Mu Wife

Mu Wife
I CAUGHT my friend having sex with my wife after a drunken night out together.
I’m 36 and my wife’s 34. We’ve been married for nine years and have a daughter aged seven.
We went out with friends one night and a few of them came back for a nightcap.
My wife had been drinking quite heavily. She started nodding off so I sent her to bed. Our friends drifted off home, apart from one, an old friend of mine from school. He went to the bathroom while I started to tidy up. I suddenly heard a banging noise coming from my bedroom.
I opened the door to our room and saw my friend having sex, lying on top of my wife’s naked, unconscious body.
My wife’s arms were around him. I shouted at him to get off. My wife opened her eyes and they rolled back in her head.
I shouted again and my wife said to my friend, “You’d better stop.” He slowly got up and started to get dressed. He then walked out of the bedroom apologising. He said he didn’t know what had happened.
My wife couldn’t remember much the next day. She is embarrassed and ashamed but doesn’t want to go to the police.
She insists that nothing is going on between them. Meanwhile, I’m full of anger and rage.
DEIDRE SAYS: You’re shocked, furious and feel betrayed, and you can’t just brush this under the carpet. From the sound of it they were both very drunk.
If your wife was too drunk to give meaningful consent, it was rape clear and simple, but it is very common for raped women to feel somehow responsible, especially if they have been drinking.
If she finds it too hard to talk about this openly with you, urge her to talk to Rape Crisis ( rapecrisis.org.uk , 0808 802 9999). I doubt your friendship is going to survive this but for your daughter’s sake it is important that your marriage does.
Get Relate’s help to work through all the feelings that have been stirred up. (see relate.org.uk , 0300 100 1234).
MY dad nearly drove us both off the road in a panic when I told him I knew he’d been cheating on Mum.
My sister found some texts on his phone five years ago and it was obvious he’d been seeing somebody else.
She was 20 at the time and I was 23 and we decided not to say anything to avoid upsetting Mum.
We then had a string of silent calls to the house. Mum answered the phone one day and this woman told her everything.
My sister said she’d been sleeping with my dad for a year and that he had given her spare keys to our holiday flat.
My mum told my sister and she confessed she’d known about it for ages.
Mum said they were too old for her to do anything and she wasn’t going to leave him – they’re both 64.
Dad now has cancer and the prognosis isn’t looking good.
I’ve always been a fairly dutiful daughter but we were arguing about something unrelated in the car on the way to the hospital and I bit back at him about the affair.
Some things had gone missing from our holiday home – I knew it was this other
woman – but Dad ducked and dived and had an answer for everything.
I feel so angry that he may pass away and not admit to Mum he’s treated her badly.
DEIDRE SAYS: By all means tell your dad you think he should say sorry to your mother while he still can but if they both find denial more comfortable, you need to let it go.
Nobody can truly know what goes on in someone else’s relationship and if your mother is trying to protect herself from more hurt, that is up to her.
Your father knows the truth and it is on his conscience.
It could help to talk your feelings through with Family Lives ( familylives.org.uk , 0808 800 2222).
I ONLY found out that my partner was married when his teenage daughter turned up at our house.
I’m 45 and my partner is 48. We’ve been together for 12 years and have a five-year-old son together.
One day I was confronted by a girl demanding to see her dad. My partner came to the door and this girl went mental at him.
My partner then told me the truth – that he was married.
His daughter is 14. I felt betrayed. I keep imagining him and his wife having sex while I was on my own.
That was three months ago. I haven’t slept in his bed since.
DEIDRE SAYS: Being deceived for so long is devastating but it’s going to serve no one, least of all your son, to let your relationship freeze.
Ask him why he kept this secret. It’s no excuse but maybe he was frightened to lose you.
If you can be grown-up about this, the children might even enjoy having a half-sibling.
I TOOK an overdose when my boyfriend dumped me but he was then very sympathetic and we still have sex.
He’s got another girlfriend though.
I’m 24 and my boyfriend is 25. We were together for a few months two years ago.
We split due to my mood swings and constant paranoia.
I took the split badly and made an attempt on my life. My boyfriend was so supportive and confided in my friend that he was still in love with me.
He got back in touch with me a few months ago and we’ve had sex a few times since.
I know he still cares, but he’s going out with another girl at the moment.
