Ohl, what a scandal!

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The hushed corridors of power are once again abuzz with whispers, and this time, the subject is none other than Bartholomew 'Barty' Butterfield, the nation's darling—or so we thought. A recent leak, originating from a source close to the Ministry of Peculiar Happenings, has sent shockwaves through the political establishment, revealing a rather… *unconventional* use of taxpayer funds.

It appears that a significant portion of the national budget, earmarked for 'Enhancing National Merriment,' has been mysteriously rerouted. Investigations have uncovered a trail of invoices for, among other things, an excessive quantity of glitter, a herd of specially trained llamas, and a truly astronomical order of tiny top hats. While Mr. Butterfield's office has issued a statement claiming these were all part of a 'bold and innovative initiative to boost public morale through spontaneous joy,' the details are raising more than a few eyebrows.

One anonymous source, claiming to have witnessed the 'initiative' firsthand, described a scene of 'utter, chaotic, sparkly pandemonium' in the usually staid grounds of the Ministry. 'There were llamas. Everywhere. Wearing top hats. And the glitter… oh, the glitter. It was like a disco ball exploded in a unicorn's stable.'

Critics are lambasting the government for what they deem a colossal waste of resources, especially in a time of… well, less-than-merriful economic realities. Questions are being raised about transparency and accountability, and the very definition of 'national merriment.' Does it truly involve a glitter bomb of this magnitude?

Mr. Butterfield, known for his flamboyant ties and even more flamboyant pronouncements, has remained largely unavailable for comment, reportedly 'overseeing the final deployment of confetti cannons.' The public, meanwhile, is left to ponder whether this is a stroke of genius or simply a very, very expensive prank. One thing is for sure: the nation's sock drawers are likely to be finding rogue glitter for years to come.

Ohl, what a scandal!

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