Little Teens Pussy Sex

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Little Teens Pussy Sex
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When do you know when your kid is old enough to have sex and wants to have someone sleep over at your house?
This question is perplexing many of my friends at the moment, the ones with teens around 15, 16, 17.
As with most parenting dilemmas, I had to figure this one out on my own a few years earlier than my friends because their kids are mostly younger than my eldest. I’m not sure if I got it right or wrong. But I’m happy with my decision and I’m happy to share how I came to making it.
My son had his first serious girlfriend at age 16 and she was a year older than him. It was a lovely relationship and lasted almost a year. The first time he asked if she could stay over, they had already been together a few months. I said sure and then I made her sleep on the couch in another room.
I have no idea what happened after I went to bed but I can guess because I’ve been 16.
Luca rolled his eyes at the fact he even had to go through the motions of separate rooms. He thought it was ridiculous. But I was adamant.
You can follow Luca on Facebook, here . 
I thought a lot about it. And eventually I realised I was being silly. I was also being a hypocrite.
Before I did a backflip and allowed her to sleep in his room, I reflected on my beliefs:
I also reminded myself that my son and his girlfriend were both over the legal age of consent. The law says they are old enough to have sex.
Sure, my parents didn't allow sleepovers before I was 18 but that didn't stop me having sex or even slow me down ( you can read about that here ). And just because I had certain rules growing up, being a parent is about making your own.
So that's how I came to allow my son's girlfriend to stay overnight in his room. With the door closed.
Here are some of the things you might be wondering at this point:
Yes, I had younger children in the house. Still do. At that time they were five and eight. But whenever they had sleep overs, their friends slept in the same room so it's not like they were aware of any big difference for their brother. And a 'bad' example? Again, see my beliefs above. Even if they did realise their brother was having sex (they didn't), there are lots of things older people do that young kids know they can't. Like drinking alcohol. Driving a car. Going out at night. Paying taxes.
Mia talks about her reasoning on the latest episode of Mamamia Out Loud:
Excellent question. Yes, my eldest child was a boy. Perhaps I would have felt differently if he were a girl but I don't think so and I don't plan to have different rules for our daughter. Let's see how my husband and I feel about that when the time comes......although based on the risks for girls having sex in parks and at parties and being filmed, it could be argued that it's even more important for them to be able to have their partners stay over.
This worried me for a bit. Was I responsible for upholding rules or boundaries for other people? In the case of my son's girlfriend, she was a full year old than him and I'd met her mother and spoken to her on the phone before when she'd joined us for a few days on holidays. If she'd raised sleeping arrangements with me I would have asked what she was comfortable with and then willingly complied.
But she didn't so I decided it wasn't my business to police what someone else's child was or wasn't allowed to do. My house, my rules. And my rule is that sleepovers in the same room was OK - for my son in this situation. Every parent has to make their own decision based on their own circumstances and their own kid.
In case you think our house is some kind of teenage sex den, let me alleviate you of that delusion.
My son has never had a girl I didn't know stay over. Or if he has (he probably has), they've been gone by the morning and I've been none the wiser. I assume he put them in an Uber to make sure they got home safely and treated them with the utmost respect because that's how he's been raised ( he wrote more about that here ) and that's the kind of man he is.
Now he is 19 and has another girlfriend and she stays over regularly and we all adore her and how can any of that be a bad thing?
What they do behind closed doors is none of my business.
As a parent, it can be hugely confronting to think about your kids having sex. I KNOW.
If they're little right now, the whole concept can feel surreal.
It's on par with thinking about your parents having sex.
I'm sorry for that mental picture. Please replace it with this image of me wearing a ridiculous outfit:
In my book, Work, Strife, Balance I have written more about sex and teenage girls, in particular. It's a hugely fraught area for parents. All my friends with teenage daughters are traversing terrain that feels far more complex and nuanced (and frightening) than my relatively straightforward decisions about my son.
