International Sex Guide Amsterdam

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International Sex Guide Amsterdam
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Writer, Freelance journalist at Amsterdam Shallow Man
I began my expat journey when I moved to Amsterdam for a six month assignment ten years ago. No longer a hamster on the corporate wheel, I am the author of two books, The Amsterdam Confessions of a Shallow Man, and The Shallow Man Guide to Dating the Dutch. I also work as freelance journalist for a number of publications and as well as presenting a show on English Breakfast Radio.
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The sun has been shining in Amsterdam, everywhere I look I see what appears to be the new fashion trend here, micro hot pants, or as the Jamaicans call them ‘batty riders.’ Here’s a tip for my female readers. If you’re wearing a backless dress, invest in a bra with a transparent strap, a thick colored one just ruins the aesthetic appeal of such an outfit, other than that, the sight of lots of fine Dutch Antelope, wearing not much at all on these hot days, always brings a smile to the face of the Shallow Man.
The heat affects people in many ways and according to the geeks at Google, one of the most popular search queries at the moment is…… casual sex. So after lots of selfless research the Shallow Man presents the casual sex guide.
According to Wikipedia casual sex can be defined as follows.
“A casual sexual relationship, casual relationship, or casual dating, is a physical and emotional relationship between two people who may have casual sex or a near-sexual relationship without necessarily demanding or expecting the extra commitments of a more formal romantic relationship.”
Below is a guide to some of the people that are not averse to encounters of the casual kind.
Miss friends with benefits has incredibly high standards for the type of man that she wishes to spend the rest of her life with. A guy with a normal job just isn’t good enough, she’s holding out for the type of man who only exists in the pages of Privé. So until Mr Right comes along (never), she only has friends with benefits, men who she doesn’t particularly want to be seen in public with, but who she’ll allow to visit her at home, in the early hours of the morning for ear bleedingly loud rampant sex.
He’s terrified of commitment. He had a serious relationship once, but this reduced the time he had available to use his gaming console and go out with his friends. He’d sooner be independent. So on a regular basis he finds himself servicing Miss Friends with Benefits, whom he regards as being a bit like his local Thai restaurant, convenient, a bit spicy and worth visiting two or three times a month. He’s sure he’ll have a serious relationship one day (he won’t), but until then is happy the way he is. (He keeps telling himself).
Miss Tinder loves flirting, is spontaneous and is looking for a bit of fun. Which is why when the mood takes her (and she’s had one or three drinks too many) she finds herself vigorously doing creative things to the tinder date of the moment. Her only complaint is that all of the men she meets start off being nice when texting, but when they meet in person, they just want sex. Curiously enough she ends up not dating them for long as she doesn’t want to be in a relationship with someone like herself. She’s not in the least a bit confused.
So many choices but I don’t want a man that wants the same as me
Mr Tinder can’t believe his luck. There are so many women on Tinder getting in touch with him that he finds it difficult to keep track of who he should be dating from one day to the next. He was never religious before but now finds himself regularly praising the lord for Tinder.
He tried online dating but there was far too much competition from other men on the sites. Getting a date could take weeks of pretending to like cats/dogs/hamsters and museums. It was painstaking and slow going. Since he discovered Tinder he’s been making out like a pickpocket at Amsterdam Gay Pride. His only complaint is that he’s tired, so tired.
One part of this couple is extremely highly sexed, the other partner also has a healthy sex drive, but is somewhat passive. He or she has allowed their partner to talk them into visiting a swinger club and – once there – found that they quite enjoyed it. Once in awhile they go to such clubs or special private parties and indulge in casual copulation with complete strangers. (Warning: The Shallow Man has been told that the majority of people at such clubs are of the calibre that you want to ask them to put their clothes back on.)
