Lifted Her Spanked Kids

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As the mother of a 12-year-old girl who insists on growing, it’s Twilight Zone-ish to know that, just a few short years ago, I was huffin’ and puffin’ in somebody’s delivery room and now that same little bundle of joy is wearing my clothes, borrowing my shoes, and rifling through my makeup (even though she doesn’t think I know).
Twelve years crawled by when I was a kid, but as a mom, it’s bolted by in lightning speed.
But like my mother and so many others, I have to remind Miss Preteen Thang every so often: you could wind up being in the friggin’ Guinness Book of World Records for rapidest growth spurt or tallest tween-ager. Doesn’t matter to me. If you get out of line, I will mount a chair, climb a step stool, or scale a ladder just to knock some sense into you. She can try her hand at being big and bad if she wants, but she’ll never be too big and bad to get smacked. Word to her mother.
Last month, the school nurses measured my baby. She is 5’4”. I am 5’4” and have been since I stopped growing when I was her age. But that recent reality check has done nothing for the way corrections are doled out in the Harris household. Sometimes taking away the netbook and the TV and the Facebook page and the activities with friends is appropriate, even — by golly — effective. But sometimes when she’s clearly lost her doggone mind, she needs a swift pop to bring her back to her senses.
I am a firm believer in corporal punishment. Not excessive, haphazard slaps, mind you. I think discussion and discipline go hand-in-hand. So whenever Skylar does find herself on the wrong side of my open palm, we talk about why it happened and how she can avoid it ever happening again. It takes quite a bit to get me to the point of getting physical, but I think it’s safe to say that every time it’s happened, homegirl earned it fair and square.
Now the question isn’t necessarily is she ever too big to be spanked. It’s when does it stop being effective? 
My mama is always threatening to beat somebody’s tail. And since I’m an only child, that somebody is usually me. Even though I haven’t gotten a bona fide spanking since I was in maybe seventh grade, she did dole out a couple of streetfighter-style butt whoopings when I was in high school. The last time — and by far the worst — was when she thought she caught me and this grimy boy in the aftershocks of sex.
It was all just really, really unfortunate timing. As she turned the corner, I was coming out of my bedroom and he was coming out of the hallway from the bathroom, still pulling up his zipper. Time froze for almost a solid 10 seconds as all three of us stood there at the intersection of gross misunderstanding and hell breaking loose. Then the hands of fury got to flyin’ and we both had to duck and run for cover. He could hop in a car and leave. I had to ward off Mama “Fast Knuckles” Harris all night.
I recently ran across that guy’s profile on Facebook and silently cursed him for causing all of that confusion. And to top it all off, he wasn’t even that cute. Still ain’t.   
What that incident taught me: 1) stay as far away from boys as possible in isolated parts of the house and 2) my mother was, is, and will always be the heaviest hitter I know. Some people joke about ruling with an iron fist. My mom really does.
Tips for Getting Your Kids Ready for a Virtual Doctor's Appointment
But I do remember clearly when spankings became part of going through the motions and stopped hurting as bad, not necessarily because they weren’t as painful (I did mention the iron fist, right?), but because I had gotten old enough to learn how to suck it up. I can tell my own daughter is entering that space where whoopings hurt her feelings more than her booty.
It’s probably pride and maybe a little self-awareness. You don’t have that when you’re a kid. You just want to dodge the paddling and if you’ve gotta take it, get it over with as fast as possible. There’s no real reflection time while you’re bent over your parent’s knee. That, dear friends, doesn’t happen until you’re back in your room with red flames of pain waving over your butt like dude in the Icy Hot commercial.
How old is too old to get physically disciplined a la spanking?
After a hard year of virtual school, most kids who attend a school outside of the home or aren't homeschooled will likely go back to the classroom this fall. Many parents are psyched, we're sure, whether it's to get their kids out of the house or to get back to normal, or both.
