Is Anal Pleasurable
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Is Anal Pleasurable
Medically Reviewed by Isabel Lowell, MD on October 20, 2021
Anal sex is the term used for any sexual activity that involves the anus. It doesn’t always include anal intercourse.
The anus is full of nerve endings, making it very sensitive, and many people find anal sex pleasurable. An estimated 90% of men who have sex with men and as many as 5% to 10% of sexually active women have anal intercourse.
As with many forms of sex, it has risks, but by planning and communicating with your partner you can reduce a lot of these risks and enjoy the intimacy.
There are other things to be aware of as well:
Use a condom to protect against the spread of infections and diseases.
Some problems need a doctor’s treatment. Talk to your health care provider if you have:
Talk to your doctor about your symptoms. They may suggest:
Treatment for problems from anal sex will depend on your symptoms and diagnosis. For pain, fissures, and hemorrhoids, your doctor may suggest:
To treat an STD, you may need antibiotics or antiviral medication, depending on your infection.
News release, International Microbicides Conference.
University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign McKinley Health Center: "Anal Sex: Questions and Answers."
News release, New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene.
University of California, Santa Barbara, SexInfo Online: "What Are the Dangers of Anal Sex?"
Columbia University's Health Q & A Internet Service, Go Ask Alice: "Pain from anal sex, and how to prevent it."
Cedars-Sinai: “Anal Fissure,” “Anal Fistula.”
Mayo Clinic: “Is colon cleansing a good way to eliminate toxins from your body?” “Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).”
CDC: “Nail Hygiene,” “Dental Dam Use,” “Anal Sex and HIV Risk,” “Genital HPV Infection -- Fact Sheet.”
Center for Community Health: “Tips for Anal Health -- Ways to Take Care of Your Bottom.”
American Journal of Gastroenterology : “Anal Intercourse and Fecal Incontinence: Evidence from the 2009-2010 National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey.”
Harvard Medical School: “Digital Rectal Exam.”
© 2005 - 2022 WebMD LLC. All rights reserved.
WebMD does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
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"It feels like my penis is being crushed into pure heaven in every direction."
Anal sex is in. To be fair, it has been for quite some time (and for queer men , it’s always been in). In fact, Marie Claire went as far to call 2014 the “ Year of the Booty , ” and in December of that year, Mic wrote a feature called: This Year Was a Game-Changer for Anal Sex — Even for the People Who Weren't Having It .
Six years later, anal is still going strong. As a sex writer, I’m constantly asked to write pieces about how to have healthier and more pleasurable anal sex .
By why is everyone talking about anal sex now? In large part, it's because a sex-positive revolution is happening, and we’re more open to exploring our sexuality and vocalizing our desires. (For the record, people were always having anal sex before it was “in”—the mainstream media simply wasn’t talking about it the same way.) Also, anal sex feels really fucking good . Plain and simple. It feels good to do things to someone else’s butt, and have someone else do things to your butt. Really, the more butts involved during sex, the better.
Don't just take my word for it. I reached out to 12 sex-positive men, asking them to describe, in detail, what anal sex feels like. Their answers make it clear that anal sex isn’t just in—it’s here to stay.
Neil, 28 : “I love anal because it feels like my dick is being crushed into pure heaven in every direction, if that makes sense.”
Joey, 29 : “In my experience, buttholes feel tighter than vaginas 99% of the time. That additional pressure of an ass’s tight grip around your dick feels like nothing else you’ve ever experienced. It’s a completely different experience from vaginal sex.”
Brad, 30: " What I like most about anal is the unleashing of sexual energy. Leaving a handprint on their ass. Having scratch marks down my back. Getting sweaty. Just the sheer primal physicality of it all.”
Stephen, 31 : "I found the best thing about sticking my dick into someone’s ass is dominance. Taking control and going as hard or soft as you want is a huge aspect to me. However, this always means taking your partner into great consideration. For example, starting slow and easy, adding in lots of foreplay , maybe dirty talk to make them feel desirable and more 'ready' to take it."
Gregory, 29 : "The feeling of someone’s ass slapping against my thighs, or their hole tightening around my dick is incredibly empowering. Watching them react when I know I'm stimulating them in a way they're enjoying is a huge ego boost because, in a sense, there’s a kind of ownership over this other person’s orgasm."
Edwin, 35 : “My favorite part of anal sex is definitely the foreplay. The sensation of a tongue hitting those spots takes the experience to a different level. It just builds onto the anticipation for receiving, and for me, that time in between is the most erotic. Once inside, it feels like every nerve ending in my body is being touched. It’s the perfect balance of pain and pleasure.”