Not to be confused with Ms Swinger Club, a single lady that loves living life to the full, who has gone along out of complete curiosity and enjoyed it. Or Mr Swinger Club, a man whose personality acts as a natural contraceptive and whose only hope of having sex is to go to a swinger club and hope that some female will take pity on him. Mr Swinger Club is a multitasker as he is also known as……
This is a man who is happy to be living in Amsterdam, where there are numerous red light districts throughout the city. The hoerenloper, comes in many forms. Sometimes he’s in a serious relationship and is bored and looking for excitement. Although why having sex with a woman that does this for a living is deemed to be exciting is a bit of a mystery. He’s often also a man that can’t even get a match on Tinder so makes use of the oldest service industry in existence, or he’s just plain lazy, and likes the convenience of an emotionless fumble in a rancid smelling room. Can be seen walking away from such places at speed with his head held down and avoiding eye contact with any passing women parking their bikes nearby. Mr Hoerenloper sleeps very well at night. The fact that the fornication he pays for might have been provided by some desperate girl, smuggled into Amsterdam and intimidated to hand over every cent she earns, doesn’t even cross his mind, it’s just business.
Considers himself a distant relative of Mr Hoerenloper, when in fact they are brothers. Mr Happy Ending only goes to “massage salons” not brothels or red light windows. He pays for a massage with a little “relief” at the end because he’s too lazy to do it himself. Years of such behavior has made him a selfish lover who regards five minutes as being a marathon session. If you’re ever invited by a man to a lotion party, respectfully decline.
One party invite you might want to turn down
Mr and Mrs Opportunist are usually married or in serious relationships. They’d never dream of having an affair, but while in Amsterdam visiting friends, family or just there on business, will seize the opportunity for a no-strings one-off encounter. Often found in Rembrandtplein or Leidseplein or Hotel bars.
The above are but some of the character types found in this wonderful city and are all based on real people. No makers of contraceptive products were hurt during the writing of this post.
This article is previously published on Amsterdam Shallow Man .
[…] The Amsterdam Casual sex guide. After lots of selfless research the Shallow Man presents the casual sex guide. […]

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When the majority of people who’ve visited the Dutch capital are asked about the prostitution thing, they will talk about the girls behind the windows in the Amstedam Red Light District . This is obviously the most famous public scene of prostitution in the city, and probably in the world, but it’s not the only one. Prostitution is totally legal in the Netherlands, just as it is in many other European countries, and the RLD scene is only one of four ways people can acquire sexual pleasure for a price.
Sex clubs are different from live sex shows in Amsterdam
The Amsterdam XXX scene also includes live sex shows , which are where you’ll see couples having actual sex on stage, in addition to many other sexy parlor performances, most notably the banana trick.
Amsterdam also has an abundance of escort services that will send a girl (or guy) to your hotel or apartment. These services don’t have to pretend that they are merely for companionship like they do in most of the rest of the world, so at least there is no awkwardness when going this route, but they do tend to be fairly expensive since the transaction involves travel time and a bit of risk for the prostitute. You might be interested in checking out Amsterdamlogue’s 12 hottest Amsterdam escorts list.
>>more information on Amsterdam escorts

Brothels
In Amsterdam there are around 10 establishments that are locally known as privéhuizen, which means “private houses” in Dutch. These are similar to the sex clubs discussed below, with a few key differences. They tend to be located in residential neighborhoods, they don’t have public bar areas, and they are generally cheaper and more relaxed. You won’t have to worry about the taxi scam and the champagne hustle described below because the private house/brothels mainly attract more of a mellow clientele, including many locals who wouldn’t put up with the nonsense that goes along with most of the sex clubs.
As mentioned above, these places are quite similar to the private house-brothels, but they operate as nightclubs with liquor licenses and public lounge areas. Some of them are fairly small, but a couple are large and very similar to an upscale nightclub in the main area. All of them have a variety of rooms where you and the girl of your choice will have plenty of privacy. Some of the rooms are elaborate with Jacuzzi tubs and other fantasy elements, while others are basic rooms that will have a bath or shower attached.
Once you arrive (we’ll discuss that a bit more below) you might be asked an admission charge, or maybe not, depending on the place. You’ll go in to a bar area where you’ll be mingling with a mix of other customers and prostitutes. You can scan the room looking for someone who you’d like to spend time with, but there isn’t a rush once you are inside, and girls will be coming and going so if you don’t see someone right away you might wait around.
