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Lesbian Light Bondage
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Do you own a scarf? Then you’re ready.
If you're looking for a surefire way to spice things up in the bedroom, your mind might jump to handcuffs. But I'll do you one better: Try using rope.
ICYDK, if you're looking to dip a toe into kink , bondage is a great place to start. Most of the tools you need to fulfill your BDSM fantasies are lying around your house already. But, before you grab the nearest bandana and strap your partner to a kitchen chair, there are a few things you should know.
Establishing how to approach rope bondage might be an intimidating process if you've never tried it. Before you and your partner get into it, many experts suggest it’s a good idea to agree on your desired roles and boundaries. For example, figure out whether you'd rather be the dominant partner who takes on more leadership and control, or would you rather be the submissive one, who prefers to give up that control to their partner.
You should also talk to your partner about what you do/don't want done to you, how much pressure you’re into, and what safe word will signal when one of you has had enough.
If this isn’t your first time incorporating BDSM into your partnership, then this process might be second nature to you. But either way, preparation beforehand is always necessary. Here’s a few things to keep in mind before getting started.
Research is a must if it’s your first time using rope. Get familiar with what positions you want to try out and how to execute them properly. There are plenty of websites you can check out dedicated to explaining rope play. Elle Chase , CSE, ACS, a certified sex educator, recommends Remedial Ropes as a good place to start learning. Doing sufficient research will give you a better sense of where to tie, how tight, etc., says Chase.
If you’re interested in trying rope play or any other form of BDSM, consent should be an ongoing conversation. "Consent, communication, and trust are essential for a strong relationship—sexual or otherwise," says Chase. "Incorporating consensual bondage into sex play builds and fortifies essential trust between partners, and requires that communication be deft and clear."
Aside from doing your own research, there are also classes and workshops you can attend to get some real hands-on experience, says Francesca Gentille , PhD, clinical sexologist and professor at the International Institute of Clinical Sexology. Rope bondage is never risk-free as there is the possibility for nerve damage amongst other things, so it’s best for all participants to familiarize themselves with any safety issues that can pop up during practice. "Think R.A.C.K. (Risk Aware Consensual Kink)," says Gentille.
With safety being the priority, it doesn’t hurt to create some sort of escape plan in the event of an emergency. A good option is keeping the ties that bind the wrists and ankles loose until you get comfortable, says Chase. As you get better with the ties and make them tighter, you can also have a pair of safety scissors handy just in case, adds Gentile.
If executed correctly and with caution, a strong bond of trust can be formed between you and your partner. " When the rope tier, rigger, or dominant listens well, notices beautifully, and attunes to the one being tied, there is a sense of growing intimacy, anticipation, and arousal," say Gentille.
Aftercare is always needed after a scene and is usually negotiated before you start a scene. The purpose of aftercare is to make sure both participants level out mentally and physically. For scenes that can be physically depleting, Gentille recommends a blanket, snacks, and a bottle of water. She also adds that it’s a good idea to check in with your partner a few days after to see if anything other thoughts or feelings have come up. “Aftercare (done well), both immediately after a scene or session, and days later, is an opportunity to deepen your relationship, build trust, and hold space for any triggers and healing,” says Gentille. “If not handled well the opposite can happen. [You] can break trust or rewound and trigger feelings of abandonment [in your partner].”
Once the specifics are out of the way, then it's finally time to play. If you don't have any rope casually laying around your home, don’t worry. Plenty of other household items, like a scarf or a tie, can serve as great alternatives. Whatever tool you've got on hand, get ready to explore these 18 best bondage positions:
How to: Missionary is the easiest possible position for beginner bondage. Simply lie on your back with your arms above your head and your legs spread, then have your partner bind your wrists and ankles to the bed frame.
Licensed sex therapist Vanessa Marin recommended Sportsheets’ under-the-bed restraint system ($29, amazon.com ) in a previous interview with Women's Health , because its velcro cuffs are easily removable for a quick escape if/when you decide you no longer want to be bound.
How to: Have your partner lie on their back and bind their wrists and ankles, either together or to the bed frame, with a silk scarf, a tie, or heck, even your own underwear. Once they’re adequately restrained, straddle them facing forward or away, whichever you prefer.
Because they’re tied down, you can switch it up as often as you see fit—playing with your clit, or maybe pulsing a bullet vibe on your partner's perineum, nipples, or clit (try the Tenga Iroha Stick, $20, amazon.com ). Basically, you get to do whatever you want—you’re in charge.
Whether you opt for standard or reverse cowgirl, woman-on-top positions provide a perfect opportunity for you to take complete control.
How to: Lie with your stomach flat on the mattress (or wherever you’re going to be having sex) and have your partner bind your wrists together over your head. Maybe have them blindfold you , too, because why the hell not?
Then, have them lift your hips to enter you from behind, keeping your shoulders down and your knees rooted while he (or she) thrusts.
How to: Bend over and have your partner bind your wrists to your ankles, with your feet anchored shoulder-width apart for better balance.
