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The Best Dating Apps for New Yorkers
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The Best Dating Apps for New Yorkers
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Dating can be challenging anywhere — but as any single New Yorker will tell you, dating in NYC is a whole other beast. For starters, no one moves to the Big Apple to fall in love (despite what every cheesy rom-com tells you). If you call New York City home (and you don't have mom or dad floating you), you're probably hustling to get ahead in some super competitive field while also trying to get a workout in, find time to check out that new bar that just opened up on your corner, make it to your old coworker’s birthday in order to keep your network warm — and the list goes on and on.
So if you're dating in New York and planning to add “looking for love” onto that already too long to-do list, you want to choose a dating app that's going to give you the most ROI for your time spent on it. That's just smart New Yorker math for you. But when you're up against busy schedules that often conflict (i.e., you're working the corporate 9-6 while she's behind the line at N.Y.C.'s latest concept restaurant all night), plus a sea of seemingly endless dating options and, let’s be real, people who flake more often than probably anywhere else, you can start to feel burnt out pretty quickly.
To help you find a match in the most time efficient way possible, we've asked a few dating experts to share their best tips and advice for using apps to find love in New York City. Here's what they had to say about overcoming the dating challenges specific to New York, which apps to use, and why they're great for finding new love for New Yorkers.
"You haven't met anyone special in that entire city full of people?" — every grandparent whose grandson has ever been a bachelor in New York City. And while it's true that New York City’s dating pool is vast, dating expert Kevin Murray says those numbers can actually start to work against you. "Clients in New York certainly don't have a problem with quantity — however, it's where the quality dates lie that can be the problem," he explains. "Since many apps search in a perfect circle mile radius, there’s a with problem pulling in potential matches from areas that are close by, because in social norms and reality they’re a whole continent away. For example: if you're dating in lower Manhattan and are willing to date people located in upper Manhattan, most apps will pull in singles from Jersey City and Long Island. Many New Yorkers don't want to cross the bridges to date someone on a serious relationship/recurring dates type of fashion."
So, why not do it the old fashioned way? As social media researcher Sarah-Rose Marcus explains, no one has time for that either. "New York City’s fast pace and emphasis on career proves challenging for dating because people are so busy that it is sometimes hard to meet others face to face during their downtime," she explains. "Even if people go to happy hours with their friends, they often don’t have the energy to strike up a conversation with a prospective partner." And when you have met someone you're interested in, whether it's an online match or someone IRL, trying to find a time that works for both of you can prove more trouble than it's worth. "Not only is there a struggle to meet, but there is also a struggle to set up a date once you have met someone due to conflicting work schedules," Marcus continues. "Many people talk about how exhausted by dating they are: by carving out time on a weeknight after a long day of work, by dressing up, by traveling to an inconvenient location."
So how can you use dating apps to overcome these challenges, not add to them? Erika Ettin, founder and CEO of A Little Nudge, has a strategy to help. "I call it the 5 to 1 Rule,” she says. "Get five matches, and write to all of them. Let's say two write back. Of those two, one turns into a date. That's a good ratio! Don't just collect matches for the sake of collecting matches or for an ego boost." Which can be easy to do, given the sheer volume of singles in NYC.
One dating challenge that's specific to NYC is that filtering by location gets tricky. Set your radius too small, and you're bound to get less available matches. But setting it even a little wider means you're opening up doors to what would be considered a long distance relationship anywhere else — thanks to the fact that most New Yorkers rely on public transportation (ex. Brooklyn to Queens). Happn is a dating app that combats this by tracing your steps, and connecting you with singles who also frequent the same areas, making first dates more convenient. "Happn is an interesting app to use in N.Y.C. because it shows you how many times you've, literally, crossed paths with someone," Ettin explains. "So, that person likely has a similar interest, lives locally, or frequents the same lunch spot. I know that if I crossed paths with someone at my favorite coffee shop in my neighborhood, I'd want to meet that person." Also, if you're in need of an opener, Happn give you a jumping off point. “Try something like, ‘We crossed paths a few times at 18th and 6th. I work at the WeWork near there! How about you?' or, 'Oh, I was at the Bed Bath & Beyond a few times this week since I kept buying the wrong size sheets!' And everyone has a good, yet awkward, chuckle," Ettin says.
Billed as the “dating app for professionals,” The League has parameters set up to ensure quality over quantity. For starters, there's a wait time in order to be accepted into the app, and once you've been cleared by The League powers that be, you'll need to stay active on the app in order to continue using it. Inactive users get kicked off after two weeks, which means that the people you're matching with are actually using this thing. “The League only show a handful of matches a day, trying to encourage users to give each match more scrutiny and attention than they would on, say, Tinder or Bumble, which have seemingly unlimited choices,” says Ettin.
