Mistress Punishments
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Mistress Punishments
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Discipline comes in all shapes and sizes.It is a part of molding a submissive’s behavior and making corrections when they step out of line. Punishment though is a different beast. Punishment is for very severe infractions. I consider this to be things that could be deal breakers or relationship-enders. Punishment of this caliber should be rare or not at all. These differences are discussed and explored in the following series.
Punishment is one of those areas which is not what it seems. Before you can develop tools or methods of punishment you have to look at the concepts behind the issue itself.
Punishment is one of those areas which is not what it seems. Before you can develop tools or methods of punishment you have to look at the concepts behind the issue itself.
Every submissive I know, including myself, hate to get into trouble, but it's going to happen. We have to admit that there will be times of backsliding, pushing limits and general disobedience in our learning. It's a part of growth. Don't think of punishment as something bad, but as something to help us grow inward.
Every submissive I know, including myself, hate to get into trouble, but it's going to happen. We have to admit that there will be times of backsliding, pushing limits and general disobedience in our learning. It's a part of growth. Don't think of punishment as something bad, but as something to help us grow inward.
It seems that no matter how long you've been doing this thing we call submission, there are times of rebellion, confusion, frustration and just not getting it right.
It seems that no matter how long you've been doing this thing we call submission, there are times of rebellion, confusion, frustration and just not getting it right.
Discipline and Punishment. The words are far from the same however some dynamics treat them the same. In fact, for the longest time, I have used the word punishment when I mean discipline. It’s even possible that Master has used these words interchangeably as well. I’ve done some thinking to try to sort out what these two words mean in our dynamic and how they are employed. I have a preference for clearly defined terms and boundaries so these two words are worth defining.
Discipline and Punishment. The words are far from the same however some dynamics treat them the same. In fact, for the longest time, I have used the word punishment when I mean discipline. It’s even possible that Master has used these words interchangeably as well. I’ve done some thinking to try to sort out what these two words mean in our dynamic and how they are employed. I have a preference for clearly defined terms and boundaries so these two words are worth defining.
A common tool for Dominants in their punishment arsenal is removal. You can be removed from the activity and sent to a time out area. For me, that's the kitchen. Ugh. I hate when I'm banished there.
A common tool for Dominants in their punishment arsenal is removal. You can be removed from the activity and sent to a time out area. For me, that's the kitchen. Ugh. I hate when I'm banished there.
I'm going to talk about a submissive's mindset when it comes to repeat patterns in behavior and why we just can't keep our feet on the straight and narrow.
I'm going to talk about a submissive's mindset when it comes to repeat patterns in behavior and why we just can't keep our feet on the straight and narrow.
We all have those little voices in our head that tell us what to do. Sometimes it tries to convince us that our disobedience is okay. The voices are very convincing at times and then we have guilt riding with us until we come clean.
We all have those little voices in our head that tell us what to do. Sometimes it tries to convince us that our disobedience is okay. The voices are very convincing at times and then we have guilt riding with us until we come clean.
In this video series, I define terms that readers have asked me about! This one is the comparison of funishment and punishment. Do you have a term you'd like defined? Let me know.
In this video series, I define terms that readers have asked me about! This one is the comparison of funishment and punishment. Do you have a term you'd like defined? Let me know.
Having a hard time getting past being angry with your Dominant when you've been punished? Mrs. Darling provides some great advice on processing your emotions surrounding corporal punishment.
Having a hard time getting past being angry with your Dominant when you've been punished? Mrs. Darling provides some great advice on processing your emotions surrounding corporal punishment.
He's hesitant to continue the discussion on rules he would like for me to follow due to the fact that punishment for these rules would be hard due to lack of privacy. Any suggestions about discreet punishments?
He's hesitant to continue the discussion on rules he would like for me to follow due to the fact that punishment for these rules would be hard due to lack of privacy. Any suggestions about discreet punishments?
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Imagine that you are a prisoner held in a reformatory and I am the Wardress! You have committed some infraction of the rules, it doesn't matter how minor a breach of the regulations - you are going to be punished. Harshly.
Or maybe you've been found guilty and sentenced by the courts and you've been sent to a facility that deals with "special treatments".
If this were a real life scenario do you think that the Wardress would consider giving you a warm-up? Or a safe word perhaps? Maybe she would stop if she thought the punishment was too harsh? I don't think so - and that's just how this session works. No warm-up, no safe word and once you've been sentenced that's what you're going to receive.
All the documentation is in place; I'll have your prison record, social workers' reports and medical officer's evaluation on your mental and physical capability to receive this "special treatment", the Judge's verdict and possibly recommendations from the CPS.
