Mom Dad And Step Daughter
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Mom Dad And Step Daughter
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operations, television, radio broadcasting, digital and online services. The Standard Group is recognized as a
leading multi-media house in Kenya with a key influence in matters of national and international interest.
Standard Group Plc HQ Office,
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P.O Box 30080-00100,Nairobi, Kenya.
Telephone number: 0203222111, 0719012111
Email: corporate@standardmedia.co.ke
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I am a third year student in campus. I have some confessions to make. My mum and my step-dad have a daughter together. My mum loves him very much and she has always favoured my step-sister over me and this has made me develop a lot of anger towards her.
We are very close with dad and I always thought he often made passes at me but did not make much out of it. Recently, we were watching a movie and ended up getting intimate and now I can't get him off my mind. He also seems to have the same problem and I think he has fallen in love with me.
I love him but I know that this will only bring trouble if my mum was to find out so I am looking for a way to end this. This is becoming difficult because I like him and the fact that we see each other daily worsens the situation. Please advise...
Now that you have gone to bed with your mother’s husband, how do the two of you behave when she is around? Even if he is your step-dad, it is still weird and unimaginable. Yes it is less weird than if it was your actual father but it is just inappropriate. I cannot even begin to imagine what I would feel if I was in your position. End this now please!
I think you are looking for a sugar daddy to spoil you by giving you money and other things. However, be in the know that you are looking at the wrong man. Suppose it was you whose daughter was sleeping with your husband? How would you feel? What would you do to your daughter? That very answer is what your mother will do when she finds out about this. And that liking and favouritism she has for your sister will increase ten times when she finds out.
Imagine getting a child with someone you are calling a father? A man who has slept with your mother? Why do you want to break her heart? This man could be having other affairs outside and could infect you even with HIV. Sleeping with somebody you call your dad is a curse to you. If you got a child with him, what would that child call your mother? Stop thinking like a girl who has never stepped inside a school, you are a Third Year student in the university. Concentrate on your studies as this man is only wasting your time.
By law, he is and remains to be your father. Your story is a bit ambiguous because it is not the resentment to your sister but the intimate love you have with your dad. The African culture and tradition do not support this and history will judge you harshly. Someone who sees your mother naked should never do that to you and at the very age you are. This is incest and an abomination. There are many single unmarried men that can date you. He is not the only remaining man on earth. Stop this to be at peace with yourself and with others.
This is one of those things in life that are just unacceptable. It is probably the highest form of betrayal you have both exposed your mother to and without a doubt, you ought to find a way to deal with this. I believe this is why you have shared your issue with us so before I give you some pointers as to how you could deal with this, let's put your sit uation in the right context.
The first and very solid fact is that no "love" can exist and grow between a girl and her father. Real dad or step dad, that man is your mother's husband and as such you remain to be his daughter. Indeed he can like you and even love you very much but not with the kind of love that would allow you to get intimate with him. You are therefore not in love with him rather you are only infatuated. It is common for girls to be infatuated with their fathers but this only lasts a short while then they grow out of it. Make no mistake about this; there can never be any true love between a girl and her father. But of course there can be many other kinds of love, just not the kind you are implying. He did this out of lust and you participated in it out of ignorance. If anything, it is in order to say that he took advantage of his daughter.
You both need to find a way of dealing with this but you cannot do this if you don't accept that what you did was unacceptable. Often, confession is the best approach to closure. However, in your situation, this may not be the best. There is no way you can continue living under the same roof with those two. Yes, it is about time you moved out and let them be as you try and find your way around this life. Living in that house will only lead you back to the same situation and the consequences are unimaginable. Have you thought about what could happen if you conceived a child with him? Have you even remotely imagined what would happen if she got wind of this matter or if she caught you in the act?
Please know that nothing good can come out of this and this is one of those situations you really need to quit while you are ahead. Talk to them about getting you an apartment so they can enjoy their marriage as you find your way through life. Yes, she may favour your sister over you but this should not be an excuse to mess her marriage. That man is not straight and it seems he can even do this with his own daughter. Like you put it, it is difficult because you see him every day of your life. Get a way out of that house and with time all this will end.
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The Standard Group Plc is a multi-media organization with investments in media platforms spanning newspaper print
operations, television, radio broadcasting, digital and online services. The Standard Group is recognized as a
leading multi-media house in Kenya with a key influence in matters of national and international interest.
Standard Group Plc HQ Office,
The Standard Group Center,Mombasa Road.
