How To Not Be A Hoe

How To Not Be A Hoe
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We’re creatures of habit. We do what we think we’re supposed to do when we’re supposed to do it because that’s what we’re told is “right.” For instance, we’re not supposed to interact in sexual activity before we’re married. News flash, people do it, they just don’t talk about doing it. All of this pressure is put on us to do things a certain way. Graduate high school, graduate college, start your career, get married, have children, etc. But not everyone does this. No one tells you that while you’re in the midst of getting your college degree, you’ll start to date someone who’s going to change your outlook on everything, including how you view yourself.
You’ll date that one person that seems almost perfect in the beginning, but as time goes on, you’ll slowly start to sacrifice a lot about yourself to continue to please that person. Don’t do this. Run. Get out! You won’t though. You’ll stay until the relationship is almost debilitating. It’ll feel like you can’t breathe and you’ll become solely dependent on that other person. After the breakup, which is going to be messy and hurt A LOT, your sex drive is going to go into overload. There’s nothing wrong with this and it’s completely normal. You deserve it. Every girl needs a hoe phase and this is why:
Obviously, you don’t need a man to tell you you’re sexy, but it doesn’t hurt! It’s also very liberating to be able to be that vulnerable in front of someone and not really care what they’re thinking because you have become so in sync with every inch of your body! IT’S LIBERATING! Explore your body and become more comfortable in your own skin. When coming out of a long relationship, it’s weird to get back on the saddle and you’re going to have doubts, but this is where you get to begin loving yourself again. So do it and do it as much as you want!
After coming out of a long relationship, especially one that ended poorly, you have a lot of self doubt. You may not feel pretty, smart, happy, etc., but you can only wallow in self doubt for so long. You need to learn to love yourself. No one wants to have sex with the girl that cries afterwards because she’s still in love with her ex boyfriend. DON’T BE THAT GIRL. Instead, use this time to feel yourself a little more than before. Use this time to become the girl you used to be before you fell for the douchebag that ruined your image of yourself. You’re in control and that’s something that should be sexy all on its own!
After hooking up with what’s his face, you’re going to be dying to tell your friends and they’re going to be intrigued to listen! There’s nothing better than sending a text that says “so…I did a thing last night…” She’s going to know exactly what that means and the details are going to start to unravel! The best part of this is that you’re going to be able to go through it step by step and because he’s not your boyfriend, you’re going into complete detail and even answering the question about his penis size. You’ve just become Super Woman to your friends…especially if you’ve hooked up with people you’ve all known for a long time. You’re answering questions for them that they’ve kind of always wondered about but could never really confirm or deny! Go slay, girl!
It’s sad that we even have to call it a “hoe phase” when men do it regularly. Casual sex is okay for men to do, but not women? WRONG. Don’t feed into the bullshit double standards and be happy doing what you want with whoever you want! You’re equally as entitled to have fun and keep it casual with anyone you chose.
Because you’re exploring, this is a GREAT opportunity to for you to find things that work for you and things that don’t. While you’re out discovering yourself, you’re going to come across things that you’ve never experienced before and you’re going to learn real quickly if you life them or if you don’t. This is an exploration and learning experience, take full advantage of it!
That’s right, you are now able to do exactly what you want whenever the hell you want without having to think about how it’s going to affect someone else! You spend so long making decisions based on the both of you, that it feels good to be a little selfish right now! You deserve it, girl! If you want to get drunk on a Monday night, guess what? You can! If you want to go home with that really cute guy from the bar, guess what? You can! You want to wear that slutty outfit, guess what? NOW YOU CAN! You got out and now you don’t need to be tamed!
Hoe out. Have fun. Enjoy finding yourself. As long as you’re protecting yourself, live it up! This is going to be an exploration of yourself like you’ve never had before. You need this, you just don’t know how much yet, but you will! Now go be Super Woman or bang Super Woman, whichever you prefer! Just enjoy yourself while doing it!
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Listen more and talk about yourself less. People are probably going to get annoyed if you make everything about you. If you have exciting news or something cool to share that adds to the conversation, you do not have to hold it in. But try to give other people a chance to contribute to and lead conversations. [1]
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Don't automatically resort to chattering about yourself when a conversation stalls. Instead, try asking other people questions about themselves and really listen to their answers.
For example, you might say something like, "You've mentioned before that you like K-pop music. Do you have a favorite band?"
You might say to a friend, "Tell me about your weekend—I'm dying to know how your date with Elliot went!"