Guillermo, 22 : “After getting into recovery, sex was something that was sort of new to me again. I felt like a born again virgin but I still knew what to do. Bottoming feels great without any inhalants, and it’s a lot more intimate.”
Bruno, 26: “Anal sex has always felt like a giant stress relief to me. I’ve often said ‘I need to get this hangover fucked out of me,’ because that’s how good anal sex feels. With the right partner, it’s a euphoric experience that can both mellow you out and put you to fucking work.”
Barret, 30: “To me, receiving anal sex feels like total vulnerability. It’s like having all your secrets laid bare in front of someone. But it’s also euphoric, and fabulous. Receiving anal sex feels like realizing the power of your queerness. It takes every unkind feeling or thought you’ve ever had about yourself, every slur anyone has ever called you, and puts a certain amount of pleasure behind the “shame” of sex. And in that moment, when you’re getting your guts rearranged, you feel sexy, and powerful and queer."
Eliot, 24: “First of all, I'm a masochist. Not that all bottoming is painful, but generally, there is some discomfort, especially at first, and especially with larger penises. But the discomfort usually goes away quickly (with enough lube ) and is replaced with this subtle feeling of being stretched or filled. And that is what I love—that pressure. It makes me hard and builds the longer and harder I bottom. The feeling eventually takes over, until it's all I can think about is that pressure against my prostate and in my penis until I orgasm."
Kiel 27: “Anal feels like both heaven and hell. It’s hard to explain why the sometimes “painful” stretch or depth is intoxicating, but the feeling of a well-lubed bare penis moving back and forth is amazing. I can feel my prostate being hit and massaged. Anal sex feels like that first glass of unsweetened iced tea on a hot summer day. It feels like the hot shower after a weekend camping trip. It’s titillating, orgasmic, and perfect.”
Kevin, 30: “Good anal sex is like eating a delicious meal that is too hot. Those first moments are filled with a slightly uncomfortable sensation mixed with bits of euphoria. During this time, you are bordering between regret, eagerness, anxiety, and pleasure. After a deep breath out and an inhale of determination, time passes and the meal cools. You then enter a state of delicious consumption, as your booty devours their penis.
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It is not normal for anal to be painful, seriously.
When it comes to anal sex, there are a LOT of myths out there. Like any other sex act, there are misconceptions everywhere, but with anal, it always seems like there’s more out there than others. Perhaps it’s due in part to the more taboo nature of anal, but it’s totally normal have a lot of questions about anal, like if anal sex hurts, if you can orgasm from anal, and of course, is everyone having anal regularly now?
To help debunk some of the myths around anal, we rounded up a bunch of experts. Namely, Tatyannah King, a sexual health and wellness blogger ; Jenni Skyler, PhD, LMFT, and CST , an AASECT certified sex therapist and sexologist for AdamEve.com ; Sarah Melancon, PhD, clinical sexologist and expert for sextoycollective.com ; expert anal surgeon Evan Goldstein, DO , of Bespoke Surgical ; LGBT sex expert Kryss Shane , MS, MSW, LSW, LMSW; Daire Faust of SmutGeek.com ; Kat Van Kirk, PhD , a clinical sexologist and marriage and family therapist; and board-certified ob-gyn Terri Vanderlinde , a sex counselor.
The truth: Of course, with anal, the elephant in the room is usually about poop. It makes sense to wonder about the likelihood of encountering fecal matter during anal since it is anatomically logical, but anal isn’t quite just the feeling of pooping backwards. As Tatyannah King, a sexual health and wellness blogger explains, anal sex can feel “dissimilar” upon insertion and penetration, but the more relaxed someone is during anal, the more comfortable it will feel. It’s also a good idea to get started with anal training, or having you your partner insert a finger or toy into your anus before going straight in for penetrative anal sex with a penis or larger toy.
The truth: Not true! Orgasming is much more than just being penetrated (in fact, hi, a majority of those with vaginas need external clitoral stimulation to orgasm rather than just penetration), and many pegging toys have built-in vibrators or pockets for vibrators you can use. Some pegging strap-ons are even “strapless” meaning you hold the dildo inside your vagina using your pelvic muscles (or hands!) to peg your partner. And of course, you’re also more than free to touch yourself while pegging your partner.
The truth: It's not normal for pleasurable anal sex to hurt . Nope, pain during sex shouldn’t be a factor if you’re doing it correctly, King explains. If anal is painful because there isn’t enough foreplay beforehand or you’re not lubricated enough, or you’re just diving into things too suddenly to the point of causing pain: stop. “Ultimately, sex should be pleasurable,” King adds, so focus on making it as pleasurable as possible for you instead of approaching it from a “how can this hurt the least” perspective, because when done correctly, it shouldn’t! King also suggests getting a long-lasting silicone lube (be sure it’s condom-safe or toy-safe if you’re using it with either) for anal and making sure you’re wholly turned on and your body is looking forward to the experience. Relaxed anal sphincter muscles make penetration way easier and will help alleviate any concerns about pain, King says.
