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Search online to see if there are any LGBTQ community center or pride events in your area. Even if there's nothing that official, you can use sites like meetup.com to search for LGBTQ-friendly events.

lgbtcenters.org has a database of community centers in the United States.
If you are not fully out, attend events in neighboring towns where you are less likely to run into someone you know.

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This doesn't need to be someone you know well, or that you're attracted to. A coworker, friend of a friend, former classmate — any local, out queer woman or nonbinary lesbian can introduce you to the LGBTQ community in your area, or recommend queer-friendly places to hang out. [1]
X
Research source

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If you're lucky enough to live in a place where LGBTQ folks can gather openly, take advantage of it. This is a nerve wracking step for many newly out or semi-closeted lesbians, but gather up your confidence and get out there. If your town doesn't have a lesbian-specific bar, visit the gay bar to see if it attracts a wider LGBTQ clientele.

If you're not interested in a party or hookup scene, show up on a weekday evening. The atmosphere will be more relaxed and friendly conversation will be easier.
Straight bars are rarely a good place to look for same-gender dates. Only about 11% of U.S. lesbians in a relationship met their partner in a bar or restaurant, which might be related to the small and shrinking number of LGBTQ bars. [2]
X
Research source

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Look for bands with a large queer or lesbian fan base performing in your area. Note that this doesn't just mean bands with LGBTQ musicians (although it helps). If you think that lead singer is attractive, you're probably not alone.

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You don't need to attend a rainbow-themed roller derby club to meet other lesbians. The more time you spend in social activities, the better the chance of meeting people who catch your interest. Whether it's attending classes at a community center or joining a sports team, picking up a hobby is a great way to meet like-minded people. Even just starting conversations at the gym or getting to know progressive coworkers can help you make friends, and potentially something more.

Small towns may only have one or two locations where LGBT people are comfortable meeting openly. In that case, it may be easier to make your first connections with that community online or through LGBT events.
Go out to places on your own sometimes instead of always going out with friends. You're more likely to be approached by someone if you're by yourself. [3]
X
Expert Source

Christina Jay, NLP Matchmaker & Certified Life Coach

Expert Interview. 11 February 2020.

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