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Because there's more than one way to rub one out.
To help you get some new ideas, BuzzFeed asked people of all ages, genders, and sexualities to describe the nitty-gritty of how they actually masturbate. Here are tips from our readers with penises that you might want to try yourself.
"I have a body pillow with a super soft cover, and I recently discovered that folding it over and screwing it is quite the amazing substitute. The biggest and best Os I've ever had and my hand is enjoying its vacation."
"I get hand lotion, mix it with some petroleum jelly, and put it in a plastic baggie. I put the baggie on my cock and wank for five minutes. I stop, and wait to get a little harder, then wank til I cum.”
"What really works for me is JOI (Jerk Off Instruction), type of porn where someone — usually a woman — gives you specific instructions on what to do. Instructions including how fast to go, how long for, and sometimes asking you to eat the semen you've just produced."
"I use my girlfriend's vibrator on and around my balls. The vibrator really amplifies things. Wish I would have known about that when I was in high school."
"I always take a super soft blanket and lay it down on my bed, usually folded a few times to make it thicker. Then I set up some porn on my laptop and just lay on my stomach with my dick against the blanket. Then I just move my hips back and forth or up and down so my dick would rub against the blanket until I orgasm."
"Most commonly, I just jack off and I lube up a finger or two and stick them up in my butt. Let me tell you: It feels awesome to have both your prostate and your penis stimulated at the same time."
"I have a variety of toys that go in my butt — plugs, dildos, beads, and a prostate massager. I will start with a dildo. As I get closer to orgasm, I switch from my dildo/whatever is in my ass, to my prostate massager. The vibrations added with pushing it in and out usually drive me crazy to the point where I just grab my dick and jerk it until I cum."
"Seriously, it's worth it. Girls can have vibrators and dildos and stuff — it should be just as acceptable for guys to have toys that feel like having sex. Fleshlight reigns supreme, but Tenga Eggs are cheap and available on Amazon Prime."
"I usually enjoy watching myself get hard and get off over my webcam and pretending like people are watching. I'm not enough of an exhibitionist to actually stream it anywhere, but it helps turn me on."
"Try not to come too quick. When you feel it start to pop, STOP. Wait until things have calmed back down then do the whole thing three or four more times."
"Instead of stroking the shaft, I usually press my penis down flat and just rub the head rapidly — and lightly at first — with one hand and the other hand pressed on top for added pressure."
"The two-finger method just under the tip and rubbing the under portion of the shaft is the quickest way I get off."
"Instead of gripping it and jerking like most guys, I lay my penis flat on my belly and rub it until I cum. Almost like rolling dough into a breadstick shape."
"I squeeze and rub my nipples when I masturbate. It feels better."
16. Try out some alternative underwear choices to switch things up.
"Don't knock until you try it. My girlfriend had me wear her silky panties one time and I really dug it, so I tried masturbating in them too (with her permission obviously). 10/10, would recommend that orgasm."
"I typically watch porn of some sort from one of those well-known tube sites. I usually draw it out for quite awhile. And when I cum, I will often time it along with the money shot in whatever scene I am watching."
"I sit in a kneeling position in front of my laptop and just stroke my dick and I often will fantasize that I'm in the porn. Sometimes I'll thrust to mimic the movements of having sex."
"When I'm really treating myself, I lather myself down in oil all over, smoke a bowl, and go to town with some lube."
"I am a big fan of the balls. I always give them a lot of attention first — cupping them, tugging them, rolling them around in my palm."
"I usually use just my thumb, index, and middle finger to jerk off, but will alternate full fist as well. They're pretty different sensations and switching it up helps."
"I've always liked a good lube better than lotion or Vaseline. I mean, it exists for a reason. My favorite is Boy Butter. Little squirt of that and I go to town."
"I sit on my left had while I watch porn. It quickly falls asleep. As I am right handed, once you've successfully made the left hand fall asleep, you get to business. The numbness makes it feel like someone else is doing the wanking! Good times."
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As a girl, I don't know why I'm here. I also don't know why I read this from beginning to end.
I'm a straight girl and ughh this made me horny reading this.
I have a vagina and I'm a virgin but I still read this but whatever. A+ for the Dean gif
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Porno para todos, en este programa encontrarás audios de contenido altamente sexual, escucharas a mujeres solas y parejas manteniendo relaciones sexuales. Porno for everyone, in this program you will find highly sexual content audios, you will listen to single women and couples having sex.
Three nerds discussing tech, Apple, programming, and loosely related matters.
A podcast all about Japanese cartoons and comics as discussed by three self-proclaimed experts in the world of anime and manga! Plus anime news / reviews, coverage of classic anime, hentai / yaoi, and much, much more. Updated every week. We hope.
