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You don't know RJ Berger just yet, but give it time, you will. A total nerd, a complete dweeb and you guessed it, an absolute dork, RJ is a high school student stuck firmly in the lower level of the social hierarchy. But he does have one thing going for him: a giant penis. (Yes, we meant to write that.) And after everyone finds out this fun fact, his life is changed forever. Like another RJ before him ( Ron Jeremy ), he uses his colossal crank to turn his life around in MTV's upcoming new series, " The Hard Times Of RJ Berger " (premieres June 6 at 11/10c).
So ... in honor of RJ and his giant member, we present a list of Hollywood's seven biggest boners. Enjoy!
You may know him as an accomplished actor of stage and screen, but the women who have shared a bed with Liam Neeson know him as an accomplished actor of stage and screen with a huge wiener. According to former fling Janice Dick inson , Neeson had "the biggest penis of any man alive. He unzipped his pants and an Evian bottle fell out." Good to know, Dick.
Some of Hollywood's largest wangs are also some of its most mysterious. That's because a large dong reputation is often rooted in rumor and hearsay. Not so with Ewan McGregor, who's flashed his bits in as many as three films so that just about everyone knows he's packing a light saber in his underwear.
Like McGregor, Colin Farrell hasn't been shy about whipping out his wang for the camera. But unlike McGregor, Farrell's penis keeps getting left on the cutting room floor. First there was his nude scene in the 2004 film "A Home at the End of the World," which was reportedly cut because it excited female viewers too much during test screenings. Later that same year the camera captured his dong for "Alexander," but again, the scene was deleted. It was a decision that Farrell said made sense : "It’s a beautiful, gentle moment, and a f**king large c**k with huge b**ls is just f**king jarring.”
Willem Dafoe is widely rumored to be the owner of Hollywood's largest package. And while shooting his latest film, "Antichrist," director Lars Von Trier found out for himself. The film called for Dafoe to hack off his own member, but when it came time to shoot the scene, Von Trier decided to use a dick double. Not because he wanted to keep ladies from getting too excited, but because Defoe's penis is so large "everybody got very confused when they saw it."
The evidence that James Woods has huge wood is slim, but it's a rumor that's so well known in Hollywood that it's taken as the undisputed truth. Plus, Woods has been known to often joke about the size of his member. His best was a response to a rumor that a former lover super-glued his penis to his leg. "Well, actually, it was to my ankle," he said .
It has been said that Jared Leto has "Hollywood's biggest" baguette. Corroboration of that rumor comes from someone who would know. Porn star Corina Taylor , who once dated Leto, has said , "I’ve been a porn actress for three years, and Jared was the most I ever had to work with. There’s definitely a second career available for him if he ever runs out of mainstream work."
He may be best known for his white linen suits and well-manicured stubble, but Don Johnson's, well, johnson might be his most prized asset. According to the book "Penis Size and Enlargement," the "Miami Vice" star is hung like a speedboat. And a website with the authoritative name "Bulge Report" says that Johnson is sporting the penis of a porn king, which might actually be a line of work he's moving into considering the name of his next film, " A Good Old Fashioned Orgy ."
Milton Berle may be dead, but the legend of Hollywood's most famous dong lives on. Over the course of his career, the late actor became as well known for his prodigious penis as he was for his comedy. Berle's wang was so large that comedian Phil Silvers once snuck a peek while taking a leak and said, "You'd better feed that thing, or it's liable to turn on you!" Even after Uncle Milte's 2002 passing, people were talking about his member. During a memorial service, a comedian friend of Berle's announced, "On May 1 and May 2, his penis will be buried."
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This British woman believes size matters — and she’s got a new tattoo to prove it.
Tracy Kiss, 34, stunned family and friends after having a ruler tattoo inked down her forearm so she could accurately measure the length of her prospective partners’ penises.
The sex-minded mom — who has a 14-year-old daughter — told Jam Press that she’s looking for a well-endowed boyfriend, and her new body art is “a practical design and tool to enhance my life.”
The tattoo does not include any numbers, instead featuring “pretty dots” that are spaced an inch apart up Kiss’ arm.