Have your partner enter you from behind, keeping their hands on your hips to make sure you don’t topple over. Try a hands-free couples vibrator, like the Eva II ($135), for added clitoral stimulation.
How to: Lie down with your back flush to the mattress and then lift your hips into the air, as if you were doing a bridge in yoga. Then, have your partner bind your wrists behind your back and grab your butt, so you can wrap your legs around their waist as they thrust. (This one is like the leap frog, but in reverse.)
How to: For this one, grab a sturdy chair and park your partner’s butt in it. Then, tie their wrists and ankles to the frame, and once they’re ready to go—after a little oral sex , maybe—straddle them and pump up and down. Whether you face them or turn away is entirely up to you.
How to: First, grab two ties, one for your eyes and one for your wrists. Have your partner blindfold you and bind your wrists in front of you, so they hang down by your hips. Once you’re all tied up, they can take the reins in foreplay, before rolling you onto your side and entering you from behind. As they rock into you, they can surprise you with nipple tweaks and strokes, keeping stimulation on your clit. The best part: You get to lie back and enjoy the feels.
A big part of what makes spoon sex such a winner: Easy access to the clit and nips.
How to: Have your partner kneel and sit back on their legs. Loosely bind their wrists together behind their back and sit with your back facing your partner's front. From there, straddle your partner's thighs, bending your knees so that your legs are alongside your partners. Your partner can then use their hips to thrust, without using their arms or legs.
How to: Have your partner sit in an armless chair with their ankles loosely bound together and their wrist tied together behind the back of the chair. Face your partner and straddle their lap. For extra leverage, hold onto your partner's shoulders while you ride.
How to: To best introduce bondage in a knees-to-chest position, have your partner bind your ankles and calves together. Then, while you’re lying on your back, drape your legs over his shoulder as your partner penetrates you. You can also make use of those restraints or even cuffs, and have your partner bind your wrists above your head.
How to: For this one, assume roughly the same position as leap frog, but have your partner handcuff your wrists behind your back and spread your legs. They should kneel between your legs and enter you from behind while your body is flat against the mattress, ground, kitchen table, wherever. Then, have them reach a hand around to stroke your clitoris —because to neglect it would be very rude indeed.
How to: Lying on your back with your legs spread wide, have your partner straddle you while facing your toes. Once they’re situated, wrap your legs around their waist and tip your pelvis up, allowing them to slide back and enter you.
Then, grab your anal toy of choice, lubricate it generously, and work it while your partner rides. (Please note, anal always goes better when the receiving party is really aroused, so preface this position with plenty of foreplay.)
Because the butt is right there, other teasing options include slaps and pinches. If your partner has balls, Snow Angel also gives you prime access: Consider some light testicular tugging, whatever your partner is comfortable with and enjoys.
How to: First things first, ready your restraints, whether that’s the aforementioned under-the-bed system or simply scarves or rope. Have your partner bind your wrists, either to the bed frame or above your head, while you lie in missionary position. Then, spread your legs in a V-shape and lift them toward your head. Have your partner help with this, pushing your ankles back (as far as feels good for you) and holding them in place while they thrust.
Easy to execute without too much maneuvering, the Valedictorian remains a classic because it offers solid G-spot stimulation in combination with a good stretch.
How to: For this position, bend over the bed and have your partner bind your ankles, and then wrists together. Have your partner stand behind you with one leg on either side of yours and enter. Your partner can use their free hands to stimulate other areas, like the nipples or clitoris.
How to: For a more advanced option, have your partner secure the leg tie so that both legs are locked together. From there, your partner can either spoon you while on the bed or can stand up for more leverage.
How to: Have your partner complete a simple box tie so that your wrists are tied in a horizontal position and then tied across the chest and shoulders to create a harness. From there, have your partner stand up or lean over the side of the bed for genital or anal entrance, says Amanda Pasciucco , a certified sex therapist in Connecticut.
How to: Have your partner tie you so that your legs are bent at the knees and your thighs are pressed to your chest (kind of like a fetal position). While this position may be trickier for penetration, it's a great option for other forms of play.
How to: Have your partner tie your ankles together. Then have them tie your wrists behind your back, and tie the wrists and ankles together.
This tie can be a great option for giving or receiving oral sex. ( Note: Beginners should opt for cuffs or clips that can be easily removed instead of rope as some people may struggle to breathe in this position.)
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Home > Dating & Sex > 30 Kinky BDSM Ideas to Try with your SO Tonight
You may have already heard of the four-letter term BDSM at any time in the past – but when it is actually uttered, thoughts of toys, positions, and rules may be quite overwhelming… scary even! To some, we don’t even know what the word implies. If you’re looking for BDSM ideas, you’ve come to the right place.
For starters, BDSM stands for Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sadism/Masochism. All these are subs in the wide world of kinks. For a lot of people, BDSM is something new. It can be an opportunity to explore ideas of power and control. It can also be a chance for you to discover things you never knew could turn you on.
