Husband Spank

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Husband Spank
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Maggie Gyllenhaal finds her inner minx in movie Secretary.
QUESTION: I recently accompanied my husband to a school reunion and, while there, I learnt that most of them had been caned occasionally. On the way home, my husband confessed that the thought of this turns him on and he persuaded me to spank him that night before we made love. I feel lucky to still have an active love life after many years of marriage and am always happy to spice things up, but in this case I don’t know what to do, as he’d like to make it a regular thing and I don’t share his impulse. How should I handle this?
ANSWER: Oh dear, I do sympathise. Understanding a sexual preference is not the same thing as sharing it. The good news, however, is that despite your differences on this occasion, it’s a tribute to your closeness as a couple that after many years of marriage your husband feels able to share his sexual quirks with you.
It’s obvious your husband isn’t a full-blown aficionado of what the French call ‘le vice Anglais’ or he’d have asked you to indulge his desires years ago. The school reunion has reawakened a teenage fantasy that probably happened at a formative age - those of a boy’s first sexual stirrings - so it’s also touching that, despite many years of marriage, your husband’s romantic imagination is firmly fixed on you and he casts you as the star of this erotic scenario.
The fact that you are even contemplating indulging him speaks volumes about your erotic generosity.
In relationships there are often some boundaries we do not feel comfortable crossing. I must admit that when an old boyfriend suggested my giving him a little light smacking once, I burst out laughing and couldn’t participate for giggling.
Having said that, I’ve met plenty of males who harbour fantasies about being dominated by a strong woman. Often these men are the boss in their professional lives, but long to cede control in their private lives. Some psychiatrists also believe that men who have had imposing but emotionally distant mothers seek to replicate that dynamic as adults.
It’s tricky for a woman to be made to play a certain role in the bedroom if that’s not her thing. It’s far more common among my female friends for a woman to express a longing for a strong, virile caveman type to make energetic, passionate love to her. If these circumstances are reversed - and I suspect that’s the problem in your scenario - it can make many women feel uncomfortable.
I have always agreed with the motto of the American sex adviser, Dan Savage, who says the most important thing in couple dynamics is that the two people involved are ‘”ood, giving and game”.
Having said that, there are limits to everyone’s reservoirs of empathy. Having to participate in anything that doesn’t rock your boat - however loving and close your relationship is and however well-meaning your husband - is as unkind as making a TV soap hater watch every single episode of Coronation Street. Sex is the most mutual of conjugal pleasures, so it should thrill both of you. - Daily Mail
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I met two Christian couples who have been married for 2 years and 6 years respectively, the wife in the two year marriage is unhappy. Both families belong to a strict Christian grouping that believes in Christian domestic discipline. In this the husband who is the head of the household is allowed to discipline his wife to correct her behaviour and remind her of the proper way a Christian woman is supposed to behave. This discipline usually takes the form of spanking the woman's bottom. The problem for the woman complaining is that her husband according to her spanks her too much and that her buttocks are almost permanently sore. The other lady ( married for 6 years) advised her to change her behaviour so that there would be no need for the husband to administer that many spankings. After some more discussion the sore bottomed woman agreed to try and amend her behaviour. Now these couples are in Nigeria and I was sad that I had not joined this Christian thing. If more Nigerian women get spanked then marriages would last longer and the partners would be happier. As an aside you can learn more about this type of strict Christianity at websites like these: http://www.christiandomesticdiscipline.com http://www.ddchristianmarriage.com http://www.christiandd.com I would appreciate your views, especially from those that actually live in Nigeria.
Hunh? spank ke? where in the Bible is it written dat husbands should spank dier wives dats abuse plain and simple IMO!!
sweeti14: Hunh? spank ke? where in the Bible is it written dat husbands should spank dier wives dats abuse plain and simple IMO!! No you are wrong, there is abundant scriptural authority for it. It just requires couples willing to live their lives according to the scriptures.
@John. Na wa for u o, and your likes. Please answer this my question: I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
LouisThoro: @John. Na wa for u o, and your likes. Please answer this my question: I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it? Your neighbor may not be a Christian, he or she may be a Muslim. You cannot force your religion on him or her. If they are of the same belief as you and accept to live by that belief, then yes, you can carry out the biblical injunction. When people accept to live by the living word of God they take the good and the bad. It is a source of annoyance to most women that God did not embrace women's liberation. You and your sisters may want to rewrite the bible.
^^^ You are re writting the bible? did u read the verse i quoted properly? Where did it talk about religion?
@OP: That was a load of crap. No has the right to put their hands on anyone unless it is in self defense.
LouisThoro: @John. Na wa for u o, and your likes. Please answer this my question: I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it? u don kill me this night. kai. My nephew lies sometimes, maybe i should burn his tongue. Abuja Social welfare teke note, i want to obey the bible all liars should have a place in burning fire, make i show am the fire from here
well, I think it depends on the nature of the spanking. . .
where in the bible does it say to spank your wife? the husband is clearly getting an unholy buzz out of the so-called spanking, imo.
LouisThoro: ^^^ You are re writting the bible? did u read the verse i quoted properly? Where did it talk about religion? Actually didn't read the verse, just answered your question. By the way what does "Na wa for u o, and your likes" mean? Inked_Nerd: @OP: That was a load of crap. No as the right to put their hands on anyone unless it is in self defense. Yes, the things of God are usually crap to the Godless chic2pimp: The story sounds fishy. You think everybody belongs to the money hungry churches we have in Nigeria?
everybody likes to interprete the bible the way it suits them just cos the hubby likes spanking bum he brings in the bible to justify his act of wickedness.thats abuse unfortunately seems the whole bunch in the church have been brainwashed if not, the wife would not be complaining of "too much spanking"but spanking fullstop.