P.O Box 30080-00100,Nairobi, Kenya.
Telephone number: 0203222111, 0719012111
Email: corporate@standardmedia.co.ke
More stories to check out before you go
I am a third year student in campus. I have some confessions to make. My mum and my step-dad have a daughter together. My mum loves him very much and she has always favoured my step-sister over me and this has made me develop a lot of anger towards her.
We are very close with dad and I always thought he often made passes at me but did not make much out of it. Recently, we were watching a movie and ended up getting intimate and now I can't get him off my mind. He also seems to have the same problem and I think he has fallen in love with me.
I love him but I know that this will only bring trouble if my mum was to find out so I am looking for a way to end this. This is becoming difficult because I like him and the fact that we see each other daily worsens the situation. Please advise...
Now that you have gone to bed with your mother’s husband, how do the two of you behave when she is around? Even if he is your step-dad, it is still weird and unimaginable. Yes it is less weird than if it was your actual father but it is just inappropriate. I cannot even begin to imagine what I would feel if I was in your position. End this now please!
I think you are looking for a sugar daddy to spoil you by giving you money and other things. However, be in the know that you are looking at the wrong man. Suppose it was you whose daughter was sleeping with your husband? How would you feel? What would you do to your daughter? That very answer is what your mother will do when she finds out about this. And that liking and favouritism she has for your sister will increase ten times when she finds out.
Imagine getting a child with someone you are calling a father? A man who has slept with your mother? Why do you want to break her heart? This man could be having other affairs outside and could infect you even with HIV. Sleeping with somebody you call your dad is a curse to you. If you got a child with him, what would that child call your mother? Stop thinking like a girl who has never stepped inside a school, you are a Third Year student in the university. Concentrate on your studies as this man is only wasting your time.
By law, he is and remains to be your father. Your story is a bit ambiguous because it is not the resentment to your sister but the intimate love you have with your dad. The African culture and tradition do not support this and history will judge you harshly. Someone who sees your mother naked should never do that to you and at the very age you are. This is incest and an abomination. There are many single unmarried men that can date you. He is not the only remaining man on earth. Stop this to be at peace with yourself and with others.
This is one of those things in life that are just unacceptable. It is probably the highest form of betrayal you have both exposed your mother to and without a doubt, you ought to find a way to deal with this. I believe this is why you have shared your issue with us so before I give you some pointers as to how you could deal with this, let's put your sit uation in the right context.
The first and very solid fact is that no "love" can exist and grow between a girl and her father. Real dad or step dad, that man is your mother's husband and as such you remain to be his daughter. Indeed he can like you and even love you very much but not with the kind of love that would allow you to get intimate with him. You are therefore not in love with him rather you are only infatuated. It is common for girls to be infatuated with their fathers but this only lasts a short while then they grow out of it. Make no mistake about this; there can never be any true love between a girl and her father. But of course there can be many other kinds of love, just not the kind you are implying. He did this out of lust and you participated in it out of ignorance. If anything, it is in order to say that he took advantage of his daughter.
You both need to find a way of dealing with this but you cannot do this if you don't accept that what you did was unacceptable. Often, confession is the best approach to closure. However, in your situation, this may not be the best. There is no way you can continue living under the same roof with those two. Yes, it is about time you moved out and let them be as you try and find your way around this life. Living in that house will only lead you back to the same situation and the consequences are unimaginable. Have you thought about what could happen if you conceived a child with him? Have you even remotely imagined what would happen if she got wind of this matter or if she caught you in the act?
Please know that nothing good can come out of this and this is one of those situations you really need to quit while you are ahead. Talk to them about getting you an apartment so they can enjoy their marriage as you find your way through life. Yes, she may favour your sister over you but this should not be an excuse to mess her marriage. That man is not straight and it seems he can even do this with his own daughter. Like you put it, it is difficult because you see him every day of your life. Get a way out of that house and with time all this will end.
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Resources for Parenting Tweens & Teens
I am a part of a blended family. My husband is the father of two great kids and we all mesh together pretty well. Don’t get me wrong, we have our ups and downs every now and then, but all families do, especially families with tweens and teens! Step-parenting in a blended family can be tricky and it seems to become even more so when a tween or teen is involved.
Tweens and teens have a long relationship with their birth parents and may be hesitant to embrace a new (step) parent. They are also going through major social, emotional and physical changes as they move from childhood to adulthood, which is already challenging without adding an additional parent figure to the mix. Tweens or Teens whose parents divorce or remarry during their adolescence, when they are focused on themselves, can be especially hard hit.