Could he be scared to commit to me because of what I did?
DEIDRE SAYS: Your suicide attempt must have been very scary for your boyfriend.
I hope you are now getting the help you need. Often the underlying problem is your own lack of self-esteem.
And I worry this is leading you to have sex with him even though he has another girlfriend now.
Tell him he has to make a choice and don’t have sex with him again unless he
commits to you.
I’m sending you my e-leaflet on Raising Self-Esteem.
MY husband hasn’t so much as touched me since I gave birth to our baby boy six months ago.
I am 24 and my husband is two years older.
We have been married for three years and our relationship has always been good – until now.
I have done everything I can possibly think of to initiate sex with him but nothing works.
It is really starting to affect my confidence and I am sure our lack of
closeness will be having a bad effect on our baby.
I am especially worried because he has started coming home late – and always seems keen to get out of the house at every opportunity.
DEIDRE SAYS: Sexual guilt leads some men to find it difficult to link sex with the mother of their child.
Some can’t get the image of childbirth out of their heads or feel guilty about having put you through a painful experience.
But of course you need to talk with him about what’s going on.
Maybe he is also feeling pushed out and rejected.
Then try the tactics in my advice line Sex Play Therapy. Ring 09067 577 162.
MY ex has told our children she’s pregnant and I’m worried she will start to neglect them once the baby arrives.
We divorced three years ago. Our children are seven and five and they live with me and my lovely partner most of the time.
My ex has the kids a couple of nights a week but often says she can’t cope.
She’s had many boyfriends since the divorce, and our kids don’t even know the surname of the dad-to-be. Should I insist we meet up to discuss this?
DEIDRE SAYS: Meeting up sounds sensible. But offer extra support rather than accuse her. Is the unborn baby’s dad still about? If so, invite him too.
Family Lives can help you negotiate this tricky situation ( familylives.org.uk , 0800 800 2222).
I WAS totally shocked to discover my widowed dad has been viewing gay websites.
I’m 43 and my dad has been widowed for the past two years after a long and happy marriage.
He bought a laptop recently and I often check my emails during visits. Pop-ups for a gay website appeared last week.
I checked the browsing history and my dad had been viewing gay websites.
Should I raise it with him or ignore it?
DEIDRE SAYS: Assuming the participants were of age and the material is legal, then it’s none of your business.
Many straight men look at gay porn, so don’t jump to conclusions, and I think it will embarrass you both if you ask him about it.
Tell me what you think on my Facebook page today .
You can follow my life and sex tips on Twitter @deardeidre

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The life I knew -- the life I had with my husband -- died that night. There's no other way to describe it.
Apr 15, 2016, 11:47 AM EDT | Updated Dec 6, 2017
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It was early July, and we were on our way home after a botched date night. My spouse's mood was off, once again; this chronic melancholy, this little Eeyore cloud hanging over our lives and saturating everything in miserable little droplets. It happened all the time.
The unhappiness had put a wedge between us for years. I, the happy, bubbly, social person on one side; my partner, the quiet, brooding, isolating one. And on those rare nights we could sneak out for a meal or a drink, I would grow resentful when the Eeyore cloud starting pissing all over our parade.
"I wish you would tell me what's going on with you," I said as we drove home from the coffee shop.
"Enough of that. We've been together 22 years and you've been unhappy the whole time. Everyone can see it. The kids and I can feel it."
I sighed. "Is it me? Are you unhappy with me? With our family?"
"No, it's not you. It's not the kids. This predates all of you, trust me."
"Look," I said. "I'm tired of brushing this under the rug. I think it's time for some honesty. Nothing will get better if you don't tell me what's wrong."
"I can't," she insisted, staring straight ahead, hands firmly on the wheel.
I thought of potential big secrets and just started guessing.
"Are you gay?" I inquired. Hey, it happens, right? Maybe she wasn't as into me as my ego wanted me to believe.
"OK." And then I just threw it out there. "So, do you want to be a woman or something?"
Silence. And suddenly, I knew. But I had to ask again because I needed to hear the answer.
"You..." My voice was caught in my throat. "You're a... a woman?"
More silence. My stomach was in knots. I wanted to throw up.
"I can't talk about this," she said in the smallest, most vulnerable voice I had ever heard from her. I felt my heart break on the spot.