And while BDSM can be all of these elements, it can also sometimes just be bondage sex or any other element alone. No need to pressure yourself into getting into all these when your or your SO’s comfort level is just at bondage or some other element.
Also, BDSM may not necessarily mean penetration and is just a standalone exercise for sexual satisfaction.
If there is one thing we would like to emphasize enough, it is that when going into BDSM, you should always take into your utmost consideration your and your SO’s safety. As such, we have rounded up a few things to include in your checklist before going into BDSM.
And so update your kink list as we give you the best of everything BDSM – from role-playing, essentials, to positions – here are 30 of the hottest BDSM ideas you can get into tonight!
This is perhaps one of the most popular fantasies in both men and women. The teacher and student scenario can come in two different ways. Both the “I failed my last exam and I will do anything to get a passing grade” + unzip pants scenario; or the “You are a bad student and needs to be punished” + unzip pants scenario are both hot options.
Both ways, the pants fall to the floor, and that’s what we’re all concerned about.
We know they’re supposed to be in the kitchen but the maid just made you so mad! Punish the maid and let her see who’s boss.
This is one of the most popular BDSM ideas and is just perfect timing to use those handcuffs. Cuff her nice and good and start the interrogations for the bad things she’s done.
A comprehensive physical exam is being called for. Tell your patient you want her in excellent physical health and so… take that dress off and bend over.
Don’t forget to reprimand her for not following doctor’s orders!
A secretary with bad work ethics can be made badder. Reprimand her in more ways than the memo for not submitting the reports on time.
Another of those BDSM ideas that while popular, works!
One of the most popular BDSM games around is when daddy’s little girl got naughty today. She needs to be punished. Pigtails, lollipops, and a good amount of spanking never grow old.
What does she mean she cannot pay for the pizza you delivered? Make your way in and let her know she can pay you in another way.
Put your pet on a leash and make sure she doesn’t scratch the furniture. Or have her sit on your lap or tie her to a bedpost so she doesn’t wander around; or for extreme plays, have her get inside a cage when she misbehaves.
And here’s one more. Have her eat from a bowl on the floor.
The villainess is captured. Tie her up and make sure to get her out of that tight-fitting costume to reveal her real identity. And make sure to castigate her for all the bad things she’s done.
Wrestling is always the perfect prologue to hot, kinky encounters.
There is just something in this BDSM game that’s sizzling, what with you being pinned down by that hot, wrestler chick. And just when she thinks she’s winning, you overpower her and gain the upper hand. You stay on top amidst all that squirming.
Any form of verbal degradation and humiliation can be extremely kinky if (let’s make that a big IF), you both take pleasure in this kind of play.
Note: always discuss and respect boundaries first.
Exciting times ahead as you go out to dinner or a party with her not wearing anything behind that dress. You can also have her wear a sex toy, a vibrator perhaps. And right in the smack of the public eye, put on your naughtiest and press that button that connects to the vibrator. See how much your SO tries to stifle a groan, a moan, and everything hot.
A vibrator is just one of the many basic toys you can incorporate in your BDSM adventures. Read on to find out more about these essentials.
While we’ve discussed mostly BDSM ideas on role-playing, much of these require sex toys , restraints, and must-have essentials, one of which is the ball gag .
We’ve been taught not to talk when the mouth is full. The gag is not just merely teaching it; it is enforcing it. Gags are ideal for limiting your SO’s speech and breathing. Tie her up, gag her and you get a submissive that’s bowing down to your every wish.
It is also usual to find the sub drooling while wearing a gag and that adds a bit more humiliation for the SO wearing it. That’s good enough punishment as it is.
BDSM toys and must-haves are all about limiting one or more senses of the sub. As such, blindfolds and hoods are just some of the most popular BDSM essentials around.
Depriving one of your senses intensifies the other remaining sensory structures and so, in an attempt to even up, most would feel the intensity in their sense of smell or taste.
Going back to the blindfold, most that are sold have aesthetic considerations in mind but if you are good with just about anything, a scarf or a sleep mask would do just fine.
Usually made of leather, a BDSM collar can also double up as a leash when needed but aside from these uses, collars are worn by the sub that is in a relationship signifying ownership. Sort of like an “I am taken” signal. Or to make it simple, it is a wedding ring in the world of BDSM.
Floggers , riding crops, and paddles are very common examples of spanking tools. Each of these also has varying degrees of pain caused, starting with the floggers that causes just a little bit of pain to riding crops that are on the stingy part of the pain, to paddles that causes much of a thud than a sting.
Careful with the spanking tools as they can cause unwanted pain when incorrectly used but when the little girl is bad, daddy needs to spank!
Canes and rods are also spanking tools but cause much pain when incorrectly used so it is always wise to exercise caution while swinging and not get overly carried away with the spanking.
When canes and rods are causing that much pain, whips are on a different level. Get yourself practiced and your whip-exp
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