Mom Cheats Dad To Satisfy Son
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in August I went on my moms phone and caught that she was cheating and I have kept looking on her phone and she's still cheating. She is always saying she's going out with her friends but i know she's cheating on my dad. I brought it up to her and she slapped me and told me I dont know shit and not go on her phone. I dont know what to do. I can't tell my Dad because I dont have any solid proof without her phone and now she is deleting all of the evidence. My brother had also caught her on the phone in her car talking to other men. I dont know what to do.
My Mom is Cheating on my dad? What should I do?
Its really your parent's business. But the fact that both you and your brother know about this and didn't tell your father will be held against the both of you later. What really bothers me is when your mother slapped you across your face. Shows she cannot reason and gives up to temptations.
Some mobile companies have all the histories recorded once you login to the user's account online showing all text messages and all call histories that cannot be deleted.
There are 2 options you can do.
1. Pretend not to know and wait until your father finds out.
Or
2. Both you and your brother tell your father. Let him do some investigation as your mother deletes evidence from her phone.
Once you tell your father, there might be a possibility for separation or divorce.
It sucks i am sorry, but it's best not to get involved. I really think the fact that she slapped you is even worse. That also tells me that you can't reason with her. I'm so sorry
79 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
You should talk to her and tell her that if she doesn't talk to your dad about it then you will
My advice is, be in a good relationship with ur dad, do not tell him anything about what you have seen. Ask him if he loves your mom and ask questions but DO NOT tell him what you have seen. Your mom will eventually understand that you are on his side. Then, she will have to come clean, as long as you don't have evidence, there is no point discussing it with him. understand?
If you think that is bad. Imagine when your dad finds out (and he will) cheaters always slip up. And he finds out you knew a didn't say anything. It would feel like you would be picking a side by telling him but it the grand scheme of it all... It's never a bad thing to do the right thing. Even if it sucks sometimes.
Picture your husband one day did that to you. And one of your children knew. Would you want them to tell you? Cheating is the biggest and most selfish betrayal. Especially to your dad, to you and your brother.
She didn't just cheat on your dad. But on to you as well and the rest of your family.
My ex wife cheated on me and we had a little boy together. Now it's just me and my son. I am happy.
Im sorry your wife cheated on you and Im glad you are happy now with your son ๎ Thank you for you advice its very helpful especially from someone who has experienced being cheated on it gives me a better perspective. It just sucks having to choose sides between my parents.
I know. I was forced when I was little when my parents got divorced. I'm not sorry for being cheated on. We are more happier this way. I'd feel bad if I have did something wrong. I live guilt free. ๐ I'm sorry for you though. You were basically forced into a situation that no one would ask for. My heart goes to you, your brother, and your dad.
Don't look at it as you having to choose between them. Your mom made that choice not you.
I found out my mom is cheating on my dad. What should I do?
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My mom is cheating on my dad, she doesn't know I caught her. My dad is suicidal, should I tell him or not? Please, help me?
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2.5K opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
It's their problem , not yours. Get some popcorn for this show
i dont consider it a show it has really stressed me out and really breaks my heart
Take a mental distance from what happens.
There's a number of reasons why your Mum is cheating on your father! It could be that she's bored in her marriage and needs to spice up her life, your father isn't having sex with her and looking after sexual needs, she may be feeling lonely etc...
Best to keep out of it because you don't want to be in the middle of the storm that might happen if your Mum gets caught out by your Dad!
You don't need an ounce of proof. Your dad will believe you and confront your mom which will most likely cause a whole lot of fighting and drama but it's better than living day to day knowing that your mom is pulling some stunt like this
Just get with your brother and tell your dad what transpired. Tell him you know you don't have proof, but your experience should be enough. Then step back and allow him to decide what to do next
Realize she is your mom if u agree or not ur little ass goin to be her spittn immage so learn how she cheats be there to know how she gets causght u go tell u fuk urself with both parents keep tht mouth zipped so ur dad doesn't resent u but watch her down fall so u dnt do tht later
62 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
Gatheryhe proof in first place and then talk to her (without letting her know that u have the proof)... get to know what her intentions are and then decide whether to tell your dad or not
Make sure its on her phone screen shot and send to yourself to show dad or just tell your dad once you know its on her phone. Its not fair to him he needs to know.
