a group of us who regulate the Omegle chats after security concerns were raised several months ago.
You: Have you heard of chatroulette?
Stranger: lol yah of course
You: Well, this is why we are here. It's become a risk to allow all chats to go unsupervised, we just can't be sure the content and direction of the chats are safe.
Stranger: that makes sense actually. alot of weirdos here
Stranger: not as bad as the other place but still
You: Is English your first language?
Stranger: no no but i think i speak very well
You: Have you had any problems or issues with any recent conversations?
Stranger: yes! I had a racist guy abuse me for about 5 mins
You: May I ask when this was, I can bring up the log and ban his IP Address so he can not make that mistake again.
Stranger: awesome!!!! i think it was about 2 nights ago maybe
You: Okay, I'm going to bring up the chat and review it now.
Stranger: i told him i would have the last laugh hahaa
You: Okay, I have seen the chat, and have banned him as a consequence, please bare with me.
Stranger: no problems man thanks for all of this too
You: I've just checked a few of your older chats, it appears you aren't that innocent either.
Stranger: what?!!? when?! no i never do bad on here
You: I can see you've called yourself John in many of these chats, we do not encourage or allow users to post links to pornographic content, or insulting minorities
Stranger: wow! no please listen you got it all wrong here, im minority
Stranger: my names not john though and i never done any of that i swear it
You: John, I can see your chats as clear as day, you can't complain of racism one day, then insult an entire continent the next.
Stranger: no no i dont even know what that is!!
Stranger: he was the racist not me, i just said i would laugh is all
You: Not laughing now though are you John?
Stranger: not anymore no
You: John, by Omegles rules I have to report your IP Address to both your ISP and the ISPACT (Internet Security Protocols & Anonymous Counter-Threat)
Stranger: wait wait wait please i dont know what these means
You: This means your recent activity on Omegle and your internet in general will come under review. Your ISP will build a case, and if ISPACT act on it, then you will be in severe trouble with the law.
Stranger: honestly please i only mess around on here a little bit, cyber and insults is all
Stranger: i have never in my life sent pornographic stuff, and im not a racist please dont do this
You: John, why should I believe you? You couldn't even admit this is your name.
Stranger: i admit it i do. its john alright
You: Alright John. I'm going to put you on a probation period.
Stranger: what does this mean for me
You: This means all of your internet usage will be under temporary review, this doesn't just mean Omegle, but everything.
Stranger: oh my god why is this happening
You: I strongly recommend you stay off the porn sites, as I can see you use them alot, and focus on contributing something sensible to the internet.
You: Do I have your word?
Stranger: you do, you do. word. its not me who uses the porn stuff, my sister also uses computer so i dont know
Stranger: i will contribute just please dont do anything
You: This is your last warning John, okay?
Stranger: yes i am sorry, no more!
You: No more.
Stranger: no.
You: I'll be watching you John. No
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