How To Wank Someone Off
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How To Wank Someone Off
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Men: A step-by-step guide to masturbating for heightened pleasure TIMESOFINDIA.COM | Last updated on -Sep 9, 2020, 18:13 IST Share
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Let’s be honest, there is no better way to explore your body than enjoying a little solo session, every once in a while. Masturbation or the act of self-pleasure is one of the best ways to relax and release all the stress accumulated in the body. It not only helps in getting in ‘touch’ with your erogenous zones but is also a great way to spice up your sex life.
It does not matter whether you are venturing into the solo play session for the first time or are a regular player, it is never too late to learn tips and tricks which can blow your mind. We present you a step-by-step breakdown on how to show yourself a little love and reach new erotic heights. You can thank us later.
First things first, it is important to get comfortable and find a place where you can solely focus on ‘self-love’. Whether it is the washroom or the comfort of your blanket, turn down the lights and put on your favourite music. Choose from erotic videos or reads and make yourself comfortable.
Men, instead of going for a quick ejaculation, take it slow for an enhanced experience. Instead of going the regular route, explore your body for a bit and learn what excites you the most. Close your eyes and pay attention to the various strokes and motions. Experiment with speed as it will let you know what works the best for you.
Guys, if you regularly masturbate by sitting down, we suggest switching things up. Try doing it while standing in the shower, sitting on a chair, kneeling or even lying on your side. When you masturbate in the same position every day, it takes the fun away from the solo session.
Yes, you read that right. A lot of men are not aware of the fact that their nipples can actually help them multiply their pleasure. Nipple stimulation can help in increasing your sexual arousal, ever-so-gently and help you get closer to a knee-jerking orgasm. You may use bobby pins (or clamps) if you feel like and gently tease your nipples and increase your pleasure. If you are not one to go for clamps, we suggest slowly (and sensually) massaging your nipples till they get erect. Continue playing with them with your free hand, while stroking your penis.
Pretty much an extension of changing things, switching your hands can heighten your pleasure and take it to the next level. When you jerk off with your non-dominant hand, it may feel like someone else is giving you a handjob, which intensifies the feeling. It also gives you a free hand to browse through erotic ‘videos’, allowing you to multitask.
Also known as edging, it is the art of stopping just before you reach the peak, and then starting again. It will not only increase your stamina but as you get closer and closer to the edge, you will ultimately have a mind blowing orgasm as the result of all the build-up. Patience is the key. The more patient you are while enjoying the process, the more powerful orgasm you will end up experiencing. Mark our words. Prolonging this feeling of arousal will also help you last longer in bed and go on, till your partner actually wants you to stop.
Instead of doing the regular up and down thrusting, find different ways of putting your hands to good use. Some of them are:
3. Touching the penis head while stroking
Men, your balls are probably the most ignored aspect of your sexual escapades. Start playing down there, squeeze a little or even pull them down a bit while you stroke yourself. Playing with your balls can open new doors of pleasure you were not aware of.
Once you understand how you like playing with your balls, you can use both your hands to get closer to a knee-jerking orgasm. Use your non-dominant hand to stroke your penis to erection and the other to cup your testicles gently.
Yes, you read that right. Taking things further, try and find your prostate and stimulate it slowly. Start by massaging your prostate by inserting a clean, lubed-up finger in your rectum. If you are not comfortable using your finger, start slow and understand how it makes you feel. Once you begin enjoying the anal stimulation, it will certainly take your orgasm game to the next level.
As per many sex experts, the idea of watching yourself masturbate can turn you on further. If you have a mirror in your room, it’s time you use it.
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As women in society, we are often taught to put our needs last, and this comes into the bedroom as well. We’re taught, whether it be through movies, porn , or TV, that pleasing our partner is paramount , and pleasing ourselves comes secondary. Because of this, even the thought of taking our orgasms (literally) into our own hands through masturbation is an idea that only crosses our minds when we’re alone and really feeling ourselves. It’s a private, deeply personal experience that we, as women, rarely even speak of—not with our friends, not with our intimate partners.
