National Burrito Day Heist: The Burrito Bandit
National Burrito DayThe Burrito Bandit: A National Burrito Day Heist
April 4th, 2025 – What should have been a day of celebration—National Burrito Day—turned into a culinary crime spree that left burrito lovers across the country in shock.
The Crime
At approximately 11:30 AM, employees at El Grande Taqueria in Austin, Texas, noticed something strange: their entire stock of slow-cooked barbacoa, queso fresco, and handmade tortillas had vanished overnight. Security footage revealed a shadowy figure dressed in a luchador mask, loading crates of ingredients into an unmarked van.
But this was just the beginning.
Over the next six hours, reports flooded in from Denver to San Diego—beloved taquerias and fast-casual chains alike had been hit. The suspect’s M.O.? Targeting only the most premium burrito components: carnitas, house-made salsa, even an entire shipment of imported avocados.
The Clues
Investigators were baffled. The thief left no fingerprints—only a single, ominous clue at each scene: a small, hand-drawn tortilla with a bite taken out of it.
Then, a breakthrough. A food truck owner in Phoenix caught a partial license plate: 'BRT0-1.'
The Suspect
Authorities have since identified a person of interest: Lorenzo 'El Wrapido' Mendez, a disgruntled former line cook with a grudge against the burrito industry. Known for his radical belief that 'burritos should be free for the people,' Mendez had previously been arrested for distributing unauthorized breakfast burritos outside a corporate office.
The Manhunt
As of this writing, Mendez remains at large, though taquerias nationwide have beefed up security. The FBI’s newly formed Burrito Theft Division (BTD) warns the public: if you see a man in a luchador mask offering suspiciously high-quality burritos from the back of a van… do not accept the salsa.
Stay tuned for updates. And in the meantime—lock up your guac.
🔎 Got tips? Call 1-800-NO-BRRITO. 🌯
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