When you find a girl who you like she’ll usually be very friendly with you if she senses it. The drinks you are buying yourself are expensive enough, but she’ll generally request that you buy her a drink while you chat. This will be discussed more below regarding the “champagne hustle.”
Once you’ve confirmed your choice you’ll go with the girl to a private room where you’ll have an hour total to spend with her, which includes the time you’ll spend undressing and dressing again. You’ll usually start with a shower or bath and then a full body massage, but at this point things can go in a few different directions depending on you and the girl. It’s best to discuss anything special you’d like before you get to the room because many of the prostitutes won’t perform certain things, at least for the standard fee.
The prices between these places can vary wildly, but generally the nicer places with the better girls will charge more, so you kind of get what you pay for. There will usually be a standard hourly fee set for any girl in the place, but that fee can vary depending on the time of the day and the day of the week. The cheapest of the sex clubs is Jan Bik, and they charge €75 per hour for your time with a girl, all-inclusive, but most others start around €150 per hour on up to about €300. Again, it depends on the time of day and day of the week. A few places have a lower set rate before 7 p.m. This fee for time with the girl does not include an admission charge if there is one, or drinks in the club, which can really get out of hand.
This is hardly unique to Amsterdam, and in fact a variation of it takes place at adult businesses around the world. If you ask a taxi driver in Amsterdam to take you to a sex club, they’ll be thrilled to take you to the place that gives them the highest commission, regardless of anything else you might have asked about or suggested. You’ll of course have to pay the meter and a tip, and the driver will also get a commission of around €75 from the club for bringing you.
This sounds very nice of the sex club to do, but of course it’s you who ends up paying that entire commission as part of your tab either on your way in or on your way out. No one is likely to mention to you that your bill or admission was padded by €75 that goes to the taxi driver, but rest assured that you’ll pay it if you arrive by cab.
Most of the sex clubs will offer you free transportation on their websites, but of course this adds up to the exact same thing. You’ll pay a fortune for this “free ride” so the best way to get to one of these clubs is walking, or by public transportation, or if you do take a taxi just get an address of a restaurant or building nearby and then get out of the taxi and wait until they leave before you make a move to the club. You’ll have to be a bit discrete with this since this is a huge moneymaker for the taxi drivers and they’ll certainly figure things out if a single man asks to be taken from near a hotel to 50 meters from one of the sex clubs the taxi driver is only too familiar with.
Again, this is common around the world, so you can’t blame it on Amsterdam, although you can go to one of the private-house brothels if you want to avoid it. Once inside one of these clubs the entire staff will do everything in their power to encourage you to buy expensive champagne to share with the girl of your choice. These bottles of champagne can cost up to €500, and they usually start around €100 at the very minimum for a small bottle.
Since the girls typically get a bit less than half the hourly fee for their services, they work hard to sell champagne out front because they receive a hefty commission for every bottle sold. Some of the girls will even tell you that they can’t go into a private room until you’ve bought at least one bottle of champagne, and they aren’t kidding. Not every sex club is as aggressive as others about this, but prepare for this part of the experience when you are considering how much this experience is going to cost you.
Below you’ll see a list of most of the popular sex clubs, and below this you’ll see an interactive map so you can see where each one is located in relation to the city center.
Club Elegance
Nicolaas Witsenkade 38
1017 ZT Amsterdam
Phone: 020- 627-9788
Official Club Elegance site
Since Yab Yum was closed down by the city in early 2008 , this is now considered the nicest and classiest of the sex clubs. There’s usually a €75 admission charge at the door, which includes 5 drinks. They are quite close to the Heineken Brewery and also to Societé Anonyme, so many people will be able to walk here and avoid the taxi scam. Their website is an odd mix of Dutch text and English labels, and translating it in Babel Fish only helps a bit.
