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40 Funny Blonde Jokes You Should Probably Never Say Out Loud
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
The best zingers in a timeless format.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
The best zingers in a timeless format.
These hilarious jokes prove that blondes really do have more fun.
To all the blondes out there, we get it. Being blonde comes with tolerating a lot, from expensive toning shampoos to the constant pressure to live up to the saying that blondes have more fun. But perhaps the most annoying part of being a blonde is enduring the never-ending stream of blonde jokes . And for that, we have a solution: Come up with a few blonde jokes of your own—or use one of these.
Whether you've got natural platinum locks or have a standing appointment with your stylist every six to eight weeks, these blonde jokes are guaranteed to make you chuckle. Because you know what? Blondes do have more fun—and these blonde jokes are here to prove it. And if you're in more polite company (or, you know, brunette company), try telling one of our dozens of hilarious clean jokes instead.
She kept throwing out all the 'W's.
"Yes," she replied. "I have one child that's just under two."
The blonde said, "I might be blonde, but I know how many one is."
She asked her friend to check. The friend stuck her head out and said, "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes…"
You give them a shampoo that says "rinse, wash, and repeat." ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb
So she made it "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofyAlbany."
So they started crying and went home.
So they can catch all the things that go over their head.
It took her months to figure out she could use it at night.
They think someone is taking their picture.
The doctor says, "Ma'am, you have a broken finger."
The box said "for two to five years" and it only took her one.
You'd think at least one of them would've seen it.
The woman on the other end of the phone says, "Just a minute…" The blonde says, "Thanks!" and hangs up the phone.
Tell her that drinks are on the house.
She couldn't figure out which number came first.
The waitress says "I'm blonde! And my coworker is blonde, too. Also, the lady sitting next to you is blonde as well. Are you sure you want to tell them?"
The blind guy says "No, I guess not. I don't want to have to explain it three times."
The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."
One blonde says to the other, "Which d
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