So much of parenting, in my 20 years of doing it with mixed results, is about sorting what you feel you SHOULD do from what you believe, what you want to do and what your child wants.
I'm completely comfortable with my rules around sex under my roof even though I realise that the ability to have sex freely at home has always been one of the main motivating factors for kids moving out of home. Banning sex sleep-overs is a guaranteed way to empty your nest sooner rather than later.
So my kids will probably all be here until they're 30. I'm cool with that.
They have to buy their own condoms though. You have to draw the line somewhere.
Listen to the full episode of Mamamia Out Loud here:

Do you agree with Mia? At what age is it ok for your kids to have 'sleepovers'?
Sorry, completely irrelevant to this discussion, but I just wanted to praise you for the article about the non-heroism of cadel evans and sports stars in general - couldn't agree more, and very sorry to hear about the backlash. We definitely need more people that think about sport the way you do!
Why does the majority think sex is the be all and end all of human existence anyway? Ever heard of teaching something called self-control? We are not animals. I mean we are but we like to think we aren't. Self-control is an unfashionable skill in these hedonistic times, but it is actually very useful and important. How are you going to have a long, proper relationship and stick with that one person for life if you are always chopping and changing girlfriends and boyfriends every few months when you get bored with that person? When my parents got married they hadn't had sex with anybody and theirs was a lifelong, stable marriage. They were well into their twenties therefore, before having sex. Most teenagers don't have the emotional maturity to start having sex anyway. Sex is not a recreation or a sport believe it or not.
Oh come on, did you read what wrote? With most (not all) teenagers all they think about IS sex. Either they are doing it, wanting to do it or thinking there was something wrong with them if nobody wants to do it with them. As parents it's our job from an early age to be open and honest and be prepared to reply to the hard questions as well as provide them with the tools should they want to act on their feelings. Teach them to respect their bodies and not be afraid to experiment if they so choose. I believe you're fooling yourself if you think your parents weren't thinking about sex even if they never acted on it. Social norms of the day restricted couples acting on feelings out of fear of repercussions given that "marriage" was seen as the ultimate in coupledom. You're right in that teenagers don't have "emotional maturity", just lots and lots of hormones, so instead of condemning their thoughts and actions, give them the emotional stability to get them through this extremely tumultuous period of their lives.
there isn't a hard question about sex, the hard question is why the children [young people] are not guided at first to get an education.

This article is more than 7 years old
This article is more than 7 years old
It’s long past time to shine a light on what too many children endure. Photograph: Jens Meyer/AP
Thu 29 Jan 2015 13.20 GMT Last modified on Tue 8 Aug 2017 20.04 BST
Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning
© 2022 Guardian News & Media Limited or its affiliated companies. All rights reserved. (modern)
I never felt like a victim, but long after I grew up, every sexual experience brought me back to that winter night I didn’t understand
T here’s a reason why, when a woman whispers her story of sexual abuse, when she writes about it , when she Tweets about it or carries a mattress around on her back, calls the police or a rape crisis line, I believe her.
The reason is because it happened to me. And you didn’t know, because I didn’t tell you. I didn’t tell anyone.
Uncle “Doug” was an old friend of my parents; he visited our family often and occasionally joined us for holidays. One evening, when I was six, he offered to babysit me and my older sister at his house.
Before bedtime, Uncle Doug told us both a bedtime story about a werewolf who howled at the moon in the bitter cold of winter on top of a snowy hill, just like the hill outside the window over the sink in Uncle Doug’s kitchen. He could do these pitch-perfect character voices, and in that way, he was charismatic and appealing to children. The werewolf would howl, he said, his thirst for the blood of children relentless, until one night he came charging through a window of a house trying to catch the little girl inside. The broken glass pierced his throat, and then he was dead, his head hanging over the sill, blood dripping down the wall to the floor.