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Pre-show: Join us in our Clubhouse! (That’s a joke; not happening. —Ed.) Chatroulette Party line Newton’s cradle Should Apple remove the Contacts framework? Follow-up: Living outside the east coast… or America. The UK explained The Concert for Charlottesville was posted Should timers sync? (via Richard Harris) What can Mobile Device Management real…
Pre-show: RIP, Call Recorder On re-installing or transferring macOS Launch Control launchd Pixelmator Pro If we had to leave the eastern seaboard, where would we move? Follow-up: DTKs are worth more now! iOS 14.5 Watch unlock Trying to ls ~/.Trash (via Mike Vosseller) SSD traffic Two month old SSD smartmontools smartctl --all /dev/disk0 Casey’s com…
Pre-show: Strong corporate affinities Neutral #12: Vomit Ruins Everything — Marco & Casey’s BMW European Delivery experience Neutral Special: Please Lose Control of Your Car Now — Marco, Casey, and Underscore’s BMW Driving School experience Follow-up: Tesla Model S/X round steering wheel Touch controlls are force-touch? Elon says “no more stalks” N…
It's our Sweet Sixteenth year of podcasting! To celebrate, Daryl decides we need more Ken Ishikawa so we review 1989's Kyomu Senshi Miroku. But we think it's probably Kyomu Senki Miroku? Whatever, you'll surely be hearing about this from the YouTubers soon enough. Visit www.animeworldorder.com for full show notes and supplemental links.…
It’s our Sweet Sixteenth year of podcasting! To celebrate, Daryl decides we need more Ken Ishikawa so we review 1989’s Kyomu Senshi Miroku. But we think it’s probably Kyomu Senki Miroku? Whatever, you’ll surely be hearing about this from the YouTubers soon enough. Introduction (0:00 – 30:21) We kick off year sixteen of AWO by catching up on what we…
Follow-up: Marco’s new computer (This is not a joke. —Ed) T568A vs. T568B myths busted Reminiscing about the PowerBook G4’s ethernet port (via Travis Pouarz) The 30” Apple Cinema Display and print design (via Ted Barnes) Audio accommodations (via Christpher Klein) Mimi (App Store link) Dan Riccio goes into a bunker Creative Selection More Mac lapto…
Pre-show: John’s pecking order Follow-up: Curved screens to solve off-axis viewing (via Nathaniel Cohen) AirPods Max headband removal Quinn’s video Blind men and an elephant Waterfield Designs AirPods Max Case Brighter whites OxiClean /System/Applications/Utilities/Digital Color Meter Wiring Gigabit Ethernet T-568A vs. T-568B RJ11 vs. RJ45 PhoneNet…
Follow-up: Casey makes John reminisce about Atlanta[’s food] Waffle House Taco Bell CocoaLove Steak ‘n Shake Denny’s Perkins Follow-up: “Is it bigger than a breadbox?” The Feedback app will automatically run a sysdiagnose John’s bug (as mentioned on Twitter): FB8711530 Casey’s bugs are still broken, even though Apple tried to 🤬 close them FB8893003…
Follow-up: Accommodating hearing loss (via “Phredd Phlinstone”) Settings → Accessibility → Audio/Visual → Headphone Accommodations → Audiogram Example app fromMaciej Big Sur Update Apple guidance on SMC reset via Tom Bridge How to do a SMC reset Apple T2 BridgeOS Nintendo Famicom had a microphone built into the second controller Video of Pols Voice…
Follow-up: Casey’s MMS problems and Apple’s bug-reporting black hole (FB8893003, FB8952395) sysdiagnose Settings → Privacy → Analytics & Improvements → Analytics Data More on Fitness+ HDR photos Settings → Photos → View Full HDR Screen brightness iPhone 12: 625 nits typically / 1200 nits max iPhone 12 Pro: 800 / 1200 displaymate.com indicates 825 n…
Pre-show: Living the M1 lifestyle Follow-up: AirPods Max Battery situation (via Barney) Snazzy Labs video Smart Case ∆s 9to5mac Apple Support Turns out, like the Pro Display XDR, the LG UltraFine 5K does have a fan. (via Joseph Duffy) Also, it has been revised in the past. Tinus’s tweet Chrome bug report and comments Jonathan Dietz continues to sch…
Follow-up: Group MMS issues persist, and Casey is over. it. (FB8893003) AirPods Max and its competitors Beoplay H95 Marco’s Closed Headphones Mega-Review AirPods Max button and varying modes Passive (powerLiss operation) Marco’s Computing Situation LG UltraFine 5K Marc Edwards on External Displays CalDigit Thunderbolt Dock Pro Display XDR Marco’s A…
