Men Having Loud Orgasms
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Men Having Loud Orgasms
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Kick your pleasure into overdrive with a few simple tricks.
Orgasms feel differently for everyone, and can happen in a variety of ways, from P-in-V intercourse to prostate massage to nipple play . But if there's one thing we can all agree on, it's that an orgasm represents the pleasurable peak between the build-up and release of sexual tension. Translation: It feels freakin' amazing. But when it comes to pleasure, more is definitely more, and there are plenty of techniques to hack your way to more frequent and all-around better orgasms.
Boosting the frequency and intensity of the male orgasm comes down to three factors, sex educator Kenneth Play says in Men's Health Best. Sex. Ever.
"One is: Are you getting the tactile sensation or stimulation that you need in order for your unique brain and body to have an orgasm?" he says. "The second thing is: Are you having the right context that arouses you? Sex is such a contextual thing. Like, to have your butthole touched by a doctor examining you is very different than a lover touching your butthole; it’s the exact same touch, but the context really dictates the experience. The third part is about mindfulness. Are you paying enough attention and connecting with your partner that you’re experiencing it fully?"
The more you practice maximizing your orgasmic experience using the tips and techniques below, the better it'll feel to cum every time.
"There’s a compound interest," Play says, "just like the more fit you get, the easier it is to work out."
We talked to sex experts and evaluated the latest research to recommend the best ways to strengthen the male orgasm. Here are 13 simple strategies to take your orgasms from good to great, whether you're masturbating or getting down with a partner.
If you haven’t already been introduced, meet your taint—or your perineum , if we’re getting technical. It’s the strip of skin between your balls and your butt, and it’s one of many highly erogenous zones that responds well to sexual stimulation. “This area is packed with nerve-endings, so it feels really sensitive,” says Arlene Goldman, Ph.D., coauthor of Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy .
Some guys say that by applying pressure to this area, they’re able to have multiple orgasms —which is probably because you can stimulate your prostate gland externally via your perineum. During intercourse or oral sex , ask your partner to place a finger here and press onto it until the pressure feels just right.
Speaking of the prostate, it turns out this gland is the male equivalent to the G-spot. You can stimulate it externally by applying pressure to your perineum, but if you’re interested in maximizing pleasure, you’ll have to do a little anal probing.
If you're playing with a partner, have them lube up the soft pad of a finger and stick it about 2 inches inside your butt. Once they feel the small, walnut-sized lump, they can apply some pressure and light thrusting. If you want to explore anal play solo, a prostate massager or vibrating butt plug can help you out.
One option for a mind-blowing orgasmic experience is to combine prostate and penile stimulation. Another option is to focus entirely on the prostate and have a P-spot orgasm, which many people describe as a deeper, fuller-body sensation .
“The penis is like the high scorer that keeps the morale up, and then you bring in the prostate and you’re like, ‘Holy shit! I didn’t know the prostate could assist!’” Play says. “Then you realize the prostate can do it by itself.”
Mentally, you may want to go for another round after achieving a great orgasm, but most guys physically can't get another erection immediately following sex. “A refractory period is the time after a man ejaculates when he is no longer able to have an erection,” Emily Morse , sexologist and host of the Sex With Emily podcast, previously told Men's Health .
This period is different for every guy and can last anywhere from minutes to a full day. However, there are ways to shorten this phase, she explains. The best way to decrease refractory time is by increasing arousal. “This could be doing something different, like trying out a toy or talking dirty (or dirtier than usual). Even small changes can be just the novelty and excitement needed to rev up the engines for round two."
Thanks to that pesky refractory period, it's tough to have more than one ejaculatory orgasm in a row. But with enough practice, you might be able to have non-ejaculatory multiple orgasms, also known as NEMOs.
The key is squeezing your pubococcygeal muscle (it should feel like stopping a pee midstream) right at the brink of climax, until you learn to separate the feeling of orgasm from the experience of ejaculation. Deep breathing can also help you lean into those feel-good sensations without blowing your load.
"You can’t expect for each small orgasm to feel like your usual orgasms," Jonathan Stegall, M.D., founder and president of the Center for Advanced Medicine in Atlanta, previously told Men's Health . "They’ll be less in intensity, but for some men, having several small orgasms is actually preferable to having one big one."
If you ask Play, the easiest way to cum multiple times is to throw some prostate orgasms into the mix, since the recovery time is shorter.
“You know how women do kegel exercises and say it strengthens their vaginal orgasm? Men can do the same,” says Alex Robboy, a sex therapist in Philadelphia.