My step-daughter, “J” is 11 and she has been pretty candid with me about what works, what doesn’t, and what she would like her Dad, Mom, and me (her step-mom) to know. Not too long ago, J and I sat down for an interview. She talked about many things: her mom and dad each dating new people; how it was when she knew “something was up” between her dad and me; being involved with our wedding planning; her own views on marriage (she is going to be very picky!); and her experience of realizing that her parents were not going to get back together. Based on her experience, she also gave me some rules for blended families. Not surprisingly, good co-parenting education programs that are proven to work (such as Children in the Middle or Parents Forever) reinforce what J had to say.
When all parents and step-parents are sensitive and put the needs of the children first, being part of a blended family, even through the teen years, can be a wonderful experience. I know that I wouldn’t have wanted to miss out on the chance to be “J”’s step-mom.
Rachael Loucks is a Family Living Agent with the University of Wisconsin Cooperative Extension. Her philosophy is that parents are their child’s first, and most important, teachers. She enjoys spending time with her family riding horses, reading, watching movies, and attending tractor pulls. She belongs to a blended family and enjoys the challenges and joys step-parenting can bring. There are three children in Rachael’s family, ages 8, 11, and 1 ½.
Website feedback, questions or accessibility issues: anne.clarkson@wisc.edu .
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My Relationship With My Dad Changed After My Mom Died
Here’s what I learned about embracing a new dynamic with a surviving parent.
Your Name Your Email Recipient Email Enter a Message I read this article and found it very interesting, thought it might be something for you. The article is called My Relationship With My Dad Changed After My Mom Died and is located at http://modernloss.com/my-relationship-with-my-dad-changed-after-my-mom-died/.
Your Name Your Email Recipient Email Enter a Message I read this article and found it very interesting, thought it might be something for you. The article is called My Relationship With My Dad Changed After My Mom Died and is located at http://modernloss.com/my-relationship-with-my-dad-changed-after-my-mom-died/.
Candid conversation about grief . Beginners welcome.
Paris and her dad, Jason, living together in quarantine. (Courtesy of Paris Rosenthal)
When I was nine, my dad and I started taking Taekwondo lessons together. After a couple years of hard work and patience, we both earned our black belts. This experience laid the foundation for my grit. Having two older brothers, playing team sports competitively, and practicing basketball with my dad regularly didn’t hurt in building my physical strength, either.
But no Taekwondo training, challenging soccer games, or fake wrestling matches with my brothers could have toughened me up mentally as much as what happened a few days after my 20 th birthday. Two years beforehand, during the first week of my freshman year of college, I received an unusual call from my parents: My mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. “We are optimistic,” they calmly relayed to me and my brothers. A year and a half later, she died in home hospice.
As an avid writer and creator throughout her life, my mom could not fathom leaving this world without completing one final project. So, just ten days before she died, her now-viral article You May Want to Marry My Husband was published in the Modern Love section of the New York Times. One year later, in 2018, my dad, Jason B. Rosenthal, wrote a response of sorts titled My Wife Said You May Want to Marry Me . He then continued to share his story and help others around the world find resilience in their own grief. All this, in spite of his being a lawyer, not a professional writer, and the fact that sharing his feelings publicly was not typical of him.
Before my mom got sick, my dad was an introverted nine-to-five, six days a week personal injury lawyer. Back then, I had just entered college without knowing what I wanted to study or what career I wanted to pursue. While we were both utterly consumed by her death, this helped my dad and I find clarity in how we wanted to spend our time going forward.
At my university, students created their own major in the form of a question and mine was: How do we address death? I also began to give public speeches about my experiences as a young motherless daughter, and, over the summer, I worked at an ovarian cancer non-profit. Concurrently, my dad veered away from his law practice and instead devoted his time to speaking internationally about the experience of losing his wife.
What I am now realizing is that with no explicit intention to do so, my dad and I have been partners in our shared, yet highly personal, grieving journeys. Immersing ourselves in the “world” of death was how we both naturally coped. As a result, we grew even closer to each other.
Immersing ourselves in the “world” of death was how we both naturally coped. As a result, we grew even closer to each other.
Today, there are things that my dad and I talk about and do together on a daily basis that weren’t part of our relationship before my mom died. My dad tells me about the challenges of being a single parent, and I open up about details of my own romantic relationships and friendships. Over time, this dynamic has grown to feel normal.
While I am still learning to nav
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