Husband Getting Wife

Husband Getting Wife

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A happy husband, who we shall call Jake, took to Reddit to share a story that happened to him and his wife (who we shall call Suzie) a couple of years ago.
“I thought we were happy. We were your usual suburban professional couple,” he wrote. “Financially secure, healthy…two kids (14f and 9m at the time). I thought we had a healthy social life.” However, after catching Suzie cheating on him with another man, Jake meticulously planned his revenge…
The story started a few months beforehand, with Jake realizing that he was going through some sort of “rough patch” with Suzie, as many married couples do.
“Both of us were working long hours, not spending enough time together, we were going through some developmental problems with my son and tensions in the house were running a little high,” he wrote. Jake admitted that he tried to make things better, coming home earlier and being more attentive to his wife. However, it was already too late…
During this tough time in their marriage, Jake realized that Suzie was spending a lot more time “texting with her girlfriends.”
Seeing that he valued his wife maintaining close bonds with her friends, Jake didn’t think much of it at the time. He gave her the benefit of the doubt and assumed that it would help her to confide in her friends in order to get some frustrations off her chest. However, Jake soon learned who Suzie was texting when he stumbled across an old iPad…
One day, Jake was scavenging around his son’s bedroom when he found an old iPad. After charging it, Jake noticed that Suzie’s FB messenger was still logged in.
He couldn’t help but take a look at the most recent messages. “There were a lot of highly questionable messages with a guy from her hometown who I will call [JBC],” he wrote. At first, Jake tried to brush it off. However, the messages kept on coming…
Jake needed to keep an eye on any further messages. So he secretly took the iPad to work and patiently waited for the next exchange of messages between Suzie and JBC.
“My wife tore me down. Her and JBC were making fun of me,” he wrote. “All of my flaws, insecurities and secrets I entrusted to my partner were now fodder for her and JBC.” Not to mention the fact that Suzie was writing intimate messages to JBC and deleting them as she went…
Completely lost for words by what he was seeing, Jake had no idea how to confront his wife about what she was doing. Despite doing some soul-searching, Jake returned home and was clearly in a bad place.
Although Suzie asked him what was wrong, Jake simply shook it off, before going back to the iPad and watching the continuous torrent of messages. “My wife [was] completely into it, and JBC was sprinkling in “I love you’s,” he wrote.
Although Jake couldn’t believe what his wife was doing behind his back, it wasn’t until she planned to see JBC in person that this story was taken to the next level.
“I found out JBC was coming to town to spend a weekend of quality time with my wife in a pretty nice hotel,” he wrote. This begs the question: how exactly was Suzie going to get away from Jake for a whole weekend without the cat getting out of the bag?
Despite already knowing, Jake wondered how exactly his wife would try to cheat on him in secret. “The wife is buttering me up and wanting to take a spa weekend with the girls to relax and when she gets back we can really focus on our marriage,” he wrote.
Surprisingly, Jake went with the plan and even told her that it was the best idea she’s ever had. Little did she know though that Jake was already one step ahead of her…
Jake knew that he needed to think on his toes if he stood any chance of getting revenge on his cheating wife. It didn’t take long before he got in touch with a lawyer and started making plans. “I get with the lawyer and have him draft a strong separation agreement stating that she would move out,” he wrote.
“She would get weekend visitation, no child support in the interim until the divorce is final.” However, Jake was about to suffer…a lot…
Although he already knew what he was going to do during that hotel getaway, the two weeks leading up to that weekend were agonizing for Jake.
“I sit through the most agonizing two weeks of my life,” he wrote. “After all this most of my feelings for her are completely gone, and I’m just seething with anger like I’ve never felt before.” While those two weeks were emotionally exhausting for Jake, they also made things a lot clearer. Then, the big weekend finally arrived…
The big day had finally arrived for Jake to put his revenge plan fully into motion. The first thing he did was take half of his money out of all their shared accounts and opened up an account in a new bank. Then, he printed “about 75 pages of FB messenger screenshots.”
With all of the necessary measures in place, there was only one more thing he needed to do to execute the plan. His wife told him she was on her way to the “spa retreat…”
After texting her back, telling her to “have fun,” Jake arrived at the exact hotel that Suzie was staying at with JBC. He then tried calling her, only to go straight to voicemail.