And I, the supportive mom of a trans child, the advocate, the ally, friend of the LGBT community, replied with an eloquent, "Oh, you have got to be f*cking kidding me!"
The life I knew -- the life I had with my husband -- died that night. There's no other way to describe it.
I thought I knew everything about my spouse. And yet, at that moment, I felt completely blindsided by the news. I didn't know this could happen twice in one family. (Our daughter, Alexis, is also transgender.) I didn't understand how someone could hide something like that from the person they'd been married to for over two decades. I didn't know how this would affect our family, the kids, his job.
I felt betrayed, hurt, devastated, angry and scared. And he, by the light of the Walmart parking lot we had stopped in, looked a perfect picture of terror and relief.
"I never thought I'd tell anyone," he said, staring down. "But I just told you."
I wanted to scream at him and I wanted to hug him, all at once. We were lost in a situation neither of us saw coming.
But that was eight months ago. I would love to tell you that, given all the experience my family has with trans issues, it's been an easy journey. It hasn't. The first few months were incredibly bumpy. I didn't think we could come back from it all.
But we did. Life with Zoe is beautiful. That's her lovely chosen name, by the way, and I helped pick it by vetoing all the ones I hated. I hated a lot of them. I'm really supportive.
Her name is now legally changed on her birth certificate, along with her gender marker. The papers came in about a week ago. Her birth certificate says "female," which means -- you guys -- I'm gay married! (Insert rainbows and plaid shirts here.)
You have no idea how many lesbian jokes I've been holding in for the last few months. Sh*t's about to get real.
This same-sex marriage revelation was a perfectly comfortable shift for me. It feels right, because we feel right. After nearly 23 years together, I finally have my whole partner, not just the part she wanted to show me. And that Eeyore cloud? It hasn't come out to play in a while.
My wife is gorgeous, witty and social now that she's finally comfortable in her own skin. We're the happiest we've ever been.
I need to give some serious props to our two sons. These guys could teach a class in resiliency, compassion and acceptance. They've embraced their mama with open arms, just as they did their sister.
And Alexis? She taught her mama to be brave like her by example, and saved her from drowning in secrets and misery for the rest of her life. What a gift that girl is.
While I know there are many horror stories out there about what happens when people come out, we haven't dealt with a single one yet. Our families, friends and neighbors have all been incredible. We're so fortunate to be surrounded by many caring, open-minded people.
And that brings us to this very day. Today is the day Zoe is coming out at work. There's much at stake here, and she's understandably nervous.
Like her daughter, Zoe has also written a coming out email to all her coworkers who don't yet know she's transgender (the ones she works closely with already know, as does HR, but there are may more people to tell). It's a big day.
After we do these two things, there's no more hiding. Zoe gets to be herself full-time. I get to say "my wife" without outing her before it's time. My kids finally get to say, "I have two moms."
We don't have to remember who knows and who doesn't know and who can't know yet because they might tell someone else, and ... well, let's just say it's been exhausting for all of us. We've been living in the closet, and it feels damn good to be busting out of it.
This is the internet, so I expect not all of you will be supportive. But believe me, there isn't a thing you could say in response to this news I haven't already thought of in the last several months. I used to worry about the shade people would throw our way, but not anymore. Our world is so full of love and support that it leaves absolutely no room for hatred or ignorance to reside within it.
Besides, on top of having both a transgender daughter and wife, I've been fully immersed in gender issues for two years now: studying research, interviewing experts, giving talks, writing articles, and connecting with thousands of families. So unless you're coming at this with at least as much knowledge as I now have, I'm probably not going to pay your negativity much mind. Just sayin'.
So why share this at all? The same reason we share Alexis' journey: I want you to learn with me.
If you learn along with me, then you won't be afraid. You won't be judgmental. You won't think families like ours are defective or weird. You'll get to know the queer parents at your kids' school instead of avoiding them. You'll invite the trans kid in your child's class over to play, like you would any other child.
And then you'll teach these things to the people in your life, whether directly or indirectly. Knowledge creates change. And then the world gets safer for Alexis and Zoe, the two bravest ladies I've ever had the pleasure of loving.
You and I are going to help make that happen, OK? Here's to the messy stuff of life, the woman I love more and more each day, and to wonderful new beginnings.

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