What have you done to merit this punishment? Well it could be anything from masturbating in public to fraud and theft. The Judge decides the sentence in your absence and I simply carry it out. It's nothing personal; I'm just carrying out my duty, just doing my job. You could be punished with a whip or a cane. There will be a mandatory 72 strokes but the number of strokes you'll receive has already been decided - it'll probably be more; a lot more.
You will be led into the punishment room to receive your sentence. You will not be allowed to speak unless spoken to; you will keep your head bowed at all times. Your clothing will be removed and you will be given prison uniform to wear during your stay. You will then be strapped into the bench or whipping frame and given a minute to collect your thoughts and for silent prayer. While you ponder your fate I shall practice my swing with either cane or whip.
You will be expected to accept punishment with fortitude and stoicism - good old-fashioned British qualities. The strokes will be given at an even tempo with time to recover between each stroke. Whichever ordeal you're ordered to endure be warned it's a very severe session! And I will dehumanise you.
Am I unnecessarily cruel? Of course I am. As there are no witnesses to the punishment I can add on extra strokes if I want without anyone knowing - for my own amusement.
Human Rights? Don't waste your breath because quoting that will definitely earn you extra strokes. You have no rights here because you're prison scum and will be treated as such. If you want to complain about your human rights being violated, then you'll have to complain to me. And if you want to call to God for help? Well rest assured that God is not going to come to help the likes of you; only I can help you and I'm not a liberal minded do-gooder so I'm not going to help you either.
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Get A Convincing Open Letter To Send To A Prospective Dominant The easy way to get your partner to think about trying a Female Dominated Relationship
I am reaching out for some help. I have written a piece that I’d like reviewed by women in order to get their feedback. If you feel you’d like to help, could you email me at femalereverence@gmail.com where I can send you the piece and listen to your thoughts. Many thanks, Peter.
Get A Convincing Open Letter To Send To A Prospective Dominant The easy way to get your partner to think about trying a Female Dominated Relationship
Being a mistress or domme doesn’t often come with boundaries. Your sub doesn’t reach the threshold of the bathroom and declare himself in a ‘ female led relationship exclusion zone’ if he wants to get away.
The domme and sub dynamic of a female led relationship is almost impossible to contain within the confines of walls, and white picket fencing.
There will be times when you are out in public, among citizens and strangers, or amongst friends and family.
For many, they want their agreement of female dominance to encompass their time out, but it comes with an inevitable problem.
Many in the vanilla world may not understand, and amongst friends and family, it can be loathsome to the point of rebellion to get a sub to openly be flaunted as submissive .
Some things in life are thought natural and can be hidden amongst acceptable behavior. A gentle femdom wife at a party, asking her husband to kiss her with a raised eyebrow, just looks to onlookers like a loving gesture. When the husband kisses her it looks like an affectionate act. Only the couple might know that he hates public displays of affection, and that raised eyebrow was a ‘do it or punishment will ensue’ look.
Or maybe among good friends at dinner, that same gentle femdom wife, puts a bit of food on her fork and politely asks her husband what he thinks of it. Only they know that he will do it, and will not refuse. Again a polite request, which is no request at all.
They are intuitive signals that look normal and your female led relationship can be kept private.
But the world is complex, and situations can be fluid and volatile. Simple intuition will sometimes not be enough to control a sub in public.
The answer is to have secret signals. Little prearranged comments or bodily actions that convey meaning. Subtle, easily disguised mannerisms that give an instruction for your sub to follow.
Nothing too complicated here. It’s an instruction issued by the dominant female, whilst in public in order to convey a prearranged order.
They can come in many forms, either verbal , prearranged acceptance, or body language .
One isn’t necessarily better than the other but the implications are all the same, the mistress wishes some action to be taken by the sub and is conveying that through non-direct verbal means.
A female led relationship is a very private matter. It is also almost entirely misunderstood by those who do not participate in one.
There are many places where the public knowledge of such an arrangement might be detrimental, either professionally speaking or from within one’s own personal life.
The subservient may be taunted, and the mistress may be thought of as cool if the arrangement were to be made obviously public.
A male subservient to his wife’s authority in private may hold authority professionally that would be diminished.
So secret signals between the dominant mistress and the submissive male are necessary in order for the female led relationship to continue outside of private arrangements. Being in the company of friends does not absolve him from his submissive duties.
Which brings us on to another question, how exactly do you convey all this stuff, and what exactly may you want as an instruction.
Often something simple like a raised eyebrow can be a secret signal. It’s not necessary to complicate it.
What it means is “do what I am asking”.
Now, there needs to be an understanding of the sub, from mistress here. She cannot go up to her husband at his works party and demand he crawl around after her. She will get a hard limit refusal.
But often, a mistress can inflect the eyebrow to convey intent. Out shopping, she can ask politely if he hold her bag for a second while holding his gaze. It’s not a request, and they both know it. Maybe it’s just practical, while she picks up clothing items, but it can also be because he doesn’t like it and she is teasing him.
