Melania Trump Huge Ass

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Melania Trump Is an Asshole — I Told You So!
My publisher was firm, “You can not use a picture of Melania Trump on your cover.”
But it wasn’t photos of Melania I had sent them, they were snaps of me dressed as Melania.
If you saw me walking down the street, except that I’m tall and lanky, you would never place Melania and I in the same lineup. I have short hair and walk, talk, and joke like a dyke, injecting my Queens accent into my learned General American whenever passionate.
How then do I get so often confused for Melania when I do her impression? Sure, when I’m impersonating her I wear a white “bandaid” dress and a wig cut to match her tresses, with eyebrows drawn in that could start their own Twitter feed, but what really sells my impression is what’s lurking behind my eyes.
To get the essence, I broke down what makes Melania, Melania, injecting just the right mix of personality traits (layer a survivor’s cunning with selfishness and a dash of arrogance) so that when you see a photo or video of me as Melania, there will be a moment when you have room for pause, “Who is that?”
What you sense, either consciously or unconsciously, is the knowing that comes with “actor hunches,” which is a term that I just made up to describe what actors come to know about a person by inhabiting them. My diligent work in creating an impression means that I uncover a lot of these bits of information.
For example, I studied how Melania doesn’t walk, she floats. This is because she is never “in” her feet. This means she doesn’t hold her weight / presence / energy anywhere near the ground.
Observe people walking down the street. You will notice that people move most of their weight towards one part of their body and away from another part. Melania keeps her energy as far away from the ground as she can. As a result she has a lot of tension in her upper back and shoulders.
Melania is smart and has an iron will, so if she were my friend I wouldn’t worry about her. If you asked her if she was fearful, she’d laugh at you. “I gots all a girl would want, no?” But deep down she is not as secure as she may try to portray.
Many years ago, Melania constructed psychological armor in order to hide her fear from herself and the world. But her feet betray her. Under all the money that’s not technically hers and the power that comes only with conditions she’s afraid.
Melania deals with her anxiety with incredible cunning and bravado. In fact, my interpretation only feels authentic if I mix in a dash of superiority; a dash of arrogance ensures that my impression has that special Melania Trump brand of grace. In fact, Melania and Donald are united in feeling superior to the masses, bonded by their mutual ambition, drive, and arrogance, with a willingness to lie for personal gain and to ignore truths in the face of adverse proof.
So I didn’t need tapes to tell me that Melania is an asshole. For the past two years I’ve been ringing the proverbial bell with video sketches and stand up comedy designed to show you, through laughter, that she’s on Donald’s team. For instance, she promotes hurricane preparedness by selling BeBest-branded paper towels or sells commemorative plates of all the dictators Donald admires. For those who see Melania as a victim please see my web mini-series Fantasy Melania where I amplify your thoughts to absurdity (hiding collusion evidence in their wedding album, for example) to show you that you’re swimming in the Trumpian haze created by Melania-approved gaslighting. She is one of Donald’s paratroopers by choice and she remains so also by choice.
This is incredibly important for the upcoming election: they use Melania to soften Donald’s image, attempting to make us believe that he can’t be that bad because look at the nice woman he’s married to.
As I outline in my humor book Inside Melania: What I Know About Melania Trump by Impersonating Her, she’s Donald’s willing trooper who will do whatever he asks, including throwing her former friend, under the proverbial bus because, “this is the way it has to be.”
Now that we have tapes (thank you, Stephanie Winston Wolkoff) I hate to say it, but I’ll say it because I’ve spent three years bashing my head against my computer in frustration about the public naivety over Melania Trump gaslighting: I told you so.
Want to know more on the inside of Melania Trump? Join my email list and get two free chapters of the audiobook version of Inside Melania: What I Know About Melania Trump by Impersonating Her.
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The former First Lady and the former US President Donald Trump pushed up costs with international trips and stays at Mar-a-Lago in Florida, according to a new book
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Donald and Melania Trump reportedly racked up security costs of $600 million [£423m] and created an unprecedented "protection price tag".
The former First Lady decided to stay in Manhattan, New York, for the first five months of her husband’s presidency.
This pushed up costs for security agents, along with Trump’s trips to Mar-a-Lago and his sons' international business ventures, The Mercury News reports.
Washington Post reporter Carol Leonnig said the couple’s penthouse in New York created a security challenge "unlike any the Secret Service had ever faced before".
She wrote in the new book Zero Fail: "Assessing and shielding the Trump family’s three-story penthouse apartment from attacks created a protection price tag unlike any other the Service had encountered."
In March 2017, the Secret Service reportedly asked for an additional $28.3 million [£19.9m] to secure the property.
Melania wanted to use the five-month delay to renegotiate her prenuptial agreement with Trump, according to 2020 biography The Art of Her Deal by Washington Post reporter Mary Jordan.
In total, agents had to offer protection for 18 of Trump’s family members, Leonnig claims.
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After leaving the White House, he extended secret service protection to 13 family members for six months.
At one point, Vanessa Trump – Donald Trump Jr’s wife – began dating one of the agents assigned to her family, according to Leonnig.
She filed for divorce in March 2019 but the agent did not face disciplinary action, The Guardian reports.
He was not Vanessa’s official guardian during the alleged affair, it is claimed.
Leonnig also alleges that Tiffany Trump broke up with her boyfriend and "began spending an unusual amount of time alone with a Secret Service agent on her detail".
Agents "became concerned at how close Tiffany appeared to be getting".
Trump also tried to remove agents he thought were too overweight or short.
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The former President reportedly said: "I want these fat guys off my detail.
"How are they going to protect me and my family if they can’t run down the street?"
The former First Lady is said to have the entire marriage set-up "down to a science".
These claims were made after her husband was seen boarding a flight from Florida without her.
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Trump will reportedly spend the summer at his golf club in Bedminster, New Jersey.
But his wife and son Barron, 15, were not seen getting on the plane.
However, they had been spotted having lunch with him earlier on Mother’s Day in the US.
Mar-a-Lago is mostly shutting down for summer, US media reports.
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Melania Trump Huge Ass