How To Stimulate Your Clit

How To Stimulate Your Clit

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Maressa Brown is a journalist and astrologer who's a regular lifestyle contributor and resident astrologer for InStyle. She has nearly two decades of professional experience writing, reporting, and editing lifestyle content for a variety of digital and print consumer-facing publications including Parents, Shape, Astrology.com, and more. She is currently based in Los Angeles and completing her first title with Artisan Books to be published in early 2023.

For as long as science has been aware of the clitoris, it has been the subject of much scrutiny, confusion, and dismissal.

The Greeks seemed to get the hype, as the word for the female organ comes from the Greek kleitoris , which has been translated as both "little hill" and "to rub." But that doesn't even begin to cover the treasure trove of nerves, blood vessels, and, in turn, the potential mind-blowing pleasure that it offers — right at our fingertips.

And that pleasure part is key. Casey Tanner , certified sex therapist and an expert for sex toy company LELO , explains that the clitoris is the only genital organ that functions solely for sexual satisfaction as opposed to reproduction. "The clitoris has 8,000 nerve endings in the tip alone," she notes. "That's twice as many as the penis, and yet the clitoris often gets only half of the attention, if that."

It's no wonder that, according to a study of over a thousand women published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy , 37% reported clitoral stimulation was necessary for orgasm during intercourse, and an additional 36% indicated that, while clitoral stimulation was not needed, their orgasms feel better if their clitoris is stimulated during intercourse. And while you might think of clitoral and vaginal orgasms as two different things, we now know that what most of us think of the clitoris is actually just the external tip of the iceberg — the clitoris continues inside of the body, too. "Even vaginal orgasms are dependent on the clitoris, which is much larger than its visible tip such that it can be stimulated internally through penetration," says Tanner.

No doubt that's a case for learning more ways to enjoy the ultimate pleasure spot. Here, the best ways to stimulate the clitoris on your own or with a partner, according to Tanner and other sex experts.

Those same 8,000 nerve endings mean that the clitoris is sensitive in the best way, but sometimes friction can increase sensitivity to the point of discomfort or pain — especially when the clitoris is aroused, which experts will refer to as erect (yep, same as a penis), says Tanner. And although your vaginal tunnel is capable of creating its own lube when you're turned on, the clitoris is not.

For that reason, Tanner says it's vital to introduce a lubricant to stave off chafing and dryness. She recommends starting with a water-based lubricant (like LELO's Personal Moisturizer , $25 for 5 fl. oz.). "It uses natural ingredients, is pH balanced to prevent infection, and safe for use with toys," says Tanner. "A little goes a long way, so massage a few drops onto the clitoris and add as needed."

If you're new to clitoral stimulation, Tanner offers the following tips for getting acquainted with your clit.

Be mindful. Try explorative touch with the optional addition of a hand-held mirror. "Every clit is different, so notice the anatomy of yours," she notes. "Where is it in relation to your labia? How large or small is it? Take note of the clitoral hood, the small fold of skin that surrounds the head of the clitoris. No need to judge or label – simply notice." After all, the more familiar you become, the easier it will be to locate during solo play, she points out.

Start with a super slow, gentle touch. "Even before you touch, you can give the vulva a little hug," advises Amy Baldwin, sex educator and co-host of the Shameless Sex Podcast . "Cup the vulva with your well-lubed hand, and let it hang out there so the skin temperatures can acclimate to one another."

Try different patterns. "Use your index and middle fingers to massage the head in small, circular motions," advises Tanner, who adds that you might also enjoy rubbing the same fingers back and forth just slightly across your clitoris in small, straight lines, noting the difference in sensation.

Other motions to consider, according to Baldwin: kneading, pinching, swirling, stroking, tugging, and tapping on and all around the clitoris, including the labia.

Use varying pressures. "Experiment with pressing down harder as your massage, finding an intensity that feels stimulating without causing discomfort," suggests Tanner.

When it comes to the amount of pressure you might prefer, consider that the main factor in the sensitivity of your clitoris is the size of your clitoral hood. "The anatomical equivalent to the foreskin on a penis, the hood is the small fold of skin that surrounds the head of the clitoris to protect its delicate tissue from friction," explains Tanner. "When the clitoris becomes erect, the clitoral hood retracts to expose the sensitive tissue to pleasurable sensations. Folks with a larger clitoral hood, and thus more protection, may be able to tolerate more direct and intense touch. People with a thinner or smaller hood may find that they enjoy a lighter touch."

And if you happen to have a larger clitoral hood, you can also manually retract it by taking your index finger and pulling upwards slightly on the skin above your clitoris, she recommends. Then, using your fingers or a vibrator, you'll notice the increased sensitivity to touch.

Be indirect. "If these options are feeling too sensitive, try massaging your clitoris indirectly, through your labia," notes Tanner. "Use your fingers to move your labial folds over your clitoris, and then try the same techniques again. If these options aren't stimulating enough, use a vibrator to up the intensity."

You can also simply spend time massaging the outer areas of the vulva, including the labia majora and minora and opening of the vagina where the clitoral anatomy attaches internally, recommends Shannon Chavez, Psy.D., a psychologist and sex therapist in Los Angeles .