The truth: “While it’s common to have some bleeding after anal sex, it’s not normal ,” King says. Yikes. The reason behind this is in part because the rectum doesn’t have the same elasticity that the vagina has, so it can be more prone to tears, explains King. Makes sense when you consider that vaginas are built to have babies pass through them whereas what normally exits your anus is uh, not baby-sized. Many anal tears can also be so small that they don’t bleed, King adds, so if you are heavily bleeding, it’s best to check in with your doctor.
The truth: Not necessarily. If you’re taking time for proper foreplay, lubing up, easing the muscles of your anal sphincter enough for pleasurable sex, and also eating a healthy amount of fiber and staying hydrated, your digestive health should keep running smoothly, King says. Making sure you’re eating enough fiber (unsexy, I know, but there’s no way around it) and drinking lotsa water to keep your bowels working correctly is one of the smartest things you can do if you want to make anal a regular activity.
The truth: There isn’t enough clear evidence from doctors and researchers that fecal incontinence is a true long-term risk of anal sex, says King. There was a 2016 study in The American Journal of Gastroenterology that examined the sexual behavior of over 4,000 adults, asking them if they had anal intercourse, and whether they had fecal incontinence. While the study found that men who had anal intercourse had a higher rate of fecal incontinence than women, however , King explains that experts have since criticized the study as it didn’t completely evaluate other possible contributing factors to incontinence. Long story short, more research is needed.
The truth: You absolutely should not use a desensitizing or numbing lube during anal. While the idea of a lube to help ease you into anal seems good at first, in reality you should never use one of these during anal, or any sex, really. Why? Pain is your body’s way of letting you know to slow your roll. If you don’t feel any discomfort during sex because your anus is numbed TF out, you may still feel discomfort later on — and worse, you won’t have the option to go back in time and slow down. Not only that, but desensitizing lubes can also potentially keep you and your partner from enjoying the pleasurable experience of anal, adds King.
The truth: Not really. Pegging can actually be an excellent option for both givers and receivers, especially if the giver doesn’t have a penis, explains Skyler. One great thing about pegging, is that since it’s done with dildos, the receiver has an option of picking exactly what material, size, shape, and functionality (vibrating or not). They can also choose to go up in size or down, depending on how their bodies respond. Pegging can also be empowering for givers, as it gives them an option to experience penetrating their partner and or more dominant pleasure, Skyler adds. And, many pegging harnesses also have special pockets for vibrators, which is also a plus.
The truth: Anal, like any other sex act, can be as intimate or non-intimate as you make it, says Skyler. “Any sex act done as a transaction with someone you don’t care much about will be empty of intimacy,” she adds. However, that also means that any sex act, including anal, “done from a heart-centered place with intention for full-body and mind connection, will feel quite intimate.” Anal is not inherently more or less intimate than other forms of sex like vaginal, oral, or anything else. It’s how you and your partner treat it and each other that informs how it is received.
The truth: “People of any gender have the physiological potential to orgasm from anal sex — giving or recieving,” explains Melancon. While some women can orgasm from anal sex alone, some orgasm when clitoral stimulation is involved. Some men can also orgasm from recieving anal penetration, such as if you’re pegging your partner, and some women can also orgasm while using a strap-on to anally penetrate their partner, Melancon adds. The great thing about anal is that it doesn’t have to be just anal. You’re also free to add other toys and sensation into the mix, like vibrating dildos , clitoral vibrators , cock rings , whatever floats your boat.
The truth: While it’s technically true, the fact of the matter is that depending on where the ejaculating partner ejaculates and how careful you both are at cleaning up, there’s still some risk involved, says Melancon. Let’s say you’re in doggy-style , and your partner ejaculates inside your anus but isn’t careful when they pull out. “It’s rare, but possible semen could leak down south toward the vagina and get inside,” says Melancon. Another good reason to always wear a condom and practice safe sex ! As another bonus, condoms make any potential clean up needed afterwards way easier as well.
The truth: Dr. Goldstein explains that stool actually hangs out higher in your body, above the anus and rectum in a section known as the sigmoid colon. In reality, if you eat healthily and get enough fiber for regular, bulky stools, this should be enough to keep the anal canal clean for play. “People tend not to believe it when we share this information, so take a toy and test the landing strip. Prove it to yourself,” he says.
The truth: “Attempting to equate gender identity with a sexual act is just totally incorrect,” explains Shane. “Although anal sex and vaginal sex both often involve insertion, a transgender woman i
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