Jealousy Makes You Nasty
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Jealousy Makes You Nasty
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Table of contents Last updated Oct 19, 2021
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Part of HuffPost News. ©2022 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved.
Perhaps, jealousy is not as much about nursing ill feelings for your perception of someone else's "easier gains" than it is a message from you, to you.
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It's hot and uncomfortable and you force a smile over it in the hopes that no-one notices. You offer pleasantries, through your teeth, and hatch an escape plan so that you can rush home to bond with the Green-Eyed Monster that has suddenly, become your best friend.
It's jealousy and it turns you into a version of yourself that you just cannot understand. Pitiful, woeful, bitter and cynical.
Jealousy makes you nasty...or does it?
Perhaps, jealousy is not as much about nursing ill feelings for your perception of someone else's "easier gains" than it is a message from you, to you.
Maybe, jealousy is just the fastest and loudest way that your soul can reach out to you.
Let's be honest, when life is smooth sailing and everything falls into place, we hardly pay attention to it and just assume that we deserve all the fabulous and easy things that are taking place. Right?
It's only in moments when we are submerged in the darker emotions that we take a step back, look at ourselves and our lives and start questioning our situations.
So, why on earth wouldn't your soul use jealousy to get your attention?
I believe that an emotion like jealousy, can be used for the greater good and ultimately, for your advantage.
Let's just change the way we label it and of course, the way in which we deal with it.
If we see jealousy as a message from our authentic selves, we can throw ourselves into the work that is required to achieve the type of lives we want.
Have you ever been in a phase of life where you just don't have a clue what the next step is, or what you really want out of your existence? Enter jealousy...take cognisance of the events that rile jealousy up within you.
Perhaps jealousy, can become the ultimate tool you need to allocate your passion and energy into different directions - Amellia Joon
Of course, we do need to be happy for others. We must be happy for and celebrate on behalf of others. Fortunately, when we are in a space where we feel content and happy, it becomes quite a natural response for us to feel happiness on behalf of others. But, we need to reach that content and happy place first, so why not turn jealousy on its head, and use it for the greater good!
Often, our dreams turn out to look a little different than what we originally envisioned and practising gratefulness for that is part of the journey. When you choose to live from a place of hope and gratefulness, you find it a lot easier to be happy for others. You'll get there when the time is right for you and you are ready to receive it! Allow jealousy, to kick start the journey!
The next time you feel the furry fingers of the green-eyed monster reach out for you, take note of the situation and use that signal-feeling to practice discernment. Jealousy does not HAVE to make you nasty, it can make you more driven to achieve the things in life that perhaps, you did not even realise you wanted. Use it as an equalizer and a sign that you may need to change direction or further explore an aspect of your life.
Jealousy is not a pleasant feeling... You deserve better, so, don't allow it to make you nasty, use it to make you better!
Home SOCIETY Jealousy Can Make You Nasty, 7 Ways To Tell If Someone Is Jealous Of You And How To Fix It
By Aja Louther
On Oct 29, 2018
Last updated Feb 21, 2020
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“Insecure people only eclipse your sun because they’re jealous of your daylight and tired of their dark, starless nights.” ― Shannon L. Alder
Jealousy is the mindset of insuperiority, they are not content with what they have. Instead they are constantly envious of what other people have.
When someone has an envious mindset towards you it only breeds negativity and one cannot help but wonder if they are being genuine or not. It’s best to surround yourself with people who are kind and genuine but that is not always easy, especially if the people who are jealous of you are your friends. The best thing to do is to be aware and to start recognizing the tell tale signs of their jealousy. In doing that you can help them move past it and start to see life in a different manner.
It is us to you, as an aware human being to help them see that they have the capability to achieve all of the above and more.
You can tell a lot from the tone of voice people use when complimenting or praising you. You can also see it in their body language. If someone gives you false praise, find something to genuinely praise or compliment them about and be sincere when doing it. Defuse the undertone of negativity by using positivity.
Another way to tell whether someone is envious of you is when they downplay your success. They will do this by making it seem as though the only reason you actually succeeded was because it was a fluke, or you just got lucky. They hardly ever acknowledge the fact that you actually worked your butt off to get where you are. This can be really horrible and off putting but, you must never let that get you down or sim your shine. The best way to turn the situation around is to laugh it off and remain humble within your success.
Jealous people have many different ways in which they show their jealousy and one of them is by flaunting their success while you are celebrating yours. This often happens because they aren’t as successful or feel the need to be praised as well. If you get upset that only adds fuel to their already burning fire, so when this happens, you should lead by example and offer them sincere praise for their achievements and celebrate yours and theirs together.
Sometimes jealousy comes in the form of a mirror. They will start to imitate you, the way you talk, walk and sometimes even the way you dress. Getting angry or upset isn’t going to help them find their individuality, only leading by example will. When they do their own thing, or dress a bit differently to how you usually do, compliment and encourage them. Subtly let them know that they are beautiful and unique in their own way and that they need not imitate anyone or anything to be beautiful and great.
Another way to tell whether someone is jealous is by how competitive they are. They are always wanting to be the first one to get that new car, or see that new movie, or get that promotion. Often their competitiveness leads to unhealthy emotions being projected at you if you came first. They struggle with defeat and do not know how to deal with it. The best way to diffuse this type of jealousy is to make it very clear to them that you are in no way interested in competing, this will lessen the chances of them trying to one up you.
This may be done in secret but you get people out there that are so consumed by jealousy that they thrive off other peoples failures and mistakes. They love seeing you get reprimanded, or corrected at work. One must always remember, it’s how you handle the mistakes and failures in life that matters most. So handle them gracefully and try again until you succeed.
We have all experienced this type of jealousy at least once in our lives. Jealous people often make up rumours about the people they envy in order to try isolate them. The only way to deal with this kind of jealousy is to confront the person face to face. Often they lack courage and that’s why they talk behind your back instead of to your face, so your best bet is to ask them directly why and if they can please stop. Doing so is also a good way to make them rethink their actions or even completely stop.
Truth is, we are always going to come in contact with people who display traits of jealousy. It’s up to us to be aware and to help change their mindsets using positivity and sincerity.
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