If you're partnered: The same techniques described above can be used by someone else during partnered sex, either with a partner's fingers or tongue, notes Tanner. "Use directive language, such as 'a bit softer' or 'a little to your right,'" she suggests. "If you're comfortable doing so, move their hand to locate your clit, or show them where it is using your own hand. Introduce these activities by letting your partner know that you're learning more about what makes you feel good, and you want them to be part of that."

If you're a seasoned pro at jilling off, consider these next-level moves.

Try layering. "When playing solo, try massaging your clitoris indirectly, through your labia, to control for the sensitivity of your clitoris," recommends Tanner. "This technique involves using your fingers to move your labial folds over your clitoris before applying pressure."

Experiment with "broadening." In order to explore what different surface areas feel like on your clitoris, you can move away from using just two fingers and try using the surface of your palm instead.

If you're partnered: "When choosing a position, think about angling yourself such that each thrust or hand motion will also hit rhythmically against your clitoris," advises Tanner. "For example, ask your partner to lie on their back while you straddle them seated on top. Rather than moving vertically — up and down — angle your body forward at about 45 degrees, letting your clitoris rub against the shaft of their penis or strap-on." Another option: "Choose positions such as doggie style, wherein you or your partner have a free hand that can stimulate the clitoris with fingers or toys during penetration," she says.

Interested in incorporating some tech-savvy gear? Consider these tips.

Reach for a wand toy. There's no doubt that you can use a classic wand vibrator on the clitoris. Because the head is larger than a cylindrical model, it'll cover more surface area of the clit, says Chavez.

Try internal stimulation. "Thrusters or curved devices will stimulate the G-spot and can be moved from side to side and stimulate the internal anatomy of the clitoris," points out Chavez.

Explore with a clitoral vibrator. You might also consider experimenting with toys that were designed with clitoral stimulation in mind. If you're playing solo, Tanner likes LELO's ORA 3 ($169; LELO.com ). "It has a rotating tongue stimulator that mirrors the sensation of oral sex and can be applied directly to the clitoris for intense stimulation, or massaged around the clitoris for a slightly more gentle experience," she notes.

If you're with a partner: "If you're desiring more clitoral stimulation with a partner, try introducing TIANI 3 ($169; LELO.com ) in the missionary position," she recommends. "Insert the smaller arm into the vagina, and the larger one on your clitoris. You or your partner can then use the hand-held remote control to explore different settings and intensities."

No matter what technique you're using, do your best to be patient with yourself and how long it might take to reach climax. "Porn and romcoms depict people with vulvas orgasming after mere seconds of sexual activity, and this is not reflective of reality," says Tanner. "If your goal is to have an orgasm, it's not at all abnormal to need 20 minutes or more to get yourself there. Take breaks, or alternate between internal and external stimulation if sensitivity becomes a problem."