“They are probably already at it, whatever,” he wrote. Then, Jake thought of a plan B to help him execute his revenge. He asked the reception to call Suzie’s room on his behalf. After ringing three times, someone finally answered. However, it wasn’t his wife…
Lo and behold, it was Suzie’s cheating buddy JBC who answered the call. Prepared for this moment, Jake simply rolled with it and asked JBC if he could send his wife down to the lobby.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about bro,” JBC nonchalantly replied. At this point, Jake returned with another offer, to call “Mrs. JBC” and bring her to the hotel! He could immediately tell that JBC was panicking and gave him five more minutes to send Suzie downstairs…
All it took was two minutes for Jake’s wife to show up at reception. She looked horrified and wasn’t able to say anything. Jake immediately took charge of the situation and sat her down in a quiet space.
After Jake calmly asked her what she was doing at the hotel, Suzie desperately tried to find an excuse and repeatedly told him that it’s not what it looks like. Nevertheless, Jake knew exactly what was happening and told her what was going to happen…
Jake explained to Suzie that he wanted her to move out immediately, or he would tell their kids, her parents, and everyone in her life what she did.
“Here is a separation agreement that I think is more than fair considering what’s going on,” he told her. “I’m going to need you to look this over, sign it, and leave it at the house when you get your stuff.” Jake even offered to show his wife the screenshots of the messages he found on the iPad…
After saying everything that needed to be said, Jake got up and walked out of the hotel. As he looked back, he saw that Suzie was starting to have a breakdown.
However, Jake just about found the composure to keep his cool in front of her before driving away in a “crying rage fit.” All he could do now was go home, try and sleep things off, and wait for Suzie’s move. However, he wouldn’t have to wait long…
Jake admitted that he had no idea what his wife did for the rest of the weekend. However, she did send an endless number of texts and tried calling him the entire time.
Despite her desperation to get in touch, Jake didn’t pick up the phone once. By the time the weekend was over, he had already got movers to pick up all of her stuff. Moreover, Suzie arrived to return the signed separation agreement he had given her at the hotel.
A week after saying goodbye to her kids and relocating to a new apartment, Suzie contacted Jake once again. “She’s so sorry…wants another chance. She wants her family back. She’ll do anything. She’s on her knees crying into my lap,” he wrote.
However, Jake was firm with his wife, explaining that if she wanted him back, she’d need to organize marriage counseling for them. Although he didn’t want her living there, they ultimately came to some sort of agreement…
Jake explained that he came to an agreement with his wife of how to handle their family dynamic moving forward. According to him, Suzie came over three nights a week to cook, clean, and do the kids’ laundry.
However, Jake was often nowhere to be seen and would let Suzie do her parental duties before going back to her place. Outside of their responsibilities as parents, Jake had a strategy of how to handle his marriage with Suzie moving forward…
Instead of just making amends and going back to the status quo, Jake developed a fool-proof plan of how to make sure that he got his own way in the marriage moving forward.
He explained that they’d go to counseling, with the therapist putting an emphasis on Suzie’s problems. On the flip side, Jake did a good job of “playing the victim,” while refusing to give his wife any more chances. Jake began to reveal the many layers to his plan…
Jake revealed that he had been diagnosed with PTSD and depression as a result of this chapter in his life. Eventually, he managed to go part-time at work in order to deal with his problems. Six months later, Jake told Suzie that he was more interested in having an amicable divorce than trying to forgive her. However, he reiterated that she was still the love of his life and that maybe, they’d eventually be able to “give it another try.” But did they?
While Jake legally became the primary carer for his kids, he still needed to make them side with him after all of this. In order to achieve this, he ended up taking some pretty questionable measures.
Jake printed screenshots of a Google search for “how to survive you wife’s infidelity,” which he deliberately made sure his kids would find. After indirectly discovering that their mother had cheated on their father, it was very easy for the kids to side with Jake.
Jake took some pretty desperate measures to get revenge on his wife. However, after what he went through, it made sense that he did what he did. Jake ended up getting “generous child support” for going part-time.
And the perks don’t end there. “I get to have my fun with tinderellas and some FWBs,” he wrote. Jake is now a hero in his kids’ eyes, while his wife still believes that maybe they’ll get back together. “But that is never going to happen,” he said.

