Old Traders Never Die

Chapter 7

'This is not a takeover', our new regional chairman said as he addressed us a few days later, 'Please look at it as a partnership whereby we will harness the best of both our businesses - people, technology, processes. We didn't buy this business to destroy it, I assure you'.

'Total crap', Adrian, another young trader in my team said to me as we listened. 'If it isn't a takeover, then why are they all over the trading floor, the conference rooms and the canteen ? Of course it's a fucking takeover'.

'Take it easy, Adrian', I replied. 'You've got to give the Yanks a chance'.

'A chance to do what ? Get rid of us all ? And won't that be fun being out looking for a job in this market'.

'Dave's right, Adrian', Peter interjected, 'Give them a chance. And anyway, decent traders are always in demand. You've got nothing to worry about'.

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'Nigel's leaving', Adrian said a he rushed up to me.

'What!?', I said, clearly startled.

And it was true. I looked over to see that he was already clearing his desk.

'Oh well', Nigel said as I entered his office. 'I guess I didn't make the cut'.

'Fuck, Nigel', I replied, 'They're a ruthless bunch of fuckers'.

'It's just business, Dave. It's nothing personal. Anyway, I've got a decent pay-off, and I've a few irons in the fire. I won't be out the market for long. I'll be back after gardening leave, I'm sure', Nigel said confidently.

'Well, don't forget your old mate', I said hopefully, 'I might be looking for a new job too soon'.

We shook hands, and Nigel promised to keep in touch.

'Any idea who's coming in to replace you ?', I asked as I headed back to my desk.

'They're sending someone over from New York', he shouted after me. 'He'll be here tomorrow'.

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The next day arrived, and sure enough, so did Michael. But we weren't introduced to him. He just sat in his office that day, and, in fact, for the rest of the week, immersed in papers and looking up computer files.

'Do you think he'll ever come out of that office', Adrian asked.

'It's probably better for us lot if he doesn't', Peter replied. 'At least while he's in there he can't do much damage', he laughed.

But Peter was wrong. We found out later that day that Michael had left his office long enough to meet with Tim in an upstairs conference room - and fire him.

'We'll all go on strike', Adrian said. 'We'll show solidarity with Tim. If they fire one of our best traders, then what hope is there for the rest of us'.

'But that's just it, Adrian', I replied. 'They don't regard Tim as anything but a menace. They won't tolerate his sort here'.

'But he is one of us', shouted one of the other traders from across the floor. 'He's an arsehole, yeah, but at least he's our arsehole. We gotta do something'.

'A strike it is', Adrian repeated.

'Don't be stupid', Peter said as he joined the huddle around my desk, 'You'll just get fired for doing that. You need to be more subtle'.

'Any ideas, Peter ?' I asked.

'We'll just start by going sick - 10 at a time'.

Chapter 8

'Six traders have called in sick this morning', Judy, Michael's PA, told him soon after 7.30am the following day.

'Yeah', Michael replied. 'There are a few others on the floor complaining of being ill too. Must be something going around'.

And the 'sickness' got worse. Another 9 traders went down with the mystery illness the next day, and 7 more the day after.

'This is crazy', Michael said to Judy. 'We'll never hit our monthly revenue target at this rate. I've never seen such a bunch of wimps. Traders never get sick. You got any idea what's wrong with these guys ?'

'That Peter guy, the older man over there. He told me he'd heard it was something called 'Timitis'', Judy replied.

'Timitis', Michael repeated. 'That's a new one on me'.

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'I think I know what 'Timitis' is', Judy said breathlessly, as she entered Michael's office later that day. Michael listened intently as she gave her explanation.

'I don't know whether to laugh or cry', Michael said after he had heard her out. 'You'd better get that Peter in here. He seems to know what's going on'.

'Good to finally meet you, Peter', Michael said as he strode across his office floor and shook the older man's hand. 'I'm just sorry that I haven't had the chance to say 'hello' before'.

'So am I', Peter replied somewhat enigmatically.

Michael got the point, but decided to let it go. 'I'm in a bit of a bind here', Michael said as he faced Peter. 'You guys have forced me into a corner; either I fire all those traders who have been taking days off sick, or I reinstate Tim. And to be honest, neither prospect fills me with joy'.

'Firing staff who are sick isn't the way things we do things over here', Peter replied. 'And I'm sure that every trader will have got a sick note from his doctor', he continued. 'Having said that, I bet that a lot of people around here would feel a whole lot better if Tim was to get his job back'.

'But that's blackmail, Peter'.

'No, Michael, that's just good business'.

'Do you really think that having me perceived as a weak manager is going to be good for business ?'

'I don't know about that', Peter replied, 'But I do know that it won't do your career much good if you lose a lot of traders and fail to meet your revenue targets'.

'So very true, Peter. So, is there a way out ? Is there a way of sorting this thing out so that no-one loses face ?'

'Well, I guess you could always bring over some of your own traders, Michael. Form a new team, and stick Tim in with them. Maybe they can knock him into shape. Make him fit in. That should bring him down a peg or two. And it'll give you a chance to have a proper look at him. He's a good trader. You'll be surprised'.

'I'll mull that over. Thanks for that', Michael replied, as he stretched over and shook Peter's hand once again. 'Oh, and I'll be watching you', he said, as he escorted him to the door.

'I think everyone will be watching you, too', Peter replied.

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Michael seemed to be lightening up. He emerged from his office more often, and started to walk the floor, engaging with the traders. And they responded well. Michael's face was soon seen in the canteen each lunchtime, and we even got him out for a beer one evening after work'.

'So, how long you been with the bank', I asked as I knocked back a lager.

'Around 12 years', Michael replied. 'All my career, really. And all of it in New York'.

'Hear that, Peter', I teased. 'No wonder Michael was scared to leave his office. He's never been anywhere but New York before!'.

'Typical fucking yank', Peter replied. 'Bet you thought Paris was in Texas, didn't you ?', he said as he looked across at Michael. We all laughed.

'And what about US Bank ?', I said as I continued the questioning. 'They're pretty ruthless aren't they ? Coming in and ripping the heart out of everything they acquire'.

'They're pretty good at extracting value, if that's what you mean'.

'Extracting value!', Peter interjected. 'That's a fucking good one'.

'And what about the CEO ?' I asked, 'Isn't he a piece of work !'.

Michael laughed. 'Yeah', he said. 'He's pretty gruff. But he knows what he's doing. He's tough, but has a big following. And that's because he tells it like it is. He doesn't care who he upsets - employees, clients, stockholders, regulators, lawmakers. He shoots straight from the hip'.

'You sound like quite a fan', Peter said.

'I'm not sure that 'fan' is the right word, Peter, but I do know him quite well. After all', he smiled, 'He is my dad'.

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'Fuck me', I said to Peter as we climbed in the taxi to share a ride home. 'I knew they had the same surname, but had no idea he was the son of the CEO!'.

'We shouldn't hold that against him, Dave', Peter said as he lit up a cigarette, ignoring the 'No Smoking' sign inside the vehicle. 'He seems like a decent guy'.

'Yes, he does', I replied, 'But I'm not sure I how feel about having the Group CEO's son as my boss!'.

Source: Here Is The City