Granted, the way a particular dating app gets used really depends on what the pool of users on the app decide they want them for. But if you’re looking for something more serious in New York City, you’re better off going with an app that positions itself that way. “The dating app Hinge is trying to combat the challenge of finding something serious by calling itself the ‘relationship app,’ which is more a branding technique than anything else,” says Ettin. The app also aims to keep its members on good behavior by pulling from your social networks to find matches connected through the friends you have on social media — the hope being that there’s less ghosting and more courtesy as a result, since these are friends of friends of friends here.
 If you’re going to rock a beard, there’s no better place to do it than New York City — particularly if you’re living and dating in just about any part of Brooklyn. The creators behind Bristlr saw the affinity that New York women have for men with facial hair, and decided to design an app dedicated to connecting bearded men with their target audience and thus, Bristlr was born. There are some things that would only ever take off in certain places. Bristlr is one of those things. Get that beard the appreciation it deserves, stat.
If you feel like the odds of dating in New York are against you, why not opt for an app where the numbers are in your favor? As of 2016, Coffee Meets Bagel had more female users than male. In addition to having the odds in your favor, the app also limits the amount of matches that you get per day — which means members aren’t swiping left and right into oblivion without giving any thought to the eligible bachelors being presented to them each day.
The way a dating app presents itself is important. With OKCupid’s latest rebranding campaign on just about every subway platform in New York City, chances are high that eligible bachelorettes will be downloading (or re-downloading) this app to give it a(nother) try. In addition to this, OKCupid’s filter functionality also satisfies picky New Yorkers by allowing you to search by keyword to help find exactly what it is you’re looking for — whether it’s someone who you can chat about your latest Netflix binge with or someone who digs the same off-the-radar band that you do.
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Everyone has a different goal for dating. For some, it’s all about finding true love, that ride-or-die partner for life. For others, it’s just about the novelty of meeting new people. And, of course, some of you are just on the prowl for casual sex. No matter your intentions, the best dating apps in New York City can make your dreams come true.
So, which are the best, you ask. That’s easy enough to answer; they’re all below. In this article, you’ll read about the apps and sites that make dating in New York fun, interesting and rewarding. Tired of riding the A train just to find the newest Bed-Stuy hipster bar in hopes of meeting someone cute? Stop wasting your precious time and go digital.
No matter your age, sexual preference or income level, these NYC dating apps and sites will get results. Read on and let us know which one(s) you like most.
Dating apps are, by and large, solitary pursuits, designed for you to use while you’re bored and on your own. But people often find a way to bring their friends into the equation, showcasing potential matches and seeking advice. Ship is the app that understands, more often than not, your friends know you better than you know yourself.
What makes this app unique is that it lets your friends match you up with other users. Ship is for anyone who has ever screencapped a profile for a buddy or had a friend write a reply. In a digital world that increasingly creates seclusion, Ship is here to put the social back in “social media.” Do you trust your friends more than you trust yourself? Then Ship will be among the best dating apps in New York City.
Allows you to get that all-important second opinion
You can still search for matches on your own, so you aren’t completely reliant on recommendations
Even if you aren’t looking for yourself, you can sign up for an account to help a friend
Not everybody wants their friends to know so much about their dating life
The free version is very limited, so you’ll get frustrated with your matches unless you upgrade to premium
eHarmony is extremely popular here and has an amazing track record of helping New York City locals find long-term partners by using matching algorithms. This app does the best job of matching you up with compatible potential mates that we've seen.
You don't have to scroll for hours. The app does all of the tough work for you. Of course, you might not make a perfect connection outside of the algorithms. Usually, it works like magic. The toughest part is answering all of the questions. It's important because this is how they match you with other single people. You can build chemistry before you even meet.
If you're serious about finding long-term partners this is the site for you.
The best success rate out there for long-term relationships
70% of users find their future spouse within a year
Makes it pretty easy to form connections
It definitely takes more time than most to get started
Not super popular with those 18-22
XO lays it out simply: they are “the dating app with games.” It truly isn’t any more complicated than that, but it’s novel enough to help the app stand out. There are dating apps that match you to other users based on hobbies and astrological signs and personality tests. XO helps you connect through the magic of play.
On XO, you can match with someone through a mutual association or find them randomly. You can even do a “blind date” through the app. Once you match with someone, you play an online game together. It not only provides an icebreaker, but it will also help you show off your creativity and personality. If you’re someone who’s gotten bored with online dating, add a little fun to the process.