372 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
tell your father. by not telling him... well, it's basically a threesome-meaning, you become just as guilty
i know i will be guilty for knowing and not telling or telling either way
It is difficult but stay out of it. She is your mother but she is also a woman who has needs sadly your father many not be giving what your mother wants..
100+ opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
I wouldn't do anything. Not your business and eventually, your dad will find out anyway. This way you're not involved in it, aside that it's your parents.
which is why she's involved-kids are always involved-and what's more-she knows
@Sabretooth but it's not her place to say or do anything is my point.
@Sabretooth Still not her place. But we'll have to agree to disagree I can see already ๎
it shouldn't be-but sometimes, life forces otherwise. she now-by saying nothing-she bbecomes just as guilty as her mother
She should talk with her father. It is far worse in the long run to be forced to keep the secret than the chaos that could result. The mother is doing something despicable and doubling down on her bad behavior by not coming clean when caught by the kids. The mother not coming clean expecting the children to live with this secret is a form of child abuse. Kids should not be forced to live in a toxic environment. She should tell her father now before it gets worse. If the mother cares she will come clean and try to work things out. Otherwise if it gets bad hopefully the father will protect his kids from the mothers deceit and lack of a conscious
@TXKen agreed. Now, she has a responsibility to to tell her father-I hate that's such responsibility has been forced into her lap.
I wouldn't say a responsibility because the child is blameless in this situation. I just think in the long run talking to the father will do less harm to her and her brother and hopefully get them out of the situation faster.
@TXKen not if the child knows-then, the child is knowingly keeping secrets
It shouldn't be like this-but in my experience- the word parents are often mean roommates
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Does this guy like me or is he just being friendly?
501 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
You know she's seeing others.
What you may not know is why, or what the nature of the intimate relationship between your parents is.
I dont think my parents are separated. I think it would be fair if they told me at least
I didnt' suggest they were separated.
You don't know if your father has stepped out for years. You don't know if he stopped sleeping with her years ago. You don't know if they have an agreement or not. If you don't want to ask those questions, drop it. If you DO want to know, then ask your mother why.
๎ฒ listen to this man, kid. he told it well.
you don't know the reasons behind the act. behind every cheating there's one.
people telling you here to speak to dad (you should shock him? really? that's really a clever advice...)
my advice: it's not your business. if you wanna talk about it - ask your mom. what makes her to do it? or, at least she can give you an answer, what could make you relax, and then deal with your life.
@LunaJ agree I would not jump to speaking to the dad first. If you want to wade in you talk to your mother first. And if she basically says BS and your dad is a good husband being mistreated you considered teling her you wonโt keep it a secret and she needs to say something or end it, or you will. But if the dad is completely neglectful or abusive maybe you just accept theyโre married in name and let it go.
Is best to let him find out on his own rather than you telling him because your mother would not like you for telling him but if you prefer your dad tell him
500+ opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
its easy get one your girlfriends to hook up with your dad...
1K opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
Just tell your dad. And then stay out of it.
The best thing is to do nothing. If you do anything, you will have to pick one parent to support and lose the other parent.
739 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
tell your dad what you know and what has happened. leave the rest to him
Till your dad he has to know and leave it to him
597 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
Tell him and things will work out for the best
59 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.
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What's it like when you think one of your parents is having an affair? Radio 1 Newsbeat's been chatting to a 25-year-old who spent years suspecting his dad was cheating on his mum - going through feelings of anger, denial and sadness. He's decided to tell his story, anonymously, to try and help others who're going through the same thing.
I was 19, and had just got back from a festival.
I went into the bathroom and saw a phone on the side of the bath.
I knew it was my dad's - it was the same phone I'd noticed in his car years before, when I was in my early teens.
Back then I was too young to think anything of it.
I picked it up - there was no passcode.
As I started looking through, I saw texts from a woman.
I almost couldn't take any of it in, because I was so angry.
Everything started unravelling in front of my eyes.
I had a shower, calmed down a little bit, then went into my room.
I heard my dad coming up the stairs, so I called him in, and showed him the phone.
His initial reaction was: "I don't know what you're talking about."
He took the phone and went downstairs.
Then he came back up with the dog lead and said: "Right, let's go for a chat then."
On the walk, I was nervous. I didn't really confront him very hard.
He basically passed it off as a friend from work who was helping him go through a hard time at work.
"I haven't got many friends, and I didn't think your mum would understand if it was a woman," he said.
In my head at the time, I was basically trying to justify what he was saying.
