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11/12/21
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The relationship between a mother, daughter and sister can be an unbreakable bond, but when it comes to sharing things, there is always a limit.
However, one woman doesn’t seem to mind just how much she shares with her family members.
Self-described swinger Brook Maklin has outlined her unusual family arrangement in a few viral posts.
In the videos on the account @brookmaklin213 , the social media user can be seen with two women who she claims are her mom and her sister.
Speaking to the camera, Maklin claims that she shares her husband with her mum.
She explains: “This is my mum, yeah I let my hubby have her a couple of times a week, yeah I’m that kind of wife.”
Maklin captioned the video: “My life don’t judge #swingerlifestyle #hotmom”
And people didn’t hold back in the comments section.
One questioned: “What happens if 1 gets pregnant…you’ll have a brother, sister, nephew or niece but also stepchild.”
It is unclear whether the group of three are being serious or joking.
In another video, which she subtitled “swinger life,” Maklin claims she keeps her “man happy” by letting him “play” with her little sister too.
She adds: “Yeah, I’m that kind of wife.”
Again, it is unclear whether the group of three are being serious or joking.
However, many people have rushed to the comments section to express themselves.
Another added: “I don’t think this is what being a swinger means. This is more poly..something, multiple partner things.”
This story originally appeared on the Sun and was reproduced here with permission.
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3/15/22
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This mom is taking the birds and the bees talk to a whole new level.
Chloe Macintosh has created a guide called “First Time Sex Starter Kit” for her two teenage sons in a bid to help them — and other teens — properly prepare to lose their virginities.
The British-based entrepreneur recently launched Kama — a sexual wellness app designed to educate people of all ages on various aspects of eroticism.
The app features a special section for first-timers, which Macintosh was inspired to create with and for her sons — Felix, 16, and Elliott, 14.
“The content we wanted to put out there is more than some tips to put a condom on,” Macintosh told HuffPost. “It’s more relating to the experience and making it as relaxed and comfortable as possible.”
The kit currently takes the form of 20 different videos, in which Felix is seen talking to a sex therapist. They discuss topics from “dry humping” to “how to use your penis inside.”
Macintosh said she never spoke about intercourse with her own parents and wanted to take the stigma out of sex for her sons.
“After an initial period of resistance, Felix and Elliott started to become more used to the topic, and speaking about it became more and more normal,” the open-minded mama declared.
She told the publication it would be impossible for her sons to ignore sex, given that there are sex books, “toys” and “gadgets” scattered “everywhere” around their home.
Her boys began asking honest questions about sex, and their friends even had queries of their own. The pals wanted to know about initiating sex, choosing partners and asking for feedback from them.
The candid discussions helped Macintosh formulate the “First Time Sex Starter Kit.” She wanted the guides to include language used in teen conversations in order to make the kit more accessible and relatable.
According to HuffPost, the guide features advice on topics including oral sex, vaginal and anal penetration, hand jobs, fingering, consent and more.
Macintosh said much sex education learned in schools is not delivered in relatable language. She also alleged it is “heteronormative, binary and generally backwards and incomplete.”
She told the publication she is concerned that teens are now trying to learn about sex from online pornography, which presents an unrealistic and distorted view of intimacy.
The mom said she hopes her starter kit can plug a gap in the market.
“The fact that so many teens and young people go through the processes of dating and intimacy without proper guidance is not good enough and can be easily repaired,” she declared. “If we remove the taboo and shame from talking about sex, then authentic pleasure can come more naturally.”
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Not everyone has their needs met in a single relationship, and the only avenue for satisfying those needs within monogamy is cheating. What if there’s a much better way?
Ten months after her husband, Hal, died, Rebecca Woolf posted on Instagram that she was in a new relationship. She hadn’t meant to “‘meet someone’ meet someone,” as she put it. What the 39-year-old, newly single mother of four (and former mega-mom blogger ) meant to do was have a lot of casual sex . She ended up in a relationship anyway, she wrote, and not only that, she was continuing to date in the meantime. Then, in parentheses, “that’s for a whole other post about monogamy and how it’s not for everyone. Hi.”
The comments on the post accumulated quickly, mostly from others who felt judged for finding love quickly after loss. But privately, in Woolf’s direct messages, women responded to that last aside. They told her that they, too, wanted to open their relationships, but their husbands had refused or almost certainly would if asked.
A month later, as promised, Woolf posted a follow-up. “After speaking candidly to many via DM, I have come to realize how … women are often assumed to desire monogamy in our relationships when that isn’t necessarily the case. At all.”
This time, the comments filled with women, often mothers, often married, admitting — before God, their employers, and brands that pay influencers — that they, too, were nonmonogamous. Some of them had been for years. “My ex and I started exploring poly in the last few years of our marriage,” wrote one woman. “I realized how much I had overlooked my needs and wants to keep things calm. I realized that ‘good enough’ wasn’t good enough.”
“I had three little kids and my whole life revolved around taking care of them and working...I realized that my world had become very small,” wrote another.
“Im in a monogamous marriage with my husband, which is my personal preference, but I love hearing other people’s sexual preferences and how they explore that,” wrote a third.
In the last 20 years, nonmonogamy has become far more visible, if not quite mainstream. Consensual nonmonogamy, also known as ethical nonmonogamy, has a long history in the United States, although always on the fringes — a social experiment among the transcendentalists in the 19th century, an extension of the free love movement in the late ’60s and early ’70s, rumored swingers parties in any self-respecting suburb forever thereafter. Today, about one-fifth of Americans have tried it. Between 4% and 5% practice it , which is way less than you might think if you live in Massachusetts or Northern California, where it can seem as if at least one kid in every class hails from a polycule, and way more than you might think if you live anywhere else. There is no published data on how many parents are openly nonmonogamous.