We young women today are very headstrong and don't easily take correction. This most likely is why the husband finds he needs to spank her repeatedly. Good Christian women should respect their husbands and follow the lead taken by their husbands. There is nothing wrong with a husband spanking his wife if the aim is to correct her.
johndoe200: No you are wrong, there is abundant scriptural authority for it. It just requires couples willing to live their lives according to the scriptures. Na wah oh!! quit mis interpreting the Bible!! and please show me the " abundant scriptural authority " oh
'spank' is relative and have multiple meanings
johndoe200: In this the husband who is the head of the household is allowed to discipline his wife to correct her behavior and remind her of the proper way a Christian woman is supposed to behave. By who?
Methinks no gentleman has the right to beat a lady, and certainly no crazy man of God.
@ topic >>> SMH >>> spank ur wife >>> SMH AGAIN !!!
Yes Christans can also spank that bootay. Its not limited to p0rn videos
@OP, We xtians are allowed to give our wives, Uppercut, Clothesline, DDT, Headbutt etc
Spanking on the bom! There's nothing christian in spanking your spouse for corrections, its utterly a misnomer to the teachings of Christianity, The woman is supposed to be the man's better half, and they are supposed to work things out together, hand in hand, abi, maybe the man just like to dey tap current for im wife body
How can one post a topic on nairaland. Please.
dayokanu: Yes Christans can also spank that bootay. Its not limited to p0rn videos Yeah, they are allowed to enjoy the fun that the ass spanking brings, but i hope the man shares in the spanking too,
Christianity never thought any man to spank, touch or beat his wife. Christianity teaches love and endurance with forgiveness.
If they claim to be the devout Christians they say are, Can't they read their Bible and know that wife battery is wrong? You think Christianity na just 4 mouth, And not abiding by the principles that goes along with it, tschew! Besides to hell with your muslim doctrines.
Missy ★ B: By who? By God, this is something ordained by God. ReginaVII: We young women today are very headstrong and don't easily take correction. This most likely is why the husband finds he needs to spank her repeatedly. Good Christian women should respect their husbands and follow the lead taken by their husbands. There is nothing wrong with a husband spanking his wife if the aim is to correct her. My sister, you are the only one that understands. Women sometimes women need their buttocks beaten to bring them to their senses. sweeti14: Quote from: johndoe200 on Yesterday at 04:52:15 PM No you are wrong, there is abundant scriptural authority for it. It just requires couples willing to live their lives according to the scriptures. Na wah oh!! quit mis interpreting the Bible!! and please show me the "abundant scriptural authority" oh Shocked I have posted links in the first post, the websites provide abundant scriptural references and explanations. Take a minute to read what is written there. You will learn a lot. kokoye: 'spank' is relative and have multiple meanings Wink To spank here means to "cause pain to a person's buttocks" These are proper spankings meant to leave a lasting impression.
Fhemmmy: Christianity never thought any man to spank, touch or beat his wife. Christianity teaches love and endurance with forgiveness. +1
@OP what if the husband is the one thats wrong, what should the wife do ?, cut his head i guess, lol
fredoooooo: @OP what if the husband is the one thats wrong, what should the wife do ?, cut his head i guess, lol Why don't you read the links in the first post? You may learn something and then make intelligent posts.
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I can't get over my husband's spankings
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My husband was spanked growing up and I can't help being turned on thinking about it. He's told me a lot about it and though I know he didn't enjoy it I can't get it out of my head. When we have sex I often think of him getting it and crying or reimagining it like he described it to me.
I've tried to recreate it but he's really not into it and that's fine. I'm good just hearing him describe it to me though I know he must realize what it does to me since I always initiate sex afterward.
I'm close to his mother and we've discussed how he got it growing up. She even (playfully) suggested I do the same. A couple of times when I've seen them argue I kept quiet, hoping his mother would spank him as she used to. I know if she did I'd watch and encourage her.
I know it's awful but I can't get over the image of my husband crying from a spanking as he did as a boy.
She even (playfully) suggested I do the same. A couple of times when I've seen them argue I kept quiet, hoping his mother would spank him as she used to. I know if she did I'd watch and encourage her.
Look, this is r/Confession , every thing in here is weird, so could we please not make weird post acknowledgments or else we'd be here all year.
I...uh...I hope everything works out!
That's- strange. Not bad I suppose, though. You could try telling him about it, provided you're comfortable enough.
Sometimes people act out traumatic and humiliating things during arousal because it brings them closer to how they felt when they were abused. Like a coping mechanism. Maybe you're just into dominating him which is fine, but if he's not into it I would tone it down.
I dont think that there's anything to be ashamed of, if that's the issue here. Spanking is a normal sexual things & as long as the "child part" isn't the turn on then its normal. There are many women who blog about spanking fetishes as wwll, and maybe if you bring this up to your husband you xan find a new way to spice up tour sex life with role play.
Feel rest assured that there are much weirder fantasies out there.
You have a spanking fetish and that's not unusual or anything wrong. Unfortunately you're going to have to accept that your husband is never going to be interested in it, that it'll only ever be a fantasy. Do consider your husband's feelings in this. He may be unbothered by his childhood, or you may be asking him to recall quite bad memories.
Talk to him about it. If it involves sex, he might be open.
Maybe you would like it if he spanked you. Have you ever tried it?
As OPs fantasy is specifically about her husband getting spanked, I doubt that would do much for her.
I feel like this is an abuse trust, to a degree. It sounds like you're taking traumatic moments he felt comfortable enough to share with you and turning into some psycho-sexual power game. Maybe it's just the way you've described it, but you and your husband have some talking to do. There are deeper things at play than just sexual arousal.
I guarantee your poor unfortunate husband will be crying his eyes out before very long



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