I Hate Bdsm
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I Hate Bdsm
BDSM is sick, disgusting and I am disturbed by people who engage in it
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I know, "It is fine because it is between consenting adults" and " People are into different things. Does not mean you have to like it."
But that does not mean I cannot express my opinions on it.
I think people who participate in it are sick. I don't care if you like being submissive or dominate. That is one thing. But burning, cutting, heavily bruising, causing actual harm to your SO? What normal person wants their SO to be covered in bruises, cuts, scratches, burns, etc? It is one thing to have some pretty rough sex so naturally you have a few marks but another thing to look like you were attacked on the street.
And things like "pet play" and "slave training" are fucked up and I dont even have to explain why. You need serious help if you enjoy degrading yourself or someone else like that. Obviously, people can do what they please but I refuse to accept this behaviour as "normal" and the people who do stuff like this don't have serious issues.
Edit: Why is there so much debate over my opinion? You guys are acting like you did not even read what I put. I do not care if consenting adults engage in these activities or not. I also know the different reasons people do bdsm and why they find it appealing. But I still have these views because that is my opinion of it. Plain amd simple. Im not preventing anyone from doing these activities for thinking this.
How is Bible Discussion/Study Meeting sick and disgusting?
I know. Read the first two lines of my post.
Watching the movie Nymphomaniac really made me question why stuff like BDSM exists.
I'm sorta into BDSM, and I understand a lot of what you're saying. Theres plenty of stuff I find disturbing and gross in the community. But BDSM in of itself is very diverse.
Really all it is a general type of dynamic. Sub and dom. It can be pretty vanilla like rough sex, light spanking and dirty talk to full on scat age play.
BDSM always starts by exploring that simple dynamic and because of this, many many fetishes have spawned from it. Slaves, pets, littles, cucks, looners, brats, daddys and mummys etc. So yes, I completely understand peoples aversion to it.
But I don't think that anyone should be shamed for their sexual desires (unless they are illegal/cause serious harm ofc).
I find that for me, BDSM has made me trust my partner more. As a sub, I put myself in a very vulnerable position. And to have that be such a rewarding experience is very fufilling.
I have been a bdsm fan my whole life, I prefer tickling to anything else, especially watching 2 women tickle eachother, it is probably weird in most peoples opinion but I'm sick of people demonizing bdsm as if its a bad thing. It helps my mind and it hurts no one and tbh I don't think women dislike being tickled anyway, its a scientific fact that women are less ticklish, they just fake reactions and I'm fully aware of this as a male. If they want to tickle each other for cash I'm willing to pay them for it, helps them and me at the same time, where is the harm? If anything it's easy money for them and I'm okay with that because its worth the money for me. I'm a freak and I'm proud of it, because at least I'm honest and at least I understand reality and at least I'm not abusing anyone.
I'll say it. I agree with you. I was involved in BDSM for about 13 years. Its a never ending downward spiral of looking and desiring while never actually participating in anything other than grown adults covered in their own waste. Of course the scenes aren't the same everywhere but this completely eliminated any desire of kink. Sure I'll spank my significant other from time to time but as for any "kinks" my interest has long sailed.
1- bdsm is not necessarily about burning or electrocuting or bruising .... it can be just about commanding and obedience
2- military recruits are slaves themselves to commanding officers in the majority of world's armies, yet nobody is calling them sick
3- i know its hard to accept, but some (or many people) just love being slaves 24\7, they can perform better in life when they follow someone else's commands than when they make their own decisions, and doms get more confidence when they know they build and help subs to boost their performance by taking away their stress and trust me, bdsm is a big stress relief for subs
4- just like you, i used to feel creeped out by the BDSM, but ended up practicing it after i learned that it is has a much wider range than just black masks and torture
Ok. I guess bdsm isnt inherently sick. What I shouldve put was extreme bdsm because I will always hold this opinion to that type of stuff.
I think people who participate in it are sick. I don't care if you like being submissive or dominate. That is one thing. But burning, cutting, heavily bruising, causing actual harm to your SO? What normal person wants their SO to be covered in bruises, cuts, scratches, burns, etc? It is one thing to have some pretty rough sex so naturally you have a few marks but another thing to look like you were attacked on the street.
It's totally understandable to find that unappealing. It's fairly extreme.
And things like "pet play" and "slave training" are fucked up and I dont even have to explain why. You need serious help if you enjoy degrading yourself or someone else like that. Obviously, people can do what they please but I refuse to accept this behaviour as "normal" and the people who do stuff like this don't have serious issues.
Sure, it's weird but I'm not aware of any research showing that they're more likely to have psychological issues.
Why do you care what people do behind closed doors? If you aren't into something then you won't understand the appeal.
Did you read the post? I said if they want to do it, ok. But I think it is fucked up. If someone says at home all day, skinning themselves because they like the look of themselves with no skin, am I allowed to think that person is mentally disturbed? Even if he does it behind close doors?
Honestly i hate close minded people like you,who go around try to polish others peoples opinions,just because they think that they have a moral high ground....why the fuck do you care if he believes that?is he hurting anybody?is he imposing his opinions on others?no,so in the end what he believes its non of your fucking business...
Living in a civilized society means that others are going to have different opinions that you don't like and they have every right to express them,you don't have to accept them but you have to respect them...well as long its not something homophobic,racist,sexist or bigoted,what other people believe and how they chose to express it,its non of your fucking business.
Fyi i don't agree with op's opinion,but i am not going to shame him,because he has a different opinion than me.