It's still early to think about homework, and hard to predict where we'll be come fall, but it's never too early for those deals, and we found retailers that already have them. Whether it's school supplies like glue, pencils, notebooks, and crayons, or a new pair of sneakers that actually fit, these stores have great sales on those type of items for back-to-school time.
Good news for Target addicts, which is likely everyone: Target has already kicked off the back-to-school deals online. At this moment, teachers have a big discount at 15% off classroom supplies. For everyone else, there's also a BOGO (Buy One Get One) 50% off on select backpacks, FUNtainers, and lunchboxes. More discounts will be coming, no doubt.
Staples is also a parent favorite when it comes to back-to-school shopping. The retailer has everything kids and teachers need to kick off the school year. The retailer has also started promoting its deals, specifically super low prices on supplies, which start at 97 cents. Currently, binders are going for less than $2 a piece.
It's important (and sometimes necessary) for parents to get constantly growing kids a fresh pair of shoes going into the school year. Adidas is prepared for the shoe rush and has already launched deals on certain sneakers as well as apparel. Shoppers just need to use the code "FRESH" at checkout to get money off of their order.
If we learned anything the last year and a half, it's that technology is crucial for staying connected and also for helping kids learn. For this school year, Apple has a sale on some of its tech products, including laptops and AirPods. Deals include the company's MacBook Air, which is on sale for $899 and comes with a free set of AirPods.
Macy's has a ton of items year-round for families, but it has great back-to-school items, too, from themed backpacks to clothes and more. This year, Macy's has already launched its back-to-school deals, which include backpacks starting at $24.99. Designs include Pokemon, uncicorns, Minecraft, and Roblox.
There's never too many places to shop for kicks and Nike is one of them. But a cool thing about the Nike brand is that it also has clothing, which makes its back-to-school sale super exciting. For example, these Nike React vision sneakers are 18% off. There's also a sale section on the website.
Will North Face ever go out of style? We don't think so. The brand has marked down some items for back-to-school season for parents who want to snag some fall and winter gear early, from fleeces to gloves, boots, and hats. There's also jacket deals for under $100 as well as backpack deals and hoodies for under $50.
Kohl's is a favorite place to shop for lots of people, whether it's back-to-school season or not. There's always great deals to be had. But it's an especially great place for back-to-school clothes and accessories. The store has T-shirts starting at $7.99, 25% off uniforms, denim for less than $20, and activewear for less than $30.
Price may vary from J.C. PenneySHOP
Is it back-to-school time without a J.C. Penney sale? We think not. The retailer sells everything from backpacks to water bottles, activewear, shoes, denim, and more. Pants are a particularly good bargain right now if you use the code 4BASICS to get up to 40% off.
Most people know they are likely to find lots of school supplies (and everything else) at Walmart. It has pens, pencils, markers, and other supplies ready to go for the school year. Of note are marble notebooks which have been marked down from 88 cents to 50 cents, because a kid can never have too many.
Zappos is the one-stop shop for all shoes needs at an affordable price. But the retailer is having sales that make its shoes even more of a must-buy item before kids head back to the classroom. Lots of the sneakers on sale have been marked down to under $100 while others in the $130 range are now $100-$115.
Bed Bath & Beyond is a dream for those who love to decorate their homes, but it's also an amazing place to shop for older kids who are heading off to college and have their dorms to furnish. The retailer has all a college-bound kid could want, from sheets and bedding to laundry bins and toiletries. Bed Bath & Beyond has a whole page on its site dedicated to college items and 20% off for shoppers who sign up for an account.
Gap has been around for decades, but that's only because it's tried and true when it comes to simple, long-lasting closet staples kids will need to have to get through the school year. For example, sale shirts and sweaters, which can also be used as part of a school uniform, are $10 to $20 off the original price. Some are $30 off.
Nordstrom isn't just a place to find dresses or high-end beauty products. It also has lots of great quality clothes and accessories for kids. And lots of those things are already on sale for back-to-school season. Vans that were $37 are now 40% off and down to $22. Also on sale are kids' shorts, sneakers, hoodies, and dresses.