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What Happened When I Let My Husband Have A Girlfriend
By Alex Alexander — Written on Jan 08, 2022
Last year, my husband, Jason, found himself in a relationship with one of my girlfriends, Sarah. They had always gotten along well from the moment they were first introduced, and there were times they got along better than she and I did.
It was never an affair because I knew about everything and even encouraged him to pursue this polyamorous relationship beyond just casual friendship.
Sarah and Jason's attraction for each other was obvious, and as long as everyone was honest and following the rules, I figured it was better to let him try something crazy in full-disclosure rather than later and in secret.
Half the time it was an absolute disaster; the other half of the time was spent waiting for the next disaster. Here's the thing about setting rules for your husband to date one of your friends: it's nearly impossible! Yet, every once in a while there would be incredible moments where I would see Jason in a completely different way.
I realized how lucky I was that I wasn't just his girlfriend, but that I got to be his wife.
Now that time has passed and Sarah has moved on to become the wife of someone else, I'm able to look back at the lessons I learned from the six emotionally-charged months they spent together. I actually find myself grateful she came into our lives and messed everything up, so Jason and I could start over and fix what was failing.
One morning two of them were goofing around in the kitchen making breakfast. As I watched them, I realized that somewhere over the last 20 years I had forgotten how to be a girlfriend . I had fallen so diligently into my role as wife, mother, cook, organizer, assistant, and spouse that I had forgotten what it was like to be excited to see him whenever he walked into the room.
Seventeen years of marriage and I still got butterflies when I heard his key turn in the door at the end of the day, but for some reason, I never acted on it. Rather than staying in the rut of routine , I followed Sarah's example and started treating my husband more like my boyfriend. It's been fun to fall in love with him all over again.
After Jason and Sarah's first time sleeping together, my mind went into overdrive thinking about how much younger she was; how much more fun she must be; how much less her boobs must sag, and how he was never going to want to sleep with me again. Turns out, it was quite the opposite.
My husband and I have always valued sex as an incredibly important part of our relationship, and it's been frequent and magnificent over the last several years because we finally learned how to talk about it. We know how to kiss, caress, cuddle, and read each other down to something as simple as the brush of a fingertip. His time spent with Sarah, while new and exciting, was unfamiliar and ultimately not as fulfilling as sex with me.
Sarah loved to do things I didn't particularly enjoy. She loved weird movies, live music, spicy food, and was always willing to push Jason out of his comfort zone. She made him go Salsa dancing, taught him to like wine, and even convinced him to dress a little snazzier. Jason loosened up when he was with Sarah, and it helped him relax and become more comfortable in trying new things with me.
If Salsa dancing didn't kill him, taking a few dance classes with me certainly won't either. She was also able and willing to do a few things sexually that I was either unable or unwilling to do. I was relieved of a lot of guilt when Jason was able to experience things he had only seen or heard about in porn with an actual human.
Sarah was beautiful. She was the type of girl boys write songs for and girls gossip about. Her list of potential suitors was a mile long, but rather than pursue a relationship with one of them, she chose to spend her time with my husband.
Not only did this do incredible things for Jason's self-esteem, but it broke Sarah's bad-boy cycle. She loved how safe and comfortable she felt with Jason. As she witnessed our marriage and day-to-day life, it showed her what marriage could be and the qualities in a man that should be considered in a long-term relationship.
Having Sarah around was really hard at times. I often felt ignored and neglected, even though Jason swore he had never been more in love with me than after time spent with her. She was a wild adventure, but I'm home. He would talk about how being with me was where he belonged and he couldn't even entertain the idea of leaving me or ending up with someone else.
When I didn't believe him, he gave me the parable of the pizza. Jason's favorite food in the entire world is pizza. He could eat it for every meal, every day, and never tire of it. When Jason has Ethiopian food, he doesn't like pizza any less. Ethiopian food won't replace his lifelong love of pizza; it simply means trying something new made him appreciate what he loved even more.
Would I suggest letting your husband go out and get a girlfriend? Probably not. But what I would suggest is being open and honest with each other.
And if you decide to give it a try? Hopefully, you will come out of it with your relationship and commitment to each other stronger than it ever was before.
Alex Alexander is a writer and frequent contributor to YourTango.
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