Men Going Down On Women

Men Going Down On Women

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16 Thoughts Every Girl Has When A Guy Goes Down On Her

By Hetty Tullis
Published Mar 25, 2016

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Work, hygiene, and the shopping list. What do you think about when your man is going down on you? Are you totally focused on the moment or do you start to worry about flabby thighs and whether you let
Work, hygiene, and the shopping list. What do you think about when your man is going down on you? Are you totally focused on the moment or do you start to worry about flabby thighs and whether you let the dog out to pee after you got home? Is trash pickup tomorrow or the next day?
Buddhists call it monkey brains and we call it scattered brains, but it doesn't matter what it is called because we ladies have one heck of a time trying to shut our brains down and enjoy the moment. It doesn't matter if our love is making all the right moves downstairs, if we are still upset about our sister dating that jack-butt from the club, there is no way we are going to be able to relax into the moment.
And while some of us worry during the moment, others take a mental dive into heavy sarcasm and mentally rip apart our partner's tongue abilities. Does he need a textbook to figure this out? We daydream. What if that was Benedict Cumberbatch down there? We also ponder strange notions, such as what if there was a school that taught men how to perform oral sex (and all sex) the right way? What would the curriculum look like and how would the degrees be titled?
Really, guys should never learn what goes on inside our minds when we are getting some downtown loving, but for us women we can all relate.
The day has been a total wreck, from spilling coffee on your white blouse at work to nearly getting into a car accident because some jerk pulled out in front of you. The last thing you want right now is oral sex because you are so stressed out. On the other hand, you secretly know that if he gets you going all that stress is going to melt away. You lay back, close your eyes, and let the magic happen.
You lay back, close your eyes, and what is this? Does he know what he is doing and why is he doing that? That certainly is not the right spot. Maybe he can’t find it? You start to picture yourself drawing a diagram for him showing all the important lady parts he seems to be missing. You take a deep breath. Okay, this is not working out. Let’s just skip ahead to the in and out part.
It is that frantic moment when he wants to go down on you and you hesitate for a moment, trying to remember if you showered this morning. “God, I hope I’m clean down there,” you think to yourself. In the meantime, he is starting to think you aren’t in the mood. Nuts on it. Like he is going to notice and if he does, he will be good enough not to say anything because that is just how wonderful he is.
We know how we like it. We might like getting oral with our legs together, spread apart, while we are on our backs, or while sitting on the sofa. Sometimes, however, our guy (or gal) might try and force us into an uncomfortable position. It is awkward and there is simply no way in Hades we will ever reach an orgasm like this. Ugh.
Yeah, so we can come up with some pretty weird thoughts while someone is going down on us. One of those is pondering what exactly oral sex feels like when a dental dam is in use. Where do you even get one of those things, anyway? At the dentist? Images of stopping by the family dentist and asking for a dental dam floods your mind and before your know it, your boyfriend is saying, “Hey! Hey? Are you getting anything out of this or should I just stop?”
He is a brand spanking new boyfriend and now that he is positioned between your legs, you find out that he can really work some magic down there. Between your ohs and yeses, you start to wonder how on earth he got so darn good at this. Maybe he took online courses on how to perform oral sex? Do those classes even exist? (They do.) Or maybe he’s been in a few naughty flicks? Oh, who the heck cares. This is feeling absolutely perfect.
You know the type. As soon as you spread your legs, he is in there. I am not talking about the licking stuff, but his whole face is really in there. Is he trying to crawl up in there? God, he must have some severe mommy issues.
Head back and knees up. You are waiting patiently for him to hit the sweet spot. He’s almost there, almost there, and oh! He passed it. Go back over, a little to the right. Yeah, that's the spot. You knock his head back and forth between your thighs, getting him to stay in that one special place. Too bad no one’s designed a leash for the tongue. Maybe I could train him with a zap collar?
Why do I always wonder what he did with his ex? He is here, right now, with me, and yet I still ponder about his sexual past. Man, he is so good at this. Did she think that, too? Ugh, I can’t get her out of my head. Concentrate. Stop thinking about his ex.
Let's see. I took a shower this morning, went to work, did some running around afterwards, and now he wants to go down on me. Should I run to the bathroom and give myself a quick swipe with a wash cloth or should I just trust that I am not stinky down there? Women are always worrying about their smell, but to be honest, sometimes guys can be pretty rank down there too. This is especially true after a workout or a hot day mowing the lawn. If you are worried about it, make the excuse that you want to brush your teeth first and make a quick dart into the bathroom for a sniff test. He might think you’re a bit weird, but it is better that risking it.
He is totally into it, but you aren’t. You are just not in the mood for oral right now, but like a great boyfriend he is still down there, trying to give you that magic moment. You endure it for as long as you can, running through the grocery list in your head. You reach over, grab your phone, and start cruising through your Facebook feed. He doesn’t notice. It is a total lost cause and knowing that nothing is going to happen, you pull him up for some regular action.
You finally get some one on one time with your love, he is giving you some downtown loving, and your boss pops into your head. Bloody nuts on a pogo stick! You can’t stand your manager and the way he talks down to you. In a matter of seconds, you go from horny to supremely pissed. Then you remember that your love is still down there, between your legs. Focus, you tell yourself as you force yourself to relax
Oh my goddess. I should not have eaten all those carbs at dinner. He is so going to notice my gut. I try sucking it in, but that is too uncomfortable to hold while he is doing the tongue thing. I try stretching out and arching my back, but now he's lost the sweet spot. Darn it. If he can't handle the belly pudge then he just isn't my kind of guy.
Woah, wait a minute. You mean you are done already? I haven't even gotten started yet. Heck, that wasn't even a warm up. Get back down there, boy.
I have a creepy cat named Jack. He watches me in the shower, when I go to the bathroom, and he likes to hang out on the bed where all the action is. We've tried pushing him off the bed, but then he gets onto the dresser and just sits there, watching us. I can only imagine what he is thinking. Cats are creepy.
It is that magic moment. The oh yes. Don't. Stop. Go. Yes! Yes! Oh f*ck yes! Ahhhh... It is the perfect end to a not so perfect day. You smile, stretch, and try to roll over for a nap. But, what's that? Your needs? Ah, god. Okay. Just bring it up here and let's get this over with.
Sources: cosmopolitan.com , bustle.com