Essentially, kegel exercises are a way of contracting the muscles of the pelvic floor, which give you greater control and intensity during sex. Try lifting your penis up and down with your muscles, or even try to “write the alphabet with the tip of your penis,” suggests Robboy.
We're used to sex toys being marketed toward women and people with a vulva, but there are plenty of toys out there to help penis-owners get off, too. You've probably heard of the Fleshlight, a popular male masturbator, but did you know there are also vibrators designed specifically for the penis? Cock rings , butt plugs , and prostate massagers can also bring new sensations into your sexual experience.
Getting in shape will help every facet of your sex life, and part of getting in shape is eating better .Start with greens. Spinach helps dilate blood vessels, which can increase blood flow to the genitals. Other greens like kale, cabbage, and bok choy are good sources of folate, which helps reproductive health.
Next, make sure you're eating eggs . They're rich in B vitamins, which ease stress and are important for a healthy libido, which means better orgasms. Finally, get down with some oatmeal . Oats and whole grains are one of the few natural ways to boost testosterone in your bloodstream. More testosterone equals stronger orgasms.
Delayed gratification can be hard to master, but when it comes to your orgasm, it’s well worth it. A study in the Journal of Sex Research advocated “ edging ,” or the practice of purposefully delaying orgasm for a more intense climax. The study showed that if people paused when they were about 90 percent of the way to climax, and then resumed after slowing down a bit, their eventual orgasm was way more powerful.
It’s an easy way to amp up your game: Bring yourself to the “edge” of your orgasm, slow down, pause, and then start back up again. Try to do this two or three times before letting yourself go.
The hormone that helps you orgasm is the same one that your body produces when you root for your favorite sports team, lift weights at the gym, or watch Game of Thrones .
Research from Athens’ Military Hospital in Greece found that when you have more T in your bloodstream, you’re more likely to orgasm—and do it big . Before your next romp, try some testosterone-boosting activities like going for a run.
Just before you ejaculate, your testicles rise up near your body to give more power to your ejaculation. “If you press gently upward on the testicles just before ejaculation, it’s likely to be very arousing,” says Goldman.
Ask your partner to place the palm of their hand upward on your balls, moving them a little closer to your body. It’ll heighten your arousal and increase the intensity of your orgasm.
Sometimes during sex, you’ll get lost in your head—thinking about how hot your partner is, pondering the best porn you’ve ever watched, or even thinking about what’s for dinner. For a better orgasm, return to your body.
Think about it like this: If you’re running, you’ll get a completely different workout if you’re letting your mind wander than if you’re completely concentrating on your form. “Focus on the physical sensation,” says Robboy, and you’ll feel your body responding differently.
“This comes from tantric sex, where you’re supposed to move the stroke with your breath,” says Goldman.
Zero in on your breath, and try to slow it down until it’s in tune with your thrusts. When you’re just about to come, you’ll notice your heart rate and breathing naturally start to speed up—but keeping it slower will improve the amount of oxygen and blood flow that reaches your genitals, making your climax even stronger.
First, you should maintain a low blood pressure for the sake of your overall health. However, keeping your blood pressure low can also help with your sex life. That's because damage from high blood pressure limits blood flow throughout your body–including the penis. This can make it difficult to maintain erections. Plus, high blood pressure is linked to problems with ejaculation and reduced sexual desire, according to the Mayo Clinic .
An image from the first footage of the elusive male orgasm ever to be captured by science.
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Scientists closely examine the rare male-orgasm footage.
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CAMBRIDGE, MA—Announcing "a major advance in the age-old quest to unlock the secrets at the heart of human sexuality," researchers at Harvard's Center For The Graphic Depiction Of The Human Sexual Act confirmed Monday that, with the aid of experimental new high-speed photographic technology, they have successfully captured the elusive male orgasm on film.
The breakthrough marks the first time the male orgasm—perhaps the most mysterious, least-understood element of the complex dance that is human sexual behavior—has been successfully photographed.
"We have taken a giant leap forward in the struggle to unravel the mysteries of human love, illuminating aspects of the male orgasm that have long been hidden in a haze of speculation," said Dr. Donald Roehnert, head of the multidisciplinary team of experts credited with the breakthrough. "Though it is still too early to say how much can be learned, even a cursory examination of this historic footage reveals much that we otherwise never would have known about the magic and mystery of male sexuality."
For centuries, the male orgasm has remained shrouded in myth. Though it has long captivated imaginations with its evocative beauty, humanity's understanding of this most profound of human experiences has been clouded by ignorance and superstition since its discovery by the ancient Greeks in pre-Hellenistic times.