“As it doesn’t have numbers, it’s actually rather discreet and allows me to innocently reach up to stroke a man’s stomach whilst taking a glance at my arm alongside it to count the inches,” the creative blonde exclaimed.
“It’s something people may not think about when shaking my hand and won’t look out of place in a nursing home when I’m 90 but will always put a smile on my face and twinkle in my eye,” she further enthused.
Kiss — who said she has a high libido and once had sex 11 times in a day — said knowing a partner’s size is important to her.
“I’m a woman who enjoys pleasure, body confidence and intimacy and feel that women have just as much right as men to speak honestly about sexual encounters,” she declared.
“It’s not all about size, it’s what you do with it and how your partner makes you feel when building an intimate connection, but for those who enjoy finer details, it really is the cherry on the cake for me!”
Kiss’ teenage daughter initially believed the tattoo was designed to measure bananas and cucumbers before she finally clocked what the erotic inking was actually for.
“My daughter is at an age now where she realizes my cheeky sense of humor and picks up on adult jokes which she’d missed before,” Kiss stated.
And while her child may not mind the raunchy inking, Kiss’ friends are less enamored.
“My friends think my new tattoo is a little outrageous … I doubt they’ll be lining up to get their own rulers inked anytime soon, but each to their own, whatever floats your boat!”
Kiss says the tattoo has other practical uses and recently came in handy while helping her mom pick out a new garden pot.
“My mom remarked at how handy it was to have a tattoo that could be used as a ruler. I smiled at her and said, ‘What a coincidence!’ Her new pots look lovely,” she chuckled.
Kiss has more than 70 other tattoos, and may soon add an extra inking so that she can measure a man’s girth.
“I am rather tempted to add some dots from my thumb to my index finger to measure girth at the same time but I’m not sure if it would be too obvious what I’m doing,” she stated. “I guess it all depends on where somebody is looking when I whip it out to count!”
Japan’s bizarre giant PENIS parade sees young brides ride 7ft-tall wooden phallus through streets for ancient fertility ritual
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The Hodare festival in the city of Nagaoka is considered one of the country's biggest, and best, penis festivals - and there are a few
In the UK, it's good luck for the bride to wear something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue.
But across Japan, you'll stand a better chance of marital success if the bride climbs atop a giant wooden penis and is paraded through town while waving to everyone.
The Hodare festival in the city of Nagaoka is considered one of the country's biggest, and best, penis festivals - and there are a few.
On the second Sunday of March each year, women who have wed in the past 12 months don traditional Japanese bridal gowns and straddle a totemic tool as it is carried through the streets.
The gigantic, seven foot phallus is celebrated as an emblem of good fortune, with huge crowds gathering to touch and stroke the mighty member as it passes.
The festivities are seen as bestowing fertility, marital bliss and good luck on those who participate.
"Hodare" translates into English as "male genitals", although apparently if spelled out in caps it means "ripening of rice plants" .
It is believed there have been Hodare festivals held in japan for centuries, although in recent years they have, unsurprisingly, become much bigger tourist attractions.
The parade comes after news that a housewife hacked at her husband's penis with a kitchen knife because he wouldn't have sex with her for over a decade.
Sex starved Rita Yadav almost fully detached Ved Prekash's genitals from the base during her vicious outburst, leaving him in a critical condition and with a cut that was almost four inches deep.
It took surgeons FIVE HOURS to reattach his penis and although Ved, 31, is now out of danger, he's still in hospital recovering.
Before slashing at his bits, Rita, 28, knocked out her taxi driver husband by hitting him over the head with a stone grinder.
She locked him in the bathroom following the attack at their home in Ghaziabad, northern India, on Thursday morning and then handed herself in at the local police station - telling horrified detectives that her actions were revenge.
Rita claimed that her husband refused to have sex with her for ten years of their 11-year marriage and she believed he was having an affair.
"He used to tell me he hated me," she said. "We used to fight daily and he told me he hated looking at my face. He always threatened he would have an affair.
"I was desperate to have children. I used to beg him but he said he’d make love to someone else instead. I’d been dealing with the torture for years and I couldn’t take any more."
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