Even amongst friends, a look and a “could you get me another drink” is taken as the instruction it is. Punishments ensue for not doing what is requested.
Again, subtle and authoritative intuitively.
However, more often than not a signal needs to be sent where the meaning might not be clear or is immediately obvious. Ambiguity might be an issue for certain instructions.
So for that, you need a secret signal. A verbal or other code that relays mistress’ true intent.
So what secret signals might a mistress need, and why she might want them needs to be identified.
Below is a list of the instructions you may want to consider incorporating into your own female led relationship.
Stop Talking – At the issuance of this command the sub is to desist from talking, or providing input.
When the mistress senses that the sub is confusing matters, or just needs him to be quiet this order can be issued.
Or indeed mistress may not want a certain subject brought up, and issues this immediately to stop unwanted information becoming public knowledge.
In a certain setting like purchasing goods, mistress might be listening and the sub may be distracting what mattress wants to know, so issues the order so she can ask what questions she wants, uninterrupted.
At other times the mistress can do it so she can speak, or correct information in company.
Mistress has blanket authority to issue this command.
Personally, as a prearranged command, any mention of the throat, or the touching of the throat means to desist from verbal communication.
Start talking – Obviously, the order countermanding the above. Mistress is now letting you speak.
One thing to note here is that the sub should take into account what was happening at the time of the order to stop talking. If it was simply chatting to a stranger, then it may have been just because she wanted to make a point, but if it was in company, the sub should ask himself what was I talking about. Was I about to reveal something mistress didn’t want to be discussed. Safe to change the topic when you are permitted back to speak again.
Personally, this can be released by mentioning throat lozenges, an eyebrow inflection, or mistress asking a question that requires a verbal response.
If mistress says “So, what do you think dear?” she is relinquishing the sub from the order.
Permission to speak – Slightly different, in that it specifies permission to speak, but the sub is to avoid controversial topics.
This is highly useful for a mistress attending parties where they might not know many people, and her sub has some views that may offend others.
Religion and politics are to be avoided normally.
Don’t agree to that – During the course of chatting, especially to friends and acquaintances it’s not unnormal to arrange or at least schedule an activity.
People talk, and people interact. Simple as that.
Occasionally an idea about an activity will get floated, like being asked to go fishing next weekend, or would you both like to come round next Friday evening for a meal.
In the normal course of events you may pleasantly say yes, or look at each other, and say yes.
Well, for this mistress has a code. Maybe there is a word she doesn’t use very often, like awesome.
So if you are asked if you want a meal next Friday and your mistress says “that sounds awesome”, only you and she knows the true meaning.
Normally it means to think of an excuse and say we can’t make it. This allows your mistress to retain the high ground.
Change Topic – If you are talking and see this command, or indeed hear it, you are to change the topic rapidly, and not answer questions that follow up.
This is a way for a mistress to obviously stop unwanted information coming out, or to deflect from something she wishes to avoid.
Sometimes the submissive is starting a story mistress wishes not to be discussed. The submissive will obey the order, but others in your company might try and pry what you were going to say. The submissive needs to deflect unwanted follow-ups.
Butler request – This is issued when she requires a quick, and simple attentive need, and often the eyebrow flick can do this, but a short phrase can have a similar meaning, as can say touching her watch.
It’s often accompanied with a suggestive action like wiggling an empty drinks glass or holding up her coat and saying “ I wonder where I should put this” (ie go and find a place for my coat)
Check phone – My wife and I have a very specific messenger app we use for her instructions. Sometimes what she wants to be done can’t easily be conveyed, and she needs a more thorough instruction.
She will thus type it out and send, but of course, you are not always checking your phone, especially in certain circumstances.
When my wife says “Did I just hear your phone go?” I can quickly get it out and check. I can make excuses if necessary, but the implication is clear. Read what I have sent you and do that ASAP unless otherwise instructed.
Ignore the politeness – When my wife says “if you don’t mind” in a sentence, I am to ignore the fluff, caveats, and politeness.
Typically it will involve stripping out the sentence to focus on the request contained within and obeying that.
“Oooh honey, there you are, meet Karen and Bob. I’ve nearly run out of wine and need another one soon. The bar looks a bit busy, do you think it’ll clear soon? I will leave you lot here chatting if you don’t mind”
I know to sort through that sentence and understand the instruction, which is she needs another drink and wants it now. There was a lot of fluff in there, but the instruction is clear.
“No need honey, I will get you it, I’ll be back in a minute – large white wine isn’t it?”
I want to leave – This is the instruction to leave the current situation or environment. Issued by my mistress whether she has just bumped into someone she knows, or at a party and wants to go home.
Mistress could be with very good friends and doesn’t
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