At long last, it is finished. The words of triumph may be spoken now. The debt is paid in full, for the 2010s Decade in Review COMES TO A CONCLUSION~! as we talk about the notable titles of 2019...that we managed to see, anyway, because truth be told we still haven't seen a lot of the shows we wanted to from last year. NEVERTHELESS. Visit www.anime…
At long last, it is finished. The words of triumph may be spoken now. The debt is paid in full, for the 2010s Decade in Review COMES TO A CONCLUSION~! as we talk about the notable titles of 2019…that we managed to see, anyway, because truth be told we still haven’t seen a lot of the shows we wanted to from last year. NEVERTHELESS. Introduction (0:0…
Pre-show: Casey’s great news! Mix Pre3-ii Call Recorder for Skype Audio Hijack IRC Marco’s Slightly Unpopular Opinion RealPlayer Marco’s new “experience” Follow-up: Is Apple-Silicon-Ready? brew and Rosetta Duplicating Terminal.app brew using arch Chiplets & Multi-chip Modules (via Adrian Sampson) Multi-Chip Module High Bandwidth Memory Extracting i…
Pre-show: You heard it here first: Marco is really starting to justify a new Mac. Follow-up: You can restore stuff from iCloud here (via Ryan Fegley) Accelerated TensorFlow for macOS probably just uses the GPU Neural Engine can be used as well, though. (via @hishnash) Apple did make an ECC RAM controller in the past (via Max Lein) Lots of info abou…
Follow-up: Fast resolution switching on M1 Macs Apple engineer weighs in Demo video What about external monitors? Mac-optimized TensorFlow 2.4 fork makes things fly M1 Mac 8K render test Running iOS apps with IPAs iOS App Store Package CrossOver runs Windows apps/games on M1 Macs — including 32-bit games! Cult of Mac coverage WINE VMWare Fusion Par…
It's the 7th annual trivia episode! For this edition we're joined by Ryan aka BlacOtaku1 on Twitter and OldtypeNewtype on Tumblr. How infuriating will the categories be this year? ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT. Visit www.animeworldorder.com for full show notes and supplemental links.By Anime World Order
It’s the 7th annual trivia episode! For this edition we’re joined by Ryan aka BlacOtaku1 on Twitter and Oldtype/Newtype on Tumblr. How infuriating will the categories be this year? ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT. Introduction (0:00 – 37:09) We talk to Ryan about his interests in anime, digital archiving efforts, why you should USE YOUR DAMN STICKERS ALRE…
Pre-show: Why are we recording early? Follow-up: Casey’s watch band youtube-dl is back on Github Github works with ICE, which is gross and should stop Feel free to tell Github this is gross Github’s statement about youtube-dl EFF’s counterargument to the RIAA’s claim Donate to the EFF M1 chip name predictions (Overcast link) (via Cameron Deardorff)…
Pre-show: THE ATP STORE IS BACK, BABY. Until the 14th. Act now! Remember that members get 15% off! iPhone 12 Mini, Max press reviews are out Gruber’s review MKBHD’s review Nilay’s tweet Panzer on the OIS Panzer on ISO range Halide Casey had an oops Apple Event M1 Name Apple motion coprocessors BMW M1 BMW 1 Series M Coupé System on a Chip [Soc] Unif…
The ATP Store is back until 14 November! Follow-up: Casey is aware of the National Radio Quiet Zone Verizon map AT&T map Apple leather case covers the bottom, which chaps John’s bottom Moving 2-Factor Authentication to new phones Google Authenticator’s changes (via Michael Koziarski) Reminders and Big Sur “Alexa” and “Siri” and using new hail words…
Pre-show: Please, please, please vote. The ATP Store returns on 1 November until 14 November… in theory. Follow-up: Peter Pan: Arms akimbo 5G upload speeds Verizon’s 5G lead Photos-related updates Apple Photos file management options Image Capture can import HEIC files if you change a setting on your phone: Settings → Photos → Transfer to Mac or PC…
We may be losing our grasp on the passage of time, but it's still almost the end of 2020 and we never finished our 2010s Decade In Review. We'd better get 2018 out of the way RIGHT NOW. Visit www.animeworldorder.com for full show notes and supplemental links.By Anime World Order
Pre-show: Dreaming in code Grand refactorings HomePod, HomePod Mini, and Sonos One (oh my!) Follow-up: Apple’s Magnetic Connectors Patent Accessory Design Guidelines for Apple Devices (PDF) (via Michael Bettiol) Periscope lenses don’t have moving elements (via Timo Grün) iPhone 12 Pricing T-Mobile joins the $30 off club Chargers & earphones & old p…
