How to Be a Footballer 🏈

How to Be a Footballer 🏈

👓 Crouch Peter
How to Be a Footballer 🏈

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How to Be a Footballer 🏈

✅ You ➡️👤 become a footballer 🏈 because you ➡️👤 love ❤️ football 🏈. And ➕ then you ➡️👤 are a footballer 🏈, and ➕ youre suddenly in the strangest, most baffling world 🗺️ of all. A world 🗺️ where one 1️⃣ team-mate comes ⤵️ to training 🚆 in a bright 🔆 red 🔴 suit 🕴️ with matching top 🔝-hat 🎩, cane and ➕ glasses 👓️, without any actual glass 🥛 in them ➡️👥, and ➕ another has so many sports cars 🚘️ they forget they have left ⬅️ a Porsche at the train 🚆 station 🚉. Even when their surname is incorporated in the registration plate 🍽️.
So walk 🚶 with me 👤⬅️ into the dressing 👗-room, to 🔎 find out which players refuse to touch a football 🏈 before a game 🎮️, to discover why ❓️ a load of millionaires never have any shower 🚿-gel, and ➕ to 👂️ hear what Cristiano Ronaldo says 💬 when he 👤👨 looks at himself in the mirror.👥⬅️
We will go ➡️ into post 🏤-match interviews, make 🛠️ fools of ourselves on social media and ➕ try to ensure that we 👥⬅️ never again 🔂 pay 💰️➡️ GBP2️⃣5️⃣0️⃣ for a haircut 💇 that should have cost a tenner. Well be coached and ➕ cajoled by Harry Redknapp, upset Rafa Benitez and ➕ be soothed by the sound 🔉 of an accordion played ▶️ by Sven-Goran Erikssons assistant Tord Grip. There will be some very ❗️ bad 👎️ music 🎼🎧️ and ➕ some very ❗️ bad 👎️ decisions.
I am Peter Crouch. This is How To Be A Footballer 🏈. Shall we 👥⬅️



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