Lesby trio
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Lesby trio
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Rose (right) considers Jacqui her “life partner.” Courtesy of Theresa Rose
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In 2020, Theresa Rose celebrated her husband’s birthday by engaging in a threesome with another woman. But her husband’s taste for sexual adventure backfired: Just a few weeks later, she left him and filed for divorce.
“Experiencing that intimate interaction with a woman for the first time, the physical and emotional depth was [so intense], I was like, ‘Oh my God, this is what’s been missing,’ ” Rose, 36, told The Post. (She requested to be referred to as “Rose,” which is her middle name, in order to protect her identity.)
She’s among a growing number of women leaving their husbands for other women. Many of them have been high-profile romances. Glennon Doyle wrote a best-seller, “Untamed,” about leaving her husband for women’s soccer star Abby Wambach. Former “The Real Housewives of Orange County” star Braunwyn Windham-Burke, 44, came out as gay in 2020 but remains married to husband Sean Burke — while getting hot and heavy with girlfriend Victoria Brito. And socialite Debby Hymowitz set Upper East Side tongues wagging over a decade ago when she left her hedge-fund husband, Gregg, for SoulCycle instructor Stacey Griffith.
Raised Catholic in Orange County, California, Rose was taught that “all gays go to hell.” She spent her early life downplaying crushes on rocker Pink and actresses Megan Fox, Carmen Electra and Jessica Alba as innocent admiration until she couldn’t deny her true feelings any longer.
“After being with that woman, I said to myself, ‘This is why I’ve been so unhappy in my marriage,’ ” said Rose. “My relationship with my husband, emotionally, felt so shallow and lonely compared to my connection with the woman.”
According to sexual fluidity researcher Lisa Diamond, Rose’s delayed awakening to her same-sex inclination is not uncommon.
“Many women have a broader capacity for diverse forms of sexual desire — for multiple partners, for same-gender partners, etc. — than they might be aware,” Diamond, a University of Utah psychology and gender studies professor, told The Post.
“As women, we are raised to assume that we are heterosexual, and [are taught to] focus on finding the right male partner,” the analyst added, noting the longstanding societal pressures on women to conform to a more conventional lifestyle.
But Diamond has found that when straight-identifying women either reach a plateau in their marriages, encounter life-changing milestones or illnesses, or become empty-nesters, they’re more likely to become more “in touch” with their previously uncharted sexual curiosities .
“It’s not that these women suddenly become gay or bisexual,” said Diamond. “They may have always had a capacity for same-gender relationships, but may have never had the opportunity to even ask themselves whether this was a possibility for them.”
Clinical psychologist Sheryl Kingsberg told The Post that there are likely “both psychological and biological underpinnings” in some women that ultimately awaken an inner “shift” toward a desire for same-sex partnership.
However, she notes that research has yet to identify the cause of the sexual transition.
“The biological underpinnings are unknown,” said Kingsberg, chief of behavioral medicine at University Hospitals Cleveland Medical Center. “Maybe it’s hormonal or maybe it’s neuroendocrine, which is an epigenetic shift in brain chemistry that is hormone-based,” she continued. “But it’s certainly a shift.”
Many in Rose’s life have not reacted well to her shift.
“After I told my husband about my feelings after my experience with the woman, he got really nasty,” she said. “He outed me to my very conservative parents, our mutual friends and our Bible study group.”
In the wake of her non-consensual outing, Rose purchased a gun and contemplated suicide due to the ridicule she endured from her loved ones. But, before carrying out the deed, she met and began dating a woman named Jacqui, whom she credits with saving her life. They’ve been going strong for over a year and moved to Portland, Oregon, together to raise Rose’s two young sons.
Meanwhile, Rose has become estranged from her mother and father, who’ve removed her from their will.
But, pangs of familial and religious alienation notwithstanding, Rose is now happily uninhibited and identifies as an atheist, not a Catholic. She also offers support and encouragement to more than 132,000 late-in-life or “late-blooming” lesbians via TikTok under the handle @ Raising2Activists — a username dedicated to her “super supportive” sons, 6 and 8.
“It feels so free to finally live authentically.”
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