Apple Event overview Have you heard the good word about Verizon’s 5G? MVNO HomePod Mini Apple S5 Echo Dot ($50) Echo ($100) Echo Studio ($150) No, but really. Have you heard the good word about Verizon’s 5G? MMX iPhone 12 and 12 Mini Steve Troughton-Smith on resolutions A14 iPhone 12 Pro LiDAR ProRAW Size differences Grab Bag “Environmental” change…
Pre-show: Marco’s terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week. Follow-up: Facebook vs. Apple Apple is not taking the 30% cut after all Merchants have been allowed to add surcharges for credit card transactions since January 2013 (via Jordan Ryan Moore) Adam’s watch battery update Cell tower “trees” (via Nathaniel) Examples “Monopalms” eFUSE Baby Mon…
Thank you for all your donations to St. Jude! 💙 Pre-show: Desk Reconstruction Day Uplift Desk V2 C-frame with magnetic cable channel and mountable surge strip Follow-up: John’s Headphone Update Correct pad replacements EDT 1770D Sony’s digital vs. plastic-disc profits Apple now allows returning only Watch bands Google’s Carbon-Free Plans Unity’s IP…
You asked for this. Literally. Thanks to Patreon support, we have brought The Internet's Mike Toole on to discuss the theatrical film Mobile Suit Gundam Narrative, whose US Blu-Ray release is now but mere days away. Oh boy. It's one of THOSE episodes. Visit www.animeworldorder.com for full show notes and supplemental links.…
You asked for this. Literally. Thanks to Patreon support, we have brought The Internet’s Mike Toole on to discuss the theatrical film Mobile Suit Gundam Narrative, whose US Blu-Ray release is now but mere days away. Oh boy. It’s one of THOSE episodes. Introduction (0:00 – 25:22) We catch up with what Mike’s been up to since his last appearance, suc…
Please join ATP in donating to St. Jude Podcastathon 2020 Video Casey’s appearance Siracusa’s appearance Pre-show: Beyerdynamic DT 770 Pro, 250Ω Light color temperatures LED corn bulb The Stalman Podcast #95: Time Flies Apple Event Video Casey’s electric meter lamp Follow-up: PlayStation 5 Digital Edition pricing John’s savior Xbox One X sales up 7…
In what Gerald describes as possibly the greatest episode of AWO ever recorded, we review the 2018 Netflix anime adaptation of Baki. We thought we'd have the Gundam NT episode out before this, but we're doing that...SOON. Visit www.animeworldorder.com for full show notes and supplemental links.By Anime World Order
Please join ATP in donating to St. Jude Pre-show: Sleepy Shirts Headphone cups Sony MDR-7506 John’s new pads Beyerdynamic DT 770 Pro, 250-ohm Beyerdynamic EDT 1770D pads Follow-up: PlayStation 5 pricing and availability PlayStation 5 sizes Apple Event: Time Flies Apple Watch Series 6 U1 & Ultra-wideband Measuring Your Blood Oxygen Technology Connec…
Please join ATP in donating to St. Jude Pre-show: A heartfelt “thank you” from Casey Sand running Sorry, California Follow-up: GUI method for deleting APFS snapshots Boot Camp Assistant tmutil listlocalsnapshots / Carbon Copy Cloner Xbox Elite Series 2 trigger adjustment PS4 back-button attachment Deer apparently are “opportunistic omnivores” (via …
Please join us in donating to St. Jude Follow-up: John’s Mac Pro Reviving a data-only volume bridgeOS updates Other Mac Pro Woes John Sandilands Paul Colton Job Non-Mac-Pro Woes Hagen Terschüren Leeward Roland Månsson on Mac hardware tests ⌥D and then ⌘E Apple support article SilentKnight /usr/libexec/remotectl dumpstate (via Paul Galow) Recycling …
Black. Lives. Matter. Follow-up: Bump starts and heel/toe Design resources for developers /r/UI_Design Refactoring UI Fortnite/Epic “Seasons”, and Chapter 2 Season 4 Tim Sweeney’s tweet Cross-play won’t work anymore (via The Verge) Corporate Relationship Management Microsoft on Cross-Play Sony on Cross-Play Microsoft weighs in Judge’s ruling Sarah …
Pre-show: Marco spends Casey’s money Marco’s headphones Marco’s flashlight Video review by “SensiblePrepper” Follow-up: John’s 🦗s Apple’s fall-event-dates rumor is already wrong Correction about Siracusa’s “Aristotle” quote (Twitter thread) Apology 30b 2-4 interpretation Big Sur touch screen gestures on Lenovo X250 Big Sur menu bar icon spacing Joh…
Follow-up: Tim Cook does play both sides of the campaign-donation game Big Sur Beta 4 tweaks “Wallpaper Tinting in Windows” Energy Saver Slider Single-shot Disabling
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