“We’ve been socialized to believe that masturbation in and of itself is ‘naughty,'” says Vanessa Marin, sex therapist and creator of Finishing School , an online course that teaches women to orgasm. “So the idea of doing it openly in front of another person can seem even naughtier. But the thing is, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable in front of our partners creates intimacy and connection.”
Whether you’re trying to spice things up in the bedroom or just looking for a way to take back your power when it comes to your pleasure (which, BTW, heck yes), there are a few steps you can take to become more comfortable with the idea of masturbating in front your partner. We know, it may sound weird or scary at first, and it may be something you’ve never even thought of. But honestly, with the way these sex experts break it down, it sounds like an empowering way for you to use your own sexy skills to your advantage.
Of course, normalizing female masturbation has a long way to go, but getting comfortable with doing it in front of the partners that know and love us is one step in the right direction. The spotlight’s on you, boo.
“Turning your partnered masturbation experience into a ritual starts with the way you set up your space,” says Sara Trivette , a sex therapist. She suggests getting your environment ready the same way you should with your headspace. “Declutter your room, light a candle, play some music that gets you in the mood, and bring in any special items that feel meaningful to you.” This way, you’ll be excited and not distracted when it’s time to get started.
Having an open mind is key here. Try not to get too into your own head about the actual act of masturbating in front of someone. It will feel less isolating and put less pressure on you if your partner is excited about doing it, too. Marin suggests having a conversation with your partner before diving in, especially if you’re feeling a bit nervous before taking the stage.
“You can mention that you got the idea from a conversation with a friend or an article that you read,” she suggests. “So for example, you can say something like, ‘My friend told me she was hooking up with this guy and he asked her to masturbate for him. Do you want to watch me touch myself?’ Or, ‘I read this article that recommended masturbating together. Sounds hot, don’t you think?'”
Whatever option you choose, make sure you present the idea of masturbating together as something that is really hot, exciting, and sexy, because it is!
“It’ll be easier to self-pleasure in front of your partner if you’re already feeling aroused,” says Trivette. “So, get the sexual energy flowing by making out or stroking and caressing each other—whatever makes you feel turned on.” As your clothes come off, reach between your legs and start touching yourself. You can say something like, “Do you like watching that?” or “Do you want to see what I do to get myself off?”
At the end of the day, it’s about the connection you not only feel with your partner, but with yourself as well.
“Let your partner know where you want them to be while you self-pleasure,” Trivette tells us. “Maybe you want them spooning you from behind, or lying in front of you and stroking your hair. Don’t be afraid to tell them what would make you feel most comfortable.”
You can also just be in whatever position you’re usually in when you masturbate alone. Trivette describes it as a “choose-your-own-adventure kind of experience” where you’re the one who is totally in control of what makes you feel sexiest. You can be sitting, kneeling, lying down, it’s all totally up to you.
Once you’re ready, begin to self-pleasure.
You can take yourself all the way to orgasm or not. Or you might decide to switch roles, turn this into love-making, or have the both of you masturbate side by side one another while using toys . Seriously, it’s all about what’s going to make you feel best in this moment.
Masturbating alone is pretty relaxing, so why shouldn’t you have the same feeling about doing it in front of your partner? Remember to breathe, relax, and allow yourself to have fun.
Don’t beat yourself up if you need more of a push to get to the end zone. This is a very vulnerable thing to do, even with your partner, and it’s important that’s there’s trust built between the two of you. If this something you’d like to continue to do with your partner, just think of your first time as practice—the more times you do this, the more comfortable you will feel.
Once you’ve done it, you have every right to celebrate. It takes a certain level of courage to masturbate in front of your partner. Both of our experts say that showing your partner(s) how you like to be touched and what makes you tick is a great way to bring you closer to each other. And when you become more experienced, you can begin to implement new positions , tricks, and toys into your mutual masturbation routine. Who knows—you may even decide to make sexy solo time a regular thing.
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