According to experts, there are many reasons that the male orgasm has remained such an enigma. Perhaps the greatest, however, is the deep unwillingness of males to allow themselves the extraordinary emotional vulnerability the act elicits.
A Healthier Life Talk it out with remote therapy programs and tools.
"The male animal is not a piece of meat," Roehnert explained. "He is a rose wrapped in a poem, yielding up his deepest, most intimate secrets only when just the right magical moment has been achieved. The alluring yet fragile petals of the delicate flower known as the male of the species can unfold and bloom only in the presence of the right combination of gentleness, tenderness and deep, abiding care."
By establishing a powerful empathic bond with their male test subject and then reinforcing that bond with respect and trust over a period of many months, the Harvard scientists were able to do what no scientific effort could before: capture the moment of sweet release in all its majestic splendor.
Despite their success, the Harvard team did encounter its share of challenges and setbacks along the way.
"Only the most advanced camera equipment, under extremely precise lighting conditions and with the best in high-speed film stock, was sensitive enough to capture the image clearly," said Dr. John Leslie, the Harvard team's optics and photography expert. "But the effort was well worth it: Now that the exquisite, breathtaking majesty of the male orgasm has been immortalized on camera, the world will finally know just what an incredible sight it truly is."
"On a personal note," the visibly affected Leslie added, "the first time I saw the footage, I wept. And I'm not ashamed to say so."
According to Leslie, countless scenarios were tried, covering a wide range of sensory stimuli, before the precise conditions needed to trigger the fragile bodily response could be found.
"Using a painstaking process of trial and error, hundreds of situations were attempted," he said. "We tried everything: pool-cleaners arriving to find bikini-clad nubiles in the backyard, unsuspecting pizza-delivery drivers finding themselves at sorority pajama parties—you name it. Virtually every permutation of sensory stimuli you could imagine was exhaustively explored."
But in the end, Leslie said, only one scenario proved both orgasm-inducing and feasible to record: the direct ejaculation of the male member onto a corresponding female partner's face, with the woman's head positioned only inches away.
"For some reason," Leslie said, "no other set of circumstances produced the desired effect. Oh, and the woman has to have high-heeled shoes on, too, although she's otherwise undressed. We don't know why that is, either."
The scientists acknowledged that such riddles may never be fully unraveled.
"The male orgasm, like the song of the nightingale or the simple beauty of a rainbow, remains an exquisite and beautiful mystery, one whose timeless wonderment cannot be fully explained by something so cold and clinical as scientific analysis," Roehnert said. "There are many factors at work here that science will likely never understand."
"Perhaps it is a question best left to the poets and philosophers," he added.
Now that the male orgasm has been successfully captured on film, the scientists can begin in earnest the next phase of their research: subjecting the test footage to countless hours of scrutiny.
"Only by watching this wondrous imagery hundreds upon hundreds of times can we begin to understand what it has to teach us," Roehnert said. "The work is long, and the life is hard, but I know of no other cause so deeply rewarding."
Though the Harvard team's success has been hailed throughout the scientific world, individuals in other spheres have also shown interest in the photographic breakthrough.
"It may seem far-fetched at this point," Vivid Video spokesman Brian Gross said, "but someday, this advance could have commercial applications, as well."
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How to Do It is Slate’s sex advice column. Have a question? Send it to Stoya and Rich here. It’s anonymous!
The first time I (34, female) saw my boyfriend (40, male) have an orgasm, I thought he was having a seizure: For a solid 10 minutes (not exaggerating), he alternately writhed around like he was being electrocuted, barked like a walrus, got stiff as a board, started to drool, etc., etc. It scared the hell out of me until he finally came out of it and said, “Oh, yeah, I have intense orgasms sometimes. I should have warned you. Sorry … ”
The thing is, he has orgasms like this every time. It is simultaneously the most beautiful and hysterical thing I’ve ever witnessed. That said, I know this isn’t normal, and it can be quite limiting in some ways: It means that his orgasm almost always marks the end of sex because, frankly, by the time he’s done, I’m not really in the mood for anything else. It also means there’s no such thing as a quickie for us, and some other games—covert sex in public places, for example—mean he doesn’t get to come.
It’s not that he isn’t a generous lover: He makes sure I orgasm hard and often, he’s happy going down on me or using his fingers, and he has plenty of stamina. But sometimes I’d like to end with a cuddle together (before I’m no longer turned on) or something other than holding him while he writhes around and I try and hold back a giggle. When we visited his parents early this spring, we agreed to try and see if he could “rein it in” a little bit, and while he avoided the usual walrus bark noises
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