Club LV
Middenweg 144
1097 Amsterdam
Phone: 020-663-6662
Open 8pm to 5am every day
Official Club LV site
Details on this place are hard to come by. This place is several kilometers southeast of Centraal Station in a very non-touristy neighborhood. Their website is one of those really annoying Flash sites developed around 2002, and while it looks professional it doesn’t give much away so it’s hard to tell if the actual girls look anything like the models in the staged photos on the site.
Club Mayfair
Roompotstraat 1
1078 Amsterdam
Phone: 020-676-2420
Monday-Friday 3pm to 5am
Saturdays 8pm to 5am
Sundays – closed
Official Club Mayfair site
This place is about 1.5 kilometers south of Museumplein and Leidseplein , and it’s only a couple blocks from the RAI convention center complex. Their website is in Dutch, but is easy enough to figure out anyway.
Golden Key
Overtoom 294
1054 Amsterdam
Phone: 020-612-4078
Open 8pm to 4am daily, except from 9pm Sundays
Official Golden Key site
This place says their girls work independently and set their own rates and services. Past visitors have given the Golden Key fairly low marks on the quality of the girls. The location is not far from the city center, and their website is in English, although with very little information.
Jan Bik
Buitenwieringenstraat 3-5
1013 GH Amsterdam
Tel. 020-6222785
Open noon to 6am every day
Official Jan Bik site
This place is well known as the cheapest sex club in Amsterdam, and they have 7 other locations throughout the Netherlands so perhaps their business efficiency allows them to pass savings on to the customers? A 30-minute session goes for €50 and a 60-minute session goes for €75 according the modest page on their website that is dedicated to the Amsterdam location. Past visitors usually report the quality of the girls reflects the low prices, so don’t expect Julia Roberts here. The place is also the closest to Centraal Station, and should be walking distance for most tourists, but they evidently don’t do the taxi scam here anyway. Jan Bik is also listed among the Amsterdam private-house brothels because they also offer private, discreet service for those who’d rather not mingle in the bar area with other customers and the girls on offer.
Ria’s
Overtoom 558
1054 Amsterdam
Phone 020-616-0314
Open 11am to 4am daily
Official Ria’s site
This place is just down the street from the Golden Key, and it’s close to Vondelpark , and Leidseplein as well. Their website is one of those really annoying all-Flash sites, and while the images and artwork are nice, they really don’t help you get a sense of the place.
Societé Anonyme
Stadhouderskade 64
Phone: 020-662-4952
Open 8pm to 4am daily
Official Societé Anonyme site
This one is located between the Rijksmuseum and the Heineken Brewery, so it’s a close walk from Leidseplein as well. They promise the utmost in discretion and anonymity, and they are one of a few sex clubs that also runs an outcall escort service with the same girls. They show photos of actual girls on their site, which is rare among sex clubs.
All of the above is meant to be a starting guide so you understand generally how things work, but if you have more questions you are in luck since you can check out the excellent Amsterdam message boards at ignatzmice.com. Regulars help newcomers by answering specific questions about how everything works, and be sure to read the in-depth Trip Reports for the most current experiences and advice.
Now that you know you are definitely coming:
Below is an interactive Google map of the sex clubs. Click on the blue marker to see which club is points to. For a labeled map of the city see the main Amsterdam map page.
Return to the Amsterdamlogue home page to see the latest Amsterdam articles

Want to know more about sex in Amsterdam ?
There are few places in the world that have such famous red light areas as Amsterdam and the city has a long association with tolerance and liberal mindedness.
In our essential guide to the Amsterdam Red Light District , we take a look at the history of the red light area, the legalisation of prostitution windows, and some of the highlights that the city has to offer: from sex theaters and live sex shows, to Amsterdam escort services and erotic massage parlours, to the strip clubs that pull in tourists throughout the year…
The main red light district in Amsterdam is known as De Wallen or, simply, ‘The Wall’ and has been a major part of the city centre make up since as far back as the early 13 th century.
This nickname refers to the fact that the original site of Amsterdam was fortified by large earth walls.
As the city has grown, the original site continued to be referred to as The Wall and, because of the links with prostitution, the phrase has become a euphemism when paying for sex.
Sprawling out from the original location of the docks, De Wallen is a network of
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