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Don't interrupt people when they're talking. It's easy to irritate someone if you interrupt them when they're in the middle of a sentence. Interrupting basically communicates to them that you have no interest in what they're saying, or that what you want to say is more important. Let people complete their sentences before contributing to the conversation.

It can help to pause for a few seconds to make sure they're finished before you share your thoughts.
No one appreciates being interrupted, but it can get you into real trouble if you habitually interrupt a teacher, boss, or other authority figure.

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Spend less time talking about negative stuff. It is totally normal to vent and share negative things sometimes, especially with close friends, but if every sentence out of your mouth is a complaint or negative, people may start to avoid you. Also, constant negative commentary at work or in other group situations tends to create a toxic environment for everyone. Try to look on the bright side and spread positivity instead of negativity! [2]
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For example, instead of saying, "Ugh, they're serving that disgusting meatloaf in the cafeteria again today," you might say, "Good thing the cafeteria is serving pumpkin pie today. Delicious pie will help us all forget about that meatloaf!"

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Avoid oversharing to prevent others from feeling awkward. Sharing detailed information about your personal life can make others really uncomfortable, especially coworkers and acquaintances. Depending on what you're sharing, your friends might also get pretty annoyed! Avoid telling people intimate details about your love life or physical health unless you know them well. [3]
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For example, if your coworker asks you how your weekend went, you probably shouldn't respond with a monologue about your hemorrhoid flare up. Something like, "I was actually feeling pretty under the weather this weekend," will suffice.
Don't describe every gory detail of the horror movie you watched last night while your best friend tries to eat her lunch.

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Speak at a normal volume to communicate clearly and effectively. It's fine to raise your voice for effect while telling a story or to whisper in a quiet room, but people get really annoyed if you constantly speak at maximum volume or habitually mumble. Match the volume of your voice to those around you and try not to talk over them. If you tend to speak too softly or mumble, work on enunciating and projecting your voice.

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Don't repeat words or actions over and over. Doing this might seem cute or funny at first, but constantly repeating the same words or actions (such as making inappropriate sounds or repeating a phrase) is going to get on people's nerves. If a person asks you to stop doing what you're doing, listen to them! If you continue without stopping, you might lose a friend. [4]
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Do not mimic other people or repeat their words back to them for no reason.
Say something once unless they ask you to repeat it.

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Pay attention to the tone of your voice and what it might convey. Even if your words are thoughtful and important, your tone of voice may indicate frustration, crankiness, or a condescending attitude. You may not even realize you are being cranky, but things like being tired or stressed can make you that way.
If you notice people around you reacting, take a moment to check your tone. Try to speak in a respectful tone and phrase things in a positive manner.

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Do not send more than 1 or 2 texts if you have not gotten a response. Sending text after text, especially when you have not even received a response to the first one, will get on the other person's nerves pretty fast. Give them time to respond. Blowing up your friend's phone might seem innocent enough—until you find out later that she was at a funeral and that's why she did not respond right away.
Repeatedly texting a crush can ruin a romance before it even begins. If you've sent 2 texts and your crush did not answer either of them, they may be trying to tell you they are uninterested.

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Avoid group texting unless there is a real reason to do it. Adding your circle of friends or multiple family members to a group text just to share unimportant information will definitely annoy them. Other group members then chime in and suddenly everyone is getting a constant stream of pointless notifications!
If you have something super brief to share that doesn't require a response, it might be okay occasionally, but otherwise, avoid group texting!

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Keep your texts relatively brief. Habitually texting incredibly lengthy or detailed messages irritates others and they may stop reading your texts altogether. If you have something important to say, call them or ask to meet up with them! Keep your texts short, sweet, and to the point. [5]
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Writing text "novels" might be especially annoying for your crush or someone you went on 1 date with.

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