Aside from techniques to stimulate the clitoris, communication with your partner is essential to reach orgasm and enjoy much more fulfilling sex. Want to know more?
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Prause, N., Kuang, L., Lee, P., & Miller, G. (2016). Clitorally Stimulated Orgasms Are Associated With Better Control of Sexual Desire, and Not Associated With Depression or Anxiety, Compared With Vaginally Stimulated Orgasms. Journal of Sexual Medicine , 13 (11), 1676–1685. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jsxm.2016.08.014 Wallen K, Lloyd EA. Female sexual arousal: genital anatomy and orgasm in intercourse. Horm Behav . 2011;59(5):780–792. doi:10.1016/j.yhbeh.2010.12.004 Herbenick, D., Fu, T. C. (Jane), Arter, J., Sanders, S. A., & Dodge, B. (2018). Women’s Experiences With Genital Touching, Sexual Pleasure, and Orgasm: Results From a U.S. Probability Sample of Women Ages 18 to 94. Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy , 44 (2), 201–212. https://doi.org/10.1080/0092623X.2017.1346530
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Written and verified by the philosopher Isbelia Esther Farías López .
Trying to effectively fulfill the sexual needs of a woman and give her pleasure is no simple matter. In fact, having the best of intentions won’t cut it if you want to achieve this goal. That’s why you won’t want to miss out on these techniques to stimulate the clitoris.
We know that reaching the female orgasm isn’t exactly easy and requires a lot of work with your partner. It takes a lot of communication and teamwork to achieve it as demonstrated in a study conducted by Utahn State University .
Great communication doesn’t just allow you to explore what both parties like and prefer, it also helps each person get to know themselves better both inside and outside of the intimacy. However, it’s key to know the erogenous zones of your partner and how to stimulate them.
When it comes to the female body, the clitoris is one of those zones that causes anxiety, not only for its complexity, but because it represents one of the best sources of pleasure. However, it’s essential to know how to touch it because it’s quite a sensitive zone.
The clitoris is a highly sensitive sex organ. To date, the only known function of the clitoris is to provide the woman with sexual pleasure.
For women, stimulating the clitoris is no trivial matter. While sexual preferences can vary from one woman to the next, it’s been shown that the ability to stimulate this organ is the key to the female organism .
For example, in a study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine , the majority of women (64%) reported that stimulating the clitoris and the vagina formed part of their usual techniques to achieve orgasm. Plus, stimulation was also associated with a higher sex drive and greater sexual arousal.
In another investigation published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy , experts carried out a survey of 1055 women, aged between 18 and 94, with questions focusing on sexual pleasure, the orgasm, and genital contact .
According to the results of this survey, 18.4 % of the women questioned said that they could achieve orgasm through vaginal intercourse alone, while 36.6 % said that stimulation of the clitoris was necessary.
Another 36% indicated that, while they could achieve orgasm through intercourse alone, their orgasms felt better when the clitoris was stimulated during sex. So, what are the best techniques to stimulate the clitoris?
This piece of basic advice is important for you to remember. Go little by little; taking time to admire and, at the same time, stimulate the female body is part of the key to success with this technique.
Remember that the clitoris is incredibly sensitive . Precisely because of this quality, experts recommend that you maintain a progressive rhythm in terms of the intensity of stimulation.
Adult films, better known as pornographic movies , can be stimulating for some couples and can help, to some extent, to break the ice. However, it’s important to bear in mind that these are often exaggerated and unrealistic performances .
If what you want is to offer an unforgettable cocktail of passion and orgasms, the most important thing is to make love that’s full of imagination and caresses. You should never overstimulate or be rough with the delicate area of the clitoris. Sometimes, less is more. So, it’s preferable to:
It’s just as the title suggests. If you’ve fulfilled all the previous techniques to stimulate the clitoris and the moment is right to start using a bit of rhythm and creativity , you can take it to the net level: start gently sucking. You’ll probably notice more moaning coming from your partner as you do so.
This technique consists of sucking the area of the clitoris with low pressure and keeping it in your mouth for short intervals, then giving small “taps” with the tip of your tongue as you notice how, due to the stimulation, the area swells a little.
If things are really hotting up and passion is in the air, the only possible limitation is ignorance. So, in addition to sucking the clitoris, it’s time to use your fingers. By combining movements with your fingers and tongue in a simultaneous way, you’ll increase the pleasure by 100% .
Stimulating the clitoris is essential for female pleasure . As such, it can be really useful to try out some of these techniques with your partner, and most importantly, ask what they like and don’t like. With good communication, both of you will have a better understanding of what works.
Did you know there are tons of nerve endings in female breasts? Using the right technique to stimulate a woman's nipples can be very arousing for y...
Written and verified by the philosopher Isbelia Esther Farías López .
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Clitoris or clit of a woman has confused many men even the experienced ones. This is tiny structure located just above her vaginal opening over inner labia. The clit of woman is like penis to man. This tiny structure has many nerve endings and gets engorged when woman is excited. The best clitoral stimulation techniques can make intensity and pleasure of climax many times higher and bring a woman to screaming climaxes . Here are few positions and techniques on how to give clitoral orgasm to a woman.
During lovemaking woman has two types of stimulations vaginal and clitoral. Majority of woman prefer clitoral stimulation over the other one. But still take care before you begin with clitoral stimulation as some woman may not like being stimulated there. If you are making love to a woman for the first time check by touching her clit and see her response. If she likes it you have a go. You can stimulate clit of a woman by touching it with fingers. It is sensitive and delicate part, so do not apply excess pressure, or do it in a hurry. Give sensuous touches first and increase pressure by a bit when she is excited. You can also play it with your tongue. Touch it with hard tongue or beat with it, but stay gentle and light. Fingers and mouth are good techniques about how to give clitoral orgasm to a woman.
These are not all and we are not stopping after these techniques only. The best clitoral stimulation techniques are the ones which you can employ when actual lovemaking begins after penetration. Here is one which can bring immense pleasure to your girl and make her ecstatic. Lie down on your back and let the girl straddle you. Let her get over with penetration and rest her buttocks over your groin and knees on either of your waist. Now take your hand towards your organ and place it there forming a Vulcan V with two fingers. Keep your index and middle finger over one side of your organ and other two on other side. Raise you knuckles a bit. Your hand will be in perfect position where knuckles are going to rub your girl’s clitoris when she will go up and down over your organ. You can notice the difference in her excitement instantly and will see much intense climax.
In missionary pose you can grind clit of your woman and give her mind-blowing climaxes. Penetrate her in missionary pose but do not let her surround you with her legs. Keep her legs bent on either side of your waist with heels planted on bed. Now lean forward bending your back a bit and touch upper part of her genital passage with your pubic bone. You can make forward and backward movements and even in left and right direction to press her clit with your pubic bone. Do not worry about your organ being static in her passage just maintain it as deep as possible and clit stimulation alone will take her to much greater heights of ecstasy. You can also make circular movements to grind her clit gently with your pubic bone. This is one of the best clitoral stimulation techniques which can bring woman to earth-shattering climaxes.
You can take also perform clit stimulation by taking your woman on top. Here is another technique of how to give clitoral orgasm to a woman . Lie down on your back and let her come in cow girl position. Keep her bent knees on either side of your waist
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How To Stimulate Your Clit

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