Katy Annxo Stepmom Son Jerk Off Instruction

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To The Guy Who Masturbated In Front Of Me, Thank You
Mom, Actress, and host of the Motherhood in Hollywood podcast.
Something awful to me happened today. I feel the need to share this story because this awful thing has happened to millions of women and we need to talk about it.
This morning I dropped my daughter off at school and decided to walk to a nearby coffee shop. I was checking my texts as I waited on the corner for the light to turn and a car pulled up next to me.
A man inside said, “Excuse me, Miss?” and I looked up.
There it was on full display. He had his penis out and was vigorously masturbating. I didn’t scream. I didn’t run. I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of getting off even more by thinking that he’d shocked me.
As I casually looked back down at my phone he kept going, pleading with me to look at him. I slowly started to walk away from the corner and he followed me in his car. He was saying things that he liked about my clothes, and how I looked. I assume it was to get my attention again.
But it didn’t work. I didn’t look up from my phone. I can’t pinpoint where exactly I heard it, but I seem to remember someone telling me that men who do this get their rocks off even more if you react to them. Or essentially, if they get caught in the act it’s the ultimate high.
Eventually, he drove off and I could still see out of the corner of my eye his arm moving up and down as he went. Maybe I should have screamed or yelled like this woman did. But I don’t think it really fully dawned on me what was happening until he drove away.
Did that asshole just whip out his dick at 9 a.m., near a school, and jerk off at me? Yes, he did. Then I got mad. And when I told this story on my Facebook page I got even more angry. That’s because dozens of women, friends of mine, all had similar stories about men pulling out their penis and masturbating in front of them.
Some friends shared stories of this happening to them while on the train, or a bus when they couldn’t escape. And on another level of disturbing behavior, is how many women said this happened to them when they were little girls.
“I had something similar happen to me when I was a child. It leaves you feeling dirty/violated.”
“Same thing happened to me when I was in high school. It is so jarring and upsetting.”
Some say it’s happened not just once, but multiple times in restaurants, on the subway, and in parking lots. The stories go on and on, and I can’t help thinking...why? Why is this happening to so many women and there’s no way to stop it? And why is it mostly men who are doing this to women?
And as one friend put it, “That’s what “locker room talk” leads to.” Men, stop letting other men do this! Step up and tell your buddies this is not okay!
I’ve been going back and forth all day between emotions. Angry that this asshat will probably do this to someone else. And troubled because he is clearly mentally disturbed and needs help. But the bigger picture here is that there are probably thousands of men like him in the world that will continue to do this to women. There’s probably someone reading this right now who will do this to a woman or little girl.
It’s a violation. It’s a mental health crisis. It’s sexual assault.
All I can think about is my daughter. If something like this happened to me and so many wonderful women I know, then there’s a good chance one day it will happen to her and that pisses me off. But now because of today’s events, you can bet I will be even more vigilant in arming her with tools to handle it if it does.
So to the guy who masturbated in front of me today, thank you. Thank you for opening my eyes to a wide-spread problem I had no idea so many women have experienced. Thank you for making me hyper-aware of this issue moving forward. And thank you for instilling in me the urgency to teach my daughter that this type of violation against women is not okay. Never will be. And we won’t stand for it. Now put your penis away and get help.
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Image: Stuart Pitkin/Getty Images. Design: Ashley Britton/SheKnows.
It’s 2020. Why are we still embarrassed to talk about masturbation? It’s an unspoken rite of humanity; most of us do it, yet very few of us talk about it, and even fewer discuss it with our children. Like eating or breathing, sexual urges are a natural part of our biology, and by telling our children otherwise, we can set them up for a lifetime of sexual shame. If there’s anything to feel guilty about here, it’s whether we as parents are doing the best we can to erase this unnecessary stigma for our children.
I remember the first time I discovered masturbation; I was only 9 years old. I had a sudden desire to see what the bathtub water from the faucet would feel like on my vulva — and I experienced a pleasant surprise. Suddenly, I couldn’t wait to take a bath each night.
But I also became paranoid that I was doing something “bad.” Somehow, in my young mind, I correlated masturbation with dirtiness, and my self-pleasure became a burden of shame that I carried for years. 
When did the shame surrounding masturbation begin? Some of us learned it at church or through our parents, others through social encounters or mainstream media. Regardless of its origins in each of our life stories, this stigma has a long-lasting psychologically damaging effect that teaches children to be ashamed of their desire and their bodies, which can lead to sexual issues or depression down the line. 
A post shared by Sex Positive Families, LLC (@sexpositive_families) on Feb 21, 2020 at 4:21am PST
Eventually, though, even I learned that masturbation is a totally normal, natural human activity. By the time I became a mother, I was firmly in the pro-self-pleasure camp. Still, it was difficult to gauge when to discuss masturbation with my kids. But when my sons hit puberty, my husband and I agreed it was time to talk to them about all aspects of sex, including the solo variety. My husband explained ejaculation and wet dreams to them so that they wouldn’t be embarrassed or scared when that happened (which it did, many times).
I taught them that it’s totally normal to touch their private parts, as long as it happens in private. I also taught them about consent and inappropriate touch.
Of course, this talk left my sons embarrassed. But that doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth it; as it turns out, they had already discovered self-stimulation and, like so many of us, were uncertain as to whether what they were doing was normal. I saw visible relief on each of their faces when they learned how widespread masturbation is, and that as long as it’s something they enjoy privately and that doesn’t take over their lives, it’s safe and healthy.
Today, my sons are healthy, functioning young men who have so far managed to stave off every masturbation myth in the book (all that stuff about blindness, broken genitalia, and infertility? Yikes). And although I didn’t realize it when I first talked to my sons about self-stimulation, there are many health benefits enjoyed by those who regularly masturbate. It can decrease the risk of prostate cancer and type-2 diabetes while boosting our mood (thanks, endorphins) and relaxing us so we can fall asleep easier. 
Sure, I witnessed my sons make a few terrible jerk-off jokes over the years (preteen boy humor will be preteen boy humor). But that’s honestly the only negative aspect of de-stigmatizing masturbation in our home. And for my sons to grow up living shame-free lives with a healthy attitude towards sexuality and their bodies — all in exchange for one awkward conversation and a couple lame jokes? Definitely worth it. 
It’s not a matter of life and death, people. It’s just orgasms.
A version of this story was originally published in September 2016.
These masturbation positions prove you don’t need a partner to have a good time.
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Katy Annxo Stepmom Son Jerk Off Instruction