Price may vary from Dollar TreeSHOP
Dollar Tree is underrated when it comes to school supplies. The retailer is affordable and have supplies that will get the job done this school year. Items being sold for cheaper prices (usually $1 for multi-packs) include almost all of the teacher section: Crayola crayons, colored pencils, glue, pencils, erasers, and more.
*Psst: if you choose to purchase an item from this post, CafeMom.com may receive a small cut. Each item and price is up to date at the time of publication; however, an item may be sold out or the price may be different at a later date.
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As the mother of a 12-year-old girl who insists on growing, it’s Twilight Zone-ish to know that, just a few short years ago, I was huffin’ and puffin’ in somebody’s delivery room and now that same little bundle of joy is wearing my clothes, borrowing my shoes, and rifling through my makeup (even though she doesn’t think I know).
Twelve years crawled by when I was a kid, but as a mom, it’s bolted by in lightning speed.
But like my mother and so many others, I have to remind Miss Preteen Thang every so often: you could wind up being in the friggin’ Guinness Book of World Records for rapidest growth spurt or tallest tween-ager. Doesn’t matter to me. If you get out of line, I will mount a chair, climb a step stool, or scale a ladder just to knock some sense into you. She can try her hand at being big and bad if she wants, but she’ll never be too big and bad to get smacked. Word to her mother.
Last month, the school nurses measured my baby. She is 5’4”. I am 5’4” and have been since I stopped growing when I was her age. But that recent reality check has done nothing for the way corrections are doled out in the Harris household. Sometimes taking away the netbook and the TV and the Facebook page and the activities with friends is appropriate, even — by golly — effective. But sometimes when she’s clearly lost her doggone mind, she needs a swift pop to bring her back to her senses.
I am a firm believer in corporal punishment. Not excessive, haphazard slaps, mind you. I think discussion and discipline go hand-in-hand. So whenever Skylar does find herself on the wrong side of my open palm, we talk about why it happened and how she can avoid it ever happening again. It takes quite a bit to get me to the point of getting physical, but I think it’s safe to say that every time it’s happened, homegirl earned it fair and square.
Now the question isn’t necessarily is she ever too big to be spanked. It’s when does it stop being effective? 
My mama is always threatening to beat somebody’s tail. And since I’m an only child, that somebody is usually me. Even though I haven’t gotten a bona fide spanking since I was in maybe seventh grade, she did dole out a couple of streetfighter-style butt whoopings when I was in high school. The last time — and by far the worst — was when she thought she caught me and this grimy boy in the aftershocks of sex.
It was all just really, really unfortunate timing. As she turned the corner, I was coming out of my bedroom and he was coming out of the hallway from the bathroom, still pulling up his zipper. Time froze for almost a solid 10 seconds as all three of us stood there at the intersection of gross misunderstanding and hell breaking loose. Then the hands of fury got to flyin’ and we both had to duck and run for cover. He could hop in a car and leave. I had to ward off Mama “Fast Knuckles” Harris all night.
I recently ran across that guy’s profile on Facebook and silently cursed him for causing all of that confusion. And to top it all off, he wasn’t even that cute. Still ain’t.   
What that incident taught me: 1) stay as far away from boys as possible in isolated parts of the house and 2) my mother was, is, and will always be the heaviest hitter I know. Some people joke about ruling with an iron fist. My mom really does.
Tips for Getting Your Kids Ready for a Virtual Doctor's Appointment
But I do remember clearly when spankings became part of going through the motions and stopped hurting as bad, not necessarily because they weren’t as painful (I did mention the iron fist, right?), but because I had gotten old enough to learn how to suck it up. I can tell my own daughter is entering that space where whoopings hurt her feelings more than her booty.