The rationale, which runs counter to the legally enshrined family structure in every Western society, is that some people can’t get their needs met from a single relationship. The only avenue for meeting those needs within monogamy is cheating. In consensual nonmonogamy, there’s a conversation, and then, rather than ending the relationship, one or both partners begin having some type of secondary relationship.
For consenting adults, this makes a lot of sense. When you have children, some mothers are discovering, it makes even more sense. While the risks are considerable — researchers have found that stigma against nonmonogamy is “robust,” not all forms of nonmonogamy are equally satisfying, and all seem to require NASA-level organization and communication — for the women who have embraced it, the upside is higher. While they initially opened their relationships to meet their sexual needs, nonmonogamy has become an outlet that Woolf and other ethically nonmonogamous moms — nonmonoga-moms? — say makes them better primary partners and better mothers.
Polyamory (being in more than one committed, romantic relationship simultaneously), in particular, offers a pressure valve for the untenable two-earner family structure that finally broke during the pandemic. According to the women I spoke with, nonmonogamy works — even better than advertised. It works so well, you might find yourself asking: Why don’t more of us try this? Why haven’t we all along?
Erin Broderick was one of the people who commented on Woolf’s second post. She and her husband of 18 years first had sex with another couple a few months into their relationship, when they were only 19, but it felt very taboo. “I was still a staunch Republican pro-lifer at that point,” she says. The 39-year-old auto insurance adjuster from Omaha and her software engineer husband, who is from Wichita, had both gone to Catholic school; their respective sets of parents are still married. “I didn’t even know that I was bisexual until then. I was more attracted to her than I was to him. She was the one I wanted to explore a relationship with.”
As she remembers it, the encounter left her then-boyfriend (now husband) in tears. “He was like, ‘Does this mean you’re gay and you’re not going to want to stay with me because you want to be with women?’” she says. “I didn’t really have any answers for him, so mostly I was reassuring him that I definitely wanted to be with him, but that I did have strong romantic feelings for her.”
They have been dating other couples on and off ever since. “We just meet other people, form intense friendships with them, then we’re like, ‘Gosh, we really like you. And we would really like to have a romantic and sexual relationship with you.’ It just kind of happen[s] organically.” (They also meet people through OkCupid.)
Their children, ages 16, 14, and 11, know they are nonmonogamous, and while the kids don’t love hearing about it — “they want us to be like other people’s parents” — Broderick has taken care to ensure that it doesn’t impact their lives all that much. When they were younger, she says, “It was very regimented. Our dating lives with other people would take place after the kids were in bed, from 9 p.m. until midnight. Then we [would] start our day again at 7:30 a.m.”
Usually, Broderick and her husband both have a relationship with the woman. Broderick may also have a relationship with the man. (Her husband has explored sex with men but isn’t that into it.) “The big thing is, it’s not really my husband that’s super nonmonogamous. It’s me. It always comes from me.”
The prototypical couple who opens their relationship consists of a man attracted exclusively to women and a woman who is attracted to both men and woman, according to Terri Conley , a professor and social psychologist at the University of Michigan whose watershed 2017 study demonstrated that consensual nonmonogamy is as satisfying as monogamy . In another paper, soon to be published in Archives of Sexual Behavior, Conley looks at the ways that different types of ethical nonmonogamy yield different levels of happiness. Polyamorists, those who are in love with more than one person at a time, have the greatest overall relationship satisfaction. The next happiest are swingers — couples who together seek out sex with others. People in open relationships, who seek outside partners independently with the expectation that these extracurricular liaisons will not interfere with the primary couple, come in last.
The study doesn’t ultimately draw conclusions about this hierarchy of contentment, but Conley has theories. Open relationships ironically involve the least openness, which can turn them into minefields of blurry parameters and perceived betrayals. Also, such relationships often open not out of a desire to expand or enhance an already good thing, but as an attempt to fill a void. “I think sometimes they would actually prefer to be monogamous, but circumstances dictate that they’re adopting this approach,” says Conley. “They’re in a long-distance relationship, or their partner is in some way physically not able to do the type of sex they want to do.”
Swingers are happier because their extracurricular encounters are not just known to their partners, but they constitute a shared hobby that couples do together. (Golf isn’t for everyone.) Plus, swinging is associated with the highest sexual satisfaction — the entire activity is organized around seeking excellent sex — and couples who find sexual satisfaction together are generally happier. Polyamorists win because the near-constant open communication and honesty that polyamory requires is associated with better relationships of any kind.
Another of Woolf’s commenters was Kelly Knight , a 39-year-old marketing executive who lives in a house in the Bay Area with her spouse, Mike, a software engineering manager; her other partner, Adam; and Mike’s other partner, Max. Mike and Knight are legal parents to a daughter Knight gave birth to in 2016. In September, Knight had her second child, conceived with Adam, who is on the baby’s birth certificate. All four partners are raising the two kids.
If this sounds complex, it is. The biggest misconception about her lifestyle, Knight says, is that it’s driven by a voracious sexual appetite. “Of course everyone’s like, ‘You’re just slutty,’” Knight says. When she came out as poly to her conservative parents, she recalls, “The first thing my mom said to me was, ‘Oh, are you just having orgies all the time?’ I was like, ‘God, no. There’s so much more talking than orgies.’”
Parenting by committee can be especially challenging — all resentments must be talked out at a weekly meeting, “otherwise the passive aggression can kind of get out of co
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