You're describing an incredible minority of the BDSM scene. I know since I've been deep in it for over ten years. I host a dungeon night at my house once every three months. Burning is incredibly rare, heavy bruising is debatable, and actual harm is relative. Cuts, eh, if it's your bag, it's your bag, there are too many health issues involved in cutting for my tastes.
And most people don't look like they were attacked on the street. Most people don't leave facial bruises or marks. Anything over the neckline is rare. We have normal jobs and lives for the most part and respect that. My submissive flipped the scrip today and left some bite marks on my shoulders and back (it's a woman, she got overly excited after giving me a rim job).
Pet play is just weird, and that's it. At worst it's cute. When I've had cat-girls, they just like to get pet, walk on all fours, have some cats ears and a butt plug tail. There's maybe some limb binding but that's incredibly rare. If it goes on for more than a couple of hours, it's really unusual. "Slave Training" is more present in the Domme/Submissive male realm. And I'll give you that submissive males are defective bitch fags. Cuck scum not worth respecting. Best to just castrate them, and pimp them out on the street corner till they die of AIDS, like what Democrats deserve.
Most of what I do is just deliver incredible sex, some orgasm conditioning, and other things of that nature. My most fucked up stuff is just fucking a woman through over a hundred orgasms, then using my four wire TENS unit on her and shocking her so she orgasms from the pain after I have conditioned and trained her into being a good little pain slut that orgasms from the infliction of pain.
It's ok to be ignorant, just don't be a whiny bitch about it. Ok?
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We all harbor secrets. Some are big and bad; some are small and trivial. Researchers have parsed which truths to tell and which not to.
Posted April 15, 2009
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Reviewed by Jessica Schrader
Sadomasochism can be considered a type of sexual play, preference, or identity where an individual derives satisfaction from receiving pain, inflicting pain, or both. Often called "S&M," sadomasochism is part of a large category of consensual sex practices and lifestyles called BDSM . BDSM is an acronym for "bondage and discipline," "dominance and submission," and "sadism and masochism."
Sadomasochism can be difficult for people to understand, and for some it can seem downright scary. For individuals who prefer a more "vanilla" sexual life with no kink, it can seem odd that there are people who want to be whipped, uncomfortably chained to a cross, caned, or otherwise tortured. Equally as disturbing can be imagining oneself being the person who enjoys doing these things to others. For many people, the practices associated with sadomasochism can bring up strong reactions, one of them commonly being, "That's dangerous!"
In an article published by ABC News last year, and in other articles from mainstream news sources over the past few years, this seems to be the reaction. The ABC article, entitled, " Love Hurts: Sadomasochism's Dangers ," discusses a 67-year old man who was rushed to the emergency room after losing consciousness in a sex club. He had passed out during an S&M scene that involved him hanging by his arms from a cross, and the damage was so severe that it took him a few days to regain consciousness. The article discusses how lucky the man is to be alive, and goes on to talk about the more unfortunate individuals who have died while engaging in S&M practices. Not surprisingly, the article's main message, as expressed by the sex experts they quote in the article, seems to be that people shouldn't get into dangerous sex.
It's true that some sex practices can be dangerous, and that people should always take precaution when experimenting with a new practice. But people can get injured or die from a variety of activities. A SCUBA diving death is not uncommon, nor is a rock climbing death. Even dying during sex isn't uncommon after a certain age. What makes BDSM injuries and deaths so newsworthy is that they occurred during alternative sex practices that are not widely well understood. The mystery surrounding these practices allows people to be easily frightened, and it can make judgment seem a little more OK.
In the ABC News article, it seems like the reaction expressed ("That's dangerous!") is thinly masking a judgment toward BDSM. If the message is really just that S&M (and hence BDSM) can be dangerous for some people at some times, then it would make sense to give tips about how to reduce the danger (other than full abstinence). For instance, the dangers associated with BDSM can be greatly reduced by consensually playing with a caring, experienced partner, using safe words , and clearly defining boundaries ahead of time. There are many safety precautions taken by those who engage in BDSM, and nearly none of that information is presented in this article, which makes individuals who are into BDSM practices appear to be universally irresponsible and negligent.
In addition, the article appears to pathologize individuals who prefer BDSM to more normative sex practices, assuming them to be incapable of love. As quoted in the article, Judy Kuriansky, a sex psychologist, says, "There is a triumvirate of guilt , embarrassment , and fear of intimacy for these people ... It's rare that all of the sudden they can give up on being interested in pain and suddenly capable of being loved." It seems that while the article started with one reaction, that BDSM is dangerous, it ends with a judgment that BDSM is a shameful, rarely curable pathology that afflicts those who cannot experience love and intimacy. By asserting that the inclusion of S&M in sex precludes a person from experiencing love, the article is endorsing the idea that there is only one way to love. However, many individuals in BDSM communities vehemently disagree, and maintain that they do love, and that BDSM allows them to do this more fully. To quote Lee, the main character in the S&M-themed movie " Secretary ": "I feel more than I've ever felt and I've found someone to feel with. To play with. To love in a way that feels right for me."
So what's dangerous about BDSM? Is BDSM dangerous because it is bad for our health, or because it is non-normative and threatening to traditional views on love? Is BDSM only for deviants who can't love, or is BDSM just a different way of loving? Before deciding, it can be useful to take a look at the other side of the issue, from the perspective of those who enjoy BDSM in their lives. A few websites that explain pro-BDSM views are below.
Jennifer Sweeton is a doctoral student at Pacific Graduate School of Psychology-Stanford University School of Medicine Consortium.
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We all harbor secrets. Some are big and bad; some are small and trivial. Researchers have parsed which truths to tell and which not to.
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Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
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