It’s probably pride and maybe a little self-awareness. You don’t have that when you’re a kid. You just want to dodge the paddling and if you’ve gotta take it, get it over with as fast as possible. There’s no real reflection time while you’re bent over your parent’s knee. That, dear friends, doesn’t happen until you’re back in your room with red flames of pain waving over your butt like dude in the Icy Hot commercial.
How old is too old to get physically disciplined a la spanking?
After a hard year of virtual school, most kids who attend a school outside of the home or aren't homeschooled will likely go back to the classroom this fall. Many parents are psyched, we're sure, whether it's to get their kids out of the house or to get back to normal, or both.
It's still early to think about homework, and hard to predict where we'll be come fall, but it's never too early for those deals, and we found retailers that already have them. Whether it's school supplies like glue, pencils, notebooks, and crayons, or a new pair of sneakers that actually fit, these stores have great sales on those type of items for back-to-school time.
Good news for Target addicts, which is likely everyone: Target has already kicked off the back-to-school deals online. At this moment, teachers have a big discount at 15% off classroom supplies. For everyone else, there's also a BOGO (Buy One Get One) 50% off on select backpacks, FUNtainers, and lunchboxes. More discounts will be coming, no doubt.
Staples is also a parent favorite when it comes to back-to-school shopping. The retailer has everything kids and teachers need to kick off the school year. The retailer has also started promoting its deals, specifically super low prices on supplies, which start at 97 cents. Currently, binders are going for less than $2 a piece.
It's important (and sometimes necessary) for parents to get constantly growing kids a fresh pair of shoes going into the school year. Adidas is prepared for the shoe rush and has already launched deals on certain sneakers as well as apparel. Shoppers just need to use the code "FRESH" at checkout to get money off of their order.
If we learned anything the last year and a half, it's that technology is crucial for staying connected and also for helping kids learn. For this school year, Apple has a sale on some of its tech products, including laptops and AirPods. Deals include the company's MacBook Air, which is on sale for $899 and comes with a free set of AirPods.
Macy's has a ton of items year-round for families, but it has great back-to-school items, too, from themed backpacks to clothes and more. This year, Macy's has already launched its back-to-school deals, which include backpacks starting at $24.99. Designs include Pokemon, uncicorns, Minecraft, and Roblox.
There's never too many places to shop for kicks and Nike is one of them. But a cool thing about the Nike brand is that it also has clothing, which makes its back-to-school sale super exciting. For example, these Nike React vision sneakers are 18% off. There's also a sale section on the website.
Will North Face ever go out of style? We don't think so. The brand has marked down some items for back-to-school season for parents who want to snag some fall and winter gear early, from fleeces to gloves, boots, and hats. There's also jacket deals for under $100 as well as backpack deals and hoodies for under $50.
Kohl's is a favorite place to shop for lots of people, whether it's back-to-school season or not. There's always great deals to be had. But it's an especially great place for back-to-school clothes and accessories. The store has T-shirts starting at $7.99, 25% off uniforms, denim for less than $20, and activewear for less than $30.
Price may vary from J.C. PenneySHOP
Is it back-to-school time without a J.C. Penney sale? We think not. The retailer sells everything from backpacks to water bottles, activewear, shoes, denim, and more. Pants are a particularly good bargain right now if you use the code 4BASICS to get up to 40% off.
Most people know they are likely to find lots of school supplies (and everything else) at Walmart. It has pens, pencils, markers, and other supplies ready to go for the school year. Of note are marble notebooks which have been marked down from 88 cents to 50 cents, because a kid can never have too many.
Zappos is the one-stop shop for all shoes needs at an affordable price. But the retailer is having sales that make its shoes even more of a must-buy item before kids head back to the classroom. Lots of the sneakers on sale have been marked down to under $100 while others in the $130 range are now $100-$115.
Bed Bath & Beyond is a dream for those who love to decorate their homes, but it's also an amazing place to shop for older kids who are heading off to college and have their dorms to furnish. Th
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