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We’ve all seen the stats about how faking orgasms is more common than you would think. And if you’re here, then you’re obviously trying to score some real points in the bedroom.
Sure, pleasing a woman isn’t exactly rocket science, but it does take some rock solid technique. Don’t think you can just go down there and do whatever you want. That’s a waste of energy. Going down on a woman requires a lot of communication and some experimenting.
But before you start performing oral on your girl, it doesn’t hurt to do a little research. Thankfully, plenty of Reddit users are willing to share some tips.
Here are 13 of the best ones we found.
“ Build up is key . Take a looooong time to explore other parts of her body first. When you finally get to the vagina, focus on other parts before zooming in on her clit. Start slow.”
“ Be gentle ! Whether you are going fast or slow, be tender with her lady parts!”
“When it sounds like she is really enjoying it, keep doing what you are doing , don’t speed up or slow down or try something new. She is enjoying what you are currently doing so why change it up?”
“Listen! Be keen on how your girl responds to what you are doing and make note of the techniques that make her twist with ecstasy vs yawn.”
“Tease her. The last place you should go is the clit , and she should be begging for it. Be attentive and enthusiastic. Tell her how good she tastes.
“On clit sucking specifically: Some women like this, others do not. Some like the clit sucked on directly, others it’s best to suck around the entire vagina . Also, if your whole mouth is around the top of her vagina, there will be a natural vacuum when you’re performing tongue tricks anyway.”
“Personally, I find that using fingers can be 1) distracting for her, or 2) gets in the way of my mouth’s rhythm (think patting head while rubbing belly). I actually think the Nina Hartley video does a great job of explaining some fingering options (come hither motion, pinching labia/clit, opposite come hither hold). However, again, because of #1 and #2 above, I typically use only my mouth when it’s time to get her all the way there.”
“ Try and find the g-spot with a finger and apply on-and-off pressure to it while you’re working the clit/labia. The g-spot isn’t hard to find, here’s how: if she’s lying on her back, it’s gonna be on the roof of the vagina. Put a finger in and press up, you’ll feel the pelvic bone through the tissue. The tissue where the g-spot is will feel really spongy and kind of rough. If you can work that spot in tandem with the clit/labia, hopefully you’ll get some good results.”
“ Make her feel totally confident in herself , totally comfortable and not self conscious. I can tell you that worrying if my SO is enjoying it or if he likes how I taste will absolutely ruin it. She won’t pay any attention to what you’re doing because she’s so worried.”
“When you can, breathe out of your mouth . Depends on the girl, but the feeling of heat from your breath can be very stimulating.”
“You take everything you’ve seen in porn and you forget it.”
“The best thing to do is ask , in my experience. Harder? Slower? Faster? You like that?”
“Asking beforehand is good but the best time I find is after (seeing as during is very distracting unless its openly expressed that your both doing it out of experimentational purposes).
“ Ask her how certain things felt . More than likely the most memorable parts will be the ending or the surprisingly good parts. [Then] focus on finding what those were and figure out how to fine tune them to her liking.”

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this particular sexual impulse still manages to escape a significant number of men

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Posted on October 9, 2014
- By
Julia Austin

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