Mom You Good Is
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Sometimes, I’m pretty positive I’m the worst mom there ever was and that I’m the only one who’s doing this mom thing this badly.
The crazy thing about this (false) belief is that whenever I talk to most other moms, they feel the same way about themselves! What?? That can’t be, because I know I already hold the title of worst mom!
Yes, although logically we know that we’re not the worst moms ever, many of us are trying to reach an unattainable title of best mom ever.
This woman does not exist. However, I believe there are many ways we can (very constructively) become a better mom and that seeking to do so will benefit both our children and ourselves.
This is such a stacked question. Mostly because we tend to throw it out there as if there is some universal “better mom”. Who is she? What kinds of things does she do that I’m not doing? How do I just magically become her?
Maybe the answer to how to become a better mom lies in defining what a good mom is…to you.
A key idea I’ve been learning more and more (and trying to remind myself of, because I often forget) is that you determine what makes a good mom. You are the one who is measuring how well you perceive yourself to be doing.
The funny thing, for me anyway, is that it’s really not even my kids who determine what a good mom is. They love me and tell me I’m doing great even when I feel like I’m not. They don’t like me when I won’t let them eat sugar straight from the jar, even thought I know I’m doing it for their own good.
I am the one who tells myself I’m a bad mom for x, y, z. I‘m the one who allows myself to believe myself. Even if someone else thinks you’re a bad mom (which is highly doubtful), you decide whether or not to believe it.
The answer to this question is completely up to you. And it probably looks different for all of us. Here are a few weird things that make me feel like a good mom:
Do you see how those are things that are totally up to me? Maybe my kids don’t particularly like snuggle time. I know they hate taking baths. But having kids who smell like Baby Magic makes me feel like a good mom so when I don’t measure up, I start feeling like a bad mom.
(Note: I don’t feel bad about myself anytime my kids don’t smell like Baby Magic, I just feel especially accomplished when they do!)
This can be a tough one for us moms (especially us guilt driven moms) to get over. However, in the same vein of what we’ve been discussing, it’s up to them what defines a good mom.
Maybe your neighbor thinks a good mom puts her kids into every extra curricular activity they can manage. Someone else might think a good mom should want to spend as much time as possible with her kids so they resist putting their kids in every activity humanly feasible.
See what I mean about how it’s up to you? Don’t get trapped in trying to appease someone else. If you don’t care if your kid runs around in diapers all day, good on you. If you think your kids need to be dressed to the shoes with their hair neatly combed, good on you, too!
The sad reality is that, especially as moms, we tend to be our own worst critics. If we’re not comparing ourselves to other moms, we’re comparing ourselves to the things we believe we should be doing to be the best mom.
How often do you get frustrated with your kids or fail to meet some ideal that you’ve created for yourself, and, regardless of what happened the rest of the day, you honestly feel like you’re failing?
I do this a lot. I put so much energy into overthinking the things I believe I’m doing wrong and I let it overshadow the fact that I know I love my kids.
Sometimes it seems so hard and complex. But think of all you’re missing out on by focusing on how much you wish you were different. One weed in a beautiful flowerbed doesn’t spoil the whole thing. Pluck out the weed and enjoy the flowers.
The same goes for our days with our kids. Don’t miss the flowers because you’re so focused on hating the weed.
On a side note, I’m feeling guilty because I just swore at my kid for dumping water on my computer and when I opened it to dry it off, this post was up on the screen. Haha! Looks like I need to take some of my own advice!
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https://www.sahmplus.com/define-what-a-good-mom-is
Перевести · 05.08.2020 · Being a good mom isn’t about keeping the house clean and organized. It’s about the family you raise and the time you spend with them. “There is no one perfect way to be a good mother. …
https://www.simplifysomeday.com/are-you-a-good-mom
Перевести · 20.02.2019 · The Definition of a Good Mom is Up to You. A key idea I’ve been learning more and more (and trying to remind myself of, because I often forget) is that you determine what makes a good mom. You are the one who is measuring how well you perceive yourself to be doing. The funny thing, for me anyway, is that it’s really not even my kids who ...
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Перевести · 17.07.2021 · If you catch yourself wondering if you are a good mom, you need to realize that you are!The fact that you are worried about it means that you are in fact, a great mom. You also need to know that all moms struggle with the same thought, according to Everything Mom.It is natural to wonder if you are doing everything you …
https://www.sahmplus.com/good-mom-best-answer
Перевести · 29.06.2021 · You need some signs that you’re a good mom. Here are a few things that indicate you’re probably a good mom: Your kids smile, laugh and enjoy life. Your kids are polite and share. You put (at least some of) their needs ahead of your own. You …
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Перевести · 10.05.2019 · All it takes to be a good mom is to love your kids. That’s it. I’m betting that you do that. That you love them fiercely. I’m also betting that you …
https://www.entreprenistamama.com/blog-1/what-it-means-to-be-a-good-mom
Перевести · 05.05.2020 · Being a good mom isn't up for anyone else to decide, but you! If you are striving to be a magnificent mother -- and, if you're reading this post, I know you are -- then maybe what I've learned can help you …
https://www.sfgate.com/magazine/article/Are-You-a-Good-Mother-As-Good-as-Your-Mom...
Перевести · 29.07.2009 · Being a good mom gets tougher all the time. Almost three quarters of the women say that being a mother today is harder than it was when their own moms were packing the lunch …
https://www.jillemccormick.com/goodmom
Перевести · 11.05.2017 · Good Mom is a crafty creative when you don’t know how to thread a needle. Good Mom serves organic vegetables that bring her praise from her children when you go through the drive-through…again. Good Mom plays Barbie and Legos for countless hours when you…
https://www.quotev.com/quiz/2317662/Will-you-bee-a-good-mom
Перевести · 04.11.2012 · Hug and kiss your son on the cheek saying "Who ever did this to you, will get his ass kicked by me!" 2. 6. You enter into a room and you see your baby girl, coloring your ID card with a red sharpie. You: You …
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Mom You Good Is
