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A place for mature women redditors r/ AskWomenOver30
THE ASKWOMENOVER30 SUBREDDIT STANDS IN SUPPORT OF ROE V. WADE AND IN SUPPORT OF REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS.
Roe v. Wade - Discussion Megathread
Why am I so upset about the idea of “age gracefully”
The guy I’m dating told me he is planning on having another baby with his ex-wife using frozen embroys. Perspectives?
How can I be less emotional at work?
We welcome the Reddit community to elicit opinions on a variety of matters from our community of women ages 30 and up. Discussions must remain civil at all times, and women must be allowed to dominate the discussion.
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Lately I’ve realized I have been feeling adverse to my boyfriend touching me sexually. Like touching my ass, boobs, inner thigh, stuff like that. This is in the context of sitting on the couch watching TV, standing in the kitchen cooking, laying in bed waking up in the morning, etc. I couldn’t really figure it out these past couple weeks but I think I have now…it makes me feel sexualized and objectified.
I guess I feel like this is unreasonable because he’s attracted to me and he’s showing his attraction…and that’s just how being in a relationship with a man goes. But then I’m also like is it really that big of an ask for me to explain how that makes me feel? And how I’d rather that he touches other parts of my body or at the very least ask for consent? I’m realizing I’m just not that big on touch when I’m in a secure relationship vs an anxious attachment.
Has anyone else ever felt this way?
EDIT: Thank you everyone for your input, you’ve given me lots to think about as I continue to process my feelings.
The last 4 days when I was in the office I did not wear make up and I owned it.
Other than looking a little tired on Zoom calls no one noticed.
My skin feels so much lighter and I love not having to adjust eyelashes, finding I missed some that day and that they are flaking.
Just wanted to share my positive experience and encourage others!
And telling women to avoid plastic surgeries.
An ex that I remained friends with occasionally texts me and makes conversation. Honestly, I answer very short and mostly because I feel a bit sorry for him that he doesn’t talk to people and feels lonely. Maybe that’s my mistake. Anyway he asked me what Am I doing to “defy aging”. I appreciate the complement because I choose to spend money and effort on looking attractive, because that’s important to me. And I try to answer in a modest way saying it’s not easy and I put effort on it. I said I do Botox and facials often.
His answer was: “First you don't need Botox ... Please don't have plastic surgery / face lift later like the celebs do ... It never turns out well.
Grow old gracefully ... You still look way younger than you age!!”
I can’t help to be so bother by that comment. Not that is by an him but just in general I think that’s the sentiment of society in general. Age gracefully but of course look always attractive.
I feel like I will be judged on any choice I make and while I truly don’t care for anyones opinion on whether or not I should get facelift and Botox I am so bother by people daring to tell me what not do with my body and money.
How do you feel about people suggesting you age gracefully instead of doing cosmetic treatments?
I (39F) have been seeing a man (38M) who has just finalized his divorce 6 months ago. He has a 3yo daughter. On the 2nd date, I was asking him questions about the kind of family he might be envisioning for his future, and he confessed to me he and his ex-wife have frozen embryos from their IVF cycles (using his sperm and her egg) and they plan on using them to have 1 more child. He said it was his idea, and he and his ex really want their daughter to have a sibling. He said he is infertile and his ex is 44yo, and obv they spent a lot of money making those embryos, so it seemed to make sense. He says the relationship with his ex is cordial.
I’ve never been married, no kids. I do have a desire to be in a serious relationship (or married) and raise kids but at this point in my life, not making it a goal to have bio kids, so I’ve been slowly opening my mind up to becoming a stepmom. So this is new territory for me. This news threw me off balance at first. I’m glad he told me early on so that if I decide this arrangement is not for me, I can walk away and not have wasted either of our time.
I decided that the sole fact that a man and his ex wife are planning to do this is not reason enough for me to walk away, if I like him enough. Whether he has good character, maturity, and emotional health are more important factors. But I’m posting here because I’m wondering about other perspectives regarding this situation that I may be missing in my consideration.
I think I am pretty level headed at work. But there are days when I feel really stressed or hear a sad news or get angry (like how my co worker had resigned), I cry. I dont sob out loud, usually I go to the bathroom to cry it out.. but when im back at my desk, i just continue crying quietly.
I have read books on being emotionally intelligent, stoicsm, spoken to a counsellor.. but nothing seems to work.
Any tips from you girls on how I can strengthen my emotional intelligence? Thanks
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