And then my sister went to bed, and I sat in his small, dimly lit kitchen, on his lap, as he nuzzled my hair and then my ear and neck, and squeezed me hard and soft at the same time. I remember staring fixedly at the window in his kitchen, into the dark snowy night, through a pane of cold glass, the moon casting shadows, a dark tree, listening for the howl of the werewolf, trying not to pay attention to what was actually happening.
What was actually happening is that he was kissing me, whispering in my ear things I didn’t understand, and rubbing the tops of my 6-year-old thighs, right where my underwear started, while I sat on his lap.
Afterwards, he took to calling me his “wifey” and signed notes to me: “Love, your hubby”. There was never another physical encounter like the one at his house, but when he visited ours, he would request “private” viewings of me practicing my ballet and leer at me longingly in my leotard and tights; he looked for any opportunity to touch me – my hand, my shoulder, the small of my back. After a couple of years, when I started to understand how inappropriate his behavior was, I refused to have anything to do with him.
I never told my parents anything. My only act of acknowledgement that he did something bad was when I crossed out with a ballpoint pen the “Love, your hubby” at the bottom of a poem he had written in my autograph book when I was eight or nine. The poem: “Tulips in the garden, tulips in the park/But the best place for tulips, is tulips in the dark”.
Uncle Doug did not hurt me physically, but he laid the groundwork for who and what I would become with men throughout my adolescence and into my early adulthood – a wreckage of fondled girlhood looking out a dark window whenever a man was on top of me. His adult hand edging up my six-year-old thigh made it seem natural to me when much older men showed interest or pursued me as a teenager. Or perfectly normal for me to try to seduce a 35-year-old when I was 15.
I never felt like a victim – and I might even still argue that I wasn’t victimized enough to claim that label, and instead call myself a product of a premature sexual experience. But for years, every time a man touched me – especially if he was older, even if I pursued him and told myself and him that it was ok – I’d catch myself looking through a non-existent dark window waiting for it to be over. Relationships came and went but never lasted, and I thought both that didn’t have anything to tell, and no one to tell it to.
Eventually, I told someone: after about eight months of dating my now-husband, who was curious and emotionally invested in “us” in a way I’d never experienced, I proudly called myself promiscuous. He looked at me with compassion and confusion and said, “Really?”. I confessed: “Not promiscuous in the way you would think.” And then I told him the truth.
And then I told someone else. And someone else after that. I chose to narrate my own story, rather than let the one Doug told persist any longer in my own mind.
Doug, like most abusers, relied on me not telling. They all rely on us not telling – to save their reputations, avoid consequences, and keep on abusing. Those of us who do tell, who let go of the shame we know we’re supposed to feel, are in such a minority that it enables the rest of you to disbelieve both those that tell and the existence of those who can’t yet. It’s hard for you to imagine being in a group of five women and knowing that one was sexually assaulted. It’s hard for me to believe that we can just go unheard – our experiences unknown – without consequence.
But all of that is why it’s so important for women, for abuse survivors, to tell our stories: because the more of us who do, the more we chip away at the ability to ignore or to choose not to believe. I believe – and I believe that you can choose to as well.

He is a child too? That post sounds like he's a grown man!
So Sarah are you suggesting that a parent has no control over what a 13 year old gets up to? That's it's going to happen anyway, so we may as well accept it. Does the same go for a child drinking, smoking, shoplifting?
No, but I don't see having sex with a boyfriend, in a safe environment, in a relationship in the same category as shoplifting. There's an appropriate way to be supportive.
No, but I don't see having sex with a boyfriend, in a safe environment, in a relationship in the same category as shoplifting. There's an appropriate way to be supportive.
A 13 year old is a child . I could net condone a child having sex. If she like to get drunk would would you also see that is done is a "safe environment"?
Yes actually, maybe not at 13. But lots of teenagers start drinking before 18. When I grew up we would have a few drinks at parents parties etc aged 16- a safe environment. Not in the park with a litre of vodka, behind their backs.