He thanked me for reacting well to it, and that was it.
Fast forward two years, and I still had it in the back of my head.
My dad was helping me move into a new flat.
He'd just got a new iPhone, and took a photo of me and sent it to someone.
Later on I texted my mum, asking if he'd sent the photo of me to her. She was like: "What? I didn't get a text from dad."
That triggered something in my brain.
I walked back to him, and saw he was texting someone called Amos.
I knew it was a disguised name, because I would know if he had a friend called Amos.
Dad was staying at mine for the night and I knew I had to get hold of his phone.
So in the middle of the night, I did a Matrix-style crawl across the room, grabbed it and started to go downstairs.
My dad came out of the room and said: "Can I have my phone back please?"
I just made up an excuse about needing it to set up an alarm call.
The next morning, we went for breakfast and then he left - nothing was mentioned.
Another six months passed, with everything bubbling away in my head.
I was walking to the restaurant with mum and dad. We were going to meet my younger sister - but she was running late and dad was getting impatient.
He turned around and started to storm off back home.
I was getting really angry, and followed after him, shouting, calling him a coward.
Suddenly it just came out of me: "Who's Amos?"
He turned around, and his face was totally white.
He basically kept ignoring the question, saying: "Stop talking about this."
Back at the house, neither of us had a key to get in. It was so awkward and I just burst into tears and gave him a hug.
He knew that I knew something was going on - but we still didn't talk about it.
My mum and sister thought we'd just had an argument. I felt like I couldn't tell my sister because she was still at school.
Alison Cooper, Relationship Counselling Service
Feeling alone and carrying a burden is awful.
If you're in a similar position, you can access relationship counselling for support. Seeing a GP is an option if someone is feeling anxious or panicky.
If you're still at school, college or university, it's worth confiding in a teacher. They would then understand if your behaviour or studies changed during that time.
You could try approaching another family member such as an aunt or uncle and ask them to speak to the parent.
Ultimately I feel having someone you could talk to who would help normalise all those feelings which are associated with loss, would help navigate an incredibly difficult time and help accept that this was not your responsibility.
About two years later, I got a text from my sister saying: "Can I give you a call?"
She was absolutely bawling her eyes out.
"Oh my God, dad's cheating on mum," she said.
Like me, she'd got suspicious about his phone and seen the texts to "Amos".
At that point, I felt almost relieved to hear it.
I decided to confront him over the phone.
"Me and my sister both know," I said. "You need to tell mum, otherwise it's going to be very difficult for me to have any kind of relationship with you."
Then at the end of the call he said: "Thanks for telling me."
He didn't speak to my mum straight away.
He didn't even talk to my sister about it, who lived at home at the time.
After three months, he still hadn't told her.
I was at the point where I really wanted to punch my dad.
He was driving me to the train station once, and I just went off on one in the car.
That night, he sent me a text: "I'm leaving tonight, I've left a note in the wall clock. I've asked your sister to get it out on Friday."
I kind of resent him for doing it that way.
But after three months of my sister having to live in a house with them both, I just didn't really care how he did it.
By the time I got to the house, mum had already opened the letter. And that was it.
It's a pretty horrible way to find out after 25 years of marriage.
I don't really have any regrets about how it unfolded.
I think that weirdly, I did everything I could.
I didn't want to be the one that told my mum.
She's not angry with me for knowing all that time - in fact, she was mortified by the fact I'd had to go through that.
I have two main pieces of advice for people going through this.
Firstly, take a step back before doing anything rash.
There were a couple of times where the red mist descended for me - doing things like taking a shower just help me calm things down.
Second, it really helped me to be able to speak to someone privately.
Me and my sister still get on each other's nerves, but it's definitely made our relationship stronger.
The hard thing is how dad's behaved since mum found out.
He'd not been paying her the maintenance and things like that, making life extremely difficult for her.
Little things like demanding my mum return a computer that he'd been given by her parents once for Christmas.
I rang him and told him to stop - my sister got involved too.
The next day, he sent us both a text saying he thought it was best we don't stay in touch.
Mum and dad are getting divorced - and I think he's with the other woman. I'm still working on what relationship we might be able to have in the future.
If you need any help with family relationships, you can click the BBC Advice pages.
Listen to Newsbeat live at 12:45 and 17:45 every weekday on BBC Radio 1 and 1Xtra - if you miss us you can listen back here.
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