The “Blind Date” mode lets two people get to know each other before they see each other’s photos
The icebreaker games are a great way to initiate a conversation with a complete stranger
Try the “Random” feature to be connected with someone anywhere in the world
Not the app to use if you’re just looking for quick and casual sex
Combining the addictive nature of dating apps and online games can be a real time-drain
Adult FriendFinder should be your first choice when you're not looking for a relationship but still want some fun in the bedroom. We've tried a lot of different apps for this (most are awful) and only a couple have proven to work over and over. Tinder is great if you're under 25 but once you get beyond that AFF has shown the best results out of any dating site in New York we've tried, especially for guys.
One of the things we've really liked about this app is that they do a really good job of helping you find EXACTLY what you're looking for. Everyone on this site is looking for the same thing so you can save a LOT of time that you would waste on other sites. If you're 25+ and want to take someone home this is your app.
They have a massive number of users on their app (over 50 million)
We’ve seen guys have the best success using it, especially those who aren’t super good looking and didn’t do well on Tinder
It’s very straightforward and easy to use
Many users can only access via web app
The app is a little dated and not as polished as some others
Sometimes people are a little TOO upfront with what they want
You Can Try Adult FriendFinder Free!
If you're just looking for a fling or more short-term fun you need to try out Adult FriendFinder's free trial. We've spent months and months testing out the alternatives (more than 100 other sites) and haven't found anything that gives most guys more options and better results. Give it a shot!
For many women, dating in NYC is both one of the most exhilarating and exhausting experiences in life. Options are abundant and there is no end to the types of dates you can go on. However, the dating scene can also be unbelievably daunting, especially online, with a non-stop stream of potential suitors. Bumble knows the struggle. It was created to bring some calm into its users’ lives.
The app requires women to be the first to send a message. This cuts down on those inboxes full of messages from strangers; especially those, shall we say, more forward messages. Despite being a slight tweak to the standard Tinder-formula, it makes a big difference. When women feel like they have more time to breathe, dating is better all around. For everyone involved.
Ladies get more say over who they talk to and when they talk to them
Guys don’t feel obligated to make the first move because they can’t
The quality of users on the site is quite high, both in terms of looks and personality
You have to find a way to stand out, and that’s still predominantly done with an attractive picture
The friend-finder app is a nice gesture, but a complete waste of time
Match has been around so long, it can rent a car in the state of New York. And it won’t even have to pay the extra surcharge. In its quarter-century of existence, Match has consistently been one of the best dating sites in NYC. Due to it being one of the first such sites, it has a ginormous user base and unparalleled name recognition. Who hasn’t heard of Match.com?
Of course, historic popularity doesn’t always equate to current success. Many of the older sites have rested on their laurels; not Match. Every year, it releases new features to make the site more dynamic and user friendly. The app still needs some more work, but if you prefer using browsers, you’ll enjoy this site. Whatever you’re into, whatever your preference, someone on Match will fit the bill.
Possesses one of the largest user bases of any dating site, especially for older daters
Allows users to provide full, detailed bios, not just a couple pithy lines
New features like “Vibe Check” and “Date Check-in” make for a more enjoyable and safe dating experience
Popularity breeds problems: there are a lot of fake accounts on the site
The app definitely feels like an afterthought compared to the website
If you’re college-educated and focused on your career, chances are your ideal match is someone similarly serious about life. The casual encounters and one-night stands may be fun for a bit, but eventually, you’ll want the real deal. When you’ve reached that point in your dating life, it’s time to turn to Elite Singles. It’s the New York City dating app for people with ambition and dedication.
Elite Singles is the app you join when you’ve exited your wild 20s and start considering your future. The app has one of the largest userbases between the ages of 30 and 50. Plus, these users tend to be well-educated and uninterested in dumb games. It helps that the membership has a hefty price tag, all but ensuring nobody is there just to waste time.
For relationship-minded singles over 30, there are few better options for online dating
The profiles have a good amount of detail so you’re not just blind swiping
The app is well designed to showcase both photos and bios
If you don’t want to pay for a membership, you won’t get many features
No video chat option, which is quickly becoming standard
Let’s just say it: being a single parent adds an extra level of difficulty to dating. We wish it didn’t, but anybody who’s ever gone on a date with a kid at home knows it’s true. Between scheduling issues and worrying about how the other person may react, dating as a single parent is a gantlet. SingleParentMeet wants to help you run it.
Created with single parents in mind, this site helps you reclaim your dating life. There’s no feeling bad about putting your children first or worrying about on which date you should admit they exist. Your potential partners get it, and they won’t make you feel guilty for prioritizing your family. Struggling to balance children and romance? Then SingleParentMeet may be one of the best New York City dating apps.
You don’t have to deny or ignore the most important part of your life
It’s nice to date people who understand the challenges – and joys – of parenthood
The personality questions offer an entertaining way to express yourself in a little more depth
Like most sites wi
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