Regardless of age, for parents it will always be difficult to come to terms that their children are having sex. 13 is young but I guess when we're all in our 20s, 30s, 40s 13 seems even younger. She may be 13/14 but to me sounds far more mature than any 13/14 year old I know My 20 year step daughter acts like she's 14 most of the time! And as for my husband he acts 18 [emoji13] As long as she's careful, sensible and has the support around her, that is all that matters Locking them up and stopping her from seeing him will only make matters worse. What will the outcome of that be? If you want to ruin the relationship you have with her then do just that x she will forgive you one day x
Yes actually, maybe not at 13. But lots of teenagers start drinking before 18. When I grew up we would have a few drinks at parents parties etc aged 16- a safe environment. Not in the park with a litre of vodka, behind their backs.
We are not talking of 16 year olds though- we are taling about 13 years olds. So you suggest getting drunk at home at 13 is OK. Sarah I would suggest that neither of these scenarios is appropriate- either drinking vodka at home at 13 in a "safe" environment, not in the park. Same with sex at 13.
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I allow my 14 year old step son have a taste of beer, although he hated it! I would much rather him start the occasional one at home rather than peer pressure by friends
13 year olds are children . Nothing will convince me otherwise. They need our protection.
Not particularly helpful I feel and I hope you never find yourself in the OPs unenviable position. Kirsty - I feel your pain. I too have a 13 yo daughter - shes not 14 until next august! - and she has recently got her first boyfriend. She lied about who she was out with for 2 weeks (not where she was,, just who she was with) and I KNEW something was amiss. Obviously I was not happy about it to say the least but what can you do? Lock her away? Ground her indefinitely? Shes still got to go to school right?! I found out on a Tuesday and on the Friday she was bringing him round to meet me. Meeting him made me feel very strangely better. He was no man, he was a gangly 14 year old kid with braces. It was her father I was more worried about and I truly felt for him when I rang and tell him. Don't shoot the messenger I said. And he was devastated to hear this about his little girl. But the week after he paid for them to go to the cinema together, and the week after that he met him - albeit briefly! Even though hes my ex and I could strangle him sometimes, I was very proud of him for that as it must have been hard for him. But I took stock and was grateful that, after the initial lying, she was now being honest with me. Obviously I initially went mad and can 100% identify with ALL of your emotions!! But like I say, I took stock and realized that I cannot lock her up 24 hours a day and that at least she was being honest and open - even though it is early days and she insists that they will not be having sex, I however am a realist and realize that that may not always be the case! But I will cross that bridge when I have to! With regards to the comments of her being a child yadda yadda yadda, yes, she is, of course, a child, but children will be children and at that age they think they know it all don't they? I certainly did at 13! I also have a 17 year old son, would he be described as "a child"?? In the eyes of the law he certainly is but somehow that's acceptable. Huh. I think you are doing amazingly - if only we could laugh at this over a glass of wine! - and I totally understand your feelings towards her initially but you've taken a huge step in speaking to her again and she must be feeling incredibly relieved that this is all out in the open now. As I said to my daughter, she is a child playing an adults game but what are you going to gain by going mad about it? Ostracizing your daughter, making her sneak around behind your back anyway and exposing her to more danger. I think your handling of it is spot on! You don't mention his parents? Do they know about this? Are you friends with them? Could you talk with them about them being round his house so that can put your mind at rest a bit? I would rather have them round my house than possibly unsupervised at his maybe? No one can criticize you about it until they have walked a mile in your shoes. And Ive just put my trainers on to run to catch up with you! From one frazzled mother of a 13 year old girl to another - chin up and as long as you keep talking your daughter will hopefully look back at this episode and realize why you were so worried and be grateful that she had such a supportive mum to guide her and keep her safe. That's what I'm hoping anyway! xxxxxxxxxx
We are not talking of 16 year olds though- we are